ForeverMissed

This memorial website was created in memory of our Dad, Barry Palmer, 70 years old, born on January 17, 1949 and passed away unexpectedly on April 4, 2019 in Burnsville, MN. We will remember him forever.

He was born and raised in Marshall, MN and attended technical college in Willmar, MN. He was a Robotics Engineer until his early 50's. He then took his previous passion for flipping houses and turned it into a business of home remodeling. He loved to design, build and create. He retired in his early 60's and since retiring has enjoyed meeting several new card players, spoiling his grandkids and valued spending as much time as he could with his family. 

He LOVED to socialize with people anywhere he went. In his younger years he enjoyed playing softball, racquetball, volleyball, and tennis. He was an extraordinary storyteller who also loved playing cribbage, chess, cards and games. He found joy in camping, was a self-proclaimed math whiz (and took any opportunity to prove it), and was always up for a good challenge. Notorious for his renegade spirit and his witty sense of humor, while a very stubborn man he was an extremely compassionate soul. He fulfilled a lifelong dream of creating a model train layout where he expressed his passion for building, designing, and tinkering.

He is proceeded in death by: daughter, Angie Palmer-Daniel, brother Jerry Palmer, sister Nadine (Palmer) Bump, mother Jean (Knutson) Palmer, father Woodrow Palmer and many other loved ones. 

He is survived by: daughters: Nikki (Todd) Matheson and Tasha (Ernst) Freyer; grandchildren: Cameron Moede (18), Belle Freyer (16), Emma Matheson (14), Porter Matheson (13), Ky Freyer (13), Abbie Buchanan (9), Khloe Buchanan (9), step children, step grandchildren, extended family and many really close friends.

Memorial service will be at 11:00am on Saturday, April 13, 2019 at White Funeral Home (14560 Pennock Ave) Apple Valley, MN. Memorial visitation one hour prior to the service. 

Some people come into our lives and touch our hearts so deeply that we will never be the same again.

Posted by Clara Freyer on April 15, 2019
I can imagine how sad it is for Tasha en Nikki to loose their father. In my memory he will remain as a very nice man who loved company, he was really a family man.
And I remember the few times we visit America at first with my husband Fred and later with my daughter Xandra, he always took us to the Japanese, he was really enjoying himself and so were we.
We shall miss him too.
Posted by Theresa Sayers on April 11, 2019
Oh my goodness what a shock. I am forever grateful to Barry for many reasons but most importantly, my husband.
Barry and I worked together at Thiele Engineering in Edina. We were great friends and constant lunch partners with a group of great people. What a fun place to work. He did have fun stories and absolutely exhibited his math skills all the time.
When Barry heard about a guy who was single, and knew I was single too, he decided to arrange an introduction. I remember saying, “Is he at least tall?” Barry explained the guy was 6’4”. I agreed. That was 21 and a half years ago and Bob and I have been together ever since.
I am so sad to hear of his passing. Barry always has a unique way of including people in a conversation whether he agreed with people or not. I will always remember him with great fondness. God bless his family.
Posted by Erik van der Meer on April 9, 2019
I met Barry probably somewhere in november 2006. I just came to live in MN with my wife and I knew Ernst, his son in law. Right from the start we liked each other. I did the odd job for him and had the pleasure of working besides him a few times as well. That always was fun, he had a great sense of humor and he was very knowledgeable; I could learn from him.
I came to know him as a loving dad, a kind man that loved to have people around him. I still remember having parties at his house with the grill on and having great conversations.
Unfortunately the only contact we had since 2008 (when I moved back to Holland) was through internet. On hindsight of course it should have been way more often.
I will miss him and his jokes. This is really a great loss, but I always have some great memories!!
My heart goes out to the ones he left behind.
Posted by Bob Heinzen on April 6, 2019
From the first time i met Barry in the fall of 2017---he had the ability to put you at ease with his words and his sincerity. He was gifted with this talent and everyone knew that you could count on Barry to lend a ear. Truly a treasure, He will be greatly missed. God bless his family.

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Recent Tributes
Posted by Clara Freyer on April 15, 2019
I can imagine how sad it is for Tasha en Nikki to loose their father. In my memory he will remain as a very nice man who loved company, he was really a family man.
And I remember the few times we visit America at first with my husband Fred and later with my daughter Xandra, he always took us to the Japanese, he was really enjoying himself and so were we.
We shall miss him too.
Posted by Theresa Sayers on April 11, 2019
Oh my goodness what a shock. I am forever grateful to Barry for many reasons but most importantly, my husband.
Barry and I worked together at Thiele Engineering in Edina. We were great friends and constant lunch partners with a group of great people. What a fun place to work. He did have fun stories and absolutely exhibited his math skills all the time.
When Barry heard about a guy who was single, and knew I was single too, he decided to arrange an introduction. I remember saying, “Is he at least tall?” Barry explained the guy was 6’4”. I agreed. That was 21 and a half years ago and Bob and I have been together ever since.
I am so sad to hear of his passing. Barry always has a unique way of including people in a conversation whether he agreed with people or not. I will always remember him with great fondness. God bless his family.
Posted by Erik van der Meer on April 9, 2019
I met Barry probably somewhere in november 2006. I just came to live in MN with my wife and I knew Ernst, his son in law. Right from the start we liked each other. I did the odd job for him and had the pleasure of working besides him a few times as well. That always was fun, he had a great sense of humor and he was very knowledgeable; I could learn from him.
I came to know him as a loving dad, a kind man that loved to have people around him. I still remember having parties at his house with the grill on and having great conversations.
Unfortunately the only contact we had since 2008 (when I moved back to Holland) was through internet. On hindsight of course it should have been way more often.
I will miss him and his jokes. This is really a great loss, but I always have some great memories!!
My heart goes out to the ones he left behind.
his Life

