ForeverMissed
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January 15, 2014

The Sunday after Gray died, I sat infront of the Godwins at church. We sang this song and it gave me hope and made me a little less sad. This has been my favorite hymn since then.

The borrowed angel

January 3, 2014
Gray was most extraordinary guy I've ever met in my entire life. He was a borrowed angel from God. He was my brother. Not by blood but considered him my brother. He was like this light that Jesus let us borrow for 16 years. Then he took him. I always ask, "Why me?" I'm never going to understand why God took Gray. I went into a grieving stage ever since Gray died. I just can't even comprehend that he's gone. When I look back as far as I can, there was never a point that Gray wasn't there. He's been in my life since I was born. He was the most godly, sweet, protective, loving, adventurous boy I ever met. I cry myself to sleep at night. I feel like I'm never going to get through this. He was my go to guy, a shoulder to cry on, and so much more. Life has been hard without him. My life went from an all time high to an all time low. Life on earth just became 10 times worse. Thinking about going to heaven is 1 million times better than I imagined knowing that he's going to be there. I needed him more than sun. I loved him so much. All the fond memories we made will always be in my heart. Every night I sit there and talk to Gray about my day for 30 minutes. I pretend he's a pillow when I go to bed and I hold onto that pillow all night. Tragedy hits but we have to keep going on. It's going to be hard to get back up and keep going but eventually I will. If I didn't know Woodbrae was I knew he was in duckhunting, wake boarding at the lake, or getting surgery on his leg. That was just him. He was so adventurous. He was fearless. I wish Gray could have been longer but it's all Gods plan. I may not like it at first but it's what's best for me and I just have to trust Him. The only way to do that is to stay in the word. It makes you stronger. Gray is with me right now in my heart. I feel him everywhere I go. My thumbs are losing feeling so ill sum it up with. I will never forget you. Not a day will go by without thinking about you. Kill a few ducks for me. I love you so dang much. R. I. P

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