Kat,
I think about you every single day and miss you every moment!! Everytime I think I am not doing well I remember you and youre amazing spirit and grace despite everything you had gone through. I still can barely even talk about you without crying. You will always be my best friend and I am sad we will not be together again for a while but I know youre always near me; watching out for me; enjoying everything you are doing and protecting us all from all the darkness here on the Earth. I have planned to name my first daughter Emmalyn Kathleen because you have meant more to me than anyone and I truly love you. I know youre always around but I cant help missing the shit out of you and wishing i could pick up the phone and hear your voice or see your face... for now for always, your best friend Aubs

Kathleen,

My desk at work faces a window.  Often when I gaze out, a thought of you enters my mind and I think of you.  The distraction makes me lose my train of thought.  After a moment, I think “Now what was I working on?” and instead of work stuff, another thought of you occurs. 

So 2 to 3 times a day at work, I take a walk outside.  I dedicate that time outside the office for remembering you.  I walk along a creek and wetland that’s close by.  It’s a great setting for thinking of you, past and present.  How are you?  Do you visit us?  Do you hear me talking with you?  Remember that time when …. (fill in the hundreds of blanks)

The wetland sometimes attracts Bald Eagles.  Usually one.  Some days there are two.  Is that you and Uncle Tom?  One day, there were 3 perched in a single tree.  Is that you and Tom and Tom’s mom?  Did you finally meet your grandmother in heaven?  The eagles watch me as I walk, even though I’m 200 feet away and not a threat.  Why?  Is that you?

We were only 18 months apart, we grew up doing everything together.  She was my best friend but we definitely fought like sisters.  It seemed like the more we fought, the closer we were because no matter what the fight was about, we would figure it out; each time strengthening the bond.  In recent years, we became more distant but that bond was just as strong.  Some days, she made me wish I was an only child.  But now I’m heartbroken and scared to picture the rest of my life without her.  I don’t want to be an only child, but I no longer have my sister.  Figuring out this new reality seems impossible.  Words can’t express how much I love her and she’ll always be a part of me.

This drizzly morning, I walked in the woods hoping to see the owl and thinking of you, always. The sun is out now and I'm sure there was a rainbow, ever present, as you are in my heart, my dear daughter.
You would have been 23 years old on this day, 11-12-13, and one day closer to your goal of changing your life and changing the world.

Because of you, there will be people you've touched that will help in many different ways, over time, to achieve the second part of your goal. I am certain of this and I will do my part as well. So you see, you have already precipitated change in the world. Please be our angel.

Love, "Mo Ma Mi Ma"....Mom

From Betsy Kenney, one  of the hosts of The Survivor Reality Show, Bainbridge Island version;

"This picture is of Tim Wilder and Kathleen.  I believe this was a "reward ride" in the tube behind the boat, for winning the challenge of eating a raw quail's egg.  They look happy!"

Kathleen loved the day I mixed up chocolate pudding and gave it to her and Nolan to 'paint' with.  We had to take them out and hose them off to get it all off!

I am so sorry to hear about Kat. We went to Evergreen together and she had an amazing spirit. Such a beautiful, sweet girl with so much more life to live. I am saddened that she is not able to continue the greatness she was sure to reach, if she only had more time. I was just looking at this photo of us yesterday, before I heard about the news today.

The photo here is of one of our field trips, and this was at the Seattle Art Museum. Her excitement and positive energy was cherished and appreciated. We had so much fun with her, and I particularly enjoyed exploring the gardens with her (later on that day, on the same field trip) and admiring her wonderful style.

Kathleen was a fierce competitor during the Survivor Games which were held on Bainbridge Island.  She even ate raw quail eggs to win a challenge.  Melody won the contest that year.  Pictured left to right: Melody, Kristina, Kathleen, Brian, Marty and Barry.

Kathleen went with Aunt Karen, a doctor who visited Haiti to help after dreadful floods brought additional haardships to this poor country.  Kathleen was always motivated to help people in unfortunate situations.

Brian

This was taken on I think Kat's 2nd day working at the Mockingbid Society. Every year around Christmas time we spend a day making gingerbread houses to celebrate the holidays. I believe Kat won for "House I'd Most Like to Eat".

Kat & I were invited to a daddy/daughter camping trip to Lake Valhalla in the Cascade Mountains, near the Pacific Crest Trail (PCT).  We'd hike in 5 miles and meet our friends.

Kat & I got a late start.  The trail climbs about 1,500 feet, crosses the PCT, then drops about 800 ft down to Lake Valhalla.  With that grade, it was slow going with full packs.  It was getting dark.  There wasn't any level ground for an impromptu tent spot.  Also it looked like rain.

