My story is more of a connection rather than a story. It is about the sky, Dad & his Mother and Dad & I. From the beginning of Dad's illness he never showed any real worry. He always said, "everyone's gonna die eventually. I'm amazed I made it this far. I've lived a great life." To listen to Dad, he wasn't worried at all. He moved from one doctors appointment to the next with ease. We planned scans and tests. It was what we did. He incorporated it into his busy schedule of managing the buildings and making his daily stops to visit his friends at the docks, David's shop and the airport to let the dog run. With the first round of radiation, he didn't skip a beat. I went with him everyday at 8:30am Monday through Friday for 40 days. It took all of 5 minutes. The first day was a little longer because they had to get the machine calibrated. But after that, it was a piece of cake. So it was, a new stop on his daily route. We would talk about everything from the business to plants. It was a special time those 40 days. I started to understand my Dad's outlook on things. As I went with him on his daily treck around Fort Lauderdale to the places he loved. He would always tell me to look at the sky and see how beautiful it is. We would drive over the 17th street bridge and he would always say, "you see that, it's paradise, Ha! I live here, how lucky am I!" I would look up and yes it was pretty but, I had other things to think about. We would be tooling around day after day and no less than every hour he would tell me to look at the sky and see it's beauty. He never said why it was so beautiful to him, just that it was!
As this last week has passed by me in a fog, I now know why.....
I remember on one of my last visits before he went in the hospital, we were out in the boat looking to see if any fisherman had caught any "greenies" (dolphin). Dad went out almost everyday to see if he could score any fresh fish for dinner. We were heading toward Bahia Mar in the intercoastal it was around 5:30pm. Dad knew the time to be on the water to catch all the guys coming in from a day of fishing. It was a beautiful evening, warm with a colorful sky. The sun was starting to make it's way down to rest till the next day. Dad slowed the boat down and pointed to the sky. He then took out his pad of paper and wrote, "Special sky!" I said "yes" and continued to talk about whatever it was I was blabbering about. He then stopped the boat and wrote to me "Remember this sky. You don't see this just anywhere, just right here." I agreed with him that it was spectacular. It was, the colors were so vivid and sweeping. The purples, pinks, yellows and blues. I told him how lovely it was. He asked me if I knew why I should remember it. I told him I didn't. He then wrote to me, "That is my mother making it so beautiful." He seemed sad and deep in thought. I smiled and was touched by him sharing his thoughts with me about his mother. I never forgot that sky. At that moment, I realised he was thinking about his own mortality and being with his mother again.
He felt a very strong connection with the sky that night. It was the first time I ever saw him tear up and feel sad about his illness. But, he was at peace because he would go to the beautiful sky with his mother. It was a short special moment and I remember it vividly.
The night Dad died at 5:34pm, the same time Dad pointed out the sky to me that Nonna made, my brother John and I went to the front balcony and looked out over Fort Lauderdale. The sky was spectacular just as it was that evening on the boat. Three jet streams were criss crossed in the sky, so clear and bright! The sky was like a watercolor with purples, yellows, pinks and blues as a back drop to the city buildings. It was a reminder for us (my two brothers and I) to always watch the sky's beauty and feel it's love.
Since Dad's death, I have seen 3 jet streams criss crossing the sky on two different occasions!
I will forever see the warmth and beauty of the sky's Love!
That's my Father making it so beautiful!