These are reflections I made last week about our childhood together:

If you’re lucky enough to have a sibling you get along with, then it means you get to have a playmate around all the time. I remember building a lot of things with him.

We would create the most epic couch forts by pushing all the couches together and arranging the pillows to create ceilings. You needed a flashlight to go through them.

One time we built an actual igloo – it took several hours – and once finished, Brian insisted on pushing our cat Amanda in on a sled.

Brian had a toolbox full of legos, and we would spend hours together building new kits, and creating huge cities out of them.

We played hours and hours of videogames, including Zelda, Clayfighter, Warcraft, and Civilization II, which involved building a nation of people (I remember choosing the Egyptians a lot) throughout the centuries, increasing their armies to fight other nations, having them learn how to make new inventions, create cities and roads, etc.

One time when we were living in Turkey, we re-created the world of Warcraft in our backyard, where the snowmen were Orcs, we were the humans, and we even had catapults (made out of picnic benches) to fling snowballs with. I believe our white house ended up with tons of mud ball splats on it that day.

When we were growing up, Brian was the brave and adventurous one, and I was the wimpy one. For example, we would go to a lot of amusement parks as children. A common obstacle for him was being too short to ride; meanwhile, I cried after one of those rapids river boat rides. I refused to go on rollercoasters after a particularly terrifying ride on the Scooby Doo coaster at Kings Dominion. By the time I got over my fear and could ride on coasters with Brian, he was more interested in reading than talking to his chatty sister in line. He had already mastered waiting in line by then.

Brian was always willing to pick up creatures, whether it was crabs, spiders, pigeons, bugs of all shapes and sizes. He loved sharks, and really enjoyed going to sea world, where he once put his hands in the water and picked up a stingray (I can’t remember if he was allowed to do that)—meanwhile, I was convinced my grandma’s pool had invisible sharks in it and avoided the deep end when they were feeding.

When we would go fishing in Florida at our grandparents’ house, I could never hook my shrimp because their snapping mechanism that proects them from pedators totally worked on me; Brian seemed to enjoy the challenge.

In Venice, Brian chased after pigeons and actually caught one. One landed on my head, perched on my new Captain’s hat I had just bought at the tourist stand, and pooped on my head.

On skiiing trips, Brian quickly upgraded to Black Diamonds, whereas I could barely handle the blue intermediate hills. A particularly memorable trip involved Brian hanging 20 feet in the air from a ski lift from his ski pole, which had gotten snagged. I think he was skiing the next day. Brave guy!

Having Brian as a brother also meant I had a co-worker; we could complain about “the bosses” (our parents, grandma, etc.), get into mischief behind our parents’ back.

I remember one day Brian making sure I knew all the cuss words (I may have insisted on this knowledge).

Brian loved horror movies, and even though I was definitely too young to watch them (7), he would let me hang around and enjoy such 80s classics as Arachnophobia, Pet Cemetery, Leprechaun, and Chucky.

Almost every Christmas we would reminisce about how our paternal Grandmother would force us to eat mushrooms, EVEN THOUGH WE DIDN’T LIKE MUSHROOMS.

We would make fun of our mom’s “troll-like” dancing.

How unfair our time-outs were, and when Dad would accuse us of crocodile’s tears.

How mom didn’t understand how amazing The Simpsons was because she happened to walk in on us watching the episode where Sideshow Bob is trying to kill Bart (arguably one of the best episodes).

Putting the cats into laundry bags, then carrying them to another part of the house and letting them out, and laughing at how confused they looked when they came out.

I think what was really unique about Brian was that even as an adult, he still had a childlike spirit. I always appreciated his desire to make Christmas special – he would insist we make a fire, put on tunes (although I usually insisted on Christmas music, which he did indeed hate), put the presents around the decorated tree, and the presents in the morning was a big deal. He would call me months in advance to ask what I wanted (he did that for birthdays too). This past Christmas, he insisted Dave and I go ice-skating with Mari—it was ridiculously fun!

As I’m getting older, I realize that it becomes harder and harder to be amongst people willing to bring the Christmas spirit. Since I always appreciated it in Brian—and I think having a childlike spirit is an incredibly freeing and creative life to live—I am going to try to be more like him with my family, with Dave, with my friends, and with strangers. I think we all appreciate these types of people, even if we don’t acknowledge it.

