I haven't visited you for awhile on here, but I do talk to you everyday! I miss you everyday and have no desire to date anyone new. I think our marriage brought me to my knees! I really thought we would be together forever! I am still so confused about how everything went off the train tracks??? Please come see me in my dreams, I miss YOU!!!!!!!

Here I sit feeling the same way I have felt since day one! I don't think my heart will ever heal! I still haven't moved on and don't want to hurt anymore!! Its the most gut wrenching hurt I have ever experienced! I hope you are happy, because I certainly am NOT!! Please try and communicate with me somehow!! PLEASE!!!! I NEED SOME CLOSURE!! I LOVE YOU!

I couldn't figure out why I have been so depressed this last few weeks, until I realized this was the month you passed away!! So many unanswered questions, so much regret !! If I could just turn back the clock I would do and say things so differently! I will always love you !!!!!

JOHN I NEED TO MEND MY HEART,AND I JUST DONT KNOW HOW!!!!!

I AM SO SORRY FOR THE MEAN WORDS I SAID TO YOU BEFORE YOU PASSED AWAY!!!!! SOOOOO VERY SORRRRRRY!!!!!!PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!!!

HI MY LOVE, THERE ISNT A DAY THAT GOES BY THAT I DONT THINK ABOUT OUR LAST WORDS !! I AM ABSOLUTELY BROKEN, I JUST CANT SEEM TO MOVE ON!! I THINK OF YOU DAY AND NIGHT!! I WISH I COULD FIGURE OUT HOW PUT THE PAST BEHIND ME !! I FEEL LIKE IWILL BE ALONE UNTIL I DIE, LIKE I AM UNDESERVANT OF LOVE!! PLEASE HELP ME TO FEEL WHOLE AGAIN !! I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU !!!

I CANT BELIEVE ITS BEEN ALMOST 9 YRS. SINCE YOU PASSED AWAY! I STILL HAVE SO MANY UNANSWERED QUESTIONS!! SOMETIMES THOSE QUESTIONS KEEP ME UP AT NIGHT! HAPPY BIRTHDAY HUN! WHEN I LEFT WASHINGTON IT WAS SUPPOSED TO CLEANSE MY SPIRIT SO I COULD PUT EVERYTHING BEHIND ME! OBVIOUSLY IT HASNT WORKED!! I PRAY SOMEDAY I CAN MOVE ON!! I STILL LOVE YOU EVEN THOUGH YOU HAD MOVED ON EVEN BEFORE YOU PASSED AWAY!! LOVE U SOOO MUCH!!

I will always love you, I sit here on my couch this morning crying like you died today!!! tearsssssssssssssssssss!!!

HUN I MISS YOU SO MUCH STILL!!!! WILL THIS PAIN EVER GO AWAY?????

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOHN, I WOKE UP AT 12:01AM AND IT WAS OFFICIALLY YOUR 51ST BIRTHDAY! U WOULD THINK I WOULD HAVE MOVED ON BY NOW AND STARTED DATINBG SOMEONE ELSE, BUT ALL I SEEM TO FIND IS LOOSERS!! LUV U FOREVER!!!!

I will always love and miss u!!!!!

Hey there my sweet husband, or should I call u that?? I am sooo confused, I dont understand, Its almost like u have a double life that I didnt know about!! I knew we were having problems, but I feel like u just used me the last couple of months to make sure your clothes were nicely pressed and u looked good for your girlfriend!! What a kick in the gut when I ran acrss the pics of u and her!! I truly luved u to the core of my every being!!! And still do!! I am so angry at myself to be so hurt by your passing!! I just need some questions answered!! why wont u visit me in dreams?????

I WISH I KNEW WHY I WAS STILL HERE! I DONT KNOW WHAT THE POINT IS, ALL I DO IS STRUGGLE TO MAKE IT FROM POINT A TO B!! I AM GREATFULL FOR ALL THE GREAT FRIENDS I HAVE IN MY LIFE, DONT GET ME WRONG!! BUT I AM SO SCARED TO PUT MYSELF BACK OUT THERE AGAIN!! JUST TO GET HURT ALL OVER AGAIN!! WHY!!! PLUS I JUST DONT FEEL ANYBODY WOULD WANT ME!! SURE, MAYBE THEY WILL FOR A SHORT TIME!!

I hate hurting everyday!! especially when I think about u seeing someone else before u passed on!! I didnt have a chance to talk to you about the way I felt!! I was so crushed when I found out u were seeing someone else!!!! I dont even want to be here anymore!! But I dont know where I want to go, because I feel so lost!! I hurt soooooo much!!! I need answers, did u send that video to me??

