Happy Birthday Mom ,miss you but feel as I do that all I can say

Well here it is your birthday once again I am still unable to go to your graves, I feel so betrayed by you and dad and my entire "family " well I dont feel as part of you toxic people, and that is a good thing I have chosen my family that I want to be around and if they do anything bad I will just kick them to the curb and find new family just like I have with you people, all I ever did was be used by you and dad and so called siblings. So the name Cinderella surely fit! But not anymore now I am happy to be ME THE REAL CINDY . I feel free finally of all the put downs and snide remarks and the feeling that I never was good enough,welltohell with all that old BULLSHIT now I am just me and I love ME. yes I do miss you but am conflicted by the things you and dad did to me and bubba maybe some day i ,we will get past it.

Once again this awful day of remembrance has come and I am still just as heartbroken now as the day you left 4 years ago, i miss you very much and loved you beyond measure as things happen and i really want to tell you about them but i cant anymore like i always did. But i am a little mad at you for what you wrote in that letter i should have opened it and read it before you passed and i just wonder WHY? DID YOU WRITE THOSE THINGS it hurt me deeply as i thought i could trust you of all people but now i know i shouldn't have. I can't bring myself to go visit your grave i just cant now .i feel that you and dad failed me and Mikey you both always said from the day it was bought that this was MY house but yet even though I made every payment your 4 other kids took it away from me and I am having to buy it all over again and they took the truck Dad promised Mikey for all he had done his entire life working on keeping your cars running and other things he did for you both. He got as i did NOTHING, but that's ok i always was the one that did everything for you both, while your other 4 kids did absolutely nothing to help you and neither did their spawns. And the biggest bitch of them all cathy was so money hungry that she claimed the loan you and dad took out was for me and it sure in the hell was not and I have the proof and she claimed I did some kind of forgery but again not true I was told by you to sign for the card and used it only for you. I know I did what I said I would do I am just fine with all your 4 toxic spawns being out of my life forever I am finally free to just be ME.  I no longer have to kiss anyone's butt or do stuff for them or be threatened to take my house away from me, it is truly MINE now. You can rest now I have had MY SAY !!!! I will always love you cuz you were my mom and I miss you every day.

Mom, you have been gone for 2 unbelievable years today, I dont think any one could miss you more than I do,my heart still and will always have a permanent ache.I continue on somehow and as I promised you I am taking care of Mikey the best I can he misses you very much too. What the other 4 kids did to Mikey was terrible they have abandoned him and me as well but being that they're toxic I thi k we are vetter off..They sold your house and the people are fixing it up.Mom I hope you are able to rest and you are with Dad, he loves and missed you so very much he just was never the same after you left us and I think he died so soon after you because his heart was broken.You were the best mom and friend anyone could have I love you to heaven and back ❤

Mom I will remember you Forever & Always. You were my best friend and my shopping buddy. Your birthday will be in 12 days I will burn a memory candle for you and sing you Happy Birthday that was your favorite thing at every Birthday party I had for you. I love you now and forever and I know how I will be greeted when I see you in heaven again you will Always be Fat & Sassy, your signature saying!