Hi Dear daughter,
Just returned from celebrating your 54th birthday with your son in Ft Lauderdale. Many things went well but all were diminished because you weren't there!!! As my mind flooded with so many good memories I asked God to take care of you and to put happiness in your existence. Watching Sugar, all that you embodied with you generosity and love of the unfortunate came cascading into my emotions. So sad that you weren't there as it broke my heart again. I've been hoping that you would come back to make our family complete. Waiting to meet you in heaven seems so far away. The hole in my heart will never close. The tears come when i'm not trying to keep them at bay.
Love Dad

Dear Colleen,
Our birthdays were dude by dude.. true Sagittarians! I miss your energy and your laughter.. your kindness and generosity!! Always the giver and thinking of others.. love to you see n heaven and your family here at home

Happy 54th Birthday to my awesome sister.  Please remember her!

So sad to not have you in our lives, Col. We just celebrated in Buffalo over Thanksgiving with that same exuberant warmth you always brought to the party.  There were many laughs and great stories, but also a slight twinge of sadness without you, Sis.

Trying to keep your indomitable energy, wit, grace, intelligence, and generosity alive - both inside and out. You remain in our spirit and are part of it.

We so miss your love each day but especially on this one.

Aunt Colleen, I think about you a lot and how many similarities we had. I feel your spirit with me a lot.♥️ I believe you say hi to me through the lights as they randomly start tinking two syllables. I especially feel your spirit in CHQ. I miss you soo much! You will always be in my heart.♥️
Love,
Kate ♥️

Hi Col, Painful but good as I looked at all your pictures of you here Sun at the lake
Such joy and fun. Wish you were not just in our prayers where every night we ask for your help getting us to heaven. You were a beautiful young girl who became a beautiful woman. I miss you dearly.
Love, Dad

Col, I say good morning to you and Suzie every morning when I wake up and then again when I get in my car as I have your pictures there. I saw a rainbow a few weeks ago and it reminded me of you. I can still hear your big laugh and see that infectious smile. Always in my heart.

Aunt Melissa

Your indomitable spirit was with us last month when we gathered in CHQ, Col. It was full of competitive games, long dinners, and big laughs - we don't do it any other way, as you know - and that spirit was also in each of us, cherishing the time together. This weekend was tough and full of memories but how you spread your unique and bright love still gives sustenance. Miss you dearly, my Sis.

Colleen- I think and pray for you often. I remember the holidays the summers we spent - you were so special to all of us - We are all better for having you in our lives.  love and prayers, Grandma Mo (Aunt Maureen)

To Colleen and her family,
I think of you quite often and a smile comes to my face… I saw a jeep that reminded me of you a day ago… when the sun filters through the trees just like it did the day you left us…
Colleen, you’re a special star in heaven.. love to your family ❤️

Our Precious daughter, Colleen, I think of you, talk with you every day. We were blessed to have you with us for 51 years, are still part of who I am and how I live. Your sparkle, your drive, your intelligence. Your kindness, your love , your vulnerability. You are my Colleen, forever. I love you, Mom

Happy birthday to my beautiful, loving, giving, one-of-kind sister. Col would be 53 today and not a day goes by without my thinking of her full life and how much we all miss what she gave to us. Love you Sis. Miss you badly.
Tim

Happy Birthday in heaven my sweet and energetic niece Colleen. I love you!!!

I Think of Colleen on a regular basis. She was so special and gave so much energy and love to everybody.
I feel the warmth from her family and the love that she shared and received from all of you.
Sending you all my love and thinking of Colleen with great love and admiration on the anniversary of her passing.
Love
Kathy Guerke

I went to be with you early this morning in the Nativity cemetery to try and assuage my sadness about this day.I tried to recall our many good times together as a family. I hope you saw the Lewes family reunion with Uncle Mac by your side in heaven as well as ours here at the point. I think everyone thought of you with great affection oftentimes during that week. I’ve finally realized that the sadness doesn’t disappear because you were so special in so many ways. I was always proud to be your Dad and want you to know that Mom and I pray to be with you in heaven every night BUT NOT
THIS YEAR While I have tried hard to follow your example to make people happy my mind is usually the title of this website which is so appropriate FOREVER MISSED.
Love, Dad

