Eulogy by Suzanne & Cherie Neil
Our mom was born into a large family… the Norwegian Knutson's and the Scotch-Irish Brody's got together and became a wonderful close-knit group with many cousins and loved ones who grew up together in the small town of Wenatchee, Washington... apple country.
We grew up hearing so many wonderful stories about her childhood, growing up amongst the orchards on her mom & dad's ranch.
In the 1940's, she attended the Seventh Day Adventist elementary school, her classmates consisting mostly of her siblings and cousins! She went on to attend Wenatchee Junior Academy, and then boarding school at Upper Columbia Academy in Spangle, Washington, graduating high school in 1955.
We heard endless stories about her double-cousins, and it was wonderful that they remained close their entire lives, even if they couldn't see each other as often as they liked. The family still holds reunions regularly, in Washington and in Iowa, and Joyce had a deep love for researching and documenting her ancestry. She helped assemble family history books, and even wrote a family newsletter to keep everyone up to date. This was a very convenient platform to keep ALL of her relatives informed about her grandsons!
Joyce was one of those brave souls who left home to go away to college, joining her brother in California, and she worked on her undergraduate studies at La Sierra University in the Loma Linda area. Joyce's cousin Marly and her sister Gaydean also moved out to California, and the three young ladies shared an apartment together. What fun these young girls had on their own in the sophisticated town of Burbank, California.
Shortly after that, while working together in the same office, Joyce met her future husband, William Neil. She was the secretary who caught his eye. After a two year courtship, they were married on December 30, 1960 at the Little Brown Church of the Valley.
It wasn't too long after that when they purchased their home in Granada Hills, California, amidst the orange groves. Our dad went to work for Lockheed in the engineering department, and Joyce was a stay-at-home wife and mom. This home in Granada Hills is where they raised their 3 children, as well as her step-son Tim. As a family they experience life and love for the next 50 years. Joyce was an adventurous mom, planning camping trips, beach trips, vacation road trips, family reunions, and would even camp out overnight with us kids to watch the Rose Parade.
In the early 1970's, our father had a debilitating stroke, and our mother was challenged with figuring out how to provide for all of us. This is when she made the decision to follow in her mother's footsteps and become a registered nurse. With three children in elementary school, Joyce worked full time as an operator at Glendale Adventist Medical Center. At the same time, she attended nursing school at L.A. Valley College. We still wonder how she managed to care for her ailing husband and three young children in the midst of it all. She even found a way to keep her kids in private Christian school which was very important to her. During that time, she taught us the lessons of perseverance, strength, and an unshakable faith in God.
During Joyce's 30 year nursing career, she spent many of those years caring for cancer patients at Glendale Adventist Medical Center. She later transitioned into working for a nursing registry, and over the years, probably worked at nearly every hospital in the San Fernando Valley at one time or another. Whenever she or any member of our family were sick, she always knew all the nurses and doctors. She was so adaptable, she could work in any department -- from psychiatry to labor and delivery! She role modeled a wonderful work ethic, and her jovial spirit and laughter brought healing and hope to countless individuals over the years.
One of the most important lessons she taught us, was the importance of laughter. She often said, "If you laugh more you'll be crying less." I think everyone will remember Joyce for her distinct and jovial laughter that was contagious.
In addition to her career, Joyce had many passions. She loved antiquing, and collecting vintage dolls and dishes and quilts passed down from the generations. This was a hobby she shared with her sister, daughters, and cousins.
She grew to love animals, enjoying her precious dog Sadie, her cockatiel Ruby, and her many fish.
She really enjoyed her garden... Joyce has the most beautiful roses that line her walkway and take your breath away every spring. She planted pansies, tulips, impatiens... anything that had beautiful blossoms. She grew her own vegetables -- tomatoes, zucchini, peppers, and loved to whip up a new recipe from her own harvest.
Cooking was one of her greatest passions -- cookbooks for every type of cuisine line her bookshelves, and she was always experimenting with her own original recipes. She loved to bring her specialties to potluck at church, and had something new for us to try every Wednesday night at family dinner.
Our Wednesday family dinner was a special time for us when we stopped our crazy lives, and got together for dinner in the middle of the week.
Another fact that few people may realize is that Joyce was forward-thinking. She was the first person that we ever knew to buy a home computer. People told her she was crazy, but she said, "I think this is going to be big." She was not afraid of technology, and always was fascinated with the latest gadget. That's right, she was a techie, a real credit to her generation. She was the first of our family to explore the internet, send emails, and even have a Facebook page! We had to stay on our toes to keep up with her. Her latest joy was using her bible app on her iPad.
Joyce had many special relationships... of course one of those being with her son, Michael. Losing him 6 years ago was so hard for her, and it slowed her down a bit and kept her close to home... but she still remained connected to her friends and family. Joyce was so grateful to her family, and especially her church family who helped her during that difficult time.
