Boris had always loved the outdoors, winter and snow. Skiing incorporates all of that, so he was bound to love it. Every winter Boris organized cross country and downhill family trips. He enjoyed spending time in nature and fresh mountain air. He liked the speed, great workout, the thrill, and  the feeling of freedom when all worries and cares disappear and you are just in the moment. In this short family video Boris is skiing in Le Massif, a ski area in Quebec, in 2008.

After living in Canada for only one month we met a wonderful family, also from Ukraine, Anya, Boris and their daughter Maria. They immigrated three months before us. It happened to be that we lived in the same building, and our apartments were next to each other. Our children went to the same school, and Maria and Kyryl were even in the same class. We became life long friends with this family.

For few years we had a tradition for a Thanksgiving long weekend to rent a cottage by the lake, do hiking and cooking together, and swim in a cold lake. In this short video two Borises swim in the cold lake in October 2008. You can hear how Anastasia calls them "B and B" in the video.

Боря очень любил стихи. В детстве ему родители часто читали стихи, и многие стихи Боря знал наизусть. Даниил Хармс и Эдвард Лир были его излюбленными детских поэтами. Когда Боря стал папой, он с удовольствием читал детям свои любимые детские стихи, и даже пробовал сочинять сам.

В мае 1994 года у нас ещё было двое детей, но через месяц должна была появиться на свет Настенька, а ещё через шесть месяцев мы уезжали навсегда в загадочную Канаду. В это время у Бори родилось это стихотворение. Он его любил читать вслух детям, даже когда наши трое детей уже были взрослыми...

Один матрос матрёшку вёз

В подарок дочерям.

"Одну на всех?", шептали все,

"Какой позор и срам";

Но наконец наш Рик хитрец

Собрал всех поутру.

Матрёшку взял, верхушку снял,

И вынул ей сестру.

С меньшой матрёшкой тот же трюк

Проделал Рик хитрец,

И вот три куклы в ряд стоят,

Ну, Рик, ты - молодец!

Вот эту Кэтрин подарю,

Ту - Бэтси, соловью,

Ну а меньшую я отдам

Конечно крошке Сью!

In December 2013 Anastasia created a picture of Boris and me, and gave it to us for Christmas. She named it "Two Souls in the Universe". This picture is hanging on our bedroom's wall, and is one of my favourite children's art works.

Veronika often had to do sketches for her school, and once she made a sketch of Boris. We think it was about 15 years ago...

In June 2008 we went to Pennsylvania to meet with Boris's school friends who came from different countries to see each other. We stayed near Hickory Run State Park and one day decided to view waterfalls and hike the Shades of Death Trail. I noticed then an unusual name of the trail, but only now I feel that the name of the trail reminded us that we all must go through shades of death as part of the human experience. However, none of us expected it would happen so fast for Boris and Ira...

Boris enjoyed writing poems. He also wrote for Alpine Club of Canada Toronto Section Newsletter a couple of stories of his mountain adventures. However, there was only one time when Boris expressed himself in prose. He wrote a short story "Day of Love" in August 2017 when after many tests doctors suspected a cancer in his body. Although the biopsy was not done yet, it was still a shock, and now I feel that writing this story was sort of a preparation for the bad news. 

He emailed his story to children and wrote : "Kids, probably the first sign of old age - attempt at writing something pretentious".

Here is his story:

A Day in Love

(Almost a cliché)

Finally they met for dinner at a restaurant they both favoured.

The conversation they’ve been putting off for a long time out of fear it would turn into another fight, turned into a delightful journey down the memory lane. They both laughed shedding occasional tear, reminiscing on crazy adventures and escapades they had together.

After the dinner they went for a stroll along the quiet streets and a riverbank. It was a nice late summer evening when the air is still warm, but all heaviness and dampness has almost gone ready to be replaced by crisp and fresh light autumn breeze. Blotches of red and yellow have started popping here and there through the green foliage.

They decided to stay overnight at an old hotel they had stayed at many times in the past so it almost felt like home. Sipping on their hot tea they kept digging up more obscure episodes from the past, enjoying this slow conversation and a light banter. There was no need to rush through to finish it on time nor were they under any obligations to make any decisions or commitments. Just occasional smile over long forgotten inside joke they only had to utter the first few words. They were tired and didn’t stay up late.

Cleaning lady found them in the morning still holding hands.

Autopsy revealed nothing suspicious.

Love and life have their mysterious ways through the eternity.

The Christmas 2018 was the first Christmas without Boris. To remember him I decided to make a garland and decorate our fireplace. I collected all writings about Boris from Facebook and from the alpine club memory scrap book, which was given to him before his passing. Also, I sent an email to friends and relatives asking to write few words and feelings that reflect Boris' special qualities. Then I typed all writings and glued each of them onto long, narrow strips of colored paper, and formed interlinking loops with each piece to form a memory chain. Each time new guests came, I would ask them to add to the garland, and very soon it doubled in size!

