hey mommy, i miss you a lot. im so scared. something happened today... i think im gonna have a p@nic Attack. im really scared mommy. i wish you were here. im freaking out. i dont want to get in trouble. im already in so much trouble. im freaking out mommy. i wish you were here. it would make me feel so much better. im so scared. iloveyou mommy. so much. i wish you were here...<3 Anna <3

Hey mommy. Its Anna banana....again.... The day is going good so far.... thinking about you a lot though.....Goodness there are so many people i would want you to meet if you were here. You would really like them. Or at least i think you would, i dont know what you like. i dont know about you so i can barely say you would like them. You know.... i miss you. i know i say that a lot but i do....I see these girls and their moms. I see how connected they are. I want that. Traci, is amazing. She is so loving. She takes care of me so much. She loves me. I love her. I just wish i had you too mommy. i miss you. i miss us. Alexis was so good when you were here. i think you leaving changed her. It changed me too, she when to the things you went to. I went to lifting. I found lifting as my out lit. OH, i had a meet last, last Thursday! I got 4th place, out of 5 people. I have a meet this Thursday. I have to get beat 2 girls in my weight class. I dont know if i qualify for regional but i hope i do! ive worked really hard! I wish you could see me now, and help me get through those days. I really want dad and traci to come to my lago vista meet. or if i make regional i hope they come, its really important to me. ANYWAYS! im sorry i write you everyday, it just helps a little, you know? I feel like if i write on here telling you about my day or what i am thinking i might be able to breathe and get past it, but i honestly think im not ever going to get past it. I wish you were here, mommy. Iloveyou! <3

I cried today...this month it will be 9 years since you left me... Every day it breaks me to pieces....to be without you... its so hard... So my bestest friend told me today that if i was gone he wouldnt be able to handle it... he lost his mom too... i think thats why we connect so well. Goodness i wish you could meet him... I cant believe its already been 9 years... and i still havent gotten over it...9 years... wow...Goodness, i miss you... i wish you were here.... i think im just still attached to you.. i honestly dont think ill ever be able to let go... i know that sounds bad, but its just how i feel...i loveyou, mommy!

Mommy, i miss you. I miss you a lot. I wish you were here. I wish you could be there at my graduation. My wedding. That´s what really sucks about you being gone. My children will never get to meet you. I cant remember anything about you, but in my heart i believe you were a good person. I believe that you went up instead of down. You were so beautiful. I wish i could remember your voice. I sit here everyday trying to talk to you and yet i only get my voice back. I never can imagine your voice. I never thought i would have to go through life without you. But its life. Im still trying to get over you leaving, its hard. But im trying. I have an amazing step mom. She loves me very much. I look up to her, in some ways. She is always there when i need her most. I used to have nightmares about you leaving me, or you coming to see me, and id be crying in my sleep, she would come in and comfort me. shes super amazing. I think you would like her. I wish i had stuff of yours. i have pictures. The one thing i want is to remember you, which i cant. Iloveyou,mommy.