Back on the dock after offshore fishing - Ft. Myers, FL
front porch chats
Shared by Carly Talbott on 10/12/2013

I started working for Dayna and Barrett about 8 months ago as Jacqueline's nanny. When I met Dayna for coffee in February for my interview, I had no idea I was meeting a family that would change my life forever. Over the course of my time with them, I have seen first hand just how incredible these people are. I couldn't believe how cool they were; they just seemed to figure out the flow, the flow of being parents, but still being totally awesome. 

Barrett, of course, was a huge reason for that. Right off the bat, he was one of the nicest people I had ever met. He told me, "just be yourself, and you will be Jacqueline's best friend in no time", and he was right. The more time I spent the Jacqueline, the more I began to realize that she is, hands down, the coolest kid I've ever met. The more time I spent with Dayna and Barrett, the more I realized exactly why Jacqueline is that way.

Some of my favorite memories of Barrett were spent late at night. Barrett would come home from work, exhausted from working a 12 hour day, but so happy to be home. He would offer me a Heineken, and then we would talk. One of my favorite talks with Barrett took place outside on the front porch at the table. Dayna was working late that night and Jacqueline was fast asleep. 

Barrett started to tell me about Dayna, and how they met. He said, "I remember when I first met her, I saw her and she was SMOKIN HOT.. of course, she's beautiful now, but back then.. Dayna was smokin". He went on to tell me that Dayna was kind of dating one of his friends, but that wasn't going to work for him. He said he remembered having talks with her about what she did for a living - and she told him, this is what I do, the restautant biz. Barrett was blown away becuase he felt the same way about his work. It was not a seasonal job, or an in between thing, but what he did - what they did. They shared this passion. He said he knew he had to have her. 

He went on to tell me, "right before I found out Dayna was pregnant, I had saved up almost $30,000. It was the most money I had ever saved, I was going to buy a boat. Instead, I got Jacqeuline". He said, "who needs a boat when you have her?". He told me he asked Dayna to marry him at least 5 times before she finally agreed. I never asked Dayna if this was true, but it makes me laugh to think of him asking her time and time over to be his wife, she's a smart one :) 

Barrett loved to tell me stories about life, he was so genuinely interested in me and where my life was going - and he used his experience to help me figure out my own path. As a 24 year old girl, I am often confused about where life is going to take me, but I remember what Barrett said to me: "Don't worry Carly, your 20's are awesome, but your 30's are so much better". I know he felt this way because of his family - because of Dayna and Jacqueline, and because of the infitite love they had, and will continue to share.

I know now that fate brought me to the Anding's, and that I was destined to know Dayna, Barrett, and Jacqueline. I feel so lucky to have been such an integral part of their family, and to see first hand just how wonderful they are. No little girl is as lucky as you, Jacqueline, because you're half Barrett, and half Dayna. You really hit the jackpot! (and so did I, meeting all of you). I love you, Barrett. Your energy and spirit are eternal, and we will all carry you with us forever. Thank you for welcoming me to your family, I plan on hanging out with them indefinitely.

PS - The last time I saw you, you were blasting Snoop Dogg from a speaker when you came into the house - for some reason, this makes me think you're kickin it with Bob Marley... I have a feeling you are. 

Batting Practice
Shared by Ben Crowley on 10/11/2013

Barrett was always a character.  Truly an unforgettable guy with a free spirit.  I have nothing but fond memories of him.  Funny how you remember very specific things about people when they leave us. 

During batting practice in the multi-purpose room at the Prep one spring, Barrett bunted a ball directly off of his nose.  I'll never forget the expression on his face after he did that.  He shrugged it off as if he did it all the time and kept on hitting.  I think that is what I'll remember best about him.. he just kept moving forward.

My heart aches for his family but I am sure Barrett is going to be just fine...

Shared by Michelle Mandelman Wildes on 10/11/2013

I met Barrett in the summer of ’03 at Oak Beach.  It was my first introduction to my now my in-laws (Mandelman’s), and to the rich history of Oak Beach.  I was nervous.  The two people who made me feel immediately welcome and included were Barrett and Walt.  I feel like they took me under their wing so to speak;)  I realized then, and ever since, that Barrett was an incredibly compassionate and sincere person.  He loved a good talk.  He was so open minded and loving to everyone around him.  He shared, listened, and asked meaningful questions about life, our children, and the struggles we all face.  Even if Barrett only had 5 minutes before he needed to catch the ferry back over to Fire Island, he always made the time for a quick hug and kiss to our entire family scattered around the beach house.  We would swap a quick milestone about each of our little girls who are the same age.  I was in awe of the father that Barrett had become.  He adored his Jacqueline. And was so proud of her.  I am grateful that she will carry on his spirit, and that of Barrett’s beloved grandmother, Jacqui.