WHY, WHY, WHY, WHY?????? DID U HAVE TO GO???????WHY DID U HAVE TO BE SEEING SOMEINE ELSE BEFORE U DIED?? DID U LOVE HER MORE THAN ME?? DID U EVER LOVE ME???? I FEEL SO LOST!!!!WHY DONT YOU EVER VISIT ME IN MY DREAMS?? IS IT BECAUSE YOU NEVER LOVED ME?? WHY DO I STILL HURT, AND STILL LOVE YOU?????? ITS NOT FAIR!! IT MAKES ME LOOSE MY FAITH IN MYSELF, I FEEL I AM NOT WORTHY OF LOVE!!!!TEARS

Hi my sweet John!! I luv and miss u with every breathing moment! I will never find someone that matches up to you!! It is so hard on the boys not having u here and especially trentin!! U r thier world, and will continue to be! Jeremy doesnt have a relationship left with his father anymore, and is struggelling with that right now, please poke your head his direction occaionaly!

Hi my sweet luv, I am writing this letter to say hi and tell u how much I miss u!! U would think after almost 4yrs. it would stop hurting so bad! But sometimes it seems like it happened yesterday!! Even though we hyad our problems before u passed away, my luv for u was still very strong!! I luv and miss u so much!!!!

I AM SO EXCITED, I WAS ABLE TO SEE YOUR MOM BEFORE I LEFT FOR FLORIDA!! I AM SO HAPPY THAT WE WERE ABLE TO SQUASH THAT UGLY STUFF THAT HAD BEEN BREWING BETWEEN US SINCE U PASSED AWAY!! I KNOW U WOULD BE HAPPY THAT I FINALLY LET GO OF YOUR COAT AND GAVE IT TO RAY AND YOUR MOM TO GIVE TO BUTCH! I AM SO GLAD THAT MY HEART HAS BEEN MENDED THANKS TO YOUR MOM AND RAY!! THEY ACCEPTED MY APOLIGY!

Hi my luv, I havent been on for quite sometime!! I havent because when I do I seem to fall apart and miss u that much more!! I know u are around and hear things that I say because I can sense it!! I wish u were here and with me right now, u would luv it here!! It is so beautifull here, it so reminds me of cancun!! I miss u everyday and every miniute I am alive! LUV U~~~MISS U~~~LUV U~~~

Hun where r u?? I never see u in my dreams, are u really out there?? i need your help in order to move on!! I need to know if u still love me, or if u ever did!!

Happy Birthday, my sweet wonderful husband!!! I love and miss you so much!! I still havent started dating anyone yet! I feel sometimes I am ready but I just cant make that step!! I LUV U!!!!! HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!

where are you, why dont you ever visit me in my dreams?? I still miss u so much!! Please let me know if you are happy!! I need to know if you loved me when you passed away!! I just feel like I cant move on untill I know these answers!! Please help me, I know you have to be around us, please answer my questions somehow!! I LOVE YOU!!!!

I didnt mean you deserve everything you get!! I was hurting so bad because I did not want a divorce!! I loved you soo much and still do!!
Trentin is getting so big, and the boys are doing so good!! I wonder where we would be if you wouldnt have passed away!! I always wonder what happened to your ring, did you throw it away?? That would break my heart!! I

Its been so long since I have visited your site!! It doesnt mean I dont love you and still miss you sooo much, but it makes it a little harder to see you beautifull face!! I am going to be seeing Lishia today I hope you have a message for me!! If you can really hear me will you tell me you forgive me for saying those terrible things I said when we talked last!!

love you any less though!! Some where in my heart when we split I really thought we would get back together!! ITS SO SAD BUT SOMETIMES I WISH GOD WOULD TAKE JUST SO I COULD TALK TO YOU AGAIN AND GET THE ANSWERS I NEED TO MOVE ON! I MET SOMEONE THAT HAS LOST HIS WIFE ALSO. I THINK HE STILL HAS THRE PAIN IN HIS HEART THAT I HAVE IN MINE AND ITS BEEN 7YRS FOR HIM! I LOVE U SO MUCH!!

Hi hun it is 145 in the morning, and again I cant sleep!! I miss u so much it hurts so much still!! When will this hurt go away? Somerimes I wonder if this were you here and me that pased would you be missing so much? I know we had issues before you passed and that I think is what makes things that much harder for me, its the not really knowing where your heart was? It still doesnt make m

I cant believe it has been 3yrs my love!!! why dont u visit me in my dreams?? I want to see your face again. you would be so proud of jeremy, aaaaaaaand bobby hun!! And Trentin is getting so big, but we all miss u sooo much. please visit me and let me know how you are doing!! I so believe in life after death, so I know you are still around us!! I LUV YOU SO MUCH, GOODNIGHT!!

