Let the memory of my father Dhanpat Rai Gupta in our heart and soul
` be with us forever
  • 81 years old
  • Born on September 26, 1898 in Meerut, Lawar, U.P., India.
  • Passed away on April 26, 1980 in Dehradun, U.P., India.

This memorial website was created in memory of our loved one, DHANPAT RAI GUPTA, 81, born on September 26, 1898 and passed away on April 26, 1980. We will remember him forever. He was son of  Lala Sagar Mal, grandson of Lala Dewan Singh, great grand son of Lala VilhasRai.

Babu Ji married to Prakash Wati Gupta of Muzaffernagar belonged to Goyal Family. Babuji were brothers of Ganpati Rai Gupta, Birbal Prashad Bansal and Ratana Lal Bansal. He was at second number of brothers. His sisters were Daya Wati and Dhan Wati. 

Amma ji , as above mentioned was from Goyal family. Her sisters were Aasha  Davi and Seeta Davi. Aasha Davi were not having any kids but Seeta Davi were having one son Prem Nidhi and daughters Sukumari and one more.

Babu Ji and Ammaji gave birth to Rajender Kuma.. Sukumar Chandra, Sushil Kumar and Subodh Kumar.

Sukumar and Subodh left us to join Babuji and Ammaji. Rajender Kumar is in Chandausi, India and Sushil is in Wisconsin U.S.A. Both of their wife passed away.

Babu ji was Attorney by profession and Homeopathic Doctor by hobby.

He has done B.A. LLB and D.H.M. He was in addition to homeopathy was active member of Rajvansh Sabha, a society and hold the position of Secerety of the society. He was although from a farmering back ground but was the first in family to open three cinemas in Meerut. Evening time was working late nights.

To be completed shortly.....


