Ave Spratt – Memorial Mass

It’s unfortunate that our numbers are so limited this evening, but I am grateful for the opportunity to speak more personally with you.

Priscilla, the other night after Mass, we talked about Ave’s passing. I remember that, with a smile on your face, you told me about Ave’s last day, driving the go-kart, indulging his “need for speed.” It was very telling that, while most people in your situation would have been speaking about your own personal grief and challenges, just a few days after losing your husband, you were focused on the fact that, if Ave had to have a last day on earth, this was a good one.

When I asked how you and the family were doing, I got a sense that both you and the family, although terribly saddened by Ave’s death, had already achieved some level of peace. How does that happen? I remember that you spoke to me about your sense that heaven and earth are not distant from one another. If I understood you correctly, you were saying (my words) that, if there is a barrier between heaven and earth, it’s more like an old screen than a brick wall. This is the blessing of faith. And we see it reflected in the first reading that you chose for this evening’s Mass: “In the eyes of the foolish, they seemed to have died, and their departure was thought to be a disaster, and their going from us to be their destruction, but they are at peace.”

I think we take away two messages. First, if by faith, we believe that Ave is at peace, then we can share with him some level of peace and even joy, despite our sadness. And please understand that sadness is normal and healthy and real. Our faith gives us hope, but it can’t entirely insulate us from sorrow. And second is the point that you made, Priscilla – the dead are never far from us. Ave will never be far from us.

I also saw an image of one of your “Ave stories” in the second reading that you chose. You told me that in the year 2000, Ave received his first communion. Afterward, you asked him how he felt when he received the Eucharist. His response: “I felt complete.”

In this second reading, Saint Paul was writing to Timothy. He knew that his own death was imminent, and yet he had a sense of peace. His words speak of a sense of – to use Ave’s word – completion: “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” Ave’s first communion was not the end of his race, but was the foundation of a spiritual strength that would, indeed, allow him to finish the race.

That’s what I saw in this reading. But I wondered whether you chose it because of Ave’s fascination with actual racing. Was that it? I still remember him telling me: “Life begins at 600 horsepower!”

Father Paul chose the Gospel reading, and I’m happy he chose the one he did. It allows me to make an important observation about Ave – an observation that you, his children – should understand and remember.

Jesus said: “The person who loves their life loses it, and the person who hates their life in this world will keep it for eternal life.” When Jesus said that we should hate our life in this world, he wasn’t suggesting that we should make our lives miserable, and that, somehow, we would be better people if we were miserable. Jesus wasn’t saying that. He was exaggerating to make a point, the point being that we can become attached to the things of this world to such an extent that we neglect or lose interest in the really important things. The “things of this world” include material possessions, wealth, power and status. Ave had all of those. Did it make him a bad person that he had, and enjoyed, snowmobiles, boats, go-karts, and an electric car that did 0-100 km/hr in less than three seconds? Of course not. Can you imaging your dad getting off a snowmobile and saying: “Now I feel complete?” Obviously not.

We are called to love God and love our neighbour. Ave vocalized his love for God when he spoke about his first communion, and showed his love for God countless times when he insisted that you come with him to Sunday Mass. Toys are toys, but God is God. And I don’t think Ave was confused about that – at all.

When we speak about love of neighbour, we typically talk about sharing our time, talents, and treasures. And the extent to which we do that is a clear indication of whether our first love is for God or for the things of this world. And here again, Ave demonstrated his love for God by serving his neighbour. I was always amazed that despite his many family and work-related obligations, he had the time – or, more correctly – made the time to lend his talents to various committees and worthwhile causes. He had a real talent for that and he put his talent at the service of others. And, of course, he was also generous in sharing his treasures. There is a school in rural Nepal that would not have been built were it not for the generous support of Ave and your mother. And this is only one of many examples of his generosity.

I am happy to be able to talk to you, his children, about these things. You’ve grown up in a privileged environment as a result of the hard work and sacrifices of your parents. At a time like this, when we recall your dad’s life, it’s important to remember the things that were most important to him: the love of God, family, and neighbour.

Kids, your dad, Priscilla, your husband, was a remarkable man. Have faith that he rests with the Lord, have trust that he will never be far from you, and imitate him in sharing love generously.