Hi, I’m Ruth and Bob’s number 2 Son, Mark.  First I’d like to say that Mom truly loved this church, and Pastor Brady, and all her friends here!  On behalf of our family I want to thank you for coming to celebrate my mom Ruth’s life today and also thanks to those who have visited her memorial website and left messages or stories.  

I’d like to start with a poem.  I think mom would like that.  I’m not sure who wrote this but it seemed very appropriate:

Gone from us that smiling face,
The cheerful pleasant ways,
The heart that won so many friends,
In bygone, happy days.

A life made beautiful by kindly deeds,
A helping hand for others' needs.
To a beautiful life,
Comes a happy end,
She died as she lived,
Everyone's friend.

Mom loved everyone.  All people.  Weather you knew her well or not she was always open and loving.  She was curious about you.  If you stood next to her in line, she’d strike up a conversation.  If she went to a function of some kind, a picnic or a banquet, she’d know everyone around her by the time she left.  She wanted to get to know you and she wanted you to be her friend.  She always had room for more friends.

 And she wanted everyone to be friends with each other too.  She spent her life bringing people together.  Mom was great at figuring out a reason for everyone to get together and then organizing it and making it happen.  Like the Block Watch that she started, or her dinner parties, or Christmas parties.  And she always tried her best to make everything PERFECT.  The food, the decorations, the seating, she always had those little stick-on name-tags so you’d know everyone.  The more perfect it was the more everyone could enjoy themselves and make more friends. 

Mom always put others first, especially when it came to our family.  As kids my brother and I barely lifted a finger.  She just did everything.  But she always had time for others too.  She once wrote that her favorite thing to do was visiting people who were “shut-ins” and rarely left home.  Talking with them and helping in any way she could, and then seeing their grateful smiles.  She’d make their day and they would make hers too! THAT’S what made mom the happiest!

Mom never liked being idle.  She always tried to stay busy.  It seemed like the older she got the busier she got.  Her calendar was always chock-full.  It was so full you could hardly read it because she had to squish so many things into that tiny little space for each day.  I really can’t remember a time when I saw her just sit and watch TV.  Not until she got Alzheimer’s anyway.

As probably a lot of you know, one of Mom’s passions was for decorating.  She helped decorate THIS church countless times over the years.  And she loved decorating her home for every possible season and event.    

I think if mom could have taken any one thing with her up to heaven it would have been a box of her favorite decorations. 

Of course with the onset of Alzheimer’s all Moms’ activities slowed down and eventually stopped.  She could no longer drive to church to help decorate.  She could no longer work the computer to write the block watch newsletter, or publish the prayer chain (both of which she did for many years).  The house went undecorated for most of the usual seasons and events.  Her calendar was no longer full, just a few Dr. Appointments here and there.  It was extremely difficult for her to let go of everything but eventually she just had to.   Even so, she was NEVER EVER bitter.  She still loved to get out and walk the dog and talk to her neighbors.  She loved it when the family would come over.  She’d beam, “I’m so happy you’re here”.  “I’m so happy to see you”.  And she still loved seeing people and would always have a cheery disposition and a huge smile for everyone.  And when asked how she was doing the response would always be "I’m Wonderful!  I'm Doing Great"!  She was so brave, so courageous.  It made us all love her even more.  Her memory and love will live on inside of me and my family forever.  Her generosity will inspire us to be more generous.  And her courage will inspire us to be more courageous.  I am thankful that Ruth Ellen Engelman was my mother.  I love you mom! I miss you!

There were a bunch of us that moved into the Willowcreek neighbothood at the same time.  Our story is simular to Bob's & Ruth's.  We (Edwin & Donna across the street) were each a year appart in age, Ruth organized the Block Watch, Donna was the first one she asked to help her out, we played bridge together, ate together, belonged to differnt soroities, modified our homes, & had fun together.

Bob, you, your boys & helpers have taken great care of our Ruth.  Thank you & bless you for this tremendous undertaking.  All of us are saddened by your loss.
Our neighborhood has changed, we have lost many, some have moved away, we moved back & we still have "Ruth's block watch"  You & Ruth are amazing people.

I met Ruth and Bob when they attended the Expectant Parents' classes I  taught in Charlotte, MI.  Then they were our neighbors, two doors away, and they taught Bill and I how to play bridge.   Our friendship continued to grow, as did our families, and we enjoyed visits and times together in Wyoming, Mi and Sun City.   One of the times we especially remember was a spring break trip we shared to Mammoth Cave National Park to play golf and have fun together. 

When Bob and Ruth were moving from Michigan, I remember how surprised I was when we received a packet of cards, notes, etc. from Ruth.  They were all things she had saved from the past.   So thoughtful!  

She is in a better place now, relieved of the heart aches of Alzheimers.   And, we   
 have all those great memories of the past.