I am

son of Babu ji

Sushil Kumar Bansal







Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 3rd March 2019
Dear Babaji Ammaji
I find myself thinking of you more and more now that Papa is gone too to join you. I read your letters and it hurts to see how much pain you both suffered - both physical and emotional. We should not have left you at your age - all alone. May be it was the stress that caused your cancer, Babaji... we will never know. But I don't think I or anyone else can imagine the pain you went through missing us. We missed you very much. I remember Mummy and I both used to cry a lot whenever we received your letters - which was every time the diplomatic bag arrived. But still it is easier for the one who goes away than for the one who remains. And so I know that your pain was much greater. We had lots of distractions here - new places, new friends, new environment. You had to live in the house where you probably saw us through the eyes of your mind...walking around.
I think about you all the time now. Last few years, especially since Papa became very ill, I didn't think of anyone or anything but him - and how to make things better for him. And I am guilty of not thinking of you as much. But you were always in my heart. I miss those days - those were simpler days; simpler life and a life well loved - much more than any child has a right to be loved. You gave me everything and I was not there. Sometimes I wonder if I could bear seeing your pain. I don't know but I should have been there. I would feel better if I had. And Ammaji, I don't know why you were not able to come here. But we are very guilty of not looking after you and being with you after Babaji was gone. If we had been there, there would still have been a huge hole with Babaji gone - but you would have been at home - in familiar environment - with family who always lived with you. You were very strong - much stronger than I can ever be.
Please show me a way now so you can be proud of me. I don't think I have been a person you would have approved but I will try to do better from now. I promise. I want to keep your memory alive - please show me how.
I miss you so much and my heart aches for you - for the time we missed together - for all we could have done together - for all the hugs I missed. Your's Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 3rd February 2019
Dear Ammaji
I think of you so often now and miss you more every day. The good thing is that I can see your face clearly in my mind whenever I think of you. I can always go back and sit with you - in the Sun reading newspaper or magazine; reading poems 'bhagwan tumharai..'; play cards - rami and other games we played; sit in Mummy Papa's room with you in the afternoon and listen to bahno ka program... All is very fresh in my memory after all these years.
In my head I watch myself go back to the Vijaynagar home and find things the way they were. They won't and that is why I will never go there because I want to keep my memories as they were - but it is a happy wish....
Ammaji I was so very lucky to have been a part of your life for almost 18 years and no one can take that away. Even after Babaji when I came couple of times, I remember talking at night and you would tell me how things had been going around in the family. I miss all that. I miss you - very much.
Lovingly Your granddaughter
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 1st January 2019
Happy New Year, wherever you are -- Babaji & Ammaji.
Wish you were here!
Love you always... Missing you forever....
Your's Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 31st December 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji
Another year draws to a close... without you... and without Papa Mummy. I would give anything to go back and experience one of those days again when we were all together. It was such a simple time... so cozy... and happy...
I am thankful for the bond we had because now that it has been more than 21 years since even Ammaji went away, I can still see your face and hear your voice and feel your touch as it yesterday. This is a blessing not many have and it is because you loved me so very much. Knowing how much you love me keeps me going and I know I will see you again some day.
Love you and miss you. Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 29th December 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji
Today it has been a year since Papa left me. I miss you all so very much. It has been a wonderful journey together with a whole lot of heartaches, pain but much more joy. I was lucky to be part of your family... I was lucky to have your love... And I am lucky to have hundreds of your letters - you wrote almost every day! We used to cry a lot as we read them and missed you so much. I wish we hadn't left you - especially at that age - even to come to the States. That is the only think I would change if I could - in my entire life. We should not have left you. Now that I have lots of time since Papa no longer needs me, I think often of the pain you must have gone through living without us... it is very painful to me - I am sure I can feel the pain you felt.
Babaji, I did not take care of Ammaji the way I should have after you were gone. You wanted us to be with her - you said so. But we were too busy living our lives, making a life for us here. It is not something that I can undo now. Just a forever regret and knowledge of not doing right by her. I loved her very much; and I often think of her now - probably just a little more than I do of you...
I remember those mornings and afternoons we would sit in Mummy's room - Ammaji, Mummy and me - and listen to 'Behno ka program' and different plays on radio... Read 'Aapka Bunti' in Hindustan magazine. I miss Ammaji's 'alu ka halwa' - namak wala; Til ki barfi; Gur ki barfi; so many things. I miss sitting with Ammaji and making those Dashara and Diwali Roli. That was a lot of fun! Miss your infinite supply of fulghari!!
More than anything I miss seeing you and just sitting with you.
Come in my dream sometime and let me know you are doing okay and that I will see you again.
Love you and miss you. Your's Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 6th December 2018
Dear Ammaji
Suddenly as I was sitting here, I thought of your hands and I could see them as if I just saw them yesterday. I have a happy memory of sitting on the khat in the sun and touching your arm and saying 'ammaji your arms are so soft' as I felt the slight wrinkles on them! That's just one of the many happy days we spent together.
I think of you and Babaji often and miss you very very much.
Love you Your's Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 27th November 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji
First one without all four of you.
Please give me strength to get through the day and live rest of my life in a way that you would approve. Give me the wisdom to cherish your memories and at the same time cherish what I still have. I am convinced that you sent Chris to me; otherwise how does one account for having such a undeserved gift in life? Please help me to honor your gift and love him the way he deserves at the same time I keep you in my heart and my memory.
Missing you very much today. Your's Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 3rd November 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji
