. . . . . . . . . . . . ~~ Eulogies and Vignettes ~~
November 3, 2019
by Paul Cook
"As long as you are spoken of, you are with us"
"With Six You Get Eggroll"
October 11, 2020
by Paul Cook
We all know what Chinese food is... right? With it's bean sprouts, water chestnuts, and fortune cookies. Szechuan, Mandarin, or Cantonese, with number 6, you get egg roll.
Especially us, in Southern California, where our food is a cornucopia of different countries, different styles, and different cultures....all very authentic, where each cuisine, found at nearly every corner of the county (of Los Angeles), is made exactly like the province or region it comes from. ,
We are all spoiled here, for the good food from home.
I was spoiled, too.. for the good food my mother made, in our home.
For example. My mother would make a dish, she simply called "Chinese Food". It was ground beef, green beans, chopped onions, mushrooms, and brown gravy, over a bed of white rice. A bottle of soy sauce was placed on the table, for effect.
But it was the way she cooked it.... that made it "Ah-So" good. After all, a billion people, can't be wrong! I could never duplicate it, even if I dug a hole deep enough. There must have been some ancient Chinese secret ingredient in it, that I didn't know about, Calgon, take me away! I would have several servings, every time mom made it. Indeed, I was always still hungry, an hour later, for more of her "Chinese food".
Thinking about the many wonderful dishes she made, I imagine, she was taught, by my mid-western Grandmother, how to run a household, when she married my father, back in Fort Wayne. She was a young bride, and the family there must have embraced her, and showed her everything they knew.
I am sure, they had few Chinese restaurants in Michigan, and Indiana, in 1959, so they made due.... with green beans replacing bean sprouts, and other tricks, to add variety, spice, and flavor, to kinds of dishes unavailable to them. By the way... that ancient Chinese secret ingredient, I mentioned before... Ginger., the spice of the Orient.
I can just see my young mother, in the kitchen, with my grandmother, showing her how to make Chicken and dumplings. Scalloped potatoes. Chicken Cacciatore. Beef Stroganoff. Greek (lemon) Chicken. Spaghetti (with the sauce, made from scratch, of course). Albondigas, which is a Mexican meatball soup --- no other way to describe it. Chicken Noodles (not soup, but a main course). Tacos, with real Mexican cheese... "Do you want hard or soft tacos?" And "Indian Food", which was a stew made with corn (but we call it "maize"). And Chili-bean Stew, cooled off by a serving of mashed potatoes, on the side. And finally, Barbeque Chicken. One day, I found out the secret to the intoxicating flavor, of her delicious BBQ sauce, when I saw her pouring a can of Pabst Blue Ribbon into the pot.
My mother did the same thing.... making "Chilaquiles". All they were, were crisped tortillias, fried with scrambled eggs. But they were so good. And you never knew how she did it.
This... and a thousand other things, I will miss..... about my mother.
--- Paul Allen Cook "Pablito", March 17, 2019
All Good things must come to an end - Geoffrey Chaucer
- Page 1 of 7 -
"Henrietta and Georgina"
September 23, 2019
by Paul Cook
It was September 11th, 2001. Mom was babysitting a large gentle dog (named Diablo), that Michelle owned, while she traveled to Indonesia, to get objects d'art for her store. Mom kept Diablo on the large loft, next to her laundry room, where she kept 2 chickens, Henrietta, and Georgina. Mom had a big heart, and loved to keep those 2 chickens as pets, rather than see them on the dinner table. They were sweet, and friendly. The minute you went into the laundry room, they would come close to you, and stare at you.
Somehow, the dog got access to the laundry room, and began chasing the chickens, wanting to play. The chickens panicked, and fluttered wildly. They were half dead, when Mom discovered them in the laundry room, after about midnight.
She called me crying.... "Paul, I have an emergency, Can you find an all night vet, and take me there.--- right now?". She had each chicken wrapped in a towel, comforting them ever so carefully. I knew they were goners, they could not even keep their little heads up... they were dangling down, but their eyes were still open, and they were cooing.
I found an all night vet in Irvine, and we jumped in the car, and drove there. It took hours to get there, find a sympathetic veterinarian to help us, and to admit them, while he told my mother that there was little he could do to save them. Still, my mother insisted he treat them, the best he could, and to update us, when we got home. That vet was very nice to my mother. Of course he was. I was there, to make sure.
