Chuck
This memorial was created in memory of David Van Lokeren, born on September 23, 1944 and passed away on October 31, 2014. We will remember him always.
Tributes
Leave a tributeChuck
Thoughts today are with you and your big beautiful family.
I cry as I write these words. To know you was a pleasure and a priviledge. You were a spirit I profoundly connected with, and my greatest hope is that we can connect again in whatever existence is beyond this pale of tears. You left such an impression on this world and me, especially.
Loved in this life and any live hereafter.
I wish that we could have spent a lot more time together. Especially I wished that I could played billiards at your home in Rhode Island.
I think of you often....rest in peace.
Rest in peace
your love for others is what remains most vivid - you truly lived St. Paul's words and were an example for so many of us. Thank you.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. . .
A very good man.
It's was a privilege to know you and play billiards with you. You left this earth far too soon, and I'll always fondly remember the short time we had together.
Richard
I hope you know how much I miss you and love you.
Mary Alice
Every single morning I turn on a very special small light beneath a small memorial I have for you and I say "Good Morning David".
I miss you every day.
I love you so much.
Mary Alice, your devoted sister.
A day does not go by that I don't think about you.
You are forever missed.
Love,
Your sister-Mary Alice
a year and a day later
Snoopy (in Nov 1, 2015) Peanuts comic
shoots some pool
http://www.gocomics.com/peanuts
reminding me of Dave
(if viewed after Nov 1, 2015 please select Nov 1, 2015 date)
John
Our David was a beautiful man.
Mary Alice Fox
Love,
Mary
I miss our daily talks. You became so wise. Maybe it takes 70 years??
I know, I know, I know.....nobody Knows........
I Love you,
Your little sister.
Mary
The "things" he loved were many and included his family, friends, movies, jokes, sailing, billiards and beautiful ladies. His love of spirituality, psychology, his fellow man and his God were areas which he never tired of exploring.
Dave was a true gamer, ready for the next experience and always said "yes" when I asked if he was ready for another adventure, even if he wasn't feeling well. He was the ultimate "wing man" and I will miss my buddy.
Fast Eddie.
Imagine how I felt having Dave as a roommate when we traveled around the country to play in 3 Cushion National Championships.
All I can say is I will always cherish the very special times I had Dave to myself. What a special person!
In the world of 3 cushion billiards Dave was admired and respected like none before him. This because of much more than talent and his competitive nature, this because he was the ultimate gentleman. Gracious in defeat or victory and gracious in life.
True, I only met and knew David because of the passion we shared over this game of 3 cushion billiards but I knew he had much more to offer his beautiful family and the world. Seems he let no one down.
God bless the Vanlokoren family, my thoughts and prayers are with you. I am going to miss David so very much. I'll never forget him!
Love, Julia
I remember our tennis matches years later at Eddy Farm. Of course, they weren't really matches: He won every set we ever played, except one (which I'm sure he let me win). We were both ferocious out on the court -- worrisome, no doubt, to those who played on the courts beside us. Getting pummeled and out-hustled was never so much fun!
Dave, as everyone knows, had real class. And empathy. He made it a point always to ask what was happening with the family, job, etc., and was reluctant most times to talk about himself.
With Dave, it was always, 'onward, upward.' Bless him for that spirit.
" Gentleman Dave" It was well deserved. My friend you will truly be missed. To his family we the members of the USBA are deeply sorry for your loss.
Leave a Tribute
Chuck
Thoughts today are with you and your big beautiful family.
Gentleman Dave
Miss you Dave, sincerely. I'll always feel blessed to have known you and privileged to call you my friend.
"Elmo" was the affectionate term Michael & David used for each other. This letter to Michael is posted at his request.
A long Overdue letter to a Brother
Dear Elmo,
I've wanted to write you for quite some time now. I'm going to try and cover the good, the bad and the ugly of our history, but just so you know, in the end I see it as all pretty wonderful.
As a qualifier, I need to say up front that this can be no more than my own limited perception and that I don't believe any two people on the planet experience and interpret the same reality in the same way.
First off, I think mom and dad were wonderful, kind hearted and wanted to be the best parents they could be. They lavished material things on us which was a high priority for the generation coming after the depression. They also demonstrated a good moral code and high ethical standards. Not too bad a job right there in and of itself. But in a way they were children themselves and were very much focused on their own rising success, social standing and having fun.
They thought by giving us the freedom and responsibility to raise ourselves we would be strong and independent. I can't remember them ever sitting down and doing a homework assignment with us or even checking to see if we did our homework. I don't remember seeing them at ballgames very often, although I could be mistaken. I do remember staying out to all hours at a very young age with no one to answer to.
For me personally and I won't speak for anyone else, it left me with no self- discipline, low self-esteem and a third grade education when I exited high school. I guess the worst part was I never felt a strong connection to mom or dad which left me with something less than a strong sense of who I was.
But all of this is really only to lay a framework for what I really want to talk about and that is our relationship.
Dad was no doubt an alpha, as were you and even Vickie to some extent. I came along and attempted to assert myself, evidenced by my uncontrollable temper, but eventually succumbed and went underground (introverted and passive). This would eventually lead to a severe depression and running away to a commune. But I'm getting ahead of myself.
You and I became polarized and alienated at a very young age. There was probably even a certain amount of meanness between us. Believe me when I tell you I attribute all of this to nothing more than children who were left to themselves without the balanced love and disciplined they so much need on a daily basis. Parenting has to be a top priority and a singular focus. I'm not judging Mom and Dad. I can't afford to, I made too many mistakes raising my own children.
I just wanted you to know that all that history has been entirely healed within me and I hope is also healed in you.
I had such an emptiness in me for so long, I read everything I could comprehend in philosophy, theology, metaphysics and psychology to fill the void. I want to tell you that I learned one of the greatest lessons of my life from you when we were doing the moving in Florida a couple of years ago.
As we were moving things from one house to another, you engaged every person that crossed our path. You left each of them uplifted if not laughing. I could not believe the energy you gave and received from those encounters.
I had spent most of my life talking more to myself than to others. After those few days with you, I wanted to be just like you when I had spent so many years trying to be different from you.
Ever since that time I go out of my way to engage every waitress, checkout person and individual on the street I can. It has been life changing for me. When Linda and I were in NYC, I was out of control messing with people and it was so much fun and life giving. I was going down the elevator one morning to get coffee for Linda and me and these two 55 year old women were talking about their diets and struggles with their weight. I said you two women look great, you're a couple of babes if you ask me. They started laughing and continued laughing all the way through the lobby. The whole encounter put a spring in my step also.
I want to be just like you when I grow up. I guess that's the way it is supposed to be between brothers, I just didn't know it.
Much love,
Elmo
B w/ B
For years there has been a group of guys meeting for lunch on Tuesdays at a bar called The Dirty Drummer here in Phoenix. The luncheons were inspired by Ben Bada who is now 85 and who did concrete for our business for nearly 30 years. On Tuesdays the burgers are 1/2 price. David became a regular at "Burgers With Ben" and everyone enjoyed his jokes and wisdom. NOBODY ever ordered anything except burgers- except for Dave's first time when he ordered pastrami on rye. Immediately everything went silent in the bar, as if he had just committed the ultimate crime. He never ordered anything except a burger ever since. As a side note when brother Michael came for a couple of visits he joined us and, in true Michael form, suggested that he had possibly had an affair with Karen's (pictured above) mom in Detroit and that she was his daughter. Karen got a chuckle out of it and now we refer to Michael as her surrogate dad.