Hi my love, just sitting here thinking of you this morning!! I have another job interview today, I so hope I get it so I can get my own place again!! I am getting Trentin today also, he is such a wonderfull grandson!! You would be so proud, I wish you were here to see, and the boys are both doing so good!! Bobby and Jessica got back together, I hope things work for them!!! well I love you

hey papa i miss you so much  you mean so much to me

GOOD MORNING MY LUV!! WELL I FINALLY GOT 2 DAYS OFF IN A ROW, FROM WORK. I REALLY DID NEED IT, I CANT BELIEVE IT HAS ALLREADY BEEN 3YRS SINCE YOU HAVE PASSED AWAY. I!! I WISH I KNEW HOW YOU WERE DOING!! YOU WOULD BE SOOO PROUD OF THE BOYS, AND TRENTEN IS GETTING SO BIG!!!!! I I LUV YOU!!

HI HUN ITS BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE I HAVE WRITTEN YOU. I MISS YOU SOOOO MUCH I CANT EVEN EXPLAIN IT!! ITS JUST NOT GETTING ANY EASIER, I WANT TO GO TO HEAVEN WHERE YOU ARE SOOO BAD!! IT JUST SEEMS THAT I AM EXISTING EVERYDAY, I GO TO WORK AND COME HOME AND STARE AT TV, WHAT KIND OF LIFE IS THAT?? I THINK I DONT WRITE BECAUSE IT MAKES ME CRY I LUV AND MISSUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAPPY 4TH HUN, i THOUGHT OF U YESTERDAY, REMEBERING THE TIMES U USED TO SIT ON THE PORCH AND VISITING WITH NEIGHBORS WHILE THE FIREWORKS WOULD BE SHOOTING ALL AROUND. yOU LOVED THE HOLIDAYS, I AM SO SORRY I DIDNT CELEBRATE, AND ENJOY THEM WITH YOU AS MUCH!!! I AM SO SORRY THAT I WASNT A BETTER WIFE TO YOU. I MISS YOU SO MUCH THAT IT HURTS DEEP IN MY HEART. IF I COULD STEP BACK IN TIME!!!!!

HI, MY LUV !!!!!! HAPPY FATHERS DAY!!!!!! THE BOYS WERE BLESSED TO HAVE HAD U IN THEIR LIFE , YOU WERE A WONDERFULL ROLE MODEI . I KNOW THEY HAVE A DAD, AND HE HAS REALLY STEPPED UP TO THE PLATE AND BEEN A WONDERFULL DAD AD I AM SO GREATFULL FOR THAT, BUT U ALSO PLAYED A BIG PART IN SHARING THOSE RESPONSIBILITIES!! THEY BOTH MISS AND LOVE U VERY MUCH!!  AND HAPPY PAPPAS DAY TOO!! I LUV U!

Hi hun, I havent written for a few days. I have really been struggling with life right now!!! My living situation has really been trying!! I did get my license renewed so I should start my job soon. I am really glad to hear that Bobby and Jessica has gotten back together. With the lords help and you sprinkling a little bit of your love around maybee things can get back on track. I LUV U!!!

HI MY LOVE, I MISS YOU AND LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MORNIN HUN, I AM SO GLAD I FOUND THIS SITE. IT GIVES ME A CHANCE TO HEAL MY HEART, AS FUNNY AS THAT SOUNDS IT IS HELPING!! IT ALMOST FEELS LIKE I AM JUST WRITING YOU LETTERS AS IF YOU WERE ON A JOURNEY AND WE WILL SEE EACH OTHER AGAIN SOMEDAY, AND ITS NOT SO PERMANENT! I KNOW IN GODS TIME I WILL SEE U THEN!!! TALK AT U SOON, ---I LUV U--I MISS U--ME!!!!!

Hi hun well i just got done with my interview, and I got hired!!I know u were with me in spirit, that is what got me thru it!!  I LUV U AND MISS U SOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HI MY FRIEND, AND MY LOVE, TRENTI CALLED YESTERDAY BUT I WAS WORKING AND WASNT ABLE TO CALL HIM BACK SO I NEED TO MAKE SURE TO DO THAT TADAY. IT WAS SO GOOD TO HEAR HIS PRECCIOUS LITTLE VOICE!! I SURE AM WORRIED ABOUT BOBBY, I WISH U WERE HERE , I THINK RIGHT NOW HE COULD REALLY USE YOUR WONDERFULL INSIGHT! HE IS A GOOD PERSON, WITH A GOOD HEART, SO NOW ALL I CAN DO IS PUT IT IN GODS HAND

HI HUN, I AM GOING TO TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT A JOB TODAY!! WISH ME LUCK, NOW THAT I HAVE GOT BACK INTO WORKING AGAIN , I REALLY ENJOYED THE INTERACTION WITH PEOPLE AGAIN AND OF COUSE THE MONEY DOESNT HURT EITHER!! LOL!! JEREMY WILL BE STARTING BACK TO SCHOOL SOON, I WISHED YOU WERE HERE TO WITNEESS HOW HE HAS BECAME A WONDERFULL MAN!! AND I BELIEVE YOU HAD ALOT TO DO WITH THAT! I LOVE U!!!!