A WORD FOR BRIAN

Brian touched the lives of so many people. He moved through the world with his own struggles but he never lost the capacity to reach out to others.He never forgot their needs too. This was evident in the care he lavished on his grandmother, Marie, as he helped the other members of the family look after her in her last years.It was a beautiful testament to the love that Brian encountered in the home of Dale and Jon.We were privileged to know him as a little baby as he opened up the world of parenthood for his mother and father.Eventually his sister, Diana, came along to complete the circle of love that was their home.Our own children arrived at more or less the same time and it was always a great joy to see them, all playing together with their toys and games on periodic visits together.In many ways what made Brian special was that he never lost that bright fascination of childhood.His connection with the world of the child never quite left him.

It was fun to meet Brian because he always brought some exciting new adventure. When he and Jon came to our house for a Fourth of July celebration, everyone had gathered to watch the fireworks from our deck.The town of Chesapeake Beach was going to let them off from two barges out in the bay.But it was typical of Brian that he came already prepared with his own entertainment.He and his dad had bought the kind of starbursts and shooting bombs that one could not get in Montgomery County.They relished the freedom of being able to let them off in the backyard.So, long the before the official show, Brian was carefully setting up the spectacle.Our visiting grandkids, who had also come from more restrictive jurisdictions, were thrilled to have such an up-close viewpoint on the exploding excitement that is what the evening was all about.When the official show started it was almost like an anti-climax.Brian had scooped the whole thing in his own unique brand of mad cap technical prowess.It was no wonder that he graduated to the art form of fire-dancing, where he could turn himself into the pyrotechnic event.

That is surely how we want to remember this dear and beautiful boy. He was his own veritable shooting star.And even if, like such bursts of luminescence, he blazed way too soon, we know that for the brief time he was among us that he cast a bright flash against the darkness.Now he has stepped behind the veil that for the moment hides him from our view.Yet he is not gone, for he carried within a flame that will not go out.Having once burned so brightly he remains inextinguishable.The love that he carried within, and that all who knew him recognized, cannot be extinguished.Brian flashed briefly in our lives and he remains in that brilliance that is the point at which we touch the eternal.Indeed we have no confirmation of the eternal dimension of things if not for an unmistakable sense that love alone endures.One does not have to be a Christian or a believer to know that our lives are bounded by the transcendent.We live at the point of intersection of the timeless with time, as T.S. Eliot phrased it.This is why we celebrate the life of Brian Hill.We are in his debt for the gift he brought to all of us who knew him as he carried that timeless moment into our lives.Through him we see that love is stronger than death and that Gabriel Marcel was correct in his observation about love. “To say, ‘I love you,’ means you will never die.”

You might might say enjoying life to the max.

Always so fun!

I wish I had taken this pic with his larger jacket I got him for xmas. But he did look good on this bike. We would have been riding together this summer.

You might say he liked to play with light!

Always so spontaneous!

Though he didn't actually like this photo,  I was very fond of it. I took it with my phone. He was always so handsome to me. This photo says it all. It is how u remember him the best; so beautiful!

I think he caught me off guard in front of the camera.  He was always spontaneous and fun in that way.

Brian always knew when people were being mistreated. His heart always went out to those who were wronged. When I took him to the 2017 Trangender Day of Remembrance (TDOR) he cried after hearing the stories of people bordered for being transgender. He simply cared for everyone!

When Brian laughed and smiled he'd brighten any room like a beaming stage light!

Brian was always so loving. He was always close and quick to comfort. We got along so very well, like buddies all the time.

As a single person, it can be hard when you need help.  I had two impacted wisdom teeth.  I had surgery and needed a ride home and someone to monitor me.  In spite of telling the dentist about my past problems with opiod based drugs, he still prescribed one for the post op recovery period.  My surgery took an hour longer than anticipated so Brian had to wait over an hour in the waiting room.  Then he drove me to the pharmacy to fill the prescription and went back to my place.  I ate soup and ice cream and we watched a movie while I was very much in pain.  I took the prescription.  I got some sleep.  Sadly, Brian was afraid to take his sleep medicine because it knocks him out, but can't really sleep without it.  So he was basically up all night watching out for me.  About 8:00 am, I figured I was fine and sent him home to sleep.  (I actually wasn't fine, but neither of us could have know that and he would have stayed longer if I had asked him to.)

