Your birthday yesterday was a hard day for me Amanda, some years I can remember how much I love and miss you so much, I remember the good times we all had and I can get through your birthday with a smile. Yesterday was different once again, I couldn’t get how unfair it was for you to have such a short life!  I’m sad, I’m mad at God, I’m in a dark place again and I know it will take me some time to climb back out again…. But I do Amanda, I make myself smile even though I’m dying inside, I don’t want to see or speak to anyone, but again, I do!!! Love you to the moon and back my Janey Paney, want you back so much❤️❤️

Happy Birthday Amanda :-) Miss you Always xxxxx

Happy Heavenly Christmas Amanda, your mum and I share the same heartache as we both lost our beautiful girls. You and your mum are always in my thoughts and prayers ♥️

Merry Heavenly Christmas my darling girl. Miss you more than words would describe.

Oh Janey Paney, It’s Christmas once again and my heart and thoughts are still in the two worlds, here and in heaven with you.  Christmas is the worst holiday to live through here, all I remember is the beautiful memories of the Christmas’ we had when you were here and ever since you passed the Christmas’ have never been the same. Oh yes, the smile is on my faces but the tears and the heartbreak are hidden inside of me. I so miss you my darling girl it was so unfair for you to miss out on so much life Amanda but all I can do is send all my love, all my thoughts and all my kisses and hugs to you, I love and yearn to see you and hold you but until then my girl I send you happy Christmas thoughts. The tears fall like a waterfall in my heart for you Amanda, Always.  Love for Christmas from Mum

My darling girl, whoever thought I would make it to 31 years after you went to heaven! Well I certainly didn’t. You are missed more than ever as the years go by, I still pray that you will walk into the room every day. I send all my love and my hugs up to you, I just wish I could hold you in my arms once again my love. I’ve lived half here on earth and the other half with you in heaven and it is there that I’ll see you once again Amanda, my heart flies to you . LOVE ALWAYS, Mum

Another Christmas Dsy Amanda Jayne and how much you are missed. I’m sending you all the love in my heart to you in Heaven and hope your having a roaring time up there with the family we have lost since you went to heaven. Give everyone a hug and kiss from me my love. You are in my heart, mind and thoughts every day of the year

God bless you Amanda, such a beautiful girl. Thinking of you and your mum today, sending much love and many hugs xxx

It is your 30th Angelversary today Amanda, never would I thought I would be saying that. 30 years without you here with us has taken its toll on all of us my love. Deborah and Alan miss you so much too, my how would you just love your nieces and nephew. There is so much you have missed out on but whatever it is, be it a birthday a wedding or a get-together, you are there Amanda cause you are in me, in my heart and soul and will be till we see each other again my darling little girl. Loved and missed beyond measure Amanda

Miss you every day Amanda xxxx

Hello my gorgeous girl, another Birthday passed by for you Amanda and the want of you to be here with me never lessens. My heart is with you my pretty one, always and a day. Give all those who have been welcomed into heaven by you my love and I know they will have given you a wonderful birthday in heaven. Forever in my heart and thoughts Amanda

Happy Heavenly Birthday Amanda, I feel I know you just by reading the posts from your mam and seeing the photos she posts. You're such a beautiful young lady and your smile melts my heart. I know you'll be right beside your mam today and I hope she sees the messages you leave her. Please give my Kathryn a big hug from me ❤❤

Amanda I never knew you but I see the photo's of your beautiful face and lovely smile that your mam posts and I know that life is so hard for her. My Kathryn is there some where with you and I know if you've met you will be good friends. I message your mam often and we have our little chats. God Bless you Amanda you will never be forgotten ❤

My heart will forever be broken for the want of you Amanda, I am so empty and I long for you. Give Grandma a big kiss from me and tell her I yearn for her to be still here too. Our hearts will never be the same from all the losses we have suffered over the years but I know you will all be waiting with arms outstretched when it is my time to follow. 
Love you to the moon and back barefoot

So many years have gone by Amanda but you are still in all our thoughts.
I'm sure Grandma is giving you big heavenly hugs.
G.B.N.F.
Y.N.W.A.
❤❤❤❤❤

