EULOGY for Albert John Kirkley, Sr,

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My father was born on Sunday January 15th 1933 in Chesterfield, SC.  The second son born to Ida and Ed Kirkley and had 8 brothers and sisters. His father was not in good health and so my father had to quit school in the 6th grade to help support the family.  He worked many years behind a plow in the sandy dirt of upper South Carolina.  My father was a proud man and over the years he shared many of his memories with me about his childhood.  Every time we visited grandma, my dad and I would always go out for a drive around the county he grew up in.  I loved jumping in the truck and listening to dad’s stories as he drove around reliving his memories with me.  Most of the roads in that area were sand and when I was as young as 10 my father would let me sit on his lap and steer the truck. That was very thrilling for me!   We could drive around for miles and never see another car.  My father was a great story teller so I was able to picture in my mind the things he would describe.  One of my father’s first jobs was to work for the South Carolina Highway Department.  Some of the bridges we would cross on those sandy roads was a bridge he had had a part in building.

One of his favorite things to talk about was his time in the army and being stationed in Panama.  He loved Panama.  He became the head cook and would tell me stories about how he sometimes had to get creative when it came to making meals but his sergeant loved his cooking.  He talked about how he had wanted to marry my mom and move to Panama but then he contacted malaria and had to be sent back home.  He had a few health problems because of malaria for a few years after he returned to civilian life.

But, my father’s favorite thing to talk about was meeting, dating and being with my mom.  They met on a blind day on the evening of Christmas Day 1951.  A friend of my father’s was dating my mother’s cousin so they set up the double date.   As they were heading to pick up my mother they stopped at a little general store.  The owner of the store asked, “So what are you young people up to tonight?” and my father replied; “I’m going to meet my little Margie.”  “My Little Margie” was a popular tv show at the time.  My mother’s cousin shushed my father and said, “Be quiet you fool, that’s her uncle.”  Embarrassed my father’s eyes got really big but he said my mother’s uncle just smiled and told them to have fun.  After the date my father went home and told his mother that he had met the woman he was going to marry. They just celebrated their 64th anniversary in September.

They had quite the love story of a life.  I never once heard my parents ever have an argument but, in all honesty, I think it was because of my father who was such a gentle man he did not mind backing down.  He loved my mother so much.  It was not unusual for me to go to their house and find my mother curled up on top of my father in his Lazy-Boy and them watching a Western movie way into their retirement years.

My father was always on the go.  On his days off if he was not working in his garden, on the house or in his woodshop he was in his truck going somewhere.  After he retired he got a part-time shop delivering flowers for a local florist.  He loved that job because it gave him the opportunity to drive around the city and meet all kinds of people.  My father was quite charming and had a great sense of humor and people enjoyed being around him.  He loved to go to flea markets and thrift stores and he would drive my mother crazy bringing all kinds of stuff home and then when someone visited he had to take them on a little tour around the house to show them all the treasures he had bought and he had to tell them; “I got this for 50 cents” and with such pride.

When I moved to St. Louis I vowed that I would visit my parents every three months and I kept that promise.  For 12 years I flew home every three months.  I enjoyed going home and spending time with mom and dad.  Dad and I would always spend one full day together.  We would go to a movie and lunch and then a thrift store or just walk around the mall.  Sometimes we’d drive to visit someone that he had not seen in a while.

Unfortunately, my father did have a problem with getting older.  As his body became less able to do thing it saddened him.  I understood this because I knew that my father was still the same man with the same desires, and likes of when he was 20 but now his body wouldn’t let him do them.  I was very excited when my parents called me to tell me that they had decided to move to Atlanta to be near me.  I feel very lucky that I got to spend so much time with my father and my mother over the last 5 years.

The day the doctor’s told us he was going into hospice care was the last day I was able to communicate with dad, some what.  He wasn’t eating well.  The nurse brought him some cherry Jell-O and he ate only about two bites but he was just too weak to eat anymore.  The lady from hospice came into the room for me to sign a form and my mother was beside my father.  My mother yelled out, “He’s bleeding…his mouth is bleeding!!”  The lady from hospice gasped and I turned to mom and said, “No mom, it is the Jell-O he just ate.”  But my mom doesn’t hear well and she was getting upset…so I had to say more loudly. “No mom! It is the Red Jell-O he just ate!”  The lady from hospice said, “I’m SO glad you knew that I didn’t know what to do.”  My father started laughing…we all looked at him and started laughing too.  The last mindful thing that came from my father was his sense of humor.

I will close by telling you what my father told me right after I graduated from high school.  He said, “Son, you will find life a lot easier if you’re nice.”  I have tried to live my life by my father’s words.

I love you Daddy