I only knew her briefly---but she was a delight.

Hi Jay and Family, thinking of Pat today and sending her hugs from Wisconsin!!!!

Eric and Jay,
I am just discovering this now, having had lost contact with your mom over the years. my Mom, Lucille Knoll, was Pat's best friend from their school days, and we lost her in July of 2012, my dad (Merle, also from Appleton) passed away this past November, and i have had Pat on my mind and decided to search the Internet and found this site. Needless to say, I am shedding many a tear. Pat was my personal attendant at my wedding and was such a kind, loving, and generous person, my second Mom. Especially while we lived in Madison, I remember many Sunday brunches at the Whitehorse Inn, and when my husband was in Japan for a summer, she and I spent much time together. Good, good, memories! I'll bet she and my mom are all caught up in heaven. Blessings to you both and your families.

Although Pat has been gone from us at Asbury, geographically, for several years, the news of her death a couple months ago brought home the loss of this woman of true beauty...inside and out! Her face seemed to radiate inner peace and joy...not because life was always easy for her, but because she had the Lord's peace within. Whether singing in the Choir, camping at Pine Lake, participating in a Bible Study, helping in the kitchen...Pat's enthusiasm was evident! She added her zest for life to everything she did. "Just think of it!" she would say in response to something new or an interesting lesson. Oh, her cute laugh!  What a role model she was for all of us. Pat riding a motorcycle....."Just think of it!"

Gentle, kind, loving, strong....all words I would use to describe wonderful Pat. I have many memories of Pat, and all of them are lovely. Her smile and laugh will always be with me. But I am forever in her debt for taking care of me! I was an overwhelmed new mother of twins. Due to medical issues, no one was willing to take care of the babies. But Pat, and another angel nurse, came over once a week to give me a short break. They braved the monitors and wires and showed me true love in action. That was Pat. Love in action.

Perhaps because we were born under the same star as we both shared a birthday on February 4th, Pat and I became instant friends in 1960 when they moved to Madison. Together we help raise each other's children but Pat taught me so much about cooking, camping and dealing with life itself. So many of our fondest memories are of camping trips our two families made to Highbanks, Lake Redstone and Schoolhouse Beach. Pat was the kindest, most generous woman I've ever know, she was the personification of all the Christian ideals that she held so dear. She truly lived the life she believed in. I loved her dearly and will miss her always; if any of us manage to get into Heaven, I know Pat will be there already and she'll have the best lemon bars and chocolate chip cookies waiting.

I was the organist and later music director at Asbury UMC in Madison from 1996-2006, which is where I got to know Pat. I'm so sorry to learn of her passing, but she was a woman of faith and loyal member of Asbury. My heartfelt sympathy to family and friends.

I consider it a tremendous honor to have known Pat. I met her when we were in nursing school at MATC in Madison WI from 1978-1980. She was very very patient and kind and extremely gracious. I know that she had some hard times before I met her but they only seemed to help her be more strong and courageous for having faced them. She was about 30 years older than me but the span made no difference when it came to friendship.  I enjoyed her and learned much from her and appreciate having known her. My prayers and sympathy go out to all of her family.

I feel so privileged to have known Pat and be a "blended" family for awhile. She and my mom were good friends and roommates, and their giggling together is such a fond memory. Pat had more energy and faith in good than most folks...she is greatly missed.

We at Asbury UMC are very grateful for Pat's faithful witness, presence and service to this church as one of the founding members of Asbury in 1962. What a gift and blessing has been to this faith community!

For anyone that's ever met Pat, I'm sure we are all in agreement that she is the most selfless human on earth. She would have given the clothes off her back, her warm bed, the food off her plate (which she did very often) even if no one asked her to. You wouldn't dare give her more dessert, unless you wanted the extra to be snuck onto your plate when you weren't looking. And don't even think about leaving the house without a jacket unless you want to wear your 80 year old grandma's jacket around for the day because she refuses to have one while you don't. Putting others before herself was a constant, and it really makes you step back and wonder if you are doing the same. Luckily, this rubbed off on her son/my Dad, Jay, and I will never be able to thank her for raising such a kind, selfless and humble man that has been my rock in life for the past 23 years. She truly has touched an uncountable number of lives, probably to an extent that she didn't even know. For all of us who have had the blessing of having pat in our lives, I believe that we are all better people because of it. So thank you Grandma for everything, I will miss you and always love you!