Oh, my beautiful girl, I miss you so much and long to see your beautiful face and hold, hug and kiss you. I hope all the angel friends you have met gave you a wonderful party for your birthday my love. Sending you my heart my darling girl

You're in my thoughts and prayers Amanda, I like to think that you have made friends with my girl Kathryn and are spending fun times together. Also sending your mum much love and many hugs xxx

Never far from my thoughts Mand. Happy Birthday xxx

You are so beautiful Amanda, I wish I’d had the chance to meet you and your mum. Thinking of you both and sending much love, many hugs and lots of prayers ❤️❤️❤️

Happy Birthday Amanda xxx

Amanda, you and your mum are always in my thoughts and prayers ❤

Forever and a day I will love and miss you sweetheart. My heart is with you

Forever missed and forever loved. Always in our hearts and minds Amanda, Love you always xxxx

Happy birthday Amanda xxxxx Forever Missed xxxx

Mum,

When you're feeling down and blue,
And your day is getting hard for you,
Just remember you're not on your own,
I'm always there; you're never alone.

You might not be able to see my face,
As hard as you look around the place,
But close your eyes and think of me,
And before you know it there will be me.

Keep me in the midst of your mind,
And life will seem easier, I think you'll find,
So when life gets too dark to bear,
Just close your eyes and I will be there.

Amanda Jayne

WHAT IS NORMAL AFTER YOUR CHILD HAS PASSED AWAY?

Normal is having tears waiting behind every smile when you realise your child is missing from all the important events in your family's life.
Normal is trying to decide what to take to her resting place for Birthdays, Christmas, New Year, Her Angelversary etc.
Normal is feeling like you can't sit another minute without getting up and screaming, because you just don't like to sit through anything anymore.
Normal is not sleeping very well because a thousand what if's & why didn't I's go through your head constantly.
Normal is continuously reliving that horrible day of your child's passing through your eyes and mind, holding your head to make it go away.
Normal is having the TV on the minute you walk into the house to have noise, because the silence is deafening.
Normal is every happy event in your life always being backed up with sadness lurking close behind, because of the hole in your heart.
Normal is telling the story of your child's passing as if it were an everyday, commonplace activity, and then seeing the horror in someone's eyes at
how awful it sounds. And yet realizing it has
become a part of your "normal."
Normal is coming up with the difficult task of how to honour your child's memory on their birthday and holidays and Angelversary to survive these days. And trying to find the balloon or flag that fit's the occasion. "Happy Birthday”? Not really. Happy Angelversary? Never!
Normal is my heart warming and yet sinking at the sight of something special my child loved. Thinking how she would love it, but how she is not here to enjoy it.
Normal is having some people afraid to mention my child.
Normal is making sure that others do remember her.
Normal is after the funeral is over, everyone else goes on with their lives, but we continue to grieve our loss forever.
Normal is seeing other families who are "whole" and thinking of how lucky they are. And thinking back on memories of when we were a whole family and knowing that it will never be that way again because our family chain was broken.
Normal is weeks, months, years and years after the initial shock, the grieving gets worse, not better, because with every passing day, you miss her more.
Normal is not listening to people compare anything in their life to this loss, unless they too have had a child pass. Nothing compares. Absolutely Nothing.
Losing a parent is horrible, but having to bury your own child is unnatural... a complete nightmare that you never wake up from.
Normal is taking pills, and trying not to cry all day, because you know your mental health depends on it.
Normal is realizing that you do cry every day.
Normal is being impatient with everything and everyone except someone stricken with grief over the loss of their own child.
Normal is sitting at the computer crying, sharing how you feel with chat friends who have also lost a child.
Normal is not wanting to hear that my child is in a better place because although I know she is in heaven, I will never understand why my beautiful child was taken from this earth. It makes absolutely no sense to this grieving mother.
Normal is being too tired to care if you paid the bills, cleaned the house, did the laundry or if there is any food... too tired to even get ready to go to the doctor to find out why you’re so tired.
Normal is asking God why he took your child's life instead of yours.
Normal is knowing you will never get over this loss, not in a day nor a million years.
Normal is having Doctors agree with you that you will never "really" get over the pain and that there is nothing they can do to help you because they know that only bringing your child back could possibly make it "better".
Normal is learning to lie to everyone you meet and telling them you are fine. You lie because it makes others uncomfortable if you cry. You've learned it's easier to lie to them than to tell them the truth that you still feel empty and heartbroken, and it's probably never going to get any better, not ever.
And last of all:
Normal is hiding all the things that have become "normal" for you to feel, so that everyone around you will think that you are "normal"