We got back home to Long Beach by 4:30 am. Mom was still worried. I told her, "Mom, at least they had someone to comfort them, I'm sure that if they die, they'll die happy". I went to my apartment, down the hall, and went to bed. I knew mom could not sleep. I heard activity from her apartment. She probably had her TV on, and was doing housework, until she got sleepy herself.
I was awaken an hour later, by her calling me on the phone..."Paul, the vet called. He said Henrietta and Georgina died peacefully, without any pain". I said "Oh, Mom, I'm so sorry". Then she told me to turn on my TV, and look at what is happening, World War Three has begun. I said, "What?" I turned on my TV in my bedroom. I saw the New York skyline, and the Twin Towers. It was already daybreak in New York City.
Then I saw a jet plane, deliberately hit one of the towers. It was surreal. Was I watching a movie? But from the commentary by the newscasters, I knew. I knew with a sickening certainty, that it was all too real.
I had turned on the TV, in time to catch the second plane, hit the other tower. My mother was right. It was World War III. Or so it seemed. They say war is hell. Well, what I witnessed, was hell on earth, that morning. To see it, was the worst day of my life. First, my mother's heart was broken, by her chickens dying. And then, the most heinous, and tragic event America ever experienced, occurs.
I thank God that I was with my mother, when those things happened, and I am very glad to have been by her side, during that terrible, terrible day.
--- Paul Allen Cook "Pablito", September 23rd, 2019
And as the flames climbed high into the night
To light the sacrificial rite
I saw Satan laughing with delight
The day the music died
-Don McLean, American Pie
-2 of 7-
Somehow, the dog got access to the laundry room, and began chasing the chickens, wanting to play. The chickens panicked, and fluttered wildly. They were half dead, when Mom discovered them in the laundry room, after about midnight.
She called me crying.... "Paul, I have an emergency, Can you find an all night vet, and take me there.--- right now?". She had each chicken wrapped in a towel, comforting them ever so carefully. I knew they were goners, they could not even keep their little heads up... they were dangling down, but their eyes were still open, and they were cooing.
I found an all night vet in Irvine, and we jumped in the car, and drove there. It took hours to get there, find a sympathetic veterinarian to help us, and to admit them, while he told my mother that there was little he could do to save them. Still, my mother insisted he treat them, the best he could, and to update us, when we got home. That vet was very nice to my mother. Of course he was. I was there, to make sure.
We got back home to Long Beach by 4:30 am. Mom was still worried. I told her, "Mom, at least they had someone to comfort them, I'm sure that if they die, they'll die happy". I went to my apartment, down the hall, and went to bed. I knew mom could not sleep. I heard activity from her apartment. She probably had her TV on, and was doing housework, until she got sleepy herself.
I was awaken an hour later, by her calling me on the phone..."Paul, the vet called. He said Henrietta and Georgina died peacefully, without any pain". I said "Oh, Mom, I'm so sorry". Then she told me to turn on my TV, and look at what is happening, World War Three has begun. I said, "What?" I turned on my TV in my bedroom. I saw the New York skyline, and the Twin Towers. It was already daybreak in New York City.
Then I saw a jet plane, deliberately hit one of the towers. It was surreal. Was I watching a movie? But from the commentary by the newscasters, I knew. I knew with a sickening certainty, that it was all too real.
I had turned on the TV, in time to catch the second plane, hit the other tower. My mother was right. It was World War III. Or so it seemed. They say war is hell. Well, what I witnessed, was hell on earth, that morning. To see it, was the worst day of my life. First, my mother's heart was broken, by her chickens dying. And then, the most heinous, and tragic event America ever experienced, occurs.
I thank God that I was with my mother, when those things happened, and I am very glad to have been by her side, during that terrible, terrible day.
--- Paul Allen Cook "Pablito", September 23rd, 2019
And as the flames climbed high into the night
To light the sacrificial rite
I saw Satan laughing with delight
The day the music died
-Don McLean, American Pie
-2 of 7-
"Looks like we made it"
September 29, 2019
by Paul Cook
December 31st. Nineteen ninety-nine (as the artist formerly known as Prince, would say). I found myself alone in my apartment at the turn of the century, for some reason. My mother lives down the hall, and I happen to know that she will be watching Dick Clark, and not going anywhere. We just got back from Costco, and she bought champagne for the evening along with 2000 lbs of cat food. Typical. Use me, to shop at a warehouse, and lug heavy bags upstairs. She of course, gave me a couple of bottles of champagne. After all, she had bought 40 bottles.