I did not arrive in the neighborhood until '67, and was lucky to be informally adopted by Pat, Fritz, Elise, Eric, and Jay shortly after I arrived. To many meals, sleep overs, and daily visits to count. Eric was usually on the working and busy and Elise was my 5th sister. With seven younger brothers and sisters, their home meant I had a place for some peace, quite and great conversations and food. Except when we got home at 1 or 2am or later. "Jay what would you like for breakfast," she would ask when she woke us in the morning with that one of a kind voice she had. Her voice would always make us smile and it did not matter what she said. Makes me smile as I write this thinking about how her voice would sound. And thank you for raising my best man, Jay. He has your kind heart and patients.  Pat, you will be missed by all of us that were lucky enough to know you. You blessed all that knew you.

DONATIONS. For those of you wishing to make a donation in Pat's memory please make it to the Asbury Church, 6101 University Avenue, Madison, WI. 53705, or the Madison School Forest at     
http://www.friendsofthemadisonschoolforest.org/donate.html
Thank you.

Pat was so special to me. As a young girl my parents were neighbors and friends of the Gill family. Being ten years younger than Pat , I idolized her and would walk to school with her every noon. The age difference didn't seem to matter to her and we remained friends throughout the years. When Roger and I lived in Chicago years ago, we and our three children would often see the Koenecke family. Pat was a very caring Christian woman and I loved her very much. May the many good memories help to ease the loss of Pat. Most sincerely and with love,  Alice and Roger

To me, Pat Koeneche was a sterling example of what a Biblical woman should be. She was kind, gentle, nurturing, selfless and beautful. I remember her famiy taking a mission trip to Africa. I remember when she and Fritz taught an assertiveness class at Asbury. I taught Bble School with her when her granddaughter had a broken leg and was on a swing set. She was the essence of faith of our Asbury Church. May God help me be like Pat. Natalie Witte

I have been slow to write about dear Pat. She has been a part of our family life since Peg and Jay and Gary and I started our families. I have sweet memories of so many holidays with our two families. Many years ago, I traveled to Madison with Connor, under age 2 (because he could sit on my lap on the plane) and Theresa 5. We had a great adventure getting to the midwest to visit the Koeneckes. Both of my kids remember Grandma Pat's wonderful house, with the garden in the front yard, with berries to pick and eat whenever they could reach them! Over the years, Grandma Pat was with us during many Thanksgivings, some snow trips, Christmas holidays and of course at Peg and Jay's house in Granite Bay. I was so touched after Peg died, and Pat was as upset and tender as could be. We took a long walk to Folsom Lake sometime after that. We sat on Peggi's bench,cried and hugged in love for our mutual missing of her. Then we walked for hours- the slowest walk in my memory! She had already been touched with Alzheimers,and she was the most "in the moment" person I had ever met. We stopped to look at every flower, to admire every beautiful cloud passing over, and to smell the sweetness of nature all around us. " Aaah, land, do you see this? Just look at this beautiful flower!!!" At least two hours of walking, holding hands, remembering Peg, (yes she definitely did remember her vividly at that time!) and just wandering together safely and sweetly. I loved her laugh, and loved her gentle, caring way, and the way she showed her love to her family, Jay, Eric, Allie and Tyler. Love to her loves now. I miss you Pat, but I am so impressed and inspired by the last message she relayed to her Lavender HIlls friend. "I am so excited about the next steps!" Wow. What a wonderful soul, released and ready for the next great step. Grandma Pat, I love you.
Maryellen (Mimi)

" If there ever comes a day when we can't be together, keep me in your heart, I'll stay there forever." -Winnie the Pooh

Sending my love to Pat's family and friends, her kindness was passed on to all of you. I felt fortunate to have been a part of her life for a brief period during my childhood. Joy and love was always in abundance.

warmest thoughts,
Debbie Houden Stamler

Pat was been a part of my life, for much of my life.
I grew up during the 1950-60"s in a wonderful neighborhood of which Pat and her family were a part. The neighborhood families intertwined and blended together so that we were all made better and stronger and felt more loved.Later in life, when Pat was in her middle years and I was a young adult, we found ourselves attending nursing school together. It was an extremely challenging program (50% dropped out). I was so impressed and amazed by Pat's courage, determination and strength to survive and graduate with an Associate Degree in nursing. During this time, we would carpool to/from class, attend clinicals and study together--we fought our way through to graduation. I will always remember Pat saying, "This must be like what it is to go through the war together". She was my comrade, that was for sure.
Pat was a dear on loving friend to my mother. Hand in hand they traveled through many of life's ups and downs--comrades in life.
With a twinkle in her eye, I can hear Pat say that "Inch in inch, life is a cinch"--a good reminder for all of us to keep a healthy perspective on life and enjoy the ride.
My sincere condolences and with fond memories, Mariel

We were so fortunate to have Patty here with us at Lavender Hills for the past 2+ years. She was such a sweet lady who brought joy to all of us with her sweet smile and twinkling eyes. Our deepest sympathy to you Jay and all of Patty's wonderful family. Patty was so fortunate to have such a devoted son. Thank you for allowing us the privilege of taking care of her.

