On February 3, 1972 a tiny baby boy was born, his Dad and I named him Shawn Randall Markel. He was the second child for Herb and Joyce Markel. When he was born he only had two living Grandparents and both were Grandfathers. He was a happy little guy, when he was 6 months old his Grandpa on his Mothers side passed away. When he was 13 months old he got a baby sister. Most of the time he was happy, but he did not like surprises or having all the attention on him. At the age of 4 he started Play school and cried ever time I took him then when I left him there. Next came kindergarden and more tears. the tears keep flowing for the next 2 years, then I guess he made up his mind that this  is where he would be for a long time so he went to school, but was not happy about. He was a good student and somewhat easy to get along with, he still hated surprises. Christmas mornings were always bad for him, he would go into his bedroom and pout. He did not like going to friends houses.He would not play sports with Dwayne and Herb. He would play with Monica and he did some silly things as a young child, he would dress up just for Monica. Along came junior high then high school and many friends, but a lot of them were girls. After high school, he went to college at HACC. The next step was getting married then a few years later a baby girl (Maia) with another baby coming 2 years later (Sophie).  Later in his marriage he moved his family to Texas. Herb and myself went to see them in June and took a cruise with them to Mexico.  A few trips followed, then came the day he and Crystal split up, he moved to Hawaii and we did not see him after that, many talks on the phone that would last for an hour sometimes. He was out of sight but never out of mind and always in my heart.He moved back to the State of  Washington , on October 7, 2013 his partner Brandon called us with the news that Shawn shot himself. I will never forget that day , any more then I will ever forget Shawn. I lost a third of my whole world that day. My love for my son will never die, and I will grive for him the rest of my life here on earth. I'm so thankful that his two daughters were living with us the year he left this world, as I was very busy taking care of them, and helping Herb, Monica, Colby, Ethan, Kylee and Brandon get through all this. Dwayne and I called each other a little more.  Our Family's and Church Family is very important at a time like this.Thank you Lettie, Adrianna and Gilbert for being there for us. Our  Church family was there for us also, Pastor David, B Zimmerman,  and W Pope came over the night we got the call. The members of the church took care of everthing for us, the food, service, and gave us lots of  love and support. My love for my son is as strong today,  December 5, 2013 as it was the day you came into this world.The day I die it will be stronger than the day you choose to leave this world. I loved you the day I knew you were on the way and I  will love you every tomorrow that I have on this earth. Forever and ever your Mom.

I do not know why you did what you did, but I can only feel pity and forgiveness for you.  I did not have words to express my sorrow when I found out, only tears that you were gone.  I remember when you played dolls with Monica, proud of you that you would take time to do that.  You were a good brother.  I remember when I tried to get you to play ball, you were never interested.  Then I made you a cage for your caterpillars, and that made you  so happy, you would look at the caterpillars, watch them make their cocoons and change into beautiful butterflies.  Then the day would come that you would take them outside, open up the cage door and let them out.  Your eyes would sparkle, and you would smile as you watched them fly away.  One time one of the butterfly came back to you and landed in your hand.  It seemed like it was saying thank you, then it flew away.  Then you would get toads down at Aunt Becky's picnic.  We bought an aquarium for them and you would watch them while they hibernated and shed their skin as they grew bigger.  After all this I thought you would be a vet, but you went into medicine instead.  That was because you got a job in a pharmacy.  I wonder if you had been a vet, if the things in your life would have changed.  But you should have known that no man is a failure with all the friends that you have.  I have a picture of you and your two beautiful girls hanging in the living room and your mother can not get herself to turn around and look at it yet.  You left a big hole in my heart.


Love Forever, Your Dad and Father Forever