Here are all the writings, first in English and then in Russian. 

Memory Garland

It has been a joy to get to know you and enjoy your humour and wit, to wait in anticipation to hear stories of your crazy adventures and unexpected overnights. Your warmth and kindness has always been a highlight of the trips we have been on together and we want to know how special you are to both of us. Love you dear Boris, Ron and Helen

Boris, you are slow and steady, not gets to obstination. Thinking of you. Ray Rutitis

I will never forget how much passion you had for being in the mountains with your family and friends trying to make it happen no matter what.With much love, Sandra

Having met you added another brilliant colour to the tapestry that is the amazing collection of people that I have come to know in the mountains. Thank you for being you. Cyril Shokoples

Boris, you’ve given so much but taken so little. Thanks for teaching me all the things, and thanks for being a great mentor and friend to all those you’ve touched.Your comrade always, Alex

Your positivity and enthusiasm inspire me. Wishing your every moment be filled with love and happiness. Danielle

Boris, you inspire many of us to go to High Places and do daring Things. Thank you. Ian

I have so many memories – remember when you made me dance for a pink soviet carabiner? Stories @ Bon Echo, your amazing example as a Lead on the rope leadership course! Amy

Boris, do you know what British mountaineer Doug Scott said about spending a night out high on a mountain in the freezing cold on an unplanned bivy with a partner? He said, “We spooned, but we did not fork!” Thankfully or regretfully we’ve never spooned together in the moutains.  Danilo

Boris, you brought us into Canadian mountains and rocks, and Alpine club. We were lucky to find you on Internet, and then in Bon Echo. Thank you, Naumovs

Boris, I learned a lot from you over the years – most importantly about the significance of being able to improvise, when necessary, with whatever skills and tools/equipment you have in your toolbox. Like many climbers – I like gear, but I keep that lesson top of mind. You have had such an impact on me and many climbers at the ACC. Your contribution to the club and the knowledge that you have shared with us is invaluable. You and your family will be in my thoughts. I am grateful to know you. Brenda

Boris, my brother, my climbing/dining companion, my rescuer from frostbite! My fellow journeyman of faith, my dearest friend! All my love, Bryan

My climbing teacher won't invite me to Bon Echo anymore. Without Boris, the sauna will be cold. He can't be replaced. He had a special place in my life. Michael

Hi Boris! It is Margaret from the ACC Toronto section. When I got the news that you’d passed away and left this planet behind, I started thinking about the metaphors we often use to describe this event...for example, it’s sometimes said one becomes “another light in the sky” or expression like ‘landing among the stars”. So, it’s most appropriate that the Alpine Club of Canada’s motto is “Sic itur ad astra” which in Latin means “Thus one journeys to the stars”, as quoted by Virgil in his book the Aeneid. So as you journey to the stars Boris, I send Blessings for a wonderful landing and thank you for all your contributions to the ACC. I remember a most poignant conversation we had after your chemotherapy treatment, when we compared notes about our drugs and our treatments and the side effects. You said it was exhausting and you didn’t know if you wanted to fight your cancer this way. And I said that we are not “fighting”, or “battling” our cancers, because if we lose, what does that mean? We didn’t fight hard enough? We didn’t try? We disappointed our loved ones? Rather? I believe the language around the cancer has to change to words like “living with grace” and “surrounding ourselves in love”. You didn’t lose anything to cancer Boris – you are loved, cherished, adored and admired – we have all won because you shared your grace, generosity and friendship throughout your life. May all the gods be with you until we meet again...   Margaret

Boris, as you well know – life is an endless sequence of choices, of decisions, of commitments... Choices – to marry, to emigrate, to mountaineer,… Commitments – to one’s spouse, one’s children, one’s family, one’s job, one’s interests – but –Time is Finite – and so choices and commitments are often in conflict for the time we have available – so we set (or rather are “nudged”) into Priorities - often on the basis of whom we will offend least or rather be forgiven (sort of) most easily (our spouse). Ten-fourteen day, high level traverses of Pamir etc. (with lousy gear) takes commitment but it is only to one self and the other guys... But your years (>12) on the Leadership/training Committee, on the Board, and running endless Section Day, weekend, long weekend, week long events – is not an Ego-trip, it is selfless service for others – to teach, to explain, to lead, to demonstrate, to encourage, to mentor, to enthuse, to be patient, to be empathetic, to guide, to suggest, to be an example – all this takes Time and Time is finite. You could have chosen to pursue your own goals, spent more time with your family – but they know you were doing something you are good at, that you enjoy, that is worthwhile – so they let you be. Rest assured there are Many Toronto section members who are endlessly grateful for the time you spent with them – they greatly appreciate your dedication to help them enjoy our local crags and our more distant mountains – you have done a fabulous job – helping others is blessed. As they would say in my native Yorkshire - “Boris, he’s a good man” - the highest accolade. Affectionate regards, Roger