How quickly the years go by, you touched so many lives Amanda and your strength and courage was amazing. Still loved and still missed. G.B.N.F. xxxxxx

Happy Birthday my beautiful sister... Forever missed .... Xxxxxxx

Happy Birthday my Amanda Jayne, my heart wishes it could fly up to you and give you. Hug, your cards and presents.  I miss you more and more each day

Happiest birthday in heaven Amanda!
Have a dance with Patrick Swayze and party long into the star filled night with my Rachael

Never forgotten, forever loved, and forever cherished.
Some people leave a memory, you left a lifetime of them.
Hugs sweetheart

My precious Amanda it is years since you left us and God called you Home. I miss you so very, very much and my tears will never stop until the day that I see you again. I try so hard all the time to be strong and keep the smile on my face, but there are those times that the smile fades, the thoughts of your suffering causes me deep heartache and not having you here with us is just so painful.

You had a beautiful heart Amanda, you were such a wonderful daughter that anyone could ever want and I feel so very lucky, proud and honored to be your Mum. God has truly blessed me in allowing you to be a very important part of my life. I only wish that he would have let you stay longer. I guess God had special plans for you in Heaven when he took you home. You were a most honest, loyal and intelligent daughter and I am still amazed at how really wonderful you were and still are to me.

You were so very brave and courageous, throughout all those times that you had to go into hospital, throughout all that year Amanda you were still so thoughtful, kind and considerate of others and did not dwell on what was happening to yourself. 

I miss your very loving and sparkling eyes that twinkled all the time, but more so when you were amused. I miss your wonderful smile and laughter that warmed my heart. If only I could take myself on a journey to where you are right now, it would make me so happy, but I know that is not possible and I will see you again when it is my time. I will just have to be content in knowing that your Spirit is always with me, just as my heart is with you and always will be.

Don't stop sending me all the signs I have had from you over the years Amanda, they brighten my days and warm my heart, right to my very Soul, I will miss you for eternity as I know you are missed so much by Deborah, Alan and Eddie, by your Aunties, Uncles, Cousins and your Gran. You will forever be in our hearts my Amanda Jayne, My Shining Star

Happy Birthday my beautiful girl, years go by, but you are always here with me in my heart and thoughts. I love you and miss you too much for words to describe. Party hard with our Angels my precious child, love you till the sun don't shine, Mum

Amanda, still so loved and missed by so many...but none more than your mother.
Not a day goes by that she doesn't long for you...you touched so very many lives and you will truly never be forgotten..you live on in so many memories, in the amazing things you've done, in the stories your Mum shares about you, and in the hearts of all that were fortunate enough to know you.
Fly high sweet one and happy birthday in heaven. Xxxxxxxx

"Wishing On A Star"

I'm wishin' on a star
To follow where you are
I'm wishin' on a dream
To follow what it means

I'm wishin' on a star
To follow where you are
I'm wishin' on a dream
To follow what it means

And I wish on all the rainbows that I see
I wish on all the people who really dream
And I'm wishin' on tomorrow, praying it'll come
And I'm wishin' on all the lovin' we've ever done

I never thought I'd see
A time when you would be
So far away from home
So far away from me

Just think of all the moments that we spent
I just can't let you go, for me you were meant
And I didn't mean to hurt you, but I know
That in the game of lovin', you reap what you sow

I feel it's time we should make up, baby
I feel it's time for us to get back together
And make the best of things, oh, baby, when we're together
Whether or never

I feel it's time we should make up, baby
I feel it's time for us to get back together
And make the best of things, oh, baby, when we're together
Whether or never

I'm wishing on a star
To follow where you are
I'm wishin' on a dream
To follow what it means

And I wish on all the rainbows that I see
I wish on all the people we ever greeted
And I'm hopin' on all the days to come and days to go
And I'm hopin' on days of lovin' you so

I'm wishin' on a star
To follow where you are
I'm wishing on a star, whoa-oh
And I wish on all the rainbows that I see

I'm wishin' on a star
To follow where you are
I'm wishin' on a star

My heart, mind and arms miss you so much my angel. Everyday you are in my thoughts, there is not a moment goes by that I do not think of you. There is so much you have missed out on here on earth, I know you are watching from Heaven, but, oh Amanda, it is never the same! Love and miss you sweetheart, Always, your Mum

Dearest Amanda, This earth and surely your family will never be the same since you've gone, and the same can be said for the place you went to.....
Much love to the ones that still miss you so, and hugs to you sweet one.