Shared by Christopher Elbert on 10/10/2013

I lived with Barrett and Dana for several months in the spring/summer 2007 and 2008.  We were part of a community; we laughed, shot darts, worked, and drank up life, Dana and Barrett fell in love.  

In hindsight this was paradise.  However paradise isn’t a place where you go.  It is how you feel for a moment in your life when you’re a part of something. And if you find that moment, it last forever (Alex Garland, The Beach).

Though this week has been painful and the road to normalcy will be long, I take some solace that this paradise is part of the place where Barrett is now.  Riding his Mets bike on the way to a softball game!


Christmas in Sanibel
Shared by Lorraine Cowl on 10/10/2013

I remember clearly when Barrett brought home 2 large xmas trees. One for his family and the other for the restaurant.  He was so happy and felt great about purchasing the trees from the Sanibel Lions Club.  He had a true spirit of community:  He loved Sanibel and it's people.  He loved life. But  what shined mostly was his love for Dayna and Jacqueline

Bottle of A1 Please
Shared by Chris Day on 10/10/2013

The first time I met Barrett was our first meal at the CIA. We had steak. Barrett, of course, broke the ice. He wanted to see the reaction of the server if he asked for a bottle of A1. Don't ask me why but at the time I thought it was the funniest thing I had ever seen. Barrett had a way that could make the dullest moment seem bright.
He will truly be missed

A child's laughter
Shared by Marc Rocca on 10/10/2013

I moved back east from Ohio in the summer of ’78 and was living above The Fife and Drum.  One beautiful summer day Barrett, barely a toddler, was in his car seat waiting to go somewhere with the family.  I started playing with him, crouching below the car door window and pooping up saying, “Peek-a-boo” only to hear that infectious laughter of a child.  That time always came to mind whenever I thought of Barrett and I will never forget that day

So kind
Shared by Ryan Kelly on 10/09/2013
Barrett, I had a party in HS. You came, and I felt so lucky you were there. I was not popular, and I had someone who was there. Then we talked about where we were in our lives, and I told you something. You never judged me. You held the "secret"/not so secret. Thank you for always being kind, thank you for being you. I don't have words. Ryan Xoxo
Shared by Tom Welsh on 10/09/2013

Barrett was a classmate of mine at the Prep, and I recall a fun-loving, outgoing, smiling guy.  He fixed me up when I needed a homecoming date, and was always around if you needed a laugh or a pick-me-up.  After our junior year, on a Classics trip with Dr. Bender to Italy, he literally broke up the monotony of a museum tour by accidentally crashing through a giant plate glass window.  I don't remember anything else about the museum visit, but I do remember his face right after it happened, and the way he took it all in stride.

While my memories of Barrett are mostly of a teenager in a sport coat and tie, they were all really fond memories.  My deepest condolences to his wife, daughter, and all of his family.

Kairos 1995
Shared by Michael Thomas on 10/09/2013
Kairos Retreat_1995

I cannot share the stories because it was something very private to Barrett, Tony, Rudy, Chuck, Kelly, Scott, Mr. Czudak and myself but don't believe for one second I don't remember what each of us talked about when we were together as our small group. Live the 4th!

Shared by Emily Christianson on 10/09/2013

A lifetime of memories as kids on our families vacations to Bucks County, Sanibel and the ocassional Fire Island and I don't even know where to start.  Playing hide and go seek in the corn fields behind your family's house, playing on the beach in Sanibel and collecting shells. Also remember karaoke nights in Washington Crossing...Oakridge Boys...Elvira. More recently I loved hearing stories of sweet Jacqueline and how vivacious a child she is. 

Your family is family to me and always will be.  My heart is sad but this site is a great way for Jacqueline to always be able to read stories and see photos.

I know we have lots of fun photos that can be shared, but they pre-date the digital era so I will go through and scan some to post.

Much love, Emily

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