Col would appreciate that I am going to a concert tonight!  We celebrated a number of birthdays and graduations in Chautauqua in late July with everyone, and she was dearly missed being in the middle of it all.  Was great to have Jack and Jess there with us and welcome Jess to the family. Lots of great memories there with my cool sisters and brother, and so many of you. Thanks Mom and Dad and Grandpa Jim for finding that special place.
Be good to each other and cherish those special moments and times

I have no original words. Here is something that I have read to myself many times:
This is a moment of suffering.
Suffering is part of life.
May I be kind to myself in this moment.
May I give myself the compassion I need.

I am having a really hard time right now.
It's painful for me to feel this now.

Everyone feels this way sometimes.
This is part of being human.

May I hold my pain with tenderness.
May I be gentle and understanding with myself.

I am worthy of receiving self-compassion.
I will try to be as compassionate as possible.

Happy heavenly birthday Col. Love and miss you.

Melissa

[With tears streaming as I listen to NEBRASKA our first shared song!]
My dear Colleen,
I heard your voice in the wind today
and I turned to see your face
The warmth of the wind caressed me
As I stood silently in place

I felt your touch in the sun today
as its warmth filled the sky
I closed my eyes for your embrace
and my spirit soared high

I saw your eyes in the window pane
as I watched the falling rain
It seemed as each raindrop fell
It quietly said your name

I held you close in my heart today
It made me feel complete
You may have died... but you are not gone
You will always be a part of me

As long as the sun shines
the wind blows...
the rain falls...
You will live inside of me forever
for that is all my heart knows
Love Dad

-Friday, 8/21/20, a moment

Look at what the light did now…

It’s the anniversary of losing my beautiful sister. A warm and still southern sunset awaits as sitting on the back porch this evening, gathering strength through a soulful “Yacht Rock” playlist (yeah, am not kidding), and awash in feeling Colleen takes me to a mix of emotional places. Dwelling about it, telling myself trying to make sense is probably pointless. Can’t shake that, so… what else? Everything else? No, but many things ‘else about her rushing around. Moments. We want so many more that we’ll never have. 

The Bee Gees’ How Deep is Your Love? plays over the top of the staccato din of cicadas, cardinals, wrens, and mockingbirds. To get indulgent about answering that song’s question to her: ‘Hey Col, I hope you know it’s so deep that I can’t stand it. If we could give it (our love) all to you in any and every moment of stress and conflict you coped with so bravely, would it have healed you?’ 

With or without us, she was strong and singular, handling as deftly as can be imagined her own challenges, all the while keeping unconditional that eternally maternal instinct to love people.

I think Col would find this moment hearing beautiful harmonies (ex. Kenny Loggins Heart to Heart), memorable bass lines (ex. Commodores' Easy Like Sunday Morning), ethereal pitch and inflection (Stephen Stills’ Singing Call), and lyrical saxophone intros to a simple and important message (ex. England Dan and John Ford Coley’s Love is the Answer), all the while watching the kittens climb straight up the porch screen bemusedly chasing birds they won’t reach (and puzzled on how to get down)….

I know she would find this an at-home porch concert and spectacle worthy of the reminder to stay grounded and cherish life’s simplicity.  She was all about a day’s end absorbing music, pet activity, and mellowing into an evening.  An example like this of life’s simplicity and accepting what it gives you, embracing it for just what it is wasn’t always there for her mind but I know firsthand that she cherished moments like this.  She needed moments like this to get ready for the battle tormenting her mind.

We dearly missed her at Chautauqua a few weeks back - as it was the last time and place we were all together a little over a year ago.  But we felt her presence then, as I do now.

