Well I think I overshoot what B-day you were to be having, but you know me, but its still the same feelings and thoughts, so many memories come to me, whether I am awake or asleep. The day you had 70's day at high school and we drug out all my old stuff and you wore it!

Ot the day the principal called me to tell me about your tattoos, and I tore into him and told him I wold come up there and show him mine! LOL!!

Or when we both had our tongues pierced and it always freaked Lori and Jason out!

Who will ever forget the Thanksgiving that wasn't, because me and you went to the movies!

Or the time you bought the tv and we couldnt fit it in your car!!

Or the time the cops came to the door and said a car was out in a ditch, it was Jason's and you drove me out there to look!!! What a scare!!

Ohhhhhhhh it goes on and on, you were such a big part of my life, all of our lives, but the later part me and you stayed close and shared so much!! 

Aaron you will live on in my heart FOREVER!

I go back to that day so easily, as I do all of my kids births! but yeah Aaron,  you were in a big hurry, I got to the hosp. and you were born 30 minutes later! What a Shock!!! But you were beautiful! I dont think a mother ever forget the day their kids were born, and I know we all shared all of you alls, every year! It was in a military hosp. and they were pretty rugged back then, it was just me and you and a nurse and the Dr. walked in and caught you! 

I still can't quite believe you are gone, it still hurts so dam much, how could you be gone. Not only for me for Pam and the kids! But Aaron she is doing so good w/ keeping your memory alive for them, I am so proud of her for that! 

It will never be the same, what I would give to look out that back yard on easter and see your kids, Lori's kids and Jason chasing them all. Its the dream we all always had! but dreams are dreams, never to come true. I have learned that in these 3 years, I ask over and over why you? I still need you so very much, I even said I wish I had had about 3 more kids! LOL!

There are no answers, I know that know, I want to try so hard to get back to a more or less normal life, but I dont think it ever will be, I think of you every day, and think of all our talks on the phone all the time about everything. gosh I sure miss you! I don think any mother should ever have to go through this, its the most unfair thing there is! 

No matter what day, night, you are are always in my heart. I look up at the stars and I wander if you can see them too, I look to the full moon and I always think of us talking about it, and wander if you see what I see.

I dont know when my end will be, but all I want to know is if I will be able to be w/ you again??  Love always, mom

Friends may think we have forgotten
When at times they see us smile.
Little do they know the heartaches,
That our smiles hide, all the while.
Beautiful memories are wonderful things,
That last 'til the longest day.
They never wear out, they never get lost,
And can never be given away.
To some you may be forgotten,
To others, a part of the past,
But to those who love you and lost you,
You memory will always last.
Author Unknown