Cristy used to follow me everywhere, I used to call her my "tail", she would cry and still, follow me everywhere!  We got our first apartment together, she was three years younger than me, she used her half of the rent money to buy a diamond bracelet!  She loved to be trendy, she used to raid my closet, she and I used to love to go out dancing, and we loved living downtown on Pearl street in Denver, CO.  When Cristy met her first love, she moved away, I remember I felt so alone, my partner in crime was all gone, I think back, and would give anything to have her back, I try to pretend that she just moved away, and that she is not dead..... I can't describe the pain that has taken over my mind, my spirit, my soul... My everything.... I think of her children, and the pain they feel, I look at my children, I can't help but feel guilty that I am here and she is not, I get to hug my children, I can see the sunsets, I can hear the ocean, I can see beautiful Christmas lights, my poor sister can't do any of those things... Never ever again...