It has been said that as time passes, memories of our departed loved ones begins to fade - but the way they made us feel never leaves us. Some memories of Todd, like brief moments in time, are still quite vivid. Sadly, as the years go by, some precious memories are beginning to fade. However, I am thankful that how Todd made me feel will always be with me.
Todd had a unique way of making his friends and family smile or laugh. His presence often seemed to convey happiness and fun. The marine who read Todd’s Eulogy stated that his life was filled with happiness. Rarely was he seen down or depressed. Another Marine friend said they never saw him when he wasn't smiling. As one Marine exclaimed, "He was awesome!"
Although he had a great sense of humor, he also took the time to show he cared. His good natured and light-hearted ways could make it seem like whatever the problem was, things would eventually be ok. Even if he frustrated someone, he usually had a way of diffusing their frustration. As one friend said, “ He had a way of endearing himself to others.”
However, there was a serious and determined side to him which helped him accomplish much in his short life. He worked hard to earn two black belts in Martial Arts before graduating from high school. He stated that after he got out of the Marines, he was strongly considering college. One of the first things he wanted to do though, was marry his long time sweetheart and fiancee, Andrea. He also earned a spot on the 1/8 Marines Scout Sniper Platoon. His Captain shared how proud Todd looked going out on a mission that last day. However, he never boasted. He once said that he didn't want any of the Marines to know he was a black belt because everyone would then want to fight him. Even though he had the ability to be lethal, he was gentle and kind with others. However, he was definitely not a pushover and would stand up for what he believed was right, as well as the rights of others. But if someone did wrong, he knew there would be consequences to pay and accepted that.
We are thankful for those who took time to share their memories of him. Although many said he was great fun to be around, he also took time to show compassion for the underdog. We were told by many that he had a very caring heart. He would carry the umbrella for the girls going into the prom so their hair wouldn't get wet. One friend recalled that Todd was the kind of friend who would stay up all night in pouring rain to listen to your problems. Another friend shared that while he was struggling in boot camp, Todd took the time to write and encourage him to hang in there and pay his dues like all Marines must. It was said when times were really tough, Todd would lighten the mood by smiling, saying that at least they were miserable together. Others shared stories that always seemed to make them laugh. Some said he took time to show them little ways to make life more comfortable while in Iraq. Another recalled while on Float in the Mediterranean, having long talks with him on the deck. He said because of Todd’s encouragement, it helped him quit smoking. Todd’s scout sniper partner told us that he he is more understanding and has a kinder heart because of knowing Todd.
One thing I will always remember about Todd is the last time I saw him. He had come home one last time before deployment. He spent the whole week with us and didn't go see everyone else like he often did when he was home. He spent the final morning going through his things, as if looking back on his life. He seemed to be regretful about some things. Feeling very uneasy about his upcoming time in Iraq, I did not think I could bare to watch him leave. I stayed in the house and let his dad walk him to his car alone. Suddenly, I had a panicked feeling that I might never see him again and ran to the window for one last glimpse. After he said goodbye to loved ones and the safety of home, I watched him drive away. He had a firm, resolved look of determination on his face as he backed out of the driveway. That was the last time I saw him. I later learned that he had told one of the "Marine Moms" who visited Camp LeJeune frequently, that he did not have a good feeling about this deployment. He then asked her to look out for his family if something were to happen to him. She kept the promise sh made to him that day.
Todd also made me feel cared about, as though he would always be there for me. He was filled with life, love, and happiness that was shared with those he loved. I look forward to the day when I will see his smile and hear his laugh again. There will be no more separation. He will no longer be missed because 1st Thessalonians chapter 4, assures us that for those who believe that Jesus, God's only begotten Son, died and rose again will be together forever with the Lord. We that remain here can comfort one another with these words. The pain and separation we experience here is but for a short time. As II Corinthians 4:11 reminds us, "the things which are seen now are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal." We have a promise from God in His Word, that it is possible to not only be with the Lord forever in a place which is wonderful beyond our imagination, but also to be with other loved ones forever. I believe I will see Todd again. Although he was a happy person while he was here, his happiness is now complete because it is not marred by the sadness or pain that is in this world.
Whether we live to be 1, 21, or 101, it is all but a fleeting moment in time, compared to eternity. Although fun loving, Todd had a serious impact on many that knew him. According to his military chaplain, Todd's faith in God was apparent to the Marines who served with him. He went to war armed with faith in God and trust in God's promises. He believed I Corinthians 2:9 "Eye has not seen nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God has prepared for them that love him." He left some wondering about their eternal destiny. Please know that Romans 6:23 says "For the wages of sin is death (spiritual death and eternal separation from God); BUT the gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord." IJohn 5:13 says "These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God; that you may know that you have eternal life, and that you may believe on the name of the Son of God." We can have a truly wonderful future and a blessed and sure hope.
