Dear Mary,
I was just looking into some old things from Colorado State, and I was saddened to discover that Dave, your husband and my graduate adviser, had passed away. Late as it may be, I wanted to reach out to you and your family and express my condolences.
I entered graduate school in the Fall of 1985. When I met Dave for the first time, my first thought was: "My graduate adviser is Kenny Rogers!" David was an outspoken faculty member who said what was on his mind, but to me, he was ALWAYS gentle and supportive. He always had a smile on his face and a joke to tell (though most of the jokes cannot be repeated here). David always took his work seriously, but he never took himself (or anyone else) too seriously.
I am the son of a factory worker, and I am the first person in my family to attend a four year college. So, when I entered graduate school, I lacked confidence in myself and I wondered whether I was smart enough for graduate school. David never questioned my talent and made me feel like an equal from the first day I showed up at CSU. I am now the Director of a Neuroscience Program at Stonehill College near Boston, MA. I am now in a position to influence other young people who may lack confidence in their abilities. I remember well how David treated me, and hopefully, I treat my students the same way and inspire them to reach their full potential. So, in this way, David's legacy lives on through me and through his other students. It is clear to me that David valued his family more than anything in this world, but he also was just as supportive to all of his students at CSU. I am sure I speak for all those students who had the good fortune of having him as a mentor. I wanted you to know this, and I wish you and your family all the best.
Most sincerely,
John McCoy -------------------------------------------------

THIS MORNING I WOKE WITH NOT ALOT TO SAY
 I FELT WEARY AND CONFUSED AS THOUGH I'D LOST MY WAY
AS I LISTENED TO THE QUIET MELODY OF THE NEW DAY'S SONG
I COULDN'T HELP BUT FEEL AS THOUGH THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG
AND THEN IT CAME TO ME IN MY NERVOUS STATE THAT MAKES ME
FEEL STRUNG OUT.......
IT WAS A YEAR AGO TODAY THAT BROUGHT THIS ALL ABOUT
TODAY, OH TODAY...A YEAR AGO, YOU STARTED ON THE ROAD TO HOME
AND ALTHOUGH WE WERE WITH YOU, YOU HAD TO GO ALONE
LIVING WITHOUT YOU HERE AS TAKEN US UP AND DOWN
WITHOUT OUR ROCK HERE WITH US, WE STAND ON SHAKEY GROUND
WE KNOW WE MUST MOVE FORWARD BUT STILL SO SAD YOUR GONE
WE TRY TO HONOR YOUR WISHES AND HAPPILY CARRY ON
 I KNOW SOME DAY I WILL EMBRACE YOU AGAIN AND NOT FEEL SO ALONE........BUT THAT DAY WILL WAIT FOR US UNTIL I START MY ROAD TO HOME 

Hiking and camping were our great joys as a family.  All the preparation, the packing, the pre-cooking, and traveling to our camp spot , and then setting up our camp are wonderful times I will never forget.  Shelly and Matt were always so excited, and loved the hikes, all the animals we saw, and Dave loved teaching them about being outdoors in the mountains - how to build a fire, how to cook on a fire, how to rig up a shower, how to fish in the lakes; how to make a walking stick, and how to enjoy and appreciate the nature all around us. 

Enjoyed dinner with wonderful friends at Henry's Pub in Loveland. 

Cherished Memories.

     I remember when I was in seventh grade and my dad was really pushing me to get good grades.  He promised me that if I could get straight "A's" for a semester; he would take me to dinner at a fancy five star French restaurant.  As he anticipated, I worked very hard and received all "A's" the following semester and as promised, my parents took me to dinner.  We went to a tiny restaurant that was tucked away in the foothills outside of Boulder, Co. As my mother, my father and I drove to our much anticipated destination;  I remember feeling very grown up and very special that I had made my dad so proud of me.  We discussed the importance of setting goals and achieving them...... and self-worth.  As we drove up the winding canyon and into the evening, I remember wondering what to expect at a fancy French restaurant.  When we arrived at La Chaumiere, there were deer and rabbits and all sorts of birds hanging around the entrance to the place.  It was a late spring evening and I remember smelling choke cherry blossoms and noticing that everything was very green.  We all went in to experience a very fine meal.  I ordered escargot and fillet Mignon and some very decadent French dessert.  I was even served my very first glass of wine!  My parents and I talked and ate as we gazed at the wildlife outside a huge picture window of the tiny restaurant.  I remember thinking how lovely the French language sounded as the waiter let his words roll off of his tongue.......and I remember my dad making me feel so special as he encouraged me and told me that I could do anything, be anything, go anywhere and live anywhere....all I had to do was put my mind to it.  I can still see the light in my dad's eyes, sitting at that candle lit table, in that tiny little restaurant, way up in the foothills, on that lovely spring evening.  I was my dad's light on that night and I will always hold that memory very close to my heart.

Missing you Dave and wish you were here to share this with me.