Teary-eyed, I’m in a connected place with her. This happens enough, as I know it does for my parents and siblings, but this one is a bit more pronounced. I want to capitalize and get it to recur, to bring on her essence, her vibe, with all its laughter, sarcasm, and complexity, whenever I can. Capture it, bottle it, and open it when needed and bring out the love which wrapped her own essence like her powerful hugs.

I don’t have a different message, just expressing from a big heart that misses her. Hope that’s ok and that you put a little of your ‘Colleen’ on and share her spirit of unconditional love with another person, plus an animal :) 

And don’t be afraid to get yourself some Bee Gees from time to time or be bashful about showing others how deep your love is.

Tim

My prayers for dear sister who left us a year ago. PEACE BE ON YOU

It’s a year of memories, so many happy ones as I look at the photo gallery again and again. But in truth I am very sad. Colleen is a part of who I am. may sound selfish. When an illness strikes, attack it, do all you can to cure it. Was there more that could have helped Col to be with us longer, to see and feel the beauty that is life on earth? 
With faith that she is experiencing peace and love in another place in God’s care I(we) can continue to have hope that we will be there together one day .
From your birth on Thanksgiving day til you left us with so many memories, thank you Col for being our daughter.Mom

Dear Dan, Emma, Jackson and Family,
It was one year ago and I was here in Asheville that I heard the tragic news of Colleens passing.
She was a shining light in all our lives. Her energy excitement love and enthusiasm radiated to all around her. There were moments when Colleen and I would visit that we could not get a word in edgewise for both of us had the gift of gab and so much to catch up on in a short amount of time. So we would just end up talking over each other and giggle the whole time. Maybe it was the fact that we were both true Saggitarians and our birthdays were just days apart that our energy level was so similar...if you believe in that stuff!! 
Either way I miss Colleens quick talking gatherings, quick thinking thoughts and her quick loving mind... 

Thanks Tim. You said it so well that my tears are running down my face. Her house would look like Noah's ark and she might not care what the authorities said as long as her loved ones were protected!

8 months ago today we lost my dear sister and she's been a heavy reminder of late that it's about the fact that we're all in this together. Though she never wanted to bring others down with what she was dealing with, keeping much to herself, she still did awesomely. In a conversation in my head with her today, I smile and laugh at how she would have said something like "hey Tim, I'm no role model on how best to socially distance because I wanna take care of of people and/or pets if I can and am needed"...... Oh, you'd be needed Col, and would have a house full of animals and maybe people, and as busy a calendar as ever. You might even be reprimanded for not adhering as strictly as required to the rules of keeping a safe social distance and related protocols, but you'd make others feel your care and concern deeply and memorably.....which you'd gladly accept as a worthy tradeoff without a second thought.

T that was beautifully written. I will always see and feel Colleen through the sun. She was a bright and shining person who made a lasting and loving impression on so many that she touched. 

Today is the 6th month anniversary of "our precious little girl's ' leaving us!
As the clouds gather here in South Florida people ask how are you doing? While the hole in my heart will never heal I feel some days of sun. Recently I had a birthday celebration with phone messages from my sons and dinner with my daughter Erin and Colleen's son Jack and it made me feel good for a while. But the clouds came when I remembered that she used to be here celebrating with me! The sun shines when I am happy that her suffering ended 6 months ago! The sun shines with so many good memories of being here with her since my retirement! I force the sun to come out when I do something to make a person happy as she asked in her message at her funeral. I force the sun to come out when I thank God for giving me my precious Coleen for 50 years!! I write asking God that you who loved her have days of sun in her memory and fewer days of clouds!
T.McMahon

Missing my sister all the time and especially today, given that it's been 5 months since her passing, as well as Emma's birthday. We love you Emm, Happy Birthday! Keep that indomitable spirit going that your mom passed on to you with her special aplomb and grace (your middle name).

