Mommy, today is the day that I would have brought you five or six packs of gum for your birthday. If you were still here I would have gotten you 72 packs since you would be that special age.  I wish you were here to help celebrate mine as well.  You know we both were born this month and I know you would have seen to it that I had the very best birthday I could have. But anyway, since you couldnt be here with me, I went on and had a few drinks and now i feel so empty without you along side me.  I know you are resting in the arms of JESUS, and I know you are watching over me as my guardian angel.  I think you so much and I appreciate the love you gave me for so many years.  I wouldnt change a thing.  I just want you to know that I wouldnt have no god mother, step mother, any other mother there is other than you.  As, I sit here on your birthday, writing all of this to you, now I understand why I tell my kids to give me my flowers while Im alive.  But I know you know just whats going on in my life because lately Ive been having these recurring dreams with you. again, I say HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

I want to take out the time to just say happy birthday to you.  I miss you and today, is a very special day in my heart missing you.  I will always forwever treasure the special times we shared.  I really fell like you are in a better place.  I want you to know from this world, you havent missed anything.  The world is still in its sinful state full of evil and people are killing, robbing, and i dont have to worry about you being a victim.  So, Happy Happy Birthday To You! I would bring you some bullet grapes, but you cant have them.  I want you to be good today OK.  Continue to sing your songs by....I cant remember the artist name.   But I remember the songs in my head!.

Mommy, I remember when I would come to your apartment and you had it so hot in there and I would tell you, I cant come in here its toooo hot, I couldnt breath. so i would tell you i will clean up for you, if i could throw away, some of that junk in this place.  boy you, would get mad as heck. DONT CALL MY STUFF JUNK!. OH, GOSH MOMMY, I MISS THOSE DAYS!...I WOULD CLEAN YOUR APARTMENT NOW AND WOULDN'T CALL YOUR STUFF JUNK, I PROMISE YOU....i would do it in a heart beat.  i want to tell you how much, i valued the love you gave me.  I want to tell you.  I will tell you again.  I want you to understaznd how much I love and need you in my life.  I want to let you know, mommy, I miss you on your birthday.  I hope and pray that I will have to share those special times with you again.  Mommy, I want to clean your apartment.