ForeverMissed
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Where is your happy place?

February 14
When your life gets you down by people, pushing you around, you feel like you keep falling down harder to stand up now,                

Life has ran its course, and you come up, empty handed,

Your finding it harder to find the laughter,
you wonder why your bones are aching?
wonder why it takes longer to get to your destination,
When you look in the mirror  It doesn’t make your day any easier,
Old age creeping in will you ever find fun again,
Life  didn’t turn out the way you expected,

hard to believe people we love can  give us so much, but others we love can take so much,
These people helped shape your life by inspiring you, even the abusive ones made who you are standing here today,

it’s in your hands, it’s up to you, who you choose to further your journey, who will it be? And where will they take you?

now I know what to do, the person that unconditionally loved me, made me smile made me laugh. The times we spent together made me happiest,

taught me to love taught me to care, told me to kill em with kindness, and they’ll come around,
always the brightest star in the room!

it’s my mother face that takes me to my happy place, no matter what I’m doing, no matter what’s going on,

I sit and look at the pictures on my wall, I see the most beautiful face I’ve ever seen, still smiling back at me,
once again, she fills me with the warmest feelings of loving happiness,
The feeling bring me back to how I used to be, 

every dayI take the time to sit and look at her face, so I always start out my day with a smile on my face. 

I LOVE YOU MOM 

A Good Life

December 11, 2021
mother from the moment you held me I felt your love for me, when I was a little girl I remember looking at you telling myself, I want to grow up and be just like you, never taking my eyes off you, 
I remember in grammar school coming home and watching men with big equipment dig a hole for the built-in swimming pool you had put in our own backyard,

every year at Christmas my brothers and sisters and I would sit in front of the Christmas tree to get our one present before Christmas day, every time being so excited wondering what this one  special gift could be  and every time finding five matching pairs of pajamas for each one inside, everything always so beautiful so perfect,
Christmas morning running to the living room where this site made our eyeballs big as saucers that sparkled and shine, there before us was our very own Christmas toy store, big and little boxes wrapped up with bows, rocking horses, fire engines, slides, teeter totter‘s, swings, big wheels, tricycles, bikes, then 10 speed bikes, and even a minibike, as we got bigger so did our bows and gifts cars with big bows and even houses,

by the time I was in junior high I knew how amazing you were raising five kids and buying your first home without any help from anyone,

in high school all the kids like coming to our house, not to see me, they wanted to see my beautiful mom, you always looked just like a movie star, it was about this time I knew I could never fill your shoes

I remember hearing you always saying … if you can’t say something nice don’t say anything at all… and to treat everyone the same be nice to everyone because everybody has feelings you told me the ones that people don’t treat right those are the ones I need to be extra nice to ,and I lived by your words just like you wanted me too,

you open your bar , A truckers no because you wanted to show people that you cared about them near and far,
not one holiday did you miss the bar always looking festive, then you would walk in like you always did with a big smile on your face and open arms, then walked around hugging and greeting everyone not ever missing one, then five or six men would walk outside and come back in with platters full of your home cooked meal, nobody in your bar that couldn’t be home for the holidays was not going without a home cooked meal on that day, it didn’t stop at the holidays either, you wanted to celebrate their birthdays so every third Saturday of the month you would celebrate everyones Birthday in that month ,a home cooked meal of course ,
the band would stop and make an announcement for everyone having a birthday that month to come to the middle of the dance floor there you would be standing with all of your glowing beauty they all gathered around the band started singing the birthday song and the lights start going down and onto the dance floor trays of cupcakes and a lit candles on top for each one, they made their wish and blow out their candles, then I’ll come to trays of kamikaze‘s for everyone,

these people loved and respected you like no other they ever knew, they always talked so highly of you, nothing but nice things to say about you,

when I started working there, I knew just what to do because I wanted everyone to love and respect me just like they did you, so by listening to everything that you said and watching everything that you did, 
I couldn’t be prouder or hold my head higher when these people would tell me
             “you’re just like your mother” 

Thank you for making me ME ! 
 

My Mother

September 20, 2013

My Mother "Loretta" was sitting at the end of the bar, The bartender came from behind the bar to give a Friendly hug and hello, Soon after this man comes in looking scruffy, Bartender politely gets the man a drink, My Mom ask why did you not greet this man like the others? she replyed ,So sorry I just cant he is not very clean and her smells bad, My Mom walk over said Hi am Loretta! gave him a hug, looked at his shirt,said"oh look you have a spot on your shirt,let me get you anther one from in the back, He put the new shirt on then sat down, when the driver next to him pulled a comb from his poket and said"I know loretta and she is gonna love to see your hair combed. The next time he came in He come up to my mom gave her a hug and said"Don't know if you remember me,I came in her one day in the darkest time of my life not feeling I was even worthy of a hug,But you did! you gave me a hug and a shirt,You made me feel welcomed,I cant tell you what you did for me that day. Do you know my mom did not know who this man was till he told her the storie, he looked 20 years younger nicely dreesed neat short hair clean shaven. Down right good looken once again !!!

Missing you

July 25, 2013

 

I miss you everyday I still can't believe your gone. I pass by your room everyday and when i look in I'm always expecting you to be there. I miss our talks and how you were always able to give me encouragement when I was feeling down...I know that I'm going to miss you for a very very long time. You were so caring and had such a big heart.  I LUV YOU AND MISS YOU ALWAYS.................

Legacy of Love

July 7, 2013

A wife, a mother, a grandma too,
This is the legacy we have from you.
You taught us love and how to fight,
You gave us strength, you gave us might.
A stronger person would be hard to find,
And in your heart, you were always kind.
You fought for us all in one way or another,
Not just as a wife not just as a mother.
For all of us you gave your best,
Now the time has come for you to rest.
So go in peace, you’ve earned your sleep,
Your love in our hearts, we’ll eternally keep.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VK6zkMdGOKk&feature=youtu.be 

this is LULU

July 7, 2013

This is LuLu. I just want to say that I am very grateful for the impact Loretta had on my life. She gave me a job when I was having a hard time and I don't think I would be where I am today without her.

Encountering Driver's across the Nation

July 7, 2013

A few years back I stopped at a rest stop in North Carolina, I met a retired truck driver that asked me to give Loretta big hug and a kiss.  Because of her help he was able to retire.  Loretta would let the drivers run a tab, and slip a $100 dollar bill in their pocket to take care of their needs till they collected their pay.  So getting back to California to Loretta's Bar I relayed that message to her.  She was so pleased to hear that "Rusty" was doing well and asked me to go back to North Carolina and give him a hug!  she stated she would love to hear from other drivers that she had connected with just to know how they were doing.  I told her that we would all meet together  again someday.  About a week before her passing I stopped by to see how she was doing as I had many times before.  Her kids said she was doing well.   This world needs more people like Loretta.  I'll see you later at "Loretta's In the Sky" 

Bill Villalobos..."Deaf Bill"   

June 19, 2013

Could there ever have been a more loving and beautiful person? This lady had more love in her heart than all the world combined. She loved without prejudice, she would hug the world if she could. I no she changed many lives and gave a lil something special to everything she did. No man went hungry while grandma was around, she would fleets and fleets of trucks drivers with a smile on her face and it made her feel just as good as the hungry driver that got his first homecooked meal in weeks. She will b missed ever so much.
 Love you grandma, Brandy

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