Dan began his solo sailing expedition on his sloop, Hazel James, the other day and there was a poignant quote he referenced in the blog that I can't get out of my head (thankfully). It's attributed to Dr. Seuss, (who can also go by Dr. Zeus in my book). It says “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” Colleen made things happen, mostly for other people's benefit. As hard as it is, I am trying to smile because of that, but always end up crying. 

If you want follow Dan on his adventure, the blog is https://hjsailing.blog

This is Raj from India.

I have known Colleen, my sister, during her India stay days. This was complete shock for me as I knew her well, experienced her kindness for friends. Unfortunately I came to know of this very late.

I pray for Colleen. Hope Dan and children will have strength to bear this loss.

Best for Dan, Emma and Jack.

Thinking of the Coates and McMahons today.... sending love on this special day.
Kristen

Missing my great sister extra on this special day. She was, and still is a beacon of light and love. She cherished this day because it focused on family and friends, not because it was her birthday.

Remember the love she spread to us all and share it with others.

Thank you for your heartfelt and touching wishes. They mean so much.

Peace

Happy Heavenly Birthday to my niece Colleen who was beautiful inside and out. I am a better person for having had her in my life. Thanks Col.

Happy Birthday Col. Focusing on blessings today, and you’re at the top of the list ❤️

Thank you to the "Buffalo" McMahon's for all your hospitality during the celebration of life for Colleen. She was a dear, sweet cousin and during many Thanksgivings, Christmases, and Fourth of Julys, she was like my younger sister. I remember that she was a phenomenal athlete and could routinely beat me at tennis and golf. She was often picked ahead of me during our softball games at Lake Chautauqua. She played second base while I was relegated to right field, playing under the big tree where many balls got lost in the branches. Colleen had a warm smile, a great laugh, tons of energy and a compassionate heart. Although it was sad to hear many of the shares during the ceremony, it was a reminder of how many lives she touched. She will be forever missed.

Love - Sean McMahon

I am sorry to be posting so late. I just heard that Colleen passed from several mutual PointChau friends this weekend. I guess I am still stunned and in shock. As I write this, I just finished reading all of the beautiful stories posted and looking all 244 photos on my large monitor at work, with tear-filled eyes making them harder to see. But my blurred vision couldn't hide Colleen's exuberance and effervescence from shining through those images and remembrances. My deepest most genuine condolences to the whole family. My wonderful memories of Colleen at the ballfield, and at the Point will live on forever. I'll let the rest of the Aron clan know the sad news and send them the link to this website which so wonderfully captures and portrays how how truly special Collen was to all of us who knew her. God's blessings to all of you.

Please see the “Life” section of this site for Emma, Jack's eulogies of their mom, T's eulogy of his daughter, and Dianne's story of Colleen's early life.

Dan, Jackson, Emma, Uncle T, Aunt Diane, Kevin, Timmy, and Erin praying for comfort and healing. With love, Maureen (Col's cousin form Maryland)

I feel grateful that I crossed paths with Colleen in her last two years of life. Although I know those years were often not easy, her struggle was beautiful. She was truly making progress against internal odds that I can only fathom, for that and more she has my lifelong respect. Although many never reach the top of Mount Everest, no one can take away the views seen along the way. I am grateful that Colleen had moments of healing and connection in these last years. I hope they were transcendent.

Colleen ate from the buffet of life and truly embodied the word gifted. From academics, athletics, tennis, running, reading, knitting, cooking, baking, drawing, journaling, poetry, entertaining, traveling, shopping, enjoying movies and TV, music, dancing, caring for animals, socializing, you name it! While her time on earth was cut too short, she truly packed it in in the years that she had. Her life was like the dense fantasy novels she read and loved, full of adventure, daring, twists, turns, ups and downs, mysteries, many interesting characters, and divine lessons learned.

The way she lived and especially the way she brought other people in to her life will stick with me and continue to inspire me for the rest of mine. Although Colleen was masterful at all that she did, it is really so true: "People will forget what you said, will forget what you did, but they will always remember how you made them feel." Although she is gone physically, her memory is here spiritually and emotionally, continuing to inspire, especially through her amazing children, family members, and friends. Her vulnerability bred intimacy.