On another occasion, I stopped to air up my tires on my bike and I set down back pack and started to ride away and realized I forgot my back pack and before I went back it was gone.  I had my keys, wallet and cell phone in the back pack.  Someone stole the back pack and took out the cash (about $20) and left everything else on a bus.  A guy saw the thief discard the back pack, found my phone and started calling people.  He got my ex-husband, but at least I found my wallet.  Brian was willing to drive to a not so nice part of town to pick-up the back pack.  That was very sweet of him.

As his older cousin by ten and a half years, Brian was my very first babysitting job.  Which, though I probably didn't look after him until he was a couple of years old still, put me at very young for the task.

I remember one time, I'm not sure how old Brian was, maybe two, and he was romping around the house in full-length footie-pajamas, when the piano bench fell over on his foot.  Naturally he was crying his head off, because it hurt like crazy!

I remember thinking, "Yeah, I know!  A stubbed toe REALLY hurts, but then it goes away," and I told him so, and tried to comfort him.  When he wouldn't stop crying, I agreed to look at it... remember he's in a one-piece footie pajama, so it's kind of an ordeal to get him in and out of all the way down to the toes.

When I finally got his foot uncovered, I was horrified to discover his big toe was all bloody!  It was all I could do to keep from freaking out, but that's why you always get a phone number... I called Dale right away!

I felt so bad that I didn't take his pain seriously enough at first, but I know it all healed up in the end, since I'm pretty sure he didn't lose the toe or anything.

The Class Clown by Brian Hill

Setting: The Lab School of Washington

Characters:   
    Ryan Hill, aka Double Agent Brian Hill, 10 years old  
    Jamal Austin, 10 years gold, black, best friend of Ryan Hille 
    Blaine Gretzky, Wayne Gretzky's son aka Blaine's World  on "Party on, Blaine"
    Ms. Brandon, yuoung, plain looking, She's easy on kids at first but if the kids got worse, she got much tougher, teacher. 

    One day in Ms. Brandon's class, I almost feel asleep when I felt someone putting earphones on my ears. Then I heard a knob turned on just as I was going off to sleep. In the middle of the  geography lessons, Bill & Ted's music came on full blast! It was so loud that I had to get someone else to hold me to stop the vibrations. 

"Gotcha!" Ryan said and burst out laughing. 

"You didn't have to put it on full blast" [Blaine] said. 

But they weren't on full blast, Blaine" he said, They were on normal level". 

Suddenly I heard the teacher ask, "What 's going on?!?"

I was just trying to wake him up, " Ryan said innocently. 

Ms. Brandon said "He was falling ASLEEP?" 

"Yup" Ryan said. 

Ms Brandon said  "Keep the earphones on him and whenever he falls asleep, turn it on full blast!!

Ryan was always pulling tricks and causing trouble. No matter what, he would laugh out loud.  Once he even put a water balloon on the teachers' seat. He had to go to the principal's office for that, though. And when the teacher asked him to clear out his desk, he pulled  out all of his practical jokes. He's one crazy kid! He's been sabotaging our class all  year. It's like he' s a secret agent whose [sic]  been trying to get the teacher and us all  year! 

it was finally the end of the year. It was time to pass out the awards for the "most Improved" and all that. Ryan got the awards: "Most Obnoxious Kid of the Year," "Most Weight Loss", and "Silliest Kid in the Whole School". As Ryan went up to the alter [sic] in the gym to say thank you to everybody, he snuck a soda-pop out of his pocket and drank it down . Then he belched right into the microphone. The sound echoed all thorugh the room! Everyone burst out laughing except for the girls and some of the  teachers. 

"There he goes again" thought Jamal to himself. Jamal knew everything that Ryan did because he was his best friend and they were both in Ms. Brandon's class. 

Ryan announced "I am not really a student in Ms. Brandon's classs. I am  Double Agent Brian Hill, BH7."

Everyone gasped except for Ms. Barron's class because he  was in their class last year. He was sent to sabotage Ms. Brandon's class.
 
Did you get the information on the Science Project?" Ms. Barron's class asked. 

"yes," he said and he ran up to Ms. Barron. 

Then I realized that Brian had been in our class just to  get some information for the Science Fair. Although their copying the project didn't count in the Science Fair, Ms. Barron awarded Brian 10 bonus proints for a job well done. 

The End. 

I had just gotten out of surgery.  Brian wanted to Danica Roem speak. She is the first transgender woman elected to the VA Senate. Brian was always a supporter of human rights movements.