He is kind, lovable, funny, and good grandpa.                  Ethyn

Boris, a life that touches others, goes on forever! We don’t say in grief he is  no more, but in thankfulness that he WAS. Miss and love you always forever. Nadia

My mountain guide. My guide in life. I’m so thankful for the wonderful journey we shared together. Forever in our hearts my father, my mentor and friend. Kyryl

I am grateful that Boris gave me Veronika, Isabella, and the mountains, and a living vision of what an amazing husband, father and grandfather should look like. Luke

The qualities I most admire in others, and in myself are ones my dad had. Humility, ambition, kindness, generosity. I identify in his strengths, and also in his struggles. That makes life challenges I encounter somewhat less lonely, because those are the moments I connect with my dad the most. Because I think “What would he do? What would he say?” And I feel his guidance. I have a whole life of memories with you, Dad, and a lifetime ahead of me where we would have made memories together. We can still do that, but they will be in a different form now. Anastasia

Гирлянда памяти

Когда я себя плохо чувствовала, папа, ты всегда присаживался рядом на кровать, клал тёплую руку мне на живот и взволнованным голосом спрашивал: «Сердечко болит?». Я всегда отвечала: «Нет». Теперь ты ушёл и впервые сердечко так сильно болит. И нет твоей тёплой руки. Вероника

Наш самый младшенький, самый чуткий, очень не хватает.   Миша, Оля Вингурт

Любил ты жизнь душою всей, рядом с тобой шёл успех всегда.

Ты добрым был ко всем, как мог, мне не забыть Бориса никогда.

Боря, внуки и дети - ты живешь в них. Ты приходи, мы будем рады.

Лучше во сне явись, поговорим. Не забывай о нас, не надо.

Мы любим, помним и стараемся не скорбеть. Таня Шевченко

Я всё время вспоминаю, как вы на соревнованиях вместе выступали по скалолазанию, и как мы к вам завалились в гости в Канаде, вы для меня всегда были и будете супер парой.  Валентина Писаренко

Ушел партнер и нет ему замены. Образовалась черная дыра. Я не могу найти себе другого. Он слишком много значил для меня. Миша Позин

Боря для нас не ушел, частичка его всегда с нами. Его пример учит нас понимать, что в жизни главное, а что второстепенно. Боря, настоящие друзья всегда помогают, даже когда им уже нельзя позвонить. Катя и Саша Мальцевы

Немногословен, ироничен, тонкого юмора и огромной доброты человек. Вова Шевченко

Вспоминаем, как Боря часто говорил шутливо: “Мамочка, не спешите!”. Не стираем его сообщение на автоответчике, слушаем иногда. Нешмонины

Насмешливо-бурчащий, курчавый и в очкаx.

Его встречали чащи и горы в облакаx...

Дружили, пели с детства и было - xорошо!..

А память - это средство дружить, когда ушёл. Миша Набедрик

В Торонто (Канада), в возрасте 58 лет ушел из жизни Борис Кащенко - один из лидеров Харьковского горного туризма 80-х, создатель и капитан спортивных команд по технике горного туризма, чемпион УССР и участник чемпионатов СССР по ТГТ. Более двадцати лет, после отъезда из Украины - лидер и председатель Горного клуба Торонто, удостоен в 2017 году Distinguished Service Award (Награда за выдающиеся заслуги) от Альпинистского Клуба Канады. Коля Фёдоров

Грустно. Безжалостная и тяжелая болезнь. Ушел из жизни добрый и хороший человек. Как быстро летит время. Казалось, совсем недавно студент ХАИ Б.Кащенко впервые выступил в Карпатах в составе сборной Харьковской области по ТГТ, капитаном которой был тогда Юра Стрельников. И вот давно уже нет Юры, а теперь и Бориса. Но осталась наша память …. Это и совместные походы и соревнования, подрастающие дети, совместные разработки устройств для систем управления и редкие наши встречи после отъезда семейства Кащенко в Канаду. Светлая память и наши соболезнования семье. Виктор Борискин - Дядя (так любил обращаться ко мне Борис), Светлана Носич

Да! Боря- это легенда! Благодаря ему ушла анархия и появилась системность в турклубе ХАИ. С Борей было интересно и весело. Спасибо Всевышнему, что он послал нам такого человека. Пусть земля будет ему пухом. Cергей Бобченко

А мне Боря запомнился самым интеллигентным туристом-горником в клубе... Светлая память. Сергей Кравченко