My best friend Gus called me later. He said he was coming over. So, we were going out and do the town. I thought, "Great, now I have somebody to go party with, at the Los Angeles Y2K New Year celebration, publicized as the party of the century, and akin to the Ball Drop at Times Square... but here, at the west coast, where I live".
I couldn't wait.
He arrived, but with his wife, and kids. It wasn't going to be the hell raising boys night out I had imagined. I said, "Fine, that's so nice, that you're with your family... because I'm bringing my mother, also". I poured them some champagne, and ran down the hall, and asked my mother if she wanted to go to the party of the century. She did.
So, we all left, in my car, to go to LACELEBRATION2000.ORG. I knew it was on 5th and Grand, and I filled the tank off Willow, before getting on the 710. My muffler on the car was rattling for a week, and it decided to fall down, just as I left the gas station. There was this amazing shower of orange sparks, as I went down the street.... There were a lot of people out, and they were cheering as I went by..... they thought we were celebrating the New year, already. Gus was a mechanic, and we stopped before the on-ramp, and he re-attached the muffler with a coat hanger, and we continued on our way.
At the crowded festival, the kids went one way, and Gus and his wife went the other, I was a little disappointed, as I thought that we were all going to enjoy the New Year's together. At least, I was with my mother, and I was having a good time. So, my mother and I went straight up the thoroughfare, to get closer to the center stage, Various bands were playing. Shania Twain was one of the headliners
The countdown came. The band stopped playing. It suddenly became quiet, except for everybody in unison, counting down from 10. We were all surrounded by skyscrapers. You could hear the countdown being echoed so distinctly. You could only see glass towers, and dark sky, when you looked up.
Midnight. They played a recording of Auld Lang Syne. The stage was dark. Suddenly, there were fireworks. Everywhere. Made even more intense, by their reflection, from all the buildings. Night was turned into day. It was spectacular. And everyone was hugging and kissing each other. I hadn't hugged my mother, and wished her a Happy New Year yet. It didn't occur to me, at the moment, to do so. But before I knew it, she said "Come here, Pablito", and hugged me hard, and wished me a Happy New Year.
I was always shy, and reserved, around people. I didn't show my emotions. I was always "the new kid in town", growing up, and I didn't have many friends, and I became a bookworm. I realized, at that moment, that Mom was different. I had discovered something about her, She was no stick in the mud. She was a happy soul, and knew how to have fun. She would say, many times.... Don't be a kill-joy. She was my mother, but she was also her own person, full of life, and wasn't afraid to show it. I see that many times, in photographs she has, taken before I was born.
I said "Happy New Year" to her. The fireworks stopped, Auld Lang Syne ended, and there was complete silence, and darkness. Then we heard a booming voice, that started singing....LOOKS LIKE WE MADE IT...LOOK HOW FAR WE'VE COME NOW, BABY... a spotlight came on stage, and she continued singing. Applause came from us. Loud applause. Applause that seemed to last forever. But Mom and I continued to embrace.
So, it was mom, who was always there, at every milestone of my life. And I can feel her hugging me, still.
--- Paul Allen Cook "Pablito", September 29th, 2019
-3 of 7-
STEAK versus HOT DOGS
September 16, 2021
by Paul Cook
This particular testimonial, of the love mom had for us, came, unfortunately, shortly after mom's death, when we siblings tried to piece together the more vague memories, of our dear mother's life. One of those memories, was when we drove, from Houston to Los Angeles, and Mom's Mexican mother (who always married very well), offered to put us up, at her penthouse, at the Rosslyn Hotel, in downtown Los Angeles, until our father could set up a home for our family, in the harbor, where he got a new maritime job.
I remember sitting on the leather divan, in that suite, eating hot dogs, and watching a Godzilla movie, with my sisters.... when suddenly, I hear shouting. My mother and grandmother were arguing. I never remembered, what it was, that they were arguing about, but remember having to leave suddenly, and being driven (straight down the Harbor Freeway), to a vacant apartment, late at night, in this new city, that we came to. I never knew what happened, and never saw my Mexican grandmother, again.
Maria told me. just recently, that Mom and Grandma had actually fought, over the treatment my Grandmother gave us children, in her penthouse. Apparently, she and her beau, were dining on steak, in the dining room, while we were eating hot dogs, in the living room. Mom discovered this, and Maria said she heard mom shouting.... "MY CHILDREN EAT, WHAT I EAT.".
