ForeverMissed
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Tributes
June 12, 2020
June 12, 2020
(Posted for Rabbi Harvey Tattelbaum by his daughter Kate)

I am Rabbi Harvey Tattelbaum. My wife Meryl and I first met Bernice in 1993, shortly after my daughter Polly had begun dating Bernice's son Gordon. Two years later, Bernice and her husband Ken, and Meryl and I became Machatunim (relatives by marriage). For 25 years we shared so many wonderful family celebrations Four highlights were the day Polly and Gordon were married and the births of their three children: Richard Wynter (named after Bernice's first husband), Pauley Rayn (named after my mother, Pauline), and Dory Quoya (named after Bernice's mother, Dora Braverman).

Bernice was a remarkable and fiercely independent woman. I have personally known this to be so and have read the tributes about Bernice that beautifully capture the strength and self-reliance she possessed throughout her life during happy times and in times of deep sorrow. My tribute to Bernice is of a slightly different nature.

In late August 2019, Bernice so unexpectedly took ill. Her beloved sons, David and Gordon, did all they could to help her regain her independence. But by early October, she was too frail and vulnerable to be on her own any more.

To keep her away from a facility and close to loved ones, Gordon and Polly took Bernice into their home in Pound Ridge, NY and that is where she remained for eight months, until her death. Never have I seen a family so tirelessly devoted and attentive to providing gentle care and concern for their Mother, Mother-in-law and Grandmother. She was safe, loved and comfortable there.

Through the cold dark winter, Bernice endured complex treatments with a familiar resilience we have long admired. Even as the illness became too big for her to fight anymore, Bernice not once ever lost her dignity or grace, her beauty and tenderness, the sparkle in her delicate green eyes, her ability to give love and to receive it, and to make people laugh and laugh herself. 

Her friends and family came to spend precious time with her. David, his wife Sarah and their son Ryan Benjamin (named after Bernice’s father, Benjamin Braverman) made trips from the West Coast to be with her and take her on special outings. 

She faded gently, lovingly and peacefully into that good night with Gordon's family beside her and David's family virtually beside her in California. We had a very small virtual ceremony for Bernice's sons and their families and two caregivers (Shelly and Dalva who were so lovingly intertwined in the caring process). Together we honored Bernice and blessed her for the amazing woman she was and for the incredible legacy she leaves behind.

May her memory be a blessing.

(Posted for Rabbi Harvey Tattelbaum by his daughter Kate)
June 3, 2020
June 3, 2020
Hi everybody. Just wanted you to know that each picture in the gallery has a caption which makes it come alive. Just tap on picture. Also there is a great video in the video section
May 31, 2020
May 31, 2020
I was so saddened to see that Bernice passed away. I have so many fond memories of her, going back to Sun Valley in the 1960s.  She was a great friend to my mom Barbara Feldstein for all these many years, and they stayed in touch until she died a year ago. She was an amazing woman who seemed to balance her career, family, and social life with ease.  This is such a difficult time to lose her -- sending warm thoughts and sympathy to your family.
May 29, 2020
May 29, 2020
Bernice and I had a very special relationship for which I will always be grateful. We met when our husbands were in Indian guides with two of our sons around 1967. A very private woman, I was able to earn her trust, even though anytime she shared anything it was prefaced with “please don’t tell anyone”

I have been asked to share a few memories as recently I wrote and shared a bunch with Bernice and her family.  In the last week of her life I was able to read some to her on the phone ,courtesy of Polly Schnell.

Two especially convey aspects of her personality. My husband ,Carl , died suddenly in September 1995 leaving me in shock. Bernice spoke to me every morning for a month helping me to get my day started before I was able to return to work. How incredibly kind. A few months later we went to a broadway show on a frigid day. I said to her that Carl would have dropped me at the theater. Her response “ the slave is dead”, in jest but showing her matter of fact demeanor.

My sister-in-law said it is now time to move ahead with the happy memories.
I am trying but it is no easy task. Rest In peace my dear friend
May 28, 2020
May 28, 2020
Bernice was a beautiful young girl, of 18 years, when I first met her at Camp Tagola, Sackett Lake, New York. We were both camp counselors, sharing the same bunk. How lucky I was to develop a life-long friendship with her. Although she lived in New Jersey and I lived in a Queens, New York, we made an effort to keep up our treasured friendship. Bernice was interesting, intelligent and fun to be with.
Her marriage to Dick was a beautiful, much too short, romance. After she lost Dick, she made quite a life-changing decision. She was going to go to law school. She was such a strong determined woman and succeeded as a wife, mother, grandmother and attorney, and whatever else she put her mind to. Her two beloved sons were always a joy to her. They are both very fine gentlemen who she was always so proud of.  
My memories of the times we were together include meeting in Manhattan, seeing a Broadway show, shopping and always enjoying the day. As the years passed and life took us in different directions, it was such a treat to be able to spend two hours every year (for the past six or seven years) together in Cape Cod. In those two hours we caught up on our lives and families. We always left each other knowing how treasured our friendship was.
It is with the saddest heart that I say goodbye to my dear friend. To her wonderful sons and their wives and children, just remember the beautiful and good woman your Mom was. She will be truly missed but will always bring a smile to my heart.
Sheila Lipkin

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