Todd loved his family and his country. His service to his country was honorable and noble. His sacrifice was tremendous. However, I believe his desire would be for this to be his legacy - that he wanted others to know about the one true and living God who is found in His book, the Bible.
If you care to share a memory or thoughts about him, please do so below. His family would love to hear from you. I hope that if you did not know him here on this earth, you will have the opportunity to meet him in Heaven. I can’t help but believe nothing would please him more.
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Tributes
Leave a tributemature for your age. You set the bar for Poolie Standards for the Marine
Corps. I have no doubt that you are with Jesus. I am looking forward to
seeing you again up there with our Lord.
MSgt. Dick Bowers, USMC, Ret'd.
Coping with your loss has not been easy for anyone who knew you, because you actively cared about people. You inspired me and so many others to find the confidence in our own abilities and push past our limits. When my son, Liam Todd, is a little bit older I will tell him about you, his namesake. Even beyond your death you continue to inspire me to be a better person in this world. Thank you. Today I celebrate your birthday and all the gifts you gave to the world and the people in it.
Semper Fi, brother.
you are with Jesus, who you strongly believed in. I hope to see you again in
heaven.
he was so mature compared to his friends who joined the Corps. I worked
for a bank when I retired. Todd used to stop in and bring me up to date on
all that was going on in his life. He would always inquire as to investments and the best way for him to save his money. He was with out a doubt the
most squared away Marine for his age. I would kidd him about him being
a lance colonel instead of a lance Corporal. Todd was truly a Christian and
proud of his faith. I am sure that he is with our Lord and Savior now. For me
he will never be forgotten.
squard away Marines that I have had the pleasure of knowing. You set the bar high for others to follow. I know that you were a Christian and had a strong faith and there is no doubt as to where you are. You are probably quarding the Gates of Heaven. I miss you Corporal Godwin.
"Semper Fidelis".
MSgt. Dick Bowers, USMC, Ret'd.
IN MATURITY. I KNOW WHERE YOU ARE AND I WILL SEE YOU AGAIN SOME DAY. BESIDES BEING A REAL MARINE, YOU WERE A TRUE CHRISTAIN. I AM SURE YOU ARE WALKING GUARD DUTY AROUND THE GATES OF HEAVEN IN DRESS BLUES. I STILL HAVE YOU ON THE BACK WINDOW OF MY CAR FOR ALL TO SEE. YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN IN MY PRAYERS. "SEMPER FIDELIS", MASTER SERGEANT DICK BOWERS, ZANESVILLE, OHIO
ON THE BACK WINDOW OF MY VEHICLE. HE WILL ALWAYS BE THE MOST SQUARED AWAY MARINE THAT I HAVE KNOWN.
the people that are still in your life, after 10 years of "one day at a time", out-of-no-where emotional breakdowns, collapsing in tears at the slightest sight, sound, smell that you recognize from the "before"...they're the ones who GET IT.
losing my brother divided my life into the "before" and the "after". life in the "after" will always carry a palpable feeling of absence. because that one person who was so many things to so many people, is just gone.
unless youve gone through your own personal hell in the aftermath of losing someone like this...accept it as beyond your control. we're not "on the clock". theres no timecard to punch when youre done grieving. i grieve for my brother every day. its not any easier now than it was 10 years ago.
i want to say thank you for posting this about Todd. The most comfort ive ever felt was from knowing that too many other families also share this terrible common thread. they could put all of us in one room and nothing would ever need to be said. we live it every day.
i wish i were one of those people who truly feel that the death of a loved one should be more of a celebration of their life than anything debilitating, but im not. i never will be. i feel like people are waiting for me to "get back to normal"....failing to realize "normal" has ceased to exist.
there are so many reasons i take comfort in reading things like this and am so grateful in knowing im not alone, and that those who know what ive gone and continue going through know its not because im "crazy"...because they're there too.
God Bless Our Fallen,
Christina Gavriel
mama-hawk@att.net
Your Platoon Commander, Brother, and Friend, Mike
Leave a Tribute
mature for your age. You set the bar for Poolie Standards for the Marine
Corps. I have no doubt that you are with Jesus. I am looking forward to
seeing you again up there with our Lord.
MSgt. Dick Bowers, USMC, Ret'd.
One squared away Marine
passing. I will never forget the shock that I felt. I prayed for Todd, knowing that he was very
strong in his faith in Jesus and he is without a doubt in Heaven with our Lord. Every year at this time he is remembered. Todd please put a good word in for me with our Lord.
