ForeverMissed
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The world lost Barry L, Grote, AKA ‘The Great One’, retired pilot, master woodworker, hunter, fisherman, contrarian, solver of the mysteries of the universe, master of sarcasm, riddler, engineer, generous spirit, beloved husband, father, grandfather, brother and friend to many left his earthly bodily containment after an extraordinarily courageus battle with cancer on August 28th, 2015. We will cherish the memories of Barry forever.

Barry was preceded in death by his beloved mother and father, Don and Phyllis Grote of Aberdeen, and survived by his beloved wife, Janice Grote, his daughers, Chaille Lemcke  (Craig) and Cheri Colter (Richard), grandaughers, Milena Lemcke, Aurora Colter & Chloe Colter. Barry is also survived by his beloved brothers Don, Randy, Brant, and Richard, & sisters Valerie, Laurie, Patsy and Pamela.

A narrative of The Great One can be found on the next tab under 'His Life'. Please feel free to share your own narratives, memories, & pictures!

A informal open house in Celebration of Barry's Life  gathering for family and friends will be held in Crystal Lake, IL on Friday, Oct. 2nd at D'Andrea's at 4:00 PM, and in Aberdeen SD on Friday, Oct. 9th at the Dakota Event Center at 4:00 PM.

In lieu of flowers, donations can be made to the following organizations that Barry supported:  Feed the Children (www.FeedTheChildren.org) St. Joseph Indian School (www.stjo.org) and South Dakota Wildlife Federation (www.sdwf.org)
 
Barry was also preceded in death by a few kitties:  Patches and Sylvester , of Crystal Lake Il,  & The Dooter of Denver, CO, Ming of Dallas, TX (cats and grandcat – debatable on the beloved part there), and survived by Monique, Yoyo, and Nijinsky 'Ninja' Colter (Dallas granddog & grandcats,  Mooshus & Ivan Lemcke ( Denver grandcats) – also questionable beloved ones but all cats and dog survivors of The Great One nonetheless.

August 28, 2023
August 28, 2023
Thank you Gordy and Terry for sharing your memories of Barry today. It meant so much to hear from you today. It's also Chaille's birthday so an emotional day for our family. We will celebrate Barry on his heavenly birthday, Oct. 1st. Thank you, once again for your thoughtfulness1
August 28, 2023
August 28, 2023
Well, I was doing OK until John Denver "You fill up my senses." All those happy pictures of Jan and Barry, and family, and ducks, and antelope, and fish, and airplanes. Barry and I shared adventures back in his Air Force days. We rejoiced over each others new babies, hunted semi-successfully in Oklahoma, and had flying stories I still enjoy re-living. It seems so unfair, looking at all the photos of his life, that I am still enjoying these things, and he has been gone eight years. It is comforting to know that some day we will be able to do it all again, forever.
August 28, 2023
August 28, 2023
As the song goes "You were always on my mind" and still are even with the passage of time. I had it figured we would be growing old together, still talking about the issues of the day and carrying on with our great traditions, but.... And, I must admit my passion needle for pheasant hunting has slipped a little more than it has for fishing. While I try to maintain our traditions it is becoming more challenging especially as the circle of friendships diminishes. There is no doubt you wouldn't let this happen! I often ask myself what would Barry's sage advice be on a variety of issues at this point in my life? You will always be my best friend!
August 28, 2022
August 28, 2022
Missing you today and every day. You will be forever missed, my love!
August 28, 2022
August 28, 2022
Like a video in my head it all began early this morning on this day of remembrance. There were so may flashbacks, memories and highlights of my life with Barry I couldn't begin to count them all. Our times together and with friends were innumerable filled with shared experiences, laughter, solving the world's problems or the issue of the day whether it was something personal or very important like where should we begin the hunt or start fishing (HA!).

As each year passes I feel even more blessed to have share so many of life's experiences with him, but do wish we could have traveled down the trail of life together for a few more years. There are moments of immense emptiness for me knowing he won't be involved with our annual outdoor adventures or I can't give him a call. Somehow I press on by recalling the good times and retaining the belief that someday we will be together again.