Yes, that's Brian at age 35 emerging from the sliding board/tube at the "Sonic" we encountered on the way home from the eclipse. We wanted to see the waiters on roller skates, but Brian snuck off to the playground. He went up the stairs to the sliding Board/tube with a daring demeanor... but emerged looking sheepish.  He really almost got stuck! 

This is a picture of Brian in the back yard about 2013. Brian liked the outdoors and always looked for a reason to be there. One time after a snow, he set up a tray table on the front porch and ate tomato soup there. He was also handy.He  assembled a metal rocking chair for me in the backyard. He took good care of our garden, particularly the roses, and rid our backyard of poison ivy.

This was a family photo at Brian's graduation from Newport High School. Father Jon Hill wasn't absent, he just left early for tennis.

In the ceremony, every single student gave a talk, which was supposed to be short and sweet, but it wasn't well policed, so it was a VERY LONG ceremony, and there was no air-conditioning, which Grandma Hill remarked on several times. But it was worth it-- In his speech,  Brian thanked us, his parents, profusely and eloquently for making it possible to him to transfer from the local public school which allowed him to hide and under-perform in the back of large classes, to this private school which had a British disciplined principal (and required school uniforms), with smaller classes. Brian's GPA went up and he was accepted at all 7 colleges to which he applied. (Regrettably, Newport High School no longer exists.)

Before Brian graduated from high school, we did a family cruise to Hawaii. Brian couldn't resist mimicking this tropical statue of a warrior with  unforgettable eyebrows not unlike his own and his seeming challenge to the world.

Brian usually was the one to don the Santa hat and give out the presents (unless the youngest cousin really wanted the role). Brian played very well with the cousins, and treated  them as the intelligent beings they are, especially when discussing the intricacies and wonders of his favorite subject, biology.

A story famous in our family is how Brian's Uncle Mac discovered no mail coming to his house for about a week and linked it to an 'infestation of bees'. He sought Brian's help --who  had actually done a school report on the very subject-- Brian identified them as not bees but cicada-eating  'killer wasps' who are extremely docile, though they look dangerous. 

Both the "biology major"  and "informed layperson, former Boy Scout" referred to in the following extracts are Brian.

QUOTE

"I have an an infestation of what I have been informed (by a biology major who has had a course in entymology and takes a special interest in large wasps) are cicada Killer wasps and can supply a specimen....

...Although I suspect you have specimens from the Washington, DC area... I am anxious to have a positive identification since the Post Office has suspended mail delivery  to my house and am anxious to have it resumed.

Below is an account written when I thought they were "bees" sent to the Washington Post (in hope that bad publicity might get mail delivery resumed)."
___________________________________________________________

"I recently noticed no mail had come for about a week and went by the post office to inquire. I learned because there were bees on the lawn the postman was unwilling to deliver mail and about a third of a box had accumulated... 
 
...I talked to a supervisor who said she had been there ... but was afraid to go to the door to tell me mail delivery could not be made. According to her (and my observation confirms this), the bees appear to have a nest in the ground near a utility pole at one corner of the property. The "dangerous animals" ...presence is not due to anything I have done but have wondered in from outside the property (a typical suburban house next to River Road...)
  
...The supervisor's suggestion was to hire an exterminator. Besides the expense, the situation raises a problem for me since the bee's nest appear to be on property I do not own (county owned I assume).  And it is not clear I have the legal right to spray, use poison, or what ever is needed to kill bees....
 
...While the bee density is high I have not had other visitors or deliverymen complain. Fed Ex and Parcel Post for instance appear to be willing to take the risk... 
 
...I came here due to my New Orleans house being under water due to Katrina and possibly those with Louisiana experience are more willing to risk the presence of "dangerous animals" than those in suburban, DC....
 
...Of course bees are rather common...  My understanding (informed layman, ex Boy Scout) is bees do not sting unless attacked or stepped on. I have had bee stings in my youth from walking barefoot on lawns in Richmond, Va.  and while painful, they were not too serious. Postmen do not go barefooted...
 
...I was somewhat disappointed the post office did not somehow find a way to reach me (I am in the phone book, and you could see who the mail was addressed to ...) Of course they could put someone in protective clothing and have him walk up the sidewalk to leave a message or knock on the door.
 