Miss you everyday Amanda. You are in my heart always

I am sending a dove to Heaven,
With a parcel on it's wings.
Be careful when you open it
it's full of beautiful things.
Inside are a million kisses,
wrapped up in a million hugs.
They say how much we miss you,
and send you all our love.
We hold you close within our hearts,
and there you will remain.
To walk with us throughout our life
Until we meet again.


Love you Amanda, Y.N.W.A xxx <3

Love and miss you every single day Mand, Till we meet again xxxxxxxxxx

I am sending this message to my child
                           Whom no longer walks this plain
                          A message filled with so much love
                              Yet also filled with pain

                          My heart continues to skip a beat
                           When I think about your death
                        Then I think of times we'll never share
                         I have to stop and catch my breath

                        An Angelversary day is filled with love
                          From others who miss you too
                      But for a mother the most perfect love in life
                          Is the love I shared with you

                        I am thinking of you today my child
                        With a sadness that is unspoken
                       As I Mark another Angelversary day
                         With my heart forever broken

                Forever Loved, Forever Missed and Forever Young
                            Amanda Jayne Edwards

AMANDA JAYNE

If Heaven had a stairway
I would use it everyday
I'd climb right up to Heaven
Especially today

Today it is your Birthday
There is nothing I'd love more
Than to walk right up to Heaven
And knock upon that door

Oh, if Heaven had a stairway
I'd love to see your face
To hold you close and kiss you
To see you dressed in lace

Your Birthday brings such memories
Your laughter, joy and mirth
Oh, if Heaven had a stairway
I'd leave right now from earth

Happy Birthday Sweetheart

You will always be in my heart Amanda, fly high with the angels my child. Missed more than words can ever say. Love you to Heaven and back ❤❤❤

Thinking of you as always, xxxx Miss you everyday xxxx

Please help those all around me, to see and understand
That even though my child’s in heaven
The memories of our time together, are always here to stay
You see today is special, after all it’s my child’s birthday

I hope my friends will understand and see how much I care
And better yet can lend an ear, and smile as I share.
I pray they never lose a child or ever know this pain.
I just want them to know, my child’s memories remain

Oh yes today is special, another birthday it should be…
And yes I wish my child was here, but it wasn’t meant to be
I hope the angels sing aloud; I hope my child can see
As we celebrate their life and all their memories…

Love for our child begins so early and never goes away
And I’m grateful for her time on earth, but sad she couldn’t stay
Of course it wasn’t long enough, but how wonderful it was
Her laugh, Her smile, but most of all, the gifts she left behind

So I hope that those around, can see beyond my smile
And my Words that, "I'm okay."
And know that yes today is special,
And join along with me
As we celebrate – today – my child’s birthday

Happy Birthday in Heaven My Beautiful Amanda Jayne

Forever in my heart and thoughts Amanda xxxx

Hello my love, I miss you so much, I just wanted to tell you that I see the signs that you give to me and though I shed a tear, I want you to keep on sending them and I will keep on sending my love and my thoughts to you up in Heaven. I know that you hear me Amanda, I know you are watching over us all, but oh how I wish you were still here with us. I LOVE YOU Forever and a day my love ❤❤

Another year has passed us by without you sweetheart, You are forever in my heart and thoughts and are so missed by us all.  Love You till the day I see you again. Forever Missed, Forever Loved and Forever Young Amanda.... Mum, Eddie (dad) Deborah and Alan xxxxx

A Happy Heavenly Birthday Sweetheart, You are Forever in my heart ❤❤❤

Happy Birthday Amanda xx Forever with me xx