Gordy
August 28, 2021
August 28, 2021
It has been six long years without the B-man and the hole in my boat is still there. My South Dakota trips to Akaska are still on the calendar which means the annual pheasant hunt in October is just around the corner. These trips are when my heart is the heaviest as we gather in the "cabin" after a day of fishing or the day's hunt. My memories of our times together are like a fast moving video etched in my brain. We continue to share memories of Barry, especially his notorious one-liners that still make us laugh. And, of course we tip a few as we fight back the tears. I think he is still pulling some levers as the pheasant hunting never has been nearly as good as it was when he was with us. Brother Mark and I will carry on the traditions we shared with the Grote brothers (and friends) as long as we are vertical and taking on nourishment! Hoping Barry's family have found some peace as they press on without him, I remain cousin Gordy.
September 1, 2020
September 1, 2020
It's hard to believe it's been 5 years since you left us. I will never stop missing you, my love! 

Gordy, thank you for your kind words and memories of Barry. Your thoughtfulness means more than you know.
August 28, 2020
August 28, 2020
I move through this day with a heavy heart as I remember my dear friend and life time buddy. When I see the contrails in the sky my mind is flooded with years of memories of our good times together. I continue to carry on our great traditions of hunting and fishing even though it isn't the same, but I know he had a big smile on his face when he learned brother Mark is now the proud owner of his beloved Akaska cabin. Of course he will always have a seat at the beautiful table he made as it is still the center piece where we gather each night during our annual trips to Akaska. The memories we share including the infamous Barry one-liners always bring a great deal of laughter along with a few tears. And, of course yet another toast to his memory.
August 29, 2019
August 29, 2019
Gordon Milbrandt, you and Barry were cousins and best friends your entire lives. I know you miss all the good times you shared for so many years. We have all gone on with our lives, but there is that empty chair at the table, the missing husband, dad and papa on our family outings, the missing man on the fishing and hunting trips with friends and family. The list goes on and on, but he would want us to go on with our lives, which is easier said than done!
This quote says it all, "Grief never ends but it changes. Grief is not a sign of weakness or lack of faith, it's the price of love". 
Thank you for your tribute to Barry, which means so much to all of us!
August 28, 2019
August 28, 2019
My tribute this year is identical to last year’s. I miss him greatly, not a day goes by without thinking about him. My hunting and fishing trips to SD are still a tradition, but are not the same. His spirit is with me as I feel a nudge on what direction to go while chasing the wily rooster. Stories about the B-man continue to emerge as we travel the dusty roads and rough Lake Oahe waters. And, while having a cool one at the end of the day the the spirits of our beloved buddies hover in the room.
September 5, 2018
September 5, 2018
Thank you so much for sharing your memories of Barry. It was such a surprise to see your message. How very thoughtful of you!
August 28, 2018
August 28, 2018
I don't think a day goes by without thinking of the B-man and all the great times we shared together over the years. It is a crisp morning and fall is in the air. It is the time when we'd be planning the annual pheasant hunt so memories are particularly strong right now. I must say as time moves on the realization he was a big part of my life becomes abundantly clear. I will move through this day with a heavy heart thinking about the Great One!
August 29, 2017
August 29, 2017
It's been 2 years since you left this earth. I miss you every day, and my heart is still broken in a million pieces. Grieving never ends, but I'm trying to go on without you. I hear your voice when it's hard to go on. You are one of a kind and I am blessed to have had you for a best friend and the love of my life for almost 50 years. You would be so proud of your granddaughters. Aurora is your "mini" and I think of you whenever she and I interact. She's a quiet girl and humble, just like you. She's only a 9th grader and is taking physics, chemistry, and advanced math and science classes. Her science, technology, engineering and math charter high school is looking at moving her to 10th grade. Chloe is still passionate about her ballet classes and was offered a full summer scholarship to study in New York this past summer. She is Cheri's "mini" and you would be so amazed at her progress since you left us. Our little Mila is Chaille's "mini".  She has started kdg. and is oh, so much fun. She is constantly on the move, dancing, singing, and drawing. She loves her new school and teacher. Oh, how I wish you could be here to watch our little girls grow, however somehow I know you are with us all in spirit! Love you forever, Barry Grote!
January 14, 2017
January 14, 2017
I remember a classic American man full of good spirits, wits, and stories, and good looking too!. We met over Busch Light and Chips and Salsa at your crystal lake home. The ladies of the house were asleep and the young Frenchman sitting across from you that I was, was intimitated and respectful. you ended up being my first American "dad".I admired your honesty, and how humble you were. The 1971 Oldsmobile 442 that would roar in its rusty glory from your driveway, the cabinets in your garage, and your classic uniform consisting of 505's, a white shirt, and New Balance running shoes and some of your classic man phrases that are still with me today. So much love, wisdom and kindness hidden in your words.
my Condolences to Janice who was so sweet to me, to Cheri and her Family, Chaille and Craig and their daughter. I know you have suffered a tremendous loss. I am so sorry.
The pictures are so moving...
Barry, fly high out there in the Afterlife, the real life. We shall see each other again.
October 1, 2016
October 1, 2016