...Incidentally, ...if the [danger of] the bees' roadside nest  is really so great as to make it unsafe for a postman to walk down the street or up my entrance sidewalk (which does not pass the apparent nest), it would affect a rather large number of pedestrians coming from buses etc. I have noticed no signs of fear in pedestrians using the street.
 
From
Edward M. Miller
UNQUOTE

I met Brian only briefly..  I did not know him.  But I knew of him.  And everything I knew was wonderful. Brian’s little sister, Diana, was a dear school friend of my daughter’s, Amanda.  Brian was sometimes home when Amanda and Diana spent time together and it is not every big brother who is kind and friendly to his little sister’s friends.  But, Brian was.  Amanda would tell me that Brian was nice; that he would play video games with her and Diana; that he was kind; that he did not tease or make her feel unwelcome; and that he was funny.  Amanda has good instincts about the important things in people and in life.  I was and remain grateful to Brian for his sweet temperament and his generous heart.

"I loved Brian very much! We had many dreams and plans together. I considered him my soul mate. 

In West VA, he helped me pick a piece property we were going to build a retirement home on. He was planning to take a motorcycle class and we were saving to buy him a bike so we could ride together this summer. We knew Dale wanted grand kids so he developed a fertility plan we could use; after all he was a fine Biologist. Clearly, we were becoming life partners.

I met Brian at a group gathering in a personal growth group. He was very strong and confidence then, a man of great faculty, stamina, dreams, and aspirations. After all, he could fearlessly control fire and safety was always top on his mind. He had a certain beautiful smile I called a smolder in recognition of the fire inside him. His enthusiasm for life was contagious. It brought me and many others up. He also operated only from the heart, always honest, loving, and concerned for me and his friends. He had many friends who adored him. He was, you might say, adorable. He was on top of his life game. He owned my heart almost immediately. 

But he struggled with his job as a biology lab technician. I spent many night consoling him. When he would tell me he felt outcast at work, I would tell him, "Show them your beauty, let them see your heart, and they will adore you as I do"! When he became depressed after losing that job around Xmas time, a would hold him and tell him, "Just hang on to me as tightly as you can baby. This will pass and we will get through it together, you and I!" Every night, I would hold him in bed, and I would tell him, "You are my beauty. You make me beautiful. You make the worrld beautiful. I love you!". Ultimately, in his death, I believe he felt comforted at my house and he knew I would be there to comfort him. In some odd but loving way, I am honored he died at home with me.

I was raised Christian so the notions of heaven and hell were ground into me. But with Brian, the Christian teaching were turned on their head. Though Brian did not believe in heaven, I know in my heart god took him there quickly. I have a sixth sense in matters of this sort and I am 100% convinced. I also have some sense for reincarnation though I do not know the teachings of the Budda. I believe that it is the evolved souls that over time choose the hardest life incarnations. When I looked into Brian's soul, I saw one of the most evolved, kindest, and loving souls I have ever known. If he is reincarnated, he is bringing beauty and happiness to the world and those he touches as he did to me.

Rest in piece my beauty, my sweet love. I know we will meet again in heaven or on earth. I will know your soul when I see it. It will stand out as a shining light of beauty and love."

Brian appreciated good art. At Patriot's Point, where we saw the eclipse, Brian was quite taken with this statue, and asked me to take pictures of it from almost all angles. A  mother gently cradling the equipment and clothing of a fallen soldier. He loved the fact that there were fresh roses placed on the statue. It was at the center of a circular War memorial.

This is a picture of the "Mortal Kombat" part of the Fire spinning show we went to together during the Capital Fringe Festival. Brian really enjoyed the show, since this is one of his own skill areas. Since a different spinner wins the battle every night (possibly), one could go back and see it several nights in a row and have a different experience each time.  But, we could only get organized to partake once. Which makes it all the more precious.

As a family, we have always enjoyed miniature golf. Unfortunately, there aren't many places in the DC area. This is one of the indoor courses with black lights, and trick holes where wind blows from secret places right behind the hole, blowing your ball away. Diana has on "monster fingers" she got with the chits we won playing skee ball. Brian and Dale (mom) also took nephews David, Eric, Adam and Matthew Miller mini-golfing both indoor and out every now and then.

