‘Good’ and ‘bye’, two words, with two distinct meanings, seemingly unrelated. I use this simple compound word every day from saying goodbye to colleagues and staff after a hard day’s work to ending telephone conversations with loved ones. Whether, I am talking to my colleagues or friends, goodbye is synonymous with ‘see you later ‘or ‘catch you on the flip side.’  And sometimes, when I am in a hurry, I often drop the ‘good’ and just say ‘bye.’ An assumption is made that we will see each other again, and thus our goodbyes are lighthearted. But this is not the case, when it is time to say good-bye to a loved one who has passed away and you know that you will never see them in this lifetime again.

I have been blessed over the years with many wonderful people in my life. I have also lost many loved ones and friends, more than I care to admit. What do call a person who is born an uncle, but throughout your life, their uncle status transcended into that of a protector, guidance counselor, a father, a disciplinarian and a friend. Uncle Lawrence expanded the role of uncle far beyond its typical job description. Picking up and dropping off my siblings from school. Attending parent-teacher conferences. Attending graduations, birthday celebrations and many other events in our lives.    Uncle Lawrence was not a perfect person.  He often brought bags of chips home to us that were missing a few chips or a sandwich that was missing the other half. But whenever my siblings received these items, you would have thought that they had never eaten chips or a sandwich before. For us, the most importance thing was that Uncle Lawrence thought about us and cared about us, enough to bring us half of what he had eaten during the day.  Uncle Lawrence was a funny man and was determined to be young forever. He was the one Uncle that could get away with wearing a 2 piece white tracksuit from the 80’s. Whenever he wore his tracksuits – he made you believe that they were coming back in style. Death is a topic that brings us face to face with our own mortality.

Thank God for his blessings and consideration for not letting the end of this lifetime be the end of our spiritual existence. I will celebrate the life of Uncle Lawrence in a healthy way because I know without a shadow of doubt that death came to him because his work on this earth was complete. There is a theory that the etymology of ‘goodbye’ is an alteration of God be with you. I for one, subscribe to this theory. In doing so, my request to the Almighty is that, “God be with you Uncle Lawrence until we meet again.”

Love Alway,

Shella

Daddy your passing is like a dream to me, and I will greatly miss you. Every morning I wake up and try to give you a call but, there is no response. You know how close we were, and how dear you are to me. The time we spent on earth wasn’t enough and there are so many questions I wanted to ask, but, you are no more to answer. Why did you do this? Why did you decide to go too soon my dear sweet dad? I can go on and on with these questions, but will console myself you are in heaven with the great comforter, and there is no better place to be than, with the most HIGH.

You were my hero, the one I called when happy or sad, when I needed some personal advice, which I did not feel comfortable discussing with anyone else. You were a good daddy, soft spoken, a great listener and very understanding.  You did not agree with every decision I made but, supported me. Daddy, did you designate someone else, to feel this vacuum before leaving us? The pain in my heart caused as a result of your departure is overwhelming that, words alone cannot describe.

I thank God for your life, you were strong and brave and fought hard to live but, he alone knows best, the reason for your untimely departure. I thank the good Lord for giving me the strength and the opportunity to take care of you in your sick bed; to feed you, to administer your medication, and to put you in bed. As the eldest child in the family, I promise to emulate your example, and to take care of my siblings the same way you would have done. We will miss you so much!!! Adieu mon pere, may your gentle soul rest in perfect peace until we meet to part no more.

Marie

 As hardheaded as I am , there are few times daddy ever got mad at me; or at least , he could not stay angry too long. He would be smiling again in no time . Not having the opportunity to grow close to my dad, I always thought that he was a typical African man with an authoritative approach of things. I was sure very surprise of the ways he always took the time to listen to me and say nothing for a while. I really think that he was more of a friend then a dad. The role of dad didn't suit him when he came to deal with me at least. He was more of, someone that advises you , but let you take your own decisions instead of imposing.

I loved to joke about his growing stomach and compared it to mine when I was 8 months pregnant; his stomach always seemed bigger than mine  so we joked as I liked to rub it. One of my best memories was when he came down to visit me after the birth of my daughter. We were not on very good terms during my pregnancy and so it was a good surprise for me to see him that day. We had  good times that day and I felt very much loved . I am happy to have spent these passed 12 1/2 years with you daddy and Just as I told you  during our last conversation, I am sincerely greateful for all you have done for me.

 Daddy,  I loved you and will always love you my own unique way.

Rest in peace.

Your loving daughter,

Esther