October 15 is the pheasant opener and is the third year of pheasant hunting without my buddy. We hunted together ever since the ninth grade. His birthday was also the first day of waterfowl hunting. So many great hunts, stories and memories. As our numbers dwindle I will do my utmost to carry on our tradition and relive the best of our times together.
April 18, 2016
April 18, 2016
I am very late in receiving this news but don't want to miss expressing my sadness. Barry was a sweet soul.
April 18, 2016
April 18, 2016
Thank you to the many family members and friends who have contributed to this memorial website for Barry. I continue to read them over and over and hold your words close to my heart. It's not too late to add your reflections of Barry in this memorial! I cherish every word! Thank you, from the bottom of my heart!
October 4, 2015
October 4, 2015
What a beautiful celebration of life on Friday. We are honored to have been able to be there to celebrate Barry's life. We are so sad he is not here on Earth with his family and friends anymore, but so lucky to have known him, even a little. He was always so welcoming into his home and so generous. He was always someone you could count on for a smile and good cheer. Robert and I didn't get to spend too much time with Barry, but will always remember him as a kind, generous, and happy man. The world has truly lost a "great one."
September 28, 2015
September 28, 2015
Sometimes there are just no words...That's when only prayer will do.
Please know you are in prayers and thoughts.
September 24, 2015
September 24, 2015
I’ve tried several times to write a tribute to my dear, handsome brother, Barry. I can’t even get the words out………..let alone look at his beautiful pictures……..…..it is incomprehensible to me that he is gone……..I know his suffering is over and he is with our beloved parents, our dear sister Connie and other family members in heaven, but it is so hard for us to bear this loss………you are truly missed, big bother…………now we patiently await the big Grote/Milbrandt reunion when we will all be together in Paradise………….until then, God Bless you, Barry
September 20, 2015
September 20, 2015
When I went to Simmons Jr. High in eighth grade, I met Barry and Gordy and three of us began a friendship that would last throughout our lives. It's hard to pinpoint just one special memory I have of Barry because there were so many--rabbit hunting, fishing, hunting geese, and just shooting the breeze. Barry was very clever and funny! We shared a lot of laughs and fun times over the years, but there were also serious moments. Barry was a lot of things: devoted to his family, aviation instructor, pilot, and handyman. These are all things to be admired, but he was something else as well--one of the best friends I have ever had and I will miss him more than I can say. I would like to extend my deepest sympathy to Jan, Chaille, Cheri, and grandchildren. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
September 19, 2015
September 19, 2015
I was extremely fortunate to get to know my cousin better these past years. We had some of the greatest times together. Fishing, hunting, and just hanging out. A terrific person; will miss him a lot. God bless his memory.
September 16, 2015
September 16, 2015
Barry was always larger than life to me. When I was just a little kid in Pierre, I couldn't wait for Barry to come over with all the cool stuff he was working on like hand-made fishing jigs and decoys. It was absolutely the coolest that he was an airline pilot too! I can't believe he is no longer with us, but but glad he is with God now after such a difficult fight over the past several months. Love, Chase
September 16, 2015
September 16, 2015
Rest in peace dear cousin and friend. May you watch over all of us until the time when we meet again in Heaven. Sending love your way. God bless you and your family.
September 14, 2015
September 14, 2015
I had the pleasure of meeting Barry in Akaska on the annual hunting and fishing expedition. I was invited by Gordo to experience Akaska and its unique pleasures. One of the best things was meeting Barry. He was always calm and in control. I believe that is why he was such a great pilot. I watched him take apart a shot gun, with a lot of pieces, to clean and lubricate the gun. He actually got all the pieces back in the gun and it worked better than before he touched it. His chuckle was unique. He was truly unique. He had a great perspective on almost everything. He will be missed. He can't be replaced just remembered.
September 12, 2015
September 12, 2015
Growing up, I didn't really know Barry, his being "one of the older boys" but I stayed with him for awhile when Chaille was a baby. i grew to know him as a generous and kind man, with a sense of humour that never quit. One of the things I will always remember is Jan telling me that she and Barry sat down and agreed to treat each day full of love and never-ending. So I tribute this to Jan and Ba
rry, The Greatest Love story of all time. Love you big brother, you will be missed.
September 12, 2015
September 12, 2015
I pray for your comfort and peace in this time of separation from Barry. Also wanting to share a little something about him. My name is Kathy Milbrandt Cohen and my father and mother were Melvin and Irene. When we visited Grandma and would be at the house on the lake, we got to be with the cousins we never saw because we lived so far away in Pensacola, Fl. I had always remembered the name Barry and the young man who owned it. I thought he was sooooo handsome and loved the name. So, when I had my second son, I named him Barry. Having a large family like we do, it is hard to find a new name. I chose Barry for my son's name and thought if he was half as handsome as cousin Barry, he would be all right. There was something about cousin Barry that had stuck in my mind all these years. God bless him and you and yours.
September 10, 2015
September 10, 2015
I didn't have the opportunity to spend a lot of time with Barry these past many years, seeing him now and then in Aberdeen during pheasant season. It was always a treat to be around him, to chuckle at his great sardonic humor, to exchange opinions on a variety of subjects, and to recognize and appreciate a fellow, true liberal among the den of conservatives comprising the peer group we hunted and argued with.