     My friend for over 40 years, Dr. David D. Avery, died at his home in
Masonville, Colorado on Friday, December 02, 2011.  Dave will be sorely missed
by his wife, Mary, daughter, Michelle, son, Matthew and his extended family, of
which I consider myself a part.  Dave and I both were only children, but over
the years I called and considered him my brother because I knew  if I called
needed help or advice he would give it to me.  Dr. David Avery, a retired
professor of Psychology at Colorado State University, will also be both
remembered and missed by many of his former students and colleagues.  Dr. Avery had conducted research and published numerous articles on Physiological
Psychology.  He was also a textbook author and an author or co-author of
numerous chapters in edited scientific textbooks.  Dr. Avery epitomized the
“scientist/professor" model.  He was a rigorous scientist who enjoyed teaching
and training both graduate and undergraduate students.  Dr. Avery was all about
conducting ethical research and explaining empirical data as the basis for the
scientific study of behavior.  I cannot begin to describe or explain Dr. Avery's
contributions to his Colorado State University undergraduate students, graduate
students and scientists all over the world.  Therefore I would like to pay
tribute to what Dr. David D. Avery meant to me personally.  
    Dave and I met over 40 years ago when both of us began as students in the
Psychology Ph.D. Program at the University of Houston.  Although both of us had
been undergraduate students at UT, we never met there.  Dave and I met when we both began to work in Dr. Daniel Sheer's physiological/experimental laboratory.  We developed a friendship very rapidly most probably because we both loved sports, eating and drinking Scotch.  Although I was 2 years older than Dave, he taught me many things about “life” because I was a small town country boy and he was a wiser big city guy-By the way, we often described each other in more profane terms--if you get my drift. We both played football in high school—he loved playing defense and I loved played offense-so we had many debates about who was “tougher” and/or “smarter”--defensive players or offensive players.  I think what Dave and I had in common was a extremely strong competitive spirit which served us well in graduate school and throughout life.  Another passion Dave and I shared was fishing.  However, I had never fished in salt water along the Texas Gulf coast before I began graduate school at the University of Houston.  Dave taught me how to catch red-fish, trout and flounder when other fishermen around us were not catching fish.  Dave had some funky names for baits, flies and rigs we used when fishing such as the “UT fly” and the
“Longhorn Spinner,” which as you might expect involved the orange and white
University of Texas colors.  I “taught” Dave how to play Contract Bridge and we
became a winning team in the graduate student “lounge” and the UH Student
Union.  Because of our success as a team, Dave and I decided to write a
programmed text on Contract Bridge.  However, we dropped our plans for this book when our wives, Mary and Maurine, beat the Bill & Dave team repeatedly when we played against them on the weekend.  Dave and I learned to play shuffleboard in the bars down on Navigation Blvd. with the dock and refinery workers and we actually won quite a few beers betting on this game.  We really didn’t get into any fights over this game because as Dave would say, “Bill could talk and laugh his way out of any argument.”

     After Dave graduated from University of Houston(UH) and completed his
post-doctoral fellowship, he joined the Psychology faculty of Colorado State
University in Ft. Collins, CO.    I completed my Ph.D. a year or so earlier and
joined the Psychology faculty of Texas Tech University in Lubbock, TX.  Maurine
and I and our children, Alicia, Melanie and Marty and Dave and Mary and their
children, Michelle and Matt, visited each other at least once a year and went
camping and fishing together in Colorado and Wyoming.  Dave and I taught our
children about tracking deer, elk, cougar, moose and bear in the Wind River
Mountains of Wyoming.  Dave even told our children that the Indians, native to
these Wyoming mountains where we were camped would pick up a deer pellet (i.e., poop) and bite down on it with their teeth to tell how old the deer tracks
were.  Our children were all spellbound by the stories that Dave would tell as
we sat around the campfire in the evening.  Dave “guided” me where to fish in
Boulder Creek to catch a 7 ½ pound rainbow trout on a fly rod.  Dave and I
taught our children how to catch, clean and cook trout in the mountains over an
open fire.  Dave was the leader in teaching our children to know and follow fish
and game laws, conservation, and respect for the environment.  When Dave, Mary, Michelle and Matt visited the Landers home in Lubbock, TX, we would eat, drink and laugh a lot.  Since Maurine and I played the piano and guitar, all of us
would sing and play songs from John Denver, The Kingston Trio, Jim Croce and
the Oak Ridge Boys.  Our children, Alicia Landers, Michelle Avery, Melanie
Landers, Matt Avery and Marty Landers would put on nightly shows after supper. 
These “shows” were made up by our children and consisted of them putting on
strange “costumes” and singing, dancing and playing the piano and flutes.  After
we finally got all of the children off to bed, Dave, Mary, Maurine and I would
sit up half the night and drink and laugh and talk about the “good old days”
when we were young and poor graduate students. 


     There are many other things I could share with you about my “Best Friend
Forever”, David D. Avery, but I’m going to “wrap it up” for now.  Dave was my
brother, which biologically I didn’t have!!  He was a mentor to me on many
things and sometimes my alter ego.  I will never forget all of the things he did
for me and my family.  I just hope and pray that he’s in a place where he won’t
be suffering physically, has plenty of fish to catch and cook, and a never
ending supply of golf balls to drive down the course. 


Good-bye, Dave!!  I’ll never forget you as long as I live!!