Semper Fidelis,
MSgt. Dick Bowers
(This article was written by Todd's mother for the local newspaper on the 10th anniversary of 9/11).
Thinking back on the days prior to 9/11/01, it is almost as if it was a time of innocence for our country. With the exception of a few reprieves here and there, we have always lived with wars or the threat of wars. But, for probably the average citizen, the thought of being attacked on our own land, with thousands of civilians killed, was something we did not seriously consider or worry about. Our nation was too big, too strong, too mighty. Then in a matter of moments, the unthinkable happened. We all watched in helpless horror as our fellow citizens were killed in front of our very eyes from an enemy that some never imagined was such a threat to us.
After the initial shock of it all began to subside, something incredible began to happen. A display of patriotism surfaced in our country that was said to have not been seen since WWII. On 9/12/01, our military recruiting offices were deluged with people wanting to enlist. American flags began to fly from many homes and cars, people displayed bumper stickers supporting our troops, many took the time to stop and thank individual service members - wishing them well, and tears would fall, unashamedly, from people’s eyes during the National Anthem. We were proud of our troops and proud to be an American! What had been comparatively petty grievances and politics were put aside. People seemed to care about others. Our way of life, our sense of security, and the future of our children became a real and serious threat. We went in preservation mode and committed ourselves to a common cause of seeing our enemy brought to justice. We were a united people.
However, there would be a price to pay in accomplishing this goal. Many people’s lives would sadly never be the same, and many lives would be lost in the search for justice. Shortly after seeing the planes hit the towers, it did not take long for the realization to hit me that our nation would need to avenge the deaths of these innocent lives and that would mean war. I thought then of my own son, Todd, who had joined the Marines in July of 2001. He was in still in Boot Camp at Parris Island, S.C. I wanted desperately to talk with him and find out what was happening there. But, all communications are cut off from the outside world as the Marine Corps molds a young person into becoming one of the Few and the Proud. With the exception of one brief phone call, we did not see or talk to Todd until we saw him at his graduation which was 3 weeks after 9/11. When I asked him what he knew about the events of that awful day, he replied, “Oh yea, I remember hearing something about that.” The only reason he knew anything about the terrorist attacks at all was because some of the Marine recruits had to go home for funerals of loved ones who had perished on that day. I shook my head in disbelief that someone whose life was about to change forever, because of the events of that day, knew so little about it. I had saved a few magazines and newspaper clippings for him about 9/11. He was so eager, so young, only 18 yrs old, having enlisted right after high school.
The atmosphere was electrifying and filled with anticipation at the Marine Corps base, which was on high alert, as families gathered to watch the graduation of over 1,000 Marines from Boot Camp. Many parents watched with pride and apprehension as they performed their drills in unified perfection. Everyone cheered and you could hear an occasional Ooh-Rah! However, I couldn’t help but wonder with apprehension what the fate would be of these young men and women as war was then imminent. Little could I have known at that time, that my own son would be the first casualty in his Battalion during this war some 3 years later.
Todd had said that being a Marine was what he was to do with his life and the events of 9/11 only seemed to further compel him to do his best. He never wanted to be bragged about though, and seemed a little embarrassed by the attention he received as a member of the military at that time. He was just doing what he had been trained to do.
Todd was easy-going, but could have a stubborn streak. He was very determined when he wanted something, having earned 2 black belts by the time he graduated from high school. However, he had a very non-threatening nature and had a way of making things seem ok. He loved his family, his friends, his fiancée and God, and he was loved by them. His Marine buddies stated in his eulogy that his life was filled with happiness. He also filled other’s lives with fun and happiness with his presence. Todd got along well with others and tried his best to see that those he cared about got along. Although he was a peacemaker, his mission in life eventually became to go to war. We figured if anyone can make it back home, he could. He was tall and strong, well-trained, confident, and seemingly invincible. He also was gentle, loving, and kind but tough as any Marine Scout Sniper could be. He was often considerate of others. Even right before deploying to Iraq, he wasn’t thinking of himself. Sensing that he would not be returning home, he asked someone to “look out for my family.”
I recall reading about a young man from Todd’s Battalion who had written a letter to his mother shortly before he was killed. In his letter, he asked simply, “remember me.” For someone who has made the ultimate sacrifice, I believe that is so little to ask. I know we will never forget. HIs absence from us will be felt for the rest of our lives. But, if his life, and death, has helped make our country a safer place to be, if he in some way has helped to deter the threat of terrorism in the world, I believe that it has not been in vain.