I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I MISS YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I LOVE YOU!!!!!

HI MY LOVE, ONE DAY AND MY JOB IS DONE!! I AM GETTING A LITTLE NERVOUS!! I HAD A HARD TIME AT WORK YESTERDAY, WATCHING ALL THE PEOPLE WALK AROUND LAUGHING AND HAVING FUN! I SO MISS THOSE TIMES WE WOULD DO THAT, I DONT THINK I COULD EVER HAVE THAT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.MY HEART BREAKS FOR OUR GRANDSON RIGHT NOW!!! AND ALSDO FOR BOBBY AND JESSICAS MARAIGE!! I WISH I COULD FIX THINGS BUT I CANT!

HI MY LUV, WELL I ONLY HAVE 2 DAYS LEFT ON MY JOB!! I HOPE THE NEXT TIME I WRITE U A MESSAGE I HAVE SOME GOOD NEWS TO WRITE ABOUT. I KNOW U SAID I NEED TO BE A SPARK, AND THAT IS ONE THING I AM GOING TO START WORKING ON!!! THAT IS WHAT I LOVED ABOUT YOU THE MOST WAS YOUR ZEST FOR LIFE!! IF I COULD JUST HAVE A PIECE OF WHAT U HAD I WOULD BE HAPPY, I LOVE U AND MISS U SOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!

HI MY LUV, HERE I SIT AGAIN, MISSING YOU!! I HAVENT SEEN OUR GRANDSON IN QUITE AWHILE, I SURE HOPE THINGS ARE GOING WELL FOR HIM!! AND I MISS AND WORRY ABOUT BOBBY EVERYDAY!! I AM AT PEACE WITH YOU IN HEAVEN, AND KNOW IN MY HEART YOU ARE AT PEACE TOO!!!!!!!!!!! BUT I STILL MISS U EVERYDAY!!!!!I LUV U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I MISS U!!!!!!!!!!!!!I LUV U!!!!!!TALK TO U SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HI MY LOVE, JUST SITTING HERE THINKING OF YOU!! I CANT SLEEP AS ALWAYS!! PLEASE WATCH OVER YOUR BEAUTIFULL, WONDERFULL GRANDSON TRENTEN, HE IS HAVING SUCH A HARD TIME WITH BOBBY GONE!! AND PLEASE FILL BOBBYS HEART WITH YOUR LOVE AND SPIRIT, HE NEEDS YOUR LOVE RIGHT NOW!! I CANT WAIT TO SEE WHAT IT IS LIKE IN HEAVEN, -----I LOVE U-----------I LOVE U-----------I MISS I-----I MISS U!!!!!!!!!!

I AM JUST SITTING HERE ALONE IN MY ROOM THINKING OF YOU AND WONDERING WHY GOD HASENT TAKEN ME YET?? I MISS YOU SO MUCH IT HURTS!! I FEEL SO ALL ALONE, AND CANT FIGURE OUT WHAT MY PURPOSE ON THIS EARTH IS, AND HAVE A HARD TIME BELIEVING THAT I WOULD BE MISSED IF I WAS GONE!! I MISS U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I LOVE U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I KNOW YOU RE THERE, AND LISTEN TO OUR PRAYERS, AND CRYS OF MISSING YOU EVERYDAY!! TRENTEN NEEDS YOU RIGHT NOW, AND JESSICA AND BOBBY NEEDS ALL THE LOVE YOU CAN SEND THEM!! YOU WOULD BE SO PROUD OF JEREMY HE IS DOING EXACTLY WHAT YOU HAD ALWAYS WANTED HIM TO DO!! BOBBY IS SRUGGLING WITH LIFE RIGHT NOW BUT I KNOW HE IS A GOOD MAN, AND WILL FIND HIS WAY BACK TO US!!! I LUV AND MISS U SO MUCH

tO MY LOVING HUSBAND THAT I WILL ALWAYS LOVE!! I MISS YOU EVERY DAY!! THERE ISNT A DAY THAT GOES BY THAT I DONT SHED A TEAR, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. TRENTEN, BOBBY AND JEREMY LOVES YOU SO MUCH TOO!! YOU WERE THE BEST MAN THAT I EVER KNEW, THAT LOVED LIFE WITH THE FULLEST, PLEASE WAIT FOR ME, I WILL SEE YOU SOON!! I LOVE YOU!! YOUR WIFE DARLENE PIERCE