His life...

He was born and raised in Marshall, MN and attended technical college in Willmar, MN. He was a Robotics Engineer until his early 50's. He then took his previous passion for flipping houses and turned it into a business of home remodeling. He loved to design, build and create. He retired in his early 60's and since retiring has enjoyed meeting several new card players, spoiling his grandkids and valued spending as much time as he could with his family. 

He LOVED to socialize with people anywhere he went. In his younger years he enjoyed playing softball, racquetball, volleyball, and tennis. He was an extraordinary storyteller who also loved playing cribbage, chess, cards and games. He found joy in camping, was a self-proclaimed math whiz (and took any opportunity to prove it), and was always up for a good challenge. Notorious for his renegade spirit and his witty sense of humor, while a very stubborn man he was an extremely compassionate soul. He fulfilled a lifelong dream of creating a model train layout where he expressed his passion for building, designing, and tinkering.

Recent stories
Shared by Susan Lee on April 15, 2019

As I read the stories through tear filled eyes, I can't help but laugh and cry at the same time.  Bare was an amazing friend / brother to Bill and I and we will cherish our memories of him.  Gone from our lives but forever in our hearts.  ❣️

Tasha's Eulogy (4/13/19)

Shared by Ernst Freyer on April 15, 2019

Where do I begin?

I knew this day would eventually come, 18 years ago my dad was told he had only a few weeks to live and told to get his affairs in order. Well, he defied the odds...

He was taken from us unexpectedly last week and much sooner than any of us expected given the 9 lives he seemed to have.

My parents divorced when Nikki and I were young, so dad was a weekend dad when we were growing up. But he was not just your average weekend dad…

He made those weekends count! He fed us “Shit on a Shingle” and milk toast from an early age. A staple from his childhood that Nikki and I learned to love! He joined a group of singles called PWP, Parents Without Partners, which shaped our childhoods. He met other parents in the same situation as him and soon we began to enjoy many weekends of gathering, camping and fun activities with the kids of the other Parents Without Partners. In the summer we would go camping all the time. He would get the camper ready, shop and pack all the food, pick up Nikki and I and our little sister Angie and head out of town to our weekend destination. While us kids would have fun with our friends and run around he would set up the camper, set up the tents and prepare the campsite for the weekend. I am sure he complained, but I honestly cannot recall him complaining. He just did it! Those times are some of my happiest memories I have as a child with him.

He taught me how to jump on a chair and freak out when I see a spider. Last fall Ernst and I were traveling for work and I bought these fake tarantulas and thought I’d play a practical joke on him and I stuck one under the covers in the bed so when he stuck his feet in he would feel something and reach down to pull it out and “hopefully scream”. Well the joke was on me because I put the spider on Ernst’s side of the bed thinking he would sleep on that side and he ended up sleeping on my side... I also taped one to the shower wall hoping when he opened the shower curtain to start the shower he would freak out. Well, once again the joke was on me because he stuck one of those spiders under my pillow and when I got home and went to lay on my side and put my arm under my pillow, my hand ran into something. Which I of course pulled out from under the pillow, when I discovered what it was I of course freaked out and threw that thing across the room so fast. You could say he got the last laugh on that one. Thanks DAD!

He was my project king. In my eyes he could do anything! If it broke, he could fix it. Over the years, he has helped take many of my creative concoctions and ideas and turn them into a reality. From homemade wind chimes out of old silverware to window cornices for our living room to building decks, remodeling our house and most recently helping to design and build a new pool house. Basically you name it and he could do it! He was basically the brains and thought process to whatever project we were working on.

When my phone rings I keep thinking it is going to be dad. He had a knack for calling at the most inopportune times. He would call me in the middle of the day knowing I was working and was busy and the first thing he would say is “Are you busy?" and of course I would always reply with “Yes, can I call you later?” to which he would reply, “well just give me a minute” and his minute would usually end up being 15 minutes. He LOVED to talk and being retired he thought everyone had as much time as he did. I will miss your calls dad!!

I will carry with me all the great memories of you as my dad and as a doting grandpa to my daughters. You taught Belle how to drive and spent countless hours with her after school so she could practice driving in the daylight while Ernst and I were still working. She will forever cherish those moments she had with you. The girls loved to listen to your stories and loved when you took them to Dairy Queen for ice cream and only after you were gone did I find out that you did that many more times than I knew of and it was your little secret. It is times like that that make me so happy that they got that time with you. You were so proud of all of our accomplishments and you told us so on a regular basis. We all miss you so much dad!