 

My first Christmas without Dave and I am remembering all the fun we had with our families over the years at Christmas time.  Dave always cooked a beautiful prime rib dinner on Christmas day. On Christmas eve, we would have lots of fun snacks, soup or chili, followed by each of us taking our turns to open presents.  Dave would always skip his turn and hold onto his presents in a stack until everyone else had finished opening theirs. Then and only then, he would very slowly open each present.  He loved doing this to tease and taunt all of us.  In our early years here in Masonville, we would head to the mountains every Christmas to choose that special tree.  It was always a huge tree to be placed in our living room that has valted ceiling.  We spent hours drinking hot chocolate, and tromping through the snow to find just the right tree, cutting it down, and hauling it home.  Many more fun hours were spent to to set it up, place the lights and ornaments on.  Dave and I would always argue about just how the lights were to be placed on the tree.  Each year, I bought a special Christmas ornament for Michelle & Matt.  We had many happy times at Christmas with Poppa & Tudi and the four of us, and usually with a few extra friends for Christmas day dinner.

Our Christmas 2011 was very different with my Dave not here, and with Poppa & Tudi gone, but I am so very thankful that I have so many happy memories of Christmas's past.  Matt, Tammy, Michelle, Joseph, and I had a Christmas that will add to my happy memories, and I thank each one of them for being with me this Christmas.

I want to share a story about my Christmas 2011. Late in the evening of December 13, my doorbell rang. I didn't answer the door because I was alone and it was after dark.  After a bit, I turned on the light.  No one was there, but on the doorstep was a small present with a note:

"Christmas is the best time of year; Not only for presents, but for all good cheer; So now with love we send to you, The twelve days of Christmas from who knows who? Sorry, but it's our own little version With a couple of changes for a little diversion."     That night my little package was a small Christmas tree, and a pear, with a note: "The partridge, of course, would have cost quite a fee, So all that you get, is the pear and the tree." 

 Each night late in the evening, my doorbell would ring, and when I opened the door, there was no person there, but a little gift with a cute poem describing the gift for that particular day of the 12 days.  I don't know who was delivering these little presents and poems, but it was comforting and I looked forward to the next little surprise each day.  I feel it must have been a little guardian angel trying to keep me from feeling so very sad and lonely.  This angel, whoever it is,  will be a loving part of my 2011 Christmas memories, but in my heart this Christmas- 2011 - will always be remembered as my first Christmas without Dave by my side.

 David Avery was a fine man and mentor to many students. I, in particular, needed his guidance when I was a fresh Ph.D. student beginning in January of 1970. David pulled my bacon out of the fire many times and always stood for the highest level of scientific integrity and professional performance. On a more personal level, David was a great man who enjoyed life and helped others around him enjoy their lives. David and Mary were always warm and friendly supporters to Jo Anne and me. We had many good times in their home. I am forever grateful to David for what he did for me and, I expect, for many, many others. He will be sorely missed.

 I met Dave a few years ago through playing golf; he, Gene Oetting, Hank Cross and I brought the game to its knees (or vice versa) as often as we could. Dave, always the gentleman golfer and one who accepted the cruelties of golf with little protest, particularly appreciated my similarities to Tiger Woods (I'm good at cursing and throwing my clubs). Dave consistently encouraged me to seek greater distance and accuracy with my irons (never mind the ball). But his best critique was for another, who had been playing an assortment of chili dips, banana balls, and worm burners for much of the round (with a new Titleist). Finally, Dave picked up the ball (as it lay in the weeds by yet another water hazard), looked at it carefully, said "You don't deserve to play with a Titleist," and threw it into the lake. The moment was followed by an astonished silence, then gales of laughter, then perennial use of a catchphrase that will long endure. I'm grateful for the memories.

 old friends  From:Early days in Meadow Lark Heights  Tribute:We so enjoyed reading Dave's Obituary --such a fine tribute to a remarkable man. We are honored to be listed as a part of good memories.

Tribute:We were deeply saddened by Dave's death. He was a dedicated colleague and a man who stood by his family and friends through good times and bad. Our long relationship with the Avery family is filled with wonderful memories and we'll miss Dave terribly. Our love & deepest sympathy to Mary, Matt, & Michelle.     Bill & Berny Boyer

After we moved to Colorado in 1969, almost every year the Landers Family would travel up to see us.  We'd spend a couple of days stocking up our vans and trailers with food, camping gear, water, fishing gear, etc, Then, the Landers, in their van & trailer, and us in our van & trailer, and five kids (Melanie, Marty, Alicia, Matt & MIchelle) would strike out for Big Wyoming, (Pinedale, WY) to camp, cook, fish and have loads of fun.  Usually stayed in one camp spot for a week to ten days.  Rigged up camp showers, camp kitchens, and sleeping quarters.  What a blast we had!!  Cooking up good camp food, singing & laughing by the campfires.  Exploring and hiking & fishing during the day and then back to camp to  have a great meal & search the kids and ourselves for ticks! Great funfilled memories with the Landers family!

Good Grades, Great Football, Good Times and Wonderful Memories!

I was his cheerleader, and he was my football star.