Colleen knew that I loved quotes, poetry, little bits of wisdom. She asked me to share with her what I came across, in hindsight, probably because she thought it would make me feel special and included. That was her way. A few months ago I shared a poem with her that I will paraphrase: "Life loves broken things. Life takes broken clouds to make rain, broken soil to make grain, broken grain to make bread, broken bread to give strength, broken people to heal the world." In our fix-it culture the word "broken" gets a bad rap, but I think broken is under-rated, it is one end of the spectrum and one side of the coin. Our muscles break and mend many times throughout our life to make us strong, as do our hearts. Colleen was nothing if not strong.

So many have already said what I knew and loved about Colleen although its been awhile since we'd spoken; its wonderful to hear more recent news & stories. We had a lot of fun on the Point, enjoying music, watching our toddlers together in the sand & water. I'm just heartsick for Dan, Jackson, Emma, all of the McMahons and Coates. Godspeed Col. You are missed already and your light still shines.

Dear Dan, Emma and Jack,
I have been so distraught since I received the call from Dan on August 21.
Colleen was so loved by all of us. She loved us back unconditionally. Emma you were your Moms superstar! Jackson you were the apple in your Moms eyes..and Dan, the rock who kept all of you together.
We all believed in Colleen, I only wish she believed as much as we did in herself.

She was so talented whether it was athletics, or creativity. Never a project that was too much for her..and her passion for animals was over the top. A true love of all creatures big and small.

I think of her daily and it brings a smile to my face to picture her giddy giggle and her willingness to do anything, just to be together.

Please know that i am here for all of you if you want to reach out...
we loved her so much and will miss Colleen forever...
 

As I read the many stories of my cousin Colleen, I am deeply saddened and yet choosing to remember the precious slices of time spent with her as a gift. I will remember Colleen as I knew her- a very warm and genuine person who made you feel happy when you are around her. I remember most her smile and energy. The D.C. McMahon’s will always remember the summers, Easters, and Christmases with a smile on our faces. Colleen is a very important part of our families lives and will be missed greatly and remembered always.

To the Coate and McMahon Families - Colleen was such a beautiful young woman - she will forever be missed and in our hearts.  My love and prayers go out to the family.  Aunt Maureen

Dan, It is abundantly clear what a deeply loving, caring and passionate woman Colleen was. Her many gifts shine through you every day. While I never met Colleen, I know through you, your grace and compassion, that she was a wonderful wife, mother, friend and companion. May her beauty, grace and wisdom endure through all she has touched. With my prayers, Mark

Dan-
Derek and I are keeping you and your family in our hearts.

With Love- Michal Beiningen

Dan, this was such a sad and shocking news to hear. Our most heartfelt and deepest condolences to you and the rest of the Coate family. Wish Hina and I could be there in person for the services planned in Colleens remembrance. We're sending you our thoughts and love from the other side of the world. Love, Saad and Hina.

Dan, my dear friend, I am so sorry to hear the news. As many have already expressed Colleen was an amazing women with a unique style and energy. My thoughts and prayers are with you, Emma, Jack, and Colleen's family. May she rest in peace.
Donna and Steve Lunn

My beautiful niece Colleen, she had an infectious smile and laugh that lit up the room. Colleen made people feel important and special. We are all better people for having known her loved her and had her in our lives. My niece my hero!