I was oblivious, to the discord, at the time. I only remember having to leave downtown LA, and not finishing the Monster Rally on KTLA Channel 5. But Maria knew what happened.
So, like a lioness, protecting her young, mom always made sure us children were treated right. No matter what.
If I could only thank you, and tell you now, how much I love you.
I tried to make this memorial as complete, and true, as I possibly could. Like you have said, many times .... I hope it does you justice.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------THE FINAL GOODBYE, THROUGH TIME AND SPACE
Not saying goodbye, hurts me most of all. I know you know this, and I got your farewell, when you came to my home, and waited across the street, for Armando.
He explained that you knew I came, to your bedside, where you died, months before.
And so, you came, to our home, in kind. You wanted to see our home, and how her sons were getting on. You came to our home, and went to my bedroom one morning, and saw me working on your memorial. Then you met Armando across the street, on the green lawn at the Salvation Army... but when he tried to run to meet you, you gently told him, you could not remain, and you left in the distance. Armando said, you had a beautiful red dress on, and you were young... beautiful ... and glowing. He said that you expressed how happy you were, to see us living our life so well and happily with our beloved cats, and Honeydew (a precious Chihuahua, the newest addition, to our family, now). Then my brother woke up again, that very same morning, into this cruel reality. The reality of having to live, without you.
Just as you gave me a message, for him, at Magnolia,.. you gave me another message again, through him, in my grief.
So nothing, is lost on me, mom. Even the place where you chose, to meet Armando... the "Salvation" Army.
All I can say now is... "Good-Bye, and I love you, so very much".
and I am now positive, that you are getting this message.
Your loving son,
Paul
__________________________________________________________________________
FIVE ODES TO MOM :
These are my five all-time favorite movies Needless to say, who they all were inspired by:
Mother - The ultimate homage to mom. It has America's Sweetheart in it (who I always loved), and made me see that everything.... even the absurdity, and quirkiness, in our relationship... as just more to love mom by.
The Guilt Trip - Made me see mom, as more than just a mom ---an other person, who still loved me, and coddled me, even though I was well into being a grown adult out on my own. More to love mom by. Also, this movie begs the timeless question... "What's in a name?" For me, the answer is everything. For me, the answer is Mom. This movie, like mom would say, is a real tearjerker. It just gets me, every time, when Barbara Streisand says to her son, DON'T YOU SEE, ANDY, IT WAS ALWAYS YOU. YOU'RE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE, BABY. IT WILL ALWAYS BE YOU.
Twilight of the Golds - Made me see mom, in all her infinite qualities. Showed how a mother loves a son, no matter who he is, or what he does. Shows also, how much a mother can forgive, of her son, and that I am always her son, no matter what happens.
The Descendants - Taught me, that we are all the same. That we are all human, and share good, and bad, inside us, and make mistakes, and no one is perfect. Showed me, the power of forgiveness, and the need for everyone, to have the ability to let go.
Ordinary People - So unfair, to motherhood. MTM's character actually says, "Are you crazy, a mother doesn't hate her son", as she breaks down from trying to keep up appearances after a tragedy befalls the family. This movie contains the line at the end... "Don't look up to anyone too much ---they might disappoint you". Well, Mom, you came back to Bethany, to get us. You have never disappointed me. All you brought to me, was joy. And, I love you, so very much.
For years, I had used that last movie, as an instrument, to justify my 15 year breach in my own relationship I had with mom... a separation I paid the price for, when she died.
Mom forgave. I didn't.
And I didn't learn how to forgive... until it was too late.
__________________________________________________________________________
THE AGE OF AQUARIUS
It truly was the Age of Aquarius, when mom had me, and raised me. A liberating moment, in time, when peace guided our planet. And love steered the stars. Consciousness expanded. Universal enlightenment. The song, Age of Aquarius, by the 5th Dimension, said it all. The first vinyl record, that mom gave me, was Up, Up and Away, by the 5th Dimension. I played it all the time, on my little toy phonograph. Ode to Billy Joe, was the second 45 mom gave me. I think I was 6 years old, at the time. Later, when man walked on the moon, mom said that I was re-enacting the moon landing, watching the footage on TV, while playing with my toy Lunar module, and Saturn 5 rocket, on the living room carpet. Then later, in the 70s, I would tell people, that I wanted to be the first man on Mars. I believed that everything was possible. Man was reaching for the stars, and I was the star child. (from Kubrick's 2001).