Joyce was surrounded by other wonderful people, like her roommate Esther Castillo. Esther also became part of the family, sharing in our family dinners and birthday celebrations. Joyce often told us how much she loved Esther's company... they would sit out on the patio, laughing and talking about anything and everything. They shopped together, enjoying trips to the market and Costco. They had a special bond and grew to love each other very much. Esther will always be a part of the Neil family.
Another special relationship was with her mailman, Frank Betancourt, who she adopted many years ago as her second son, and he became part of our extended family. They kept each other company and shared the daily neighborhood news with each other. But it was much more than that. Frank truly looked out for her; he became her handy-man, fixing anything and everything around the house for her. He was her confidant, and someone she could call in the middle of the night if there was an urgent problem. Frank was recently recognized on television with a humanitarian award. Joyce was beyond thrilled when a television news crew showed up at her door and interviewed her about Frank. She was so happy to brag to the world about HER mailman and how wonderful he was. Thank you Frank, the Neil family will be eternally grateful.
Joyce had another adopted son, and former roomie, Carl Horner. He and Kristina have been a part of the family for years, and Carl always had a knack for making Joyce laugh. Joyce and Carl loved to tease one another, and shared many great conversations about cooking, current events, and their faith in The Lord. Joyce admired Carl's photography, and even posted his beautiful flower pictures on the church website. Carl, thank you for loving her like family.
Joyce was blessed with many close friends, such as Theda Roper, her grade-school friend who she remained close with all her life. Her family members were also like best friends; her cousins Marly and Sandy, and her sister Gaydean were all so dear to her, and they share countless memories full of laughter and joy. There were many trips taken to visit her sister Gaydean and all the family in Coalinga, and these were always good times and precious memories for Joyce.
Joyce's church family held a special place in her heart. As the church clerk and women's prayer group leader, Joyce's ministry here became a big part of her life and it was so important to her. She dearly loved the women in her prayer group, as well as the many dear friends and elders in the church. We are proud of the many lives Joyce has touched being part of this church's ministry.
We cannot mention Joyce's passions without talking about her beloved grandsons. You never heard a more proud grandma when Joyce would speak of her grandchildren. When Casey was born, she announced to the world the arrival of this perfect little boy. She would literally assault people with photos and regale them with stories of just how smart, advanced, and cute he was, and that he was taking after her!! She was very proud of all his accomplishments in baseball.
When John was born, she created her special nick-name for him, John-John. Once again, she spread the news about another advanced, intelligent, and adorable grandchild.
Casey and John both spent many hours at Grandma's house, learning to cook, learning to make lefse (a Norwegian delicacy), and going with her to church.
Joyce played a major role in John's life, taking him to and from school every day, which gave her great satisfaction to be so involved in his daily life. They went everywhere together, to the grocery store, on every kind of errand, and they especially enjoyed their trips to In-N-Out burger. To sum it up, as John's friends told him recently, "You have an awesome grandma!" Joyce recently commented on how much she cherished the way John ALWAYS hugged her and said, "I love you grandma." Joyce always appreciated the help Casey and John gave her doing chores for her around the house.
It's hard to imagine life without our mom in it, being in the house she loved so much, excited to have us try a bite of her latest cooking creation, looking forward to family dinner when we all could be together. Our mom taught us many things in life: working hard brought the greatest satisfaction on a job well done; when you fall, you naturally get back up to try, try again; and laughter cures just about every ailment.
She was there for our every triumph, reveled in our successes and cried in our sorrows. We admired her strength, her resolve and her deep, steadfast faith in the Lord. Life threw just about everything it could at her and she always walked away stronger, wiser and had a funnier story to tell. She was a home-body of late and we had to coax her out of the house -- she loved to go on more adventures with us. Our latest adventure was when we packed her up and all the dogs and drove a big RV up to Big Sur. We visited family in Coalinga, then spent Thanksgiving in the beautiful redwoods. She loved it and we had so many laughs and now cherished memories.
One of our favorite things to do was to make our mom laugh at something we said. That gave us the greatest joy, to have her howl with laughter, slap my arm and say: "SuZANNE! I can't believe you said that!!" "Cherie, did you hear that?" Already we miss her so much, her phone calls to tell us what mischief Spot and Sadie got into, what she was cooking, where she and Esther were going, or that Frank did something WONDERFUL for her at the house. I will miss seeing her with her grandsons, teasing her, laughing with her and loving her. Her legacy to us is one of immense love for family and friends, and love for The Lord, and laughter......
During her last week with us, we realized she connected with so many loved ones, and that brings us comfort. We wish to express our heartfelt thanks to our family, friends, and the Northridge Church for reaching out to us in love and bearing this burden with us. We long for the day when we will see her again.