We were soon hiking by flashlight, looking for a spot to spend the night.  We eventually reached the top, at the PCT.  Here we found a spot to pitch the tent - but it was right on the trail.  Camping in the middle of any trail is poor form, but we had no choice.  Kathleen found a spot she liked.  I pointed to the small sticks and debris ringing the smooth spot.  "That's a sign that this was a puddle not too long ago".  She reluctantly agreed on the less-smooth spot I found, and we pitched our tent.  We slept soundly.

In the morning, the spot she had picked was indeed a puddle.  And there were footprints around it.  Hikers had already passed by us while we slept.  We packed up and continued towards Lake Valhalla.  We met our group midmorning.

We all brough fishing gear, and at dusk, we started fishing for lake trout.  Kat and I are not skilled fishermen, but our campmates were.  They showed us the ropes, and shared their bait.

On Kathleen's first cast, she caught a trout.  I unhooked it, and baited her hook again.  On her second cast, she hooked another trout.  Her 3rd cast hooked a trout.  By now the others left their spots and were flanking Kathleen.  Everyone was fishing from Kat's left and right.  She hooked 6 trout in a row!  Six casts, six fish!  She landed about 9 trout total.  Nobody else caught more than 4 or 5.

[Note:  This isn't a "fishing story" where truth can be a quant notion.  This story is verifiable - I have 4 witnesses.  Just last week, Mark and I were retelling this story while sharing memories of Kathleen.]

We all had some trout with dinner, and more for breakfast the next day.

Kathleen & I hiked out Sunday morning in the rain.  We were told about a shortcut, which would avoid a long scramble across scree.  You can guess what happened - we lost our way.  We bushwacked up a steep hill, which the rain had turned into a slippery ordeal of 3 steps forward, one step back.  Kathleen handled it like a trooper.  She declined my offer to offload some stuff from her backpack.

We knew the PCT was ahead, along the ridge way above Lake Valhalla. And behind, we could see the lake whenever we hit a clearing.  Getting seriously lost would be difficult.  I wasn't worried.  I think Kat tried to hide her concern, and wanted to believe we weren't really lost, we were just looking for the trail.  After about an hour, we reached the ridge.  We found the PCT, which led to the trail back to our car.  Along the way, the sun came out.

It was a great weekend.  Kathleen was very proud she had out-fished the experienced fishermen.  And she had handled a backpacking trip that had some adversity (not reaching camp before dark, rain, finding our way without a trail, etc)

This is a voicemail she left me this past June when she had watched Aidan while I ran an errand. It really grasps her love and kind heart she exibited on a daily basis. I remember listening to it for the first time and though it was so very cute, but I had deleted it. Luckily with iphones you can recover voicemails. I am so thankful so have this voicemail, especially since shes saying she loves me and now i can be  reminded any time that she loves me. Kat helped me more than she'd ever know, mainly with my struggles as being a young parent. She was there before Aidan was born and often watched him for me. They had a special bond, they would do art together and sing and dance. I am glad he too can be reminded of her love for him.

Kat's passing will leave a definate scar. I love her so much. Lately, I have felt like she has been around me, drying me tears, wanting me to smile and be happy as she always was. I know in my heart she is at peace and she is now looking after me as I once did to her. My guardian angel's name is Kathleen Kelsey McCarthy and she is beautiful.

Kathleen has some Indian blood, and has always stayed involved with the culture.  Kat was a major organizer for a Pow Wow held for 3 days at Ingraham High School.  It was a lot of work, but she was so proud of how it turned out.

At some Pow Wows, cameras are frowned upon.  However, this Pow Wow allowed them. 

This was at the Quileute Reservation in Forks Washington. We were taking the course "Art Culture and Spirit". This was one of our field trips. Kat was the focus of numerous photos I took, don't know why, I was drawn to her inner beauty and besides, her ear art was cool. 

Madeline created this video about Kat in 2005.  It certainly makes me cry when I watch it.  Madeline chose excellent music to accompany the pictures.  Especially when "Dady's Little Girl" starts playing....

Madeline, Kristina and Kathleen (L to R) at a WSU football game.

Kristina lost her Husky shirt at Thug Mansion, so she wore crimson to this game.

Rudy & Sandy invited us to Lake Chelan.  Madeline & Kathleen were young, and Mom & Dad thought the trip would be great.

Sandy caught M & K sitting in a crate.  Sandy captured a great moment.

That same weekend, forest fires were sweeping through the nearby scrubland.  There was some tense concern that night for new parents, trying to think of four instead of just two.

The fire didn't get too close that night.  But the next morning as we drive home we saw how close the fire came, and the extent of the scorched acres.

Kat & Madeline were too young to be concerned.  Mom & Dad learned a bit on how to assess risk to our young priceless daughters.....