Having arrived in Charleston, South Carolina around sunset, we (Brian and I) set out to find the best place for viewing the eclipse. We thought we had a tip from Jeannie (aunt), but what she mentioned turned out to be a very large neighborhood and a bit vague so Brian and I got on the computer and picked three sites to check out. Of course, it was dark, which made it hard to be sure how to compare the places,  but we settled on Patriot's Point, a major tourist place with several  large parking lots.  We figured there would be a huge crowd and determined to get there really early the next morning to secure a parking spot and take food, and books to read to pass the time. (Eclipse was due arond 2:00 pm).  This picture was taken at one of the OTHER spots which was a little known walk-bridge with marshes on either side, at the end of a long, thin road which ran through a residential area. I would have loved to have watched from this spot, and told Brian we were sure to be able to find a  place to park in front of someone's house, but he wasn't sure about the legality of all that, and as he said "if the car gets towed, we won't have ANY  transport", so we opted for Patriot's Point. As it happened, when we got there, there were plenty of spots free, so we called Jeannie to come there, as that was where we would stay. The only issue was that there was a large bridge, so we made sure we placed our chairs at a place where the bridge would not block the sun. Of course, the one thing we forgot, and that all the guides to the event did not cover, was the trajectory of the sun across the sky as it rose from the early morning to the point of the eclipse. So we ended up having to move our chair around, about every hour, and since it was brutally hot, finding a shady spot was a real challenge during this continuous dance with the sun. And there were clouds, and we feared we wouldn't see the total eclipse at all. But just before the awaited hour, the sun broke through the clouds! Magnificent! So glad I shared it with Brian, a scientist.

Wow, this was back in 2011.  So long ago, I can't believe it. 

My frends Adam, Carla and Bill are members of a sailing club on the Chesapeake Bay.  So I invited Brian on one of the sailing trips.  It ended up being a saga of a day.

He picked me up at 8:00 am and we drove to the dock.  His car broke down about a mile from the dock.  Bill stopped to help.  Brian asked Bill to give me a ride to sailing and he would stay behind and deal with his car.  However, Bill said, the car was safe where it was and he should come sailing with us anyway and deal with the car at the end of the day.

So we went sailing.  As you can tell by the photos, the sailing was good and swimming in the pool afterwords was enjoyable and refreshing. 

After that, Brian, Adam and i were in the shower house (several seperate shower rooms) and we were getting ready to go out to dinner.  Carla, Sarah and Bill were on the boat straightening up and going through the close down checklist.  Then a huge storm came through.  It was a wall of water.  It was the kind of rain, even if we had an umbrella, we would have gotten wet.  So we waited in the shower house waiting for the storm to pass.  Then lighting struck the house boat at the entrance to the C dock.  So now there was a fire separating us from the friends on the boat.  We could not get to our friends on the boat and they could not get to us as emergency vehicles came to deal with the emergency.

I had only slept about 4 hours the night before, so i took a key to Adam's car and took a nap in the front seat.  I was so tired I fell asleep during a thunder storm, with emergency crews all around and then the storm broke and Annapolis set off their fireworks.  Finally, Brian knocked on the door and handed me a sandwich. 

So I went back to the boat.  The plan to go to a restaurant was replaced with eating leftovers out of the refrigerator.  We chatted a bit, then Bill said, well it is time to deal with your car.  So Brian called AAA and we went to his car.  It only took about 10 minutes for the tow truck to arrive.

The saga wasn't over.  The tow truck driver has two 20 year old asian women in the car.  These women were abandoned by their dates in the middle of nowhere.  They needed to get back to Rockville and the driver asked if he minded if they rode with them in the cab.  So Brian rode back to Rockville with two drunk women on his lap.  Bill gave me a ride home.  I arrived home a few minutes before midnight. 

Who knew so much could happen in just one day. 

Ear to ear grin the whole ride, every time!

He was a gentle kisser. I was making sure my camera was working for the passerby we asked to take our picture. Loved his captain hat that he also put a Santa hat over it, you may notice if you look closely. He wore that all over the Meadowpark Garden shop then accidently walked out with it. I reminded him at the car and he ran back to return it.

In this picture, Brian is taking a mask-making workshop with Matt McGee of Constellation Theatre with me, his Mom, Dale Hill. The masks are simple-- made of cereal boxes, masking tape, a simple base mask from any old arts store, and paint. This was right before Halloween of 2017, after Brian had tried to "bake" a mask from some sort of dough and it had cracked in several places. So he LOVED that this mask was working. Matt McGee is from a several-generation puppeteer family that knows Jim Henson.