The '60s can be best described, as an age of promise. Everyone felt it. Man finally could aspire, and achieve anything and everything. For me, being a child in the '60s, and of the '60s, I was always happy and secure in the fact, that mom would always be there, to take care of me, and love me.And so, she was. And so, she did.
_________________________________________________________________________
MOM WAS THE WORLD TO ME
Mom had a cat named Quasimoto... it was a big old ugly orange cat, with crooked teeth. It was the king of the pets at mom's place, and everyone knew and loved that animal.
Mom had this cat bridge, or cat tunnel she devised, going across, from the laundry room loft, to her bedroom on the second floor. If someone wanted to burglarize her, it wouldn't be hard.
One morning, as I went to her bedroom and waited to drive her to Pleasantville, in South Pasadena, she said that she was delayed, by picking up the dead cat, at the laundry room. A cat died there last night. Lucita. Lucita had come through the tunnel, some hours ago, before the dawn, to say goodbye to mom. It knew it was dying and knew that it would receive all the comfort in the world, from mom, when she came to visit her. Then, it went back to the laundry room, to die, as all cats do ... alone, in dignity. Cats are noble creatures. Mom would call them "regal", the way they would pose, like a sphinx, sometimes even crossing their paws. I loved cats very much, just as mom did.
That was mom's world.
"Our Gang"
October 1, 2019
by Paul Cook
With Mom, we (us kids) went to:
Science-Fiction (Star-Trek) conventions, in Los Angeles, San Diego, and boldly, where men have gone before. We met William Shatner, Leonard Nimoy, Gil Gerard, Harlan Ellison, and many other actors, writers, celebrities and extraterrestrials.
Live long, and prosper.
We would go to Metromedia Square, and watch live sit-coms being filmed. I saw What's Happening, Good Times, Maude, The Gong Show, Three is Company, and many others. Andy Kaufman walked through one of the sets, and Mom shouted..... DO ELVIS, DO ELVIS. He just looked at us, and then said slowly in his squeaky little Latka voice..."I am nothing but a hound dog". Clearly, he wouldn't do his SNL version of Elvis, but we all cheered wildly, anyway.
The Rocky Horror Picture Show at the Tiffany Theater on the Sunset strip, for 2 years solid. Little Michelle always stole the show as the best Frank N. Furter (a sweet transvestite, from Transsexual, Transylvania). Mom, Maria, their friends, and I, were Transylvanians doing the Time Warp (again). After 2 years of viewing on the big screen, we all finally met the cast, in a revival encore at the Roxy,
Going to the Carson Twin Cinema, and countless other theaters, with aromatic, dripping and mouth watering foods we purchased from outside, while people sitting around us would stare in disbelief.
We were never kicked out of a theater, however, those Tommy chili cheese burgers were the last straw. We ended up having to share our food with everybody, and we started not having enough.
We were like a gang, everywhere we went.
Mom would always pick up the latest DC, Marvel, and Gold Key comics, at the local market, when we were younger. I would satisfy my boyhood insomnia many a night, by reading:
Little Lulu
Uncle Scrooge,
Then later...:
Action
The Legion of Super Heroes
Bizarro World
Kamandi, The Last Boy on Earth
Magnum Robot Fighter (re-issue).
and others, too many to mention, including of course, Mad Magazine.
I had a magnificent collection of 70's comics....but they were not in the best condition, as I read them over, and over again.
I even remember, going off to college. Mom was still going out with us. She picked me up at UCLA during my freshman year, to go to see this new group called, THE GO-GO's, playing at the Whiskey Au-Go Go. They were this kind of disorganized punk rock girl band -- they were never going to make it big.
And the B-52's at the Greek Theater. It was a night concert. During "Dance this mess around", the audience were doing (trying to do) all these 60's dances, and mom knew every single one. The crowd started watching her, instead of the stage.
Yes, I remember. She was so happy that she had people to go out with, that shared her same interests, and that she always had a good time with. Those people were her own sons and daughters.
If life became too static or boring, she knew just what to do, in order to have fun. And we all had so much fun, being with her.