To the Koenecke Family: So sorry to hear about Pat. Though I didn't know her well, I do remember her being a wonderfully kind and gentle soul. She was a dear friend of my mother, Lois Remitz. Lois was full of tales about Pat being the "hostess with the mostest" -- in short, a wonderful and gracious hostess. In their later years, Pat, Lois, Mary Lund and other friends were invited to Pat's house to celebrate New Year's Eve with dinner and a movie. The celebration usually started and ended early with lots of laughter and "catching up". I loved that they were home in bed by 9:30!  My mom always said that Pat Koenecke was the sweetest person she had ever known. 
My condolences to you all. The world was a better place for Pat having touched our lives.
Katie Remitz (Barber)

My grandma was the most selfless person I have ever met in my life. She would always give up her supper to anyone who would eat it, even though everyone was already full. I feel blessed to have such a wonderful grandmother. She will forever hold a place in my heart and my thoughts will be with her always.

Pat was part of my childhood. So many memories. I always found her to be kind, welcoming and resourceful. A beautiful example of how to live one's life. Her daughter and I were the same age and shared some stories and experiences together. Just so, Pat's bravery showed up so many times in her life with her loses. One memory that sticks out is of my sitting in her living room (I remember a piano being in it). I would take off my shoes because her house was always so clean. She showed off beautiful art. She felt so worldly to me then. I felt larger after visiting with her.

I remember so much about Pat, mostly her unflagging good cheer, wit, and impeccable taste in clothes. But here’s one way in which she changed my life. I remember her telling me (with me checking her story on more than one occasion) that she changed the storm windows on her house, up on a ladder two stories high, well into her 70’s. Never a big fan of heights, I found this image of tiny Pat, high up on a ladder, wrestling with storm windows (and I’m not even exactly sure what those are, but they sound menacing) at once scary and breathtakingly inspiring. So, I kid you not: I think of Pat every time I tremulously mount the ladder to clean my gutters—climbing a mere six feet off the ground--and I tell myself, “You can DO this!” So far, so good. I have a feeling that Pat’s courage and kind encouragement have emboldened many people over the course of her lifetime to do more than they think they could. I feel so grateful to have known her. My sincerest condolences to Jay, Eric, Tyler, Allie, and Pat’s extended family and friends.

To know Patricia was to love her. She quickly endeared herself to her community at Lavender Hills, the staff, her new friends and visitors. She always had a kind, funny and encouraging word for everyone, and they all wanted to spend more time with her. Pat had wonderful recollection and loved to invoke cherished memories of her family and friends throughout her life. She dearly loved her children and grandchildren. She passed through this life with amazing grace and beauty. It is hard to let her go, but she went on filled with joy and anticipation.

I feel privileged to have known her. I agree that the world has lost a bright light, and we are all the worse for it.

So many Wonderful Memories! That wonderful smile and the warm greetings. The gentle voice. The backyard barbeques. The Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner that she shared with us. The wine tasting at Raley's. God Bless Pat. Rest in Peace.

Pat was the true definition of mom; loving, kind, gentle, nurturing. She always had a smile ready to give anyone, even is she didn't know or remember them. I am so glad to have known her. My condolences to jay, Tyler and Allie and all the rest of her friends and family. She will be missed. The world was a better place with her in it.

Pat was among the kindest and gentlest people I've ever known.

Death is nothing at all

Death is nothing at all,
I have only slipped away
into the next room.

I am I,
and you are you;
whatever we were to each other,
that, we still are.

Call me by my old familiar name,
speak to me in the easy way
which you always used,
put no difference in your tone,
wear no forced air
of solemnity or sorrow.

Laugh as we always laughed
at the little jokes we shared together.
Let my name ever be
the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without effect,
without the trace of a shadow on it.

Life means all
that it ever meant.
It is the same as it ever was.
There is unbroken continuity.

Why should I be out of mind
because I am out of sight?

I am waiting for you,
for an interval,
somewhere very near,
just around the corner.

All is well.



Henry Scott Holland
1847 -1918

What can I say. As I try and consolidate my thoughts I realize I will have to do this in stages. Probably numerous Tributes and a few stories. My primary thought right now is how Mom nurtured so many and loved all (animals included).  I don't recall her ever turning away someone in need. I'd also like to mention she spent her last two years in a beautiful facility called Lavender Hills.  Surprise, surprise she became a bit of a favorite with the wonderful caregivers and was commonly known as Pattycakes.  Love you and miss you Mom. Say Hi to Grandpa Gill.