When will I ever move on?  Im not crying everyday like I use to. It's been two year's now since you been gone.   There are so many things I want to say to you even though I talk to you everyday, I wish I could just see you one more time, to hold you to kiss you  to tell you that I love you.  Since you been gone so many things have happened with our kids things that they would have come to you with.  Questions they have I don't have answer's  to I tell them to remember all the things you shared and taught them, and I can only share with them the things I remember from you.  It's like all went wrong when you passed away.  I have all your medical records and there are so many things that are not right that was done to you and there is nothing I can do about it. I need you to show me what to do please let me know that you are still with me.  I know that when I see or have a ladybug land on me that it is you.  I never seen them before as much as I do now and I thank you for that. I love you and miss you so much I still have a hard time sleeping cause I could only sleep well when you were here I felt safe and secure.  Not NO More. You will always be "FOREVER MINE"    Love your wife Sue xoxoxoxo

It's been 22 mos. since you passed away.  You were my security, my strength and my comfort.  I have been trying to go on without you but I just can't seem to find my way. I need you so much I just don't know what to do.  Can you hear me when I talk to you ? can you see me when I dance for you?  You were everything to me I never had really any friends and my family was so far away all we had was each other.  You always took care and protected me, you took care of all the little and big things that needed taking care of.  You always told me "were a team Sue, and all we need is each other" So what now??  I cant seem to even think right I don't have anyone to talk to or to feel my hurt, and I hurt so bad!!  I hold on to all the things you taught me and I remember all the things you said, I have to keep going on but how do I do it without you?  I don't want you to forget me and I need you to show me that you are with me, you always made me feel that I could do anything, but how do I do this when your not here??  There will never be any other to replace you I will Love you Forever!  Your Wife Sue

CL was raised in Saticoy California, and he was well liked by everyone.  He had many friends that he grew up with and remained friends with him throughout the years.  I remember meeting CL when I was 13 years old and he and I became good friends also.  He loved  hanging out at Saticoy Park. Every weekend he and his friends would meet there and drink beer listen to oldies and just have a good time.  CL was always the life of the party, he loved life and he was a people person, he could make friends anywhere and with anyone he had a smile that would knock you out infact that was all him his Smile.  He and I got together in 1994, we were best friends before this and had lost touch for a little while and we got together he was there for me, and he took on the responsiblity of raising my four kids he and I moved to Santa Maria Ca. in 1995, and he started working for International Allied Van Lines.  He was a class A truck driver and was top man at his company.  He loved his job and we traveled everywhere. It took so much pride in his work being a truck driver was always a dream to him one of his goals and he was able to accomplish this goal and I thank God I was able to be blessed to see this happen.  He was a great Husband, Father and Grandpa he had so much love for all his 8-grandchildren, his heart belonged to me his wife he loved me unconditionaly and I loved him.  There could never be another that could take his Place I was blessed to have him in my life and his passing has been the hardest thing in the world for me.  He had me spoiled cause he loved putting a smile on my face and he could do that anytime and any place.  He will always be remembered and loved by all   so rest in peace my CL  I will be with you again.     Love your wife Sue