ForeverMissed
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Shanghai Bob and your Dad

August 4, 2017

Dear Tracy, You probably won't recognize my name Faith Goldman. I am the widow of the late Robert Goldman who worked with your Dad for 9 years at Air-Sea Forwarders. I had an occasion to go through some old photos of a Surprise Party I had for  Robert in 1990 and our 25th Anniversary Party in 1992. Robert passed away on Sept. 17, 1994, eight days after he succumbed to a heart attack while at ASF. Saturday mornings both he and I went to our "jobs" for casual time with our emplyees. In the previous times when I would stop in at ASF and especially when your Dad helped me with the surprise party for Rob, I always met your Dad with such a broad smile from him. I know Robert respected him so much - they shared various languages and shared their work ethics to the hilt. I am going to a function this Sunday for the Benefactors of the Jewish Club of 1933. Erwin Rautenberg was a major donator to this arm of the Jewish Home of the Aging. I am taking pictures of Mr. Rautenberg and there your Father is with his smile. I don't know if you want these pictures. You can reach me at faithnamdlog@aol.com. Usually my words in writen form are more logical but I'm writing this through tears. My daughter Naomi has written such like stories just as yours. I'm glad you have such wonderful memories. Faith

A story sent by one of Dad's a co-workers...

October 7, 2015

I will share one story about Emil here, hopefully I can tell it correctly.  When I started working at ASF many, many years ago there were a lot of characters in upper management that could be very intimidating.  Of course Erwin was at the top, he had a huge office and when I talked to him he was very gruff, demanding and short.  There were others that were difficult in other ways and then there was Emil who, although not as vocal could be intimidating through his body language, facial expressions, or just the formal way he talked or asked questions.  When I first started and got to know all these managers I was walking on tip toes, just trying to blend in and stay out of trouble.  I was in the Special Projects department and started handling the Fokker accounts which I later learned were Emil’s old accounts.  In fact Emil used to take trips to The Netherlands to visit the various Fokker facilities.  The Fokker business was pretty sensitive as they were shipping a lot of military related commodities that fell under different State Department Licenses we had to procure so I had to be very careful.  It didn’t help either when I found out Emil’s involvement and history with these accounts and knowing he was watching them closely.  I was able to survive for a long time blending in and I got by with the only interaction with Emil was just saying Good morning or afternoon when I would see him at the fax machine….even then I was intimidated.  But, of course one day there was an issue with a Fokker shipment, I don’t remember what it was now, but I was summoned to his office to discuss the issue.  I don’t even think he called me, I was just told “Emil wants to see you in his office”, which was even worse.  I was so nervous.  I went to his office door which was open and knocked and he told me to come in his very formal way.  This was my first visit to his office and I wasn’t even offered to sit down on the hard couch…I wasn’t worthy enough yet.  So I stood at the head of his desk facing him while he continued in his very formal way asking me questions about the Fokker shipment.  And every time I answered he had a follow up question.  This went on for several minutes and I was getting more nervous and I think I started fidgeting with my hands while I talked.  At that time Emil had this nice clock sitting at the head of his desk and the clock had several separate pieces to it.  It was very nice…maybe someone from the family gave it to him.  But anyway after a while my fidgeting got so bad my hands hit the clock and all of the pieces scattered across his desk!  I quickly picked them all up and tried to put them all back correctly but my hands were shaking and the clock was a big mess!  Emil just looked up at me calmly and said “just leave it…I’ll fix it later”…and we continued our conversation.  And that was my first visit to his office which I’ll never forget.

 

But over the years we got to know each other very well, we tackled very tough issues, worked together and became partners in helping ASF develop and move on as Erwin wasn’t able to be as involved in the company as he was in the past.  And I like to think Emil and I became more than business colleagues but friends getting to know each other and asking about each other’s family.  Emil had a great memory with what was going on with my family life and would ask me how things were going in a truly caring manner. 

 

His biggest regret...

October 7, 2015

(Written 9-14-15)

My dad is nearing the end of his life here on earth. While hanging out with me and my siblings, sharing some memories and laughs, and wishes for our future, he said: "You know, kids, I only have ONE regret in life..."

(we all paused, then he continued)

"...that I have outlived your mom for so many years."

We lost our mom 12 years ago, BUT HERE IS THE THING... our parents divorced in 1979! (Mom remarried a few years later)

Of course there were some initial bumpy years, but they remained the best of friends. Dad never spoke a harsh word, acted selfishly, or tried to "punish" Mom for wanting a divorce (in spite of the hurt they were bearing). No matter the circumstances, he has ALWAYS honored her and behaved in a manner that protected his children from any anguish or resentment or loss as a result of THEIR divorce. He is the biggest, strongest, yet most gentle spirited REAL MAN you could ever imagine! 

I cannot begin to tell you how much love and respect my siblings and I (and SO many others) have for him. In these final days, he is surrounded by his adoring children and grandchildren, an abundance of love, and pride and peace... knowing what a hero he is and what a legacy he leaves. THAT is a life well lived. 

To the "boys" out there who hurt their children because they are so angry with their mother, you are robbing their future, and YOURS!

The message here: THE GREATEST GIFT YOU CAN GIVE YOUR CHILDREN IS TO HONOR THEIR MOTHER.

Thank you, Dad, for doing this... for never divorcing US when your marriage ended. I know you and Mom will have some catching up to do, and that the two of you will marvel in all that being a PARENT (and grandparent!) is. Thank you for always enjoying that WITH her, and FOR us, whether you were her husband or ex-husband. I know you will get back to it when the two of you meet again! I love you, and give her a kiss for me when you see her!

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