You may be gone from us in body, but you will forever live on in our hearts and in our memories. We will make you proud dad and carry on your legacy! LOVE YOU DAD!

Love Tasha


Belle's Eulogy 4/13/19 (age 16)

Shared by Nikki Matheson on April 14, 2019

Gramps' Speech

Best friend, Mentor, Teacher, Fellow Jokester, Biggest Fan, Gramps. Like many people here today, Gramps touched my heart in a special way that’s shaped me forever. For those of you who don’t know, my name is Belle. I’m Barry’s second eldest grandchild and the oldest daughter of Tasha and Ernst Freyer. I have a few stories I’d like to share about moments I had with my Gramps and memories that I’ll always keep close to my heart. My first memory begins in October of 2017, the year I turned 15 and the year I learned to drive.

Nearly a year and a half ago when I got my drivers permit, Gramps DEVOTED his free time to teaching me to drive. Picking me up after school nearly everyday, he’d have me drive us around for hours and hours aimlessly traveling the streets of Apple Valley. Becoming a routine, we’d drive until we couldn’t drive anymore. Always ending our drives in my driveway, Gramps and I would sit in the car talking about life for so long the sun would start to go down or my parents would come home from work. I’d tell him things I didn’t tell my parents and he’d give me the most insightful and wise advice. He’d tell me stories of his life, never running out of crazy adventurous things to tell me. It made me feel safe. It made feel appreciated. And most of it made me feel loved. In return for the free driving and life lessons I got from him, I grocery shopped for him.  As a reward for getting his groceries, he’d always give me spare change to buy a treat. Of course that meant always getting him a treat too. Dark Chocolate Almond Joys. Except the only problem was we could never find them. So since then, for a year and a half, we’ve been on the hunt for a dark Chocolate Almond Joy. I’m still looking and I’ll continue to keep looking, but to tide him over until I do find one, I brought him a regular milk chocolate one for now.

My second story is about volleyball. I had a dream this year that has now become one of my greatest accomplishments, junior varsity volleyball. After countless summers of camps and many seasons on teams I struggled with, I finally achieved my dream of making my high schools JV volleyball team. But this long-awaited milestone however, was something I never could have done without the unconditional love and support of my Gramps. Years of driving me to and from practice, sitting on solid unforgiving bleachers for hours on end, believing in me even when I didn’t believe in myself, learning my teammates names just so he could cheer them on, and giving me pointers in the car on the way home, Gramps inspired me to keep pursuing my dream no matter the obstacle I had to overcome. Teaching me the value of hard work and perseverance, Gramps helped me reach my full potential just by being there for me when I needed him most. He was after all, my biggest fan. And now as I continue on to my next dream, varsity, I know he’ll be there to cheer me on every step of the way.

Finally, my last story is from the last time I ever saw him. Over at our house like always just before leaving for the night, my sister and I convinced him to take us to dairy queen for a treat. Hopping into his car, we all drove to the Apple Valley Dairy Queen laughing and smiling the whole way. The windows rolled down and all three of us anxious for our ice cream, we had the time of our lives in such a small moment. I didn’t realize it at the time, but that would be the Grandpa I'd always remember. A man who enjoyed every minute he spent with his grand kids and a man who spoiled us to no end just so he could see us happy. From now on, when I think of him I’ll think of moments like that last Sunday where the only thing that mattered was being together in the moment and bringing joy to each other’s lives. Now while he waits for us to join him someday, I hope this pack of cards keeps him occupied for the time being.

In the end, I wish I had gotten to say goodbye. I wish I could have spoken with him one last time. Heard his voice, felt his hug, seen his smile. I wish he could tell me one last time how much he loves me. I wish I could tell him one last time how much I love him. But, I know its okay. It’s okay because he would tell me all that was never necessary. He would say there was never a need because he’d always known that. The words never needed to be spoken. Having always reassured me he’d lived a full life, I think it’ll be easier for me to come to terms with everything. During our deep car talks he made sure I knew he was satisfied with his life and proud of the people he’d be leaving behind. Looking at it now, I think he told me this so that one day, I could find peace instead of pain. I could find happiness instead of sorrow. One thing I know for sure is that more than anything in life, Gramps wanted to take care of the people he loved. And I believe that telling me that was his way of taking care of me. As one of Barry’s eldest grandchildren, I feel incredibly lucky for having had the most time with him. Brilliant, kind, compassionate, and self-less, I learned more than anyone could ever hope to learn from one the most amazing men ever. I think each and every one of us will forever be grateful for the moments we shared with him. Best friend, Mentor, Teacher, Fellow Jokester, Biggest Fan, and Gramps don’t even come close to describing what this man meant to me. I could never describe how safe, loved, and appreciated he made me feel. A true renegade and one-of-a-kind, I know Gramps will forever be by my side because for as long as I have known, he always has been.