--- Paul Allen Cook "Pablito", March 17, 2020
Goodnight Sweetheart,
All my prayers are for you
Goodnight Sweetheart,
I'll be watching o'er you
Tears and parting may make us forlorn
But with the dawn a new day is born
So I'll say
Goodnight Sweetheart,
Sleep will banish sorrow
Goodnight Sweetheart,
When we meet tomorrow
Dreams enfold you,
In them, dear, I'll hold you
Goodnight Sweetheart Goodnight.
So I'll say
Goodnight Sweetheart,
Sleep will banish sorrow
Goodnight Sweetheart,
When we meet tomorrow
Dreams enfold you,
in them, dear,
I'll hold you
Goodnight Sweetheart,
--------------Good Bye-----------------
(A. Bowlly)
-4 of 7-
Science-Fiction (Star-Trek) conventions, in Los Angeles, San Diego, and boldly, where men have gone before. We met William Shatner, Leonard Nimoy, Gil Gerard, Harlan Ellison, and many other actors, writers, celebrities and extraterrestrials.
Live long, and prosper.
We would go to Metromedia Square, and watch live sit-coms being filmed. I saw What's Happening, Good Times, Maude, The Gong Show, Three is Company, and many others. Andy Kaufman walked through one of the sets, and Mom shouted..... DO ELVIS, DO ELVIS. He just looked at us, and then said slowly in his squeaky little Latka voice..."I am nothing but a hound dog". Clearly, he wouldn't do his SNL version of Elvis, but we all cheered wildly, anyway.
The Rocky Horror Picture Show at the Tiffany Theater on the Sunset strip, for 2 years solid. Little Michelle always stole the show as the best Frank N. Furter (a sweet transvestite, from Transsexual, Transylvania). Mom, Maria, their friends, and I, were Transylvanians doing the Time Warp (again). After 2 years of viewing on the big screen, we all finally met the cast, in a revival encore at the Roxy,
Going to the Carson Twin Cinema, and countless other theaters, with aromatic, dripping and mouth watering foods we purchased from outside, while people sitting around us would stare in disbelief.
We were never kicked out of a theater, however, those Tommy chili cheese burgers were the last straw. We ended up having to share our food with everybody, and we started not having enough.
We were like a gang, everywhere we went.
Mom would always pick up the latest DC, Marvel, and Gold Key comics, at the local market, when we were younger. I would satisfy my boyhood insomnia many a night, by reading:
Little Lulu
Uncle Scrooge,
Then later...:
Action
The Legion of Super Heroes
Bizarro World
Kamandi, The Last Boy on Earth
Magnum Robot Fighter (re-issue).
and others, too many to mention, including of course, Mad Magazine.
I had a magnificent collection of 70's comics....but they were not in the best condition, as I read them over, and over again.
I even remember, going off to college. Mom was still going out with us. She picked me up at UCLA during my freshman year, to go to see this new group called, THE GO-GO's, playing at the Whiskey Au-Go Go. They were this kind of disorganized punk rock girl band -- they were never going to make it big.
And the B-52's at the Greek Theater. It was a night concert. During "Dance this mess around", the audience were doing (trying to do) all these 60's dances, and mom knew every single one. The crowd started watching her, instead of the stage.
Yes, I remember. She was so happy that she had people to go out with, that shared her same interests, and that she always had a good time with. Those people were her own sons and daughters.
If life became too static or boring, she knew just what to do, in order to have fun. And we all had so much fun, being with her.
--- Paul Allen Cook "Pablito", March 17, 2020
Goodnight Sweetheart,
All my prayers are for you
Goodnight Sweetheart,
I'll be watching o'er you
Tears and parting may make us forlorn
But with the dawn a new day is born
So I'll say
Goodnight Sweetheart,
Sleep will banish sorrow
Goodnight Sweetheart,
When we meet tomorrow
Dreams enfold you,
In them, dear, I'll hold you
Goodnight Sweetheart Goodnight.
So I'll say
Goodnight Sweetheart,
Sleep will banish sorrow
Goodnight Sweetheart,
When we meet tomorrow
Dreams enfold you,
in them, dear,
I'll hold you
Goodnight Sweetheart,
--------------Good Bye-----------------
(A. Bowlly)
-4 of 7-
A Legacy of Freedom and Happiness
July 27, 2020
by Paul Cook
I remember mom saying, how much she liked this hit as it played on the FM stations. at home, and in the car. Indeed, we all liked this tune. The song, of brotherly love, with liberty (freedom) and justice (equality) for all.
