- 95 years old
- Date of birth: Jun 12, 1916
- Date of passing: Apr 3, 2012
|Let the memory of Alfred be with us forever|
"Ohhhhh Dindad........... ........ 5 years ago, I was running around filling 10 green bottles with 95 white roses, as if in mockery, my rose tree fell over in the night!
It was supposed to be YOU walking Zoe and I down THAT aisle NOT the other way round, Dindad! I should NEVER have walked you down the aisle..... ....I shouldn't have done lots of things... ... They always tell us to make sure our clothes are flame resistant, yet they had padded you out in stuff under your clothes like a Guy Fawkes, and knowing that I was carrying a firework on my shoulders, hurt all the more.
You NEVER said what you truly felt... ...so, does that mean you didn't do it your way or you did? You only told me during those final days, Dindad.... ....Why? Why, did you leave it so long? I LOVED (and still do) you so much, YOU were the ONLY man in my life that I ever could trust NOT to hurt me. YOU made me feel safe, secure and LOVED!! I needed you as much as you needed me.
I have been talking to you for the last 3 weeks, constantly, I don't know if you've been listening... ...probably too busy catching up with Eileen. However, I now know why you saved me last July.... ....YOU never did forgive me for getting your driving licence taken off you, did you? I wish it wasn't me, Dindad, I knew how much it meant to you, but, I couldn't stand by and do nothing... ... Your driving was still the same as in the 1970's and now we had too many youngsters and crazy drivers on the road. Your health WAS deteriorating.. ....maybe, they should have just asked you to take a retest, instead of such an abrupt, harsh way of an end to your greatest pleasure in life - driving. I could not say to you that I was "sorry" enough, whilst you were alive.. ... and, even though you said it was "ok", it wasn't, and that's what all this is about... .... Karma, my back operations, the mess that I am in now, is all payback for what I did. I am truly, deeply sorry, Dindad, I don't know what else I can say or do to make it up to you....... .......Please, please, I understand now, and I have had enough, so don't save me next time... ....I want to be with you.. ...the one MAN that ever meant ANYTHING to me.. MY wonderful (GRAND)FATHER.... LOVE & MISS YOU SO MUCH xxxxxxx"
I'm sorry that it's taken me so long to visit you; truth is, this year has been harder than any of the preceding ones' and I really don't know why, maybe it is because it's 5 years and in my head 5 years is an anniversary! Maybe, I know that 5 years, also separated you and Marma and I am so scared that you will call her to join you this year.... ....She looks so frail now Dindad, but please don't, not yet, I know it's selfish of me... ...I just need her here a little while longer. I need to know that I can phone her and she will be there for me as she always has been (and you always were), with her 'pearls of wisdom'. I know that she misses you deeply and yearns to join you also... ...leave her a while longer, just a 'tiddlybit' please?
Mum is tired, I know, and could use a break... ...a break from living I think :) .. ... She is now the glue keeping this family together - as you know a hard role for any one to take on.
It's so funny that I go to your grave and yet I know damn well, that you are not there. You are with Marma, at her house...... ........every time I walk in there, I come out with your expressions, without realising that I am even doing it! I can smell you there, feel you, I just can't hear you or see you or touch you :( - the very things that I long to do...... .......just one more time Dindad, I will never get over losing you. I will always miss you and shall keep on loving you until we meet again, your Angel xxxxxxxxxxx"
"Happy 100th Birthday Dad. Time passes but you live on within our memories and this would have been your very special day. Love and miss you loads and loads xxxxxxxxxxx"
"Happy Birthday To You, Happy Birthday to You, Happy 100th Birthday Dear Dindad, Happy Birthday To You. All my love as ever, Your Angel
"4 years ago, you had spent the last night of your life in your own bed, I still find this so hard to believe. You never returned to your wonderful home, that was so much more than bricks and mortar. Everything about your house had your seal on it, your touch, your eye to detail. It breaks my heart how time moves on, but I can't... ... I want to be back in THAT house, playing Scrabble with you, playing cards with you, enjoying my half a Rich Tea with my morning cup of tea in bed, helping you. More than anything though, I WANT you. I still feel so guilty Dindad, I'm sorry, that when you needed me most, I let you down. Love you always xxxxxxx"
"Where are you?? I really miss you & your wise words!! Please, please, please show me what I have to do??!! I love you as always xxxxxxx"
"You would have been 99 today
But instead you went away
No more pain or sorrow
and no more tmorrow.
Happy Birthday Dad
If you were still with us, today we would have had a huge party!
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday my fantastic Grandfather,
Happy Birthday to you....
... Happy 99!
I hope that wherever you are, you enjoy it.
Always and forever in my broken heart.
Love and miss you forever and ever xxxxxxxxxx"
"Dearest Dindad, I can't see through the tears :( . Time isn't a great healer!! If anything, it get's harder with every passing year. There hasn't been 1 single day, since you left, that I haven't thought of you. Three years of pain and mental torture. Will it ever end? I miss you now as much (if not more), than 3rd April 2012!!! Today is Good Friday!! Hardly!! I will always love you, as will everyone else. I only hope that you are waiting for me (as always)!! Rest now Dindad, my fantastic, talented and amazing Grandfather xxxxx"
"Another year has passed and the pain is still as great as ever. I miss you so much although I hear you instructing me in your head. You are loved as much as anyone can. RIP my wonderful father. xxxxxx"
"Happy Birthday my wonderful, dearest Grandfather. Love and miss you always and forever xxxxx"
"Happy Birthday Dad. You would have been 98 years old. How quickly these times come around and I still miss you as much as ever. We will raise a glass tonight to you wherever you are. RIP my fantastic father.
Lots of love, hugs and kisses xxxxxxxxxx"
"My dearest Dindad, this year you would have been 98 just 2 years off your goal, but NO, you had to go. What Mum says is so true, you were always so loved by everyone who knew you and still are. I miss all your quirky ways too and comments eg "no, no, no, yes" and "that wasn't a fish, it was a whale!!" I miss your laugh, I miss everything about you, but not for too much longer now. You were the BEST. RIP my angel xxxx"
"So hard to believe 2 years have passed since you left us all. It is still very hard seeing your empty place at the table, your empty chair, you, standing at the sink washing up. I know it was your time to leave; you had suffered more then enough. I hope you know you are loved as much now as when you were with us and that you always will be with us in our everyday thoughts. Love and miss you so very very much Dad. RIP. xxxxxxxxxx"
"Happy Father's Day Dindad, you were always more than a Grandfather to me and in the latter years, you became the FATHER that I needed, forever in my heart (as that - my father).
Love and miss you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx"
"Happy Birthday Dad. There is still a great big empty space in our lives and it is so hard without you, our best mentor. I hope you have found Skye and that you are together. Love and miss you. xxxxx"
"Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday dearest Dindad,
Happy Birthday to you .....
Gone but not forgotten - ever.
Love and miss you from the bottom of my heart xxxxx"
"Although you are no longer with us in body your spirit lives on through us. Your words spill from our mouths; your movements are there in our actions and your life goes on through us. You were and still are the most fantastic Dad, Grandad and Great Grandad. Your love will never leave us and our love for you will go on until eternity. Missed but never forgotten. xxx"
"This month has been so hard remembering the traumatic events of your passing a year ago. You mean't so much to everyone who knew you and were loved by all (and still are). I wish we could turn back time, but unfortunately we can't. Warwick Hospital has blood on their hands, and I will never forgive them for your death. We all know that you are now free of pain but that doesn't lessen ours."
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