Sending all my love to Colleen’s wonderful family. My heart is broken for all of you. I know the absence of someone so beautiful and loved so completely is unbearable. Growing up, and I’m sure still today, the McMahon’s home was our collective home too... and by “our” I mean Nativity’s Class of ‘82! It remains to this day the ONLY home I was ever allowed to sleep over... for Colleen’s Bday party. Years go by in a blink... seems like yesterday we played with Barbies in the front yard (got caught by Kevin w/ the Barbies smooching), ski bus & chasing cute EA boys, HS proms... and then life got so “busy.” Col’s “started” so many years before mine did with marriage and kids... and I’ll always regret not keeping in touch in our later years. Still - and I think this is true of our entire class - we share a bond that will never be broken. We laugh the same, have the same loves, priorities, work ethics, senses of humor, even mannerisms. We were SO blessed with the gift of Nativity that our parents gave us. Colleen will always be in our hearts and part of who we are - as will the entire McMahon clan. I believe Heaven is all around us, and she surely will be guiding us through our days and showing us the beauty in the world and the joy that can still be found.
 All my love and hugs. -Anne

Let her memory be a blessing. Rest in peace Colleen

Is there anything like when Colleen saw you and her face opened into this sincere million dollar smile, and you could feel how much she loved you? Like the sun came right out of her. And when Col listened to you talk about something that was bothering you it was like she was trying to hear your feelings in your words and she looked at you like she wanted to read your face so she could understand how you felt. She experienced everything so intensely.

Col was truly the tenderest of vittles, so open hearted. I remember when Snooper went missing the night before her wedding (was it right before?), calling his name out and searching in ditches with flashlights. Col loved that little dog. She was so worried. (Thank god we found him or the wedding may have had to have been postponed and it was the most fun wedding ever). Or the night she accidentally hit a rabbit on a dark road on the way to the Point and it was like the end of the world - she felt so bad for that damn rabbit. It took a while to convince her we shouldn’t go back for it.

When Col was excited or happy you knew it. She had lots of different laughs, including an outburst laugh (HA!), a giggly-conspiratorial-should-we-really-be-laughing-about-this-laugh (with a demure tuck of her chin). Even her voice -- so many modulations, really high or low or whispers or shouts (usually with a smack on your arm and a NO!) and all in the space of a 1 minute conversation. Or if you told her something really outrageous she would hit you and say no and walk away and walk back, “Are you Serious!” Col’s handwriting was epic. She was left handed but even for a lefty it was completely bonkers. Like it matched the cascade of her thoughts or something. It was all bubbly and catty-wompus.

Col was drop dead gorgeous but never believed it. The woman who did her hair on her wedding day said something like, “Colleen we could shave you bald and you would still look beautiful.” She looked like a princess bride and danced like a fiend that night. I remember lessons at Jack Greenen’s dance studio in high school but Col’s moves were all her. Unteachable. Unmatchable. They defied all dance-move naming conventions.

I wish we were dancing. Or getting ready to go dancing (with Emma again to SXSW!). Or that we were little kids playing Barbies in Col’s front yard under the big pine trees. Or laughing in the Nativity girls’ bathroom. Or ice-skating on Freemans Pond or at the Y. Col could do a sort of an axel jump, I think she taught herself? It was like a piston firing - an energy burst. Like when she kicked ass at whatever sport she happened to be playing on any given day. She would crush it. Or I wish we were on the dock while she lifeguarded, talking about whatever. Lying on some old beat-up towels. A warped paperback copy of one of her Tolkien books by her side. She would probably waitressing later that day at the Sword. One of us was probably heartbroken or in love.

I try and imagine Col now with the dogs -- all of them including Snooper, and the birds (Merlin on one shoulder and Mr. T on the other), and the cat, and probably that damn bunny. And she’s started a vet clinic in animal heaven and is getting ready to go dancing with everyone she loves that’s up there with her. I love you Col and miss you. I love you, too, McMahons and Dan, Jack and Emma. Thank you for sharing Colleen with all of us and surrounding her with love and care, her whole life.

Note from the chief development officer of Wayside House...(Brooke, thanks for recommending them)

Hi Daniel,

What a beautiful tribute to your wife; I feel as if I know her through all the remembrances and photos shared. She was obviously very special and these gifts in her memory will help so much. There is such a strong history here at Wayside House and we are happy that Colleen and her family & friends will now be a part of that.

I will send thank you notes to all of the people who donate and will send you a list of names and addresses so you can know that as well. We are also grateful for the donations of some of her personal items and look forward to meeting you.