It was in 2009 that I first became aware of another side of Barry, the compassionate caring person hiding behind the intellect and impish grin. Shortly after having been diagnosed with blood cancer, I received a card from Barry encouraging and challenging me. This from a friend I had seen but a dozen times over 50 years. I suspect Barry would be the first to recognize the irony of that situation, me surviving my encounter with the evil malady and him succumbing. Here's to Barry,
a true friend and as fine a person as I have had the privilege to know.
September 10, 2015
September 10, 2015
Barry was a first cousin, but truly a brother - some thought we were. Growing up on the same block we did it all together, our experiences will be with me forever. Countless memories are indelibly etched in my mind. We shared time in college, both served in the Air Force, spent a few great years in Pierre, SD together and continued to be with each other throughout the years mainly enjoying our favorite activities of hunting and fishing. Throughout it all he was the same ol' Barry, very modest; you'd never know he was an Air Force instructor pilot and flew many different types of aircraft with Eastern and United Airlines. He was very calm, a deep thinker, problem solver and a gifted teacher with a great sense of humor. When I saw him right after surgery removing his eye, he said to me "Don't worry Gord and I can still out shoot you". He taught me a lot! Beyond noted talents he could draw or sketch most anything, most notably Beetle Bailey and fighter aircraft. We shared life's ups and downs. He was a caring, wonderful family man and a true buddy. Without him the rest of my life will never be the same; I am having Don McLean's American Pie moment.
September 9, 2015
September 9, 2015
The love in your family is a tribute to God's love for us all. Peace be with you Jan, Chaille and Cheri. Our prayers are with you and Barry.
September 9, 2015
September 9, 2015
Barry and I met and fell in love during our first year of college. I didn't think I could ever love him more than the day we married in 1965, but after almost 50 yrs. of marriage, I discovered real love when I sat by his bedside as he tried so hard to fight cancer. At the end of his life, he couldn't speak, but I told him over and over how much I loved him. Sometimes he would mouth the words, "I love you, too" and that's when I discovered the meaning of true love. He was the love of my life and my best friend for almost 50 years, and for that, I will be eternally grateful!
September 9, 2015
September 9, 2015
Pease be with you big brother in heaven. My lifelong hero from the time we shared a bedroom with donnie., Thru your college years where I followed in your footsteps in civil enineering , thru your adult life where you always conducted yourself with dignity and compassion. To right now. Watch over us Barry, and God Bless you. Sending Love your way.
September 8, 2015
September 8, 2015
Barry and I seemed joined at the hip through his Air Force adventure. We went to pilot training together, were instructors together, hunted ducks and deer together, toured breweries together, and watched our families bloom together. We both had wicked, sarcastic, heartless wits, which were scorned by our wives and feared by our friends. Most of our best memories are left untold, but were simple and joyful. He loved his wife, and daughters with a sincere, unspoken passion. Barry was a cynical optimist, in the best sense of the term. He was a fighter right up until the end. I would gladly have shared my remaining years with him. 
Time cannot erase what memories have made with this man.