Добрая память. Хороший и смелый человек был. Витя Можейко

Он очень красивый был, твой Боря, и очень светлый изнутри. Вы оба невероятно красивы, удивительная пара. Вы светите и сейчас. Мне было очень больно, но в то же время радостно смотреть на вас...Спасибо тебе за то, что позволила прикоснуться к вашему свету...Он греет...  Маша Стащенюк (после просмотра песни о Боре)

Ты был и остаёшься самым близким, дорогим и любимым человеком на этой большой планете. С тобой я познала безусловную любовь, гармонию и радость. Мы вырастили трёх необыкновенных детей, объездили мир, исходили сотни километров троп, взобрались на горные вершины; пели, танцевали и готовили вместе; написали друг другу целые книги стихов. Ты всегда был лидером, учил меня доверять себе и следовать своему намерению. Ты вывез нашу семью в Канаду, купил дом, выплатил его, заплатил за образование детей, отложил деньги на пенсию, передал весь свой опыт ученикам в альпинизме и на работе. Ты отдавал своё время семье и горам – это были твои главные ценности. Благодаря тебе наша семья такая дружная и крепкая и мы всё время чувствуем тебя рядом с нами, в нашей памяти и в нашем сердце. Ты успел так много сделать за свою жизнь на Земле и мы продолжаем учиться у тебя упорству, творчеству, юмору, чуткости, любви, доброте. Ты всегда рядом с нами, пусть незримо, но очень ощутимо. Я чувствую твоё присутствие, твои мысли, твою любовь, и это будет продолжаться вечно.   Рита

Боря всегда заботился о своей семье. Когда я приехала в гости к вам в Канаду, Боря меня предупредил: «Рита не ест мясо. Пожалуйста, не подкладывайте ей». А когда я в канадском магазине засомневалась в том, что гречка в пакете с надписью «кошерная» является действительно кошерной, Боря сказал, что  он может озолотиться, если попросит проверить гречку и она окажется некошерной. (воспоминания о Боре тёщи Галины Михайловны).

Боря – молодец, вывез всю семью в цивилизацию. Помню, как он любил всё контролировать. Когда я решил рассказать 5-летней Насте сказки перед сном, сел  возле её кровати, и стал рассказывать, то заметил, как Боря стоит у двери и слушает, что ж это там дед рассказывает. (воспоминания о Боре тестя, Кирилла Семёновича)

У Бори были трепетные, нежные и тёплые глаза. Он улыбался глазами. Он был тёплый и улыбчивый. Наташа Калинина

On Boris' one year death anniversary Anastasia created a short video using our family video filmed 21 years ago. In 1997 we rented a cottage and stayed there for a week. We had no Internet at that time and found out about this cottage from Toronto Star newspaper. We had a great time swimming, canoeing and watching sunsets from the dock. Anastasia was 3 years old and she remembered how Boris took care of her, and how gentle and kind he was...

To mark one year of Boris' passing I invited different groups of friends every weekend in February. We shared  Boris' favourite meal and held a remembrance ceremony. During the ceremony everyone took turn sharing memories about Boris and lit a candle. Then we sat by the fireplace and watched a slideshow. I used one of Boris' favourite song and his photos to make this slideshow.

In March 2014 Boris and I attended a couple retreat near Peterborough, Ontario. We were asked to create a Manifesto - a description in 7 points of what connects us as a couple. Here is a slideshow that I created.

For the Halloween party we got together with friends in our house couple of times. Everyone was supposed to wear a costume and prepare poems or songs that go along with it. In October 2015 Boris and I picked a famous russian song about a sailor and fisherwoman who fell in love, and created costumes.The name of a song is Shalandy Polnye Kefali (Scows Full Of Mullet). Here is a translation of the song that we sang:

Scows full of mullet,

- I will not speak to you for all Odessa,

And now watch our dance!

Boris loved to make us laugh. One of his jokes was to play with presents. While traveling Boris always bought little presents for all of us. When he returned home we would have a dinner first and then it would be a time for presents. Boris would put all the presents in a bag and mix it with dirty socks and old underwear. Then, one member of the family would cover their eyes with a blinfold and pick a present from a bag, and Boris would say who it is for. We all laughed when someone got dirty socks before getting an actual present. When children grew up they played the same trick on Boris. Here is a picture of Boris getting an old underwear before getting his present from his son Kyryl (2011, December celebrations)

It was Halloween 2016 and we had a party in our house. Boris and I decided to sing a famous russian song "Govoryat mi byaki buki" about robbers and create costumes that go along with it. Here is the translation of the song:

The Song of the Robbers

When we get together with friends we often like to prepare some jokes, songs, poems or dances to have a little concert after dinner. When we got together for the Old Christmas Day in January 2017, Boris  and I decided to create a short hawaiian dance. We visited Hawaii in summer 2015 and fell in love with hawaiian music and nature. After a trip to the dollar store we got our dance grass skirts and neck garlands. Then we found a popular hawaiian christmas song and added few moves. Here is our dance!