I just learned recently, that it was written for Billiie Jean King, the famous tennis player, who was interestingly enough, from Long Beach, California, and graduated Poly High School (by my home) in 1961 (the year of my birth). Billie Jean King proved that women were just as good as men, in the sport of tennis (becoming the greatest tennis player, in the world, to date), and had the courage to come out, in the middle of her career, and speak out about a same-sex relationship she had... to her family, the sports community, and to the world. All these revelations were not made by choice. However, she met them all, with a bravery and dignity seldom seen at that time.
So, this song, was about freedom. Freedom to be who you are, declare who you are, and live the life you want --- as is the right of every American --- in the pursuit of happiness.
And mom knew what this song was about, too. Her life was a struggle, to be safe, and happy, despite the troubles and problems that plagued her first and second marriages. Yet through it all, she always fiercely protected her children, and kept them happy, and positive toward the future.
She herself finally found a happy medium, with her last husband, never telling me the faults or failures, of my natural father, who I barely remember.
With quiet humility , she saved us all the unpleasant details, and never said a harsh word, about my father.
That was mom. Interested only in our well-being, being optimistic, making our lives better, and ultimately, happy.
Our Happiness. That is all, she ever wanted, for us.--- Paul Allen Cook "Pablito", March 17, 2020
-5 of 7-
My Kind of Town, Chicago is ...
December 20, 2021
by Paul Cook
Alas, I could never encompass my mother's entire life and goodness, in one internet memorial, no matter how much I try.
It's been over three years now, since she passed. And I still go to this website every day, and mourn her loss.
I will never be over it. I can only revel in this final, and most distant memory, I have, of being with her, and attempt to describe it here.
It was right after she graduated, and had me (at Camp Lejeune). I remember being in a Volkswagen and being situated carefully, between the 2 seats, and the stick shift knob, so I would not move the shifter. On both sides of me, were 2 young women. One, my mother. The other side, a girlfriend from high school, obviously. Mom was visiting a college classmate, from her Art School, and we were riding around, in her car, down the streets and bridges of downtown Chicago. I remember seeing the tall buildings of the city, while being careful not to kick that shifter. There was excitement in the air. They were having a little reunion. They were enjoying the city, and mom was leaving her alma mater, and her college friend, for the last time, to begin life as a new mother, and newlywed, with the marine she married.
My mother must have been showing off her firstborn son, to her best friend, as they embarked on the beginning of their lives from college. I could tell, that mom was proud of me, as they happily drove with wonder, and delight, and great expectation, into the future.
Their generation was promise. They had the future, firmly in their grasp. They were the generation that came of age, after the good fight (World War II). They were going to make this, a better world, the world was filled anew, with peace and joy, and the world was theirs. All this, I can see, in my mother's gaze, from her senior year high school snapshot..This memory, sums up the whole story, about my life, with my mother.
I am so happy, that she was my mother. I am so happy, that I was her son.
I was so fortunate.
Pablito, born Tuesday,11/14/1961, 11:30 AM and continuing to live on for his mother, unto the "present" day--- so called, because these days of our lives, are truly, a gift.
To Horacio,
January 8, 2020
by Paul Cook
Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for staying with my mother, and caring for her, and providing for her. in the latter part of her life. Nothing I can say, or do, or give you, can begin to express my gratitude. Only this humble memorial, that you might remember her by.
With deepest sympathy, Paul
-6 of 7-. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ~~ God is Love ~~ . . . . . . . . . .
October 17, 2019
by Paul Cook
One fine Sunday,
In my childhood,
I was so very happy, to have met
two kind aunts, who lived together
In a home in Fort Wayne, and who must have known us before, as
Carmen's toddlers.
Upon seeing us again, they instantly
wrapped us in such love, and served us
the very best meal of my entire life,
Spaghetti and meatballs, and garlic bread with the crust cut off
( the fastest way, to my heart )
when we visited again, ten years later, during our
stay at Bethany, with our Grandparents.
Grandpa Bade, was giving us a tour,
of the Fort Wayne, of my mother's youth.
I didn't know it, until I saw our aunts again,
Two lovely wonderful ladies, so warm and dear,
so happy to see us,
and who loved us so much, simply for being
Paul and Maria, (and later, Michelita and Armandito)
Carmen's children
Children, whom they surely must have loved, as much as
Carmen herself
_____
May her soul find the salvation of
Thy Great Eternal Love