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Recent Tributes
August 28, 2023
August 28, 2023
Thank you Gordy and Terry for sharing your memories of Barry today. It meant so much to hear from you today. It's also Chaille's birthday so an emotional day for our family. We will celebrate Barry on his heavenly birthday, Oct. 1st. Thank you, once again for your thoughtfulness1
August 28, 2023
August 28, 2023
Well, I was doing OK until John Denver "You fill up my senses." All those happy pictures of Jan and Barry, and family, and ducks, and antelope, and fish, and airplanes. Barry and I shared adventures back in his Air Force days. We rejoiced over each others new babies, hunted semi-successfully in Oklahoma, and had flying stories I still enjoy re-living. It seems so unfair, looking at all the photos of his life, that I am still enjoying these things, and he has been gone eight years. It is comforting to know that some day we will be able to do it all again, forever.
August 28, 2023
August 28, 2023
As the song goes "You were always on my mind" and still are even with the passage of time. I had it figured we would be growing old together, still talking about the issues of the day and carrying on with our great traditions, but.... And, I must admit my passion needle for pheasant hunting has slipped a little more than it has for fishing. While I try to maintain our traditions it is becoming more challenging especially as the circle of friendships diminishes. There is no doubt you wouldn't let this happen! I often ask myself what would Barry's sage advice be on a variety of issues at this point in my life? You will always be my best friend!
Recent stories
October 1, 2023
This picture, posted by daughter Cheri,  was taken at our friend Charlie Johnson’s place 30 years ago when we were 50 years old. As I right this I am sitting with our good friend Charlie remembering our dear friend Barry on his birthday.  I turned 80 on 13 Sep & Charlie on 21 Sep.
Barry’s b/d was always on the opening day of waterfowl season, one of our hunting passions.

We miss you buddy, but never forget you.


Call my name

September 15, 2015

 

         Should You Go First
by Albert Kennedy "Rosey" Rowswell

Should you go first and I remain,
To walk the road alone,
I'll live in memory's garden, dear,
With happy days we've known.
In Spring I'll wait for roses red,
When fades the lilac blue,
In early Fall when brown leaves call
I'll catch a glimpse of you.

Should you go first and I remain,
For battles to be fought,
Each thing you've touched along the way
Will be a hallowed spot.
I'll hear your voice, I'll see your smile,
Though blindly I may grope,
The memory of your helping hand
Will buoy me on with hope.

Should you go first and I remain,
To finish with the scroll,
No length 'ning shadows shall creep in
To make this life seem droll.
We've known so much of happiness,
We've had our cup of joy,
And memory is one gift of God
That death cannot destroy.

Should you go first and I remain,
One thing I'd have you do:
Walk slowly down that long, lone path,
For soon I'll follow you.
I'll want to know each step you take
That I may walk the same,
For some day down that lonely road
You'll hear me call your name.
This poem was sent to me by hospice I hope you will find great comfort from it as I did :Love Laurie and family

 


 

 


Barry's dream

September 9, 2015

When Jan found out that Barry's dream was to fly.  She put all her efforts into helping him to realize his dream. I think she then became the wind beneath his wings. What a partnership.

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