This was when Brian said "Wow, Mom, you got it right 3 times!" ( This made three times I had identified  activities for him that we could do together that were actually to his taste and up his alley). This was the third. 

The first and second were at the Capitol Fringe Festival. Brian always told me resolutely he HATED live theatre. (Flashback-- to maybe 2011? He  "conceded" to go to the play of my choice as a birthday gift (of course with me paying). Apparently, that time I picked one not to his taste -- Synetic's "Animal Farm" which-- he said--  had a lot of annoying chickens which drove him crazy. He was well read and I am sure knew George Orwell, and he always liked science fiction and horror and had a dark side so I thought he would  like it. Oh well.)

Back to 2017-- I alerted him to two shows at the fringe-- one was a Fire Spinning  show, "8 Bit Circus Sh*t" at a Farm market amphitheatre kind of place. The ad said "you know its serious when they assign a person to "watch out for body fires". The sequence linked the fire spinning and other fire battles loosely to video games which Brian knew well -- Mortal Kombat, Silent Hill, and Pyramid Head. Brian loved it when the latter appeared. (Brian built his own version of the Pyramid Head mask, which we displayed  at his memorial service).  

The other Fringe show was Trey Parker's "Cannibal! The Musical!"  by South Park Creators.  I texted Brian the address, but apparently he got confused and went to to the wrong quadrant of DC, so he texted me and I gave strict instructions to the usher to let in a young man expected to be about ten minutes late. So apparently, when he found out he was way far away, he  hopped out of the cab and started running to the theater. He missed about 40 minutes, but unbeknownst to me, had seen it on youtube, so was not worried at all. He LOVED it (as did I-- a great production). 

So -- although it is safe to say that his tastes-- at least as an adult-- intersected mine  perhaps rarely and right at the edge-- I am sooo glad we found some that appealed to both of us.  I'm glad I "got it right!" -- and three times, no less,  this very last year (Plus the eclipse, which makes four). We miss you, Brian!

When we lived on Capitol Hill, we were in a babysitting coop. Everyone got "chits" for a certain number of hours of babysitting and it was a one to one ratio. You babysit one hour for a child, you get one hour in return. 

Well, one day, a tall lanky man came over to babysit, with a large bag. I should have been wary right away. I introduced him to Brian (about 3?), and Jon and I went out. 

When we came back, we found Brian -- and the wall -- covered with shoe polish  with  scissors on the floor, and the blinds hanging down,  the strings obviously cut in several places. 

I came out to the next room and confronted the so-called babysitter-- "What were you doing?"  I demanded.  "I thought  I'd make a start on my taxes" he stammered. Trying to understand, I finally asked "How old is your kid?"  and he said "About 6 months" -- Oh, I thought, as it sank in. HIS kid was  still in the crib, immobile, blissfully ignorant of all the possibilities of terror s/he could wreak. 

As I recall, we didn't punish Brian. Who could blame him? He was just being creative. From then on, we were more selective for our babysitters!

This is actually just a dark picture of his fire pit at Spin Time. I guarantee, if there is a flame, trust Brian is nearby.

I could always count on Brian to help me summon cosmic powers.

I think it made him feel alive.

He made this mask out of cardboard, aluminum foil tape, and some red wheel paint. He needed it for firespinning that night. He loved masks though when he spun with them, it scared the hell out of me. I think he liked scaring me that way just a bit.

Few men will ever ride with a girl. He was not overly macho which is what I loved about him. For Xmas, I actually bought us WWII military helmets and pilot goggles. We road with them to the 2018 Womens March and everyone honked and cheered at us. We were always a real hit together on the bike.

Brian loved the lights at the Medowlark Gardens in Vienna VA.

On his blog he wrote, "me at my happiest"! I shared his sentiment.

Brian loved this Lamborghini! I reminded him. Everything is possible.

These are lovely flowers provided by my cousin Bob McNutt and his wife Katie. Brian and I went to see the rare country-wide eclipse at the point in Charleston S. Carolina where it was a total eclipse for about 2.15 minutes. We stopped in North Carolina to visit and stay with Bob McNutt and have dinner with him and Katie,and  brian's cousin Alec Frane (working there with FEMA) and my sister Jean Frane, who went on with us to Charleston. We had a great steak dinner with Bob and Katie,  and Brian loved  the "peter rabbit" sheets on the old fashioned bed he slept in at Bob's house. He took pictures of the sheets.