Yesterday I watched a movied called 'Lion'. After 25 years of being lost at a train station in India, this kid who is now a man finally found the place where he left his Mom. And so he goes back to India and travels to his little village. Once he gets there, he is walking toward the home that he knew as a kid of 5 years of age... As he is walking, he is growing more and more anxious with anticipation of seeing his Mum again. As he was walking, I was walking with him and had such a strong feeling of walking toward the Vijaynagar home. And I felt the anticipation I would have felt of seeing the two of you! I was overwhelmed with a very strong emotion and had tears in my eyes. How happy you would have been to see me and what an awesome moment that would have been to touch you again; to hug you once again; to see you again!
I miss you so much - more than I can say. Ammaji, I feel such pain in my heart now knowing I didn't take care of you; didn't come for a visit for so long!
Can you see me now? Please, please give me a sign that I am forgiven; that you know the love I have for you in my heart! At this time of year, there was all that hustle and bustle of white-washing the house; making all those sweets - Tilgozi was my best favorite; also there was that 'gud ki lauz' that I loved... Miss those days... Missing you. Your's Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 24th October 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji
Diwali is coming and I am thinking of all those 'phoolgharis' you used to get for me. There used to be an infinite supply and it kept coming. Just when I thought it was the last one, there was another box. I can picture it just as it was then. 1976 was the last time you handed me the last box - none of us knew it then. I miss all that; miss you both; miss the life I used to have and we shared.
I feel sad but then I think that at least I had it once. How many children grow up with so much love? Our love was strong and that is why it has lasted all these years! Yes, I have been lucky. I have never lacked in love in my life and what more can one ask for? I wish you would come in my dreams more - that is all I can ask now and still.
See you in my dreams and see you when I get there.
No one calls me 'Gudia' anymore.
Love and miss you. Your's Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 7th October 2018
From Papa --
"I held you close in my heart today... It made me feel complete... You may have died, but you are not gone... You will always be a part of me... As long as the Sun shines... the wind blows... the rain falls..."
Love you and miss you very much, Dear Babaji and Ammaji Your's Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 6th October 2018
Respected Babaji and Ammaji
This time you have Papa with you on his birthday. I would really love to see you all in my dream tonight...
I heard your voices on the DVD that Papa left for me. It took me back to those days when you were still somewhere I could reach. You were very very ill but you were thinking of me and how sad I was. You worried so about me. I tell everyone that story about you bringing me samosas when the practical exam had gotten delayed at St. Thomas! It was such a thing at the time - "Shalini's Babaji brought samosas for her" :-) Just one of many sweet and happy memories of my life.
Miss you both very much. Your's Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 26th September 2018
Happy 120th Birthday Babaji And 112th Ammaji - Wherever you are... We never celebrated these days when we were together but... I haven't remembered it in many years but now that all four of you are together, I miss you afresh and you are on my mind just like in the beginning when we first came here. Sometimes I just picture it how it would be to have you here now - what you would do and say and whether you would approve of me. I hope you do. There are times when I am not at my best but I do try. I know you are sad at the turns of events that have taken with us but it cannot be helped. I can't even forgive myself - so how can I do that for others who have hurt people I love so much? Missing you on this day and always. Your's Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 25th September 2018
Dear Babaji Ammaji
Wish you were here for this day and could meet Chris. You would love him and know that I am safe and loved. You loved me so much and worried about me even more. But I am sure you can see from wherever you are that I am alright. I miss you more than ever - now that Papa has also gone to be with you. He kept me very busy :) I miss him more than he could know; but may be he did know. That is why he hung on for so long and suffered so much.
I miss you all very much.
Especially on special days...
Love you Your's Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 23rd September 2018
Respected Babaji and Ammaji
Here are Papa Mummy - at Sea. How short the time was for us to be together and yet I can remember things and your faces, voices - just like yesterday. You all will live on in my heart and memories forever.
Until we meet again. Your's Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 10th September 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji
I need to see you... Need to see you one more time.
It has been so long. Now I have all the time to think about you, miss you, read your letters - read about some of the things I forgot somehow. And a renewed sense of having been lucky to have you - for a short time - but a significant time of my life - with me to to love you and to have been loved by you.
I am sorry to have lost touch with you for so long. Papa Mummy had kept me busy but even before I think I got too busy with myself. You were my life. You gave me so much and I could not do anything when you needed me.
I want to see you one more time. In my dreams...
Your's Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 7th September 2018
Respected Babaji, Ammaji
Last of the four will be going to Sea in less than 2 days... It never occurred to me that such a day will come. But then I never could imagine a life without you... without Papa Mummy. Papa has been gone more than 8 months already.
I am guilty of many things - not taking care of any of you. Papa is more recent and so his memory haunts me more. It is still not real to me. I keep seeing him sitting in the Belmont lounge last October 21st wiping his tears as he said goodbye to us. I wonder if he knew we won't see each other again...
Still, to me it is a gift from all of you that whenever I think of you, which is often, I can clearly picture you and see you and whenever I want, I can sit close to you and feel you. Your love sustains me. I was the most loved child ever and was very lucky to have been part of your family.
I will see you again some day when time is right. I know you will come for me.
Missing you. Love you.
Your Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 24th July 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji
You won't forget what I asked for today? I know you can hear me from wherever you are...
Love you and miss you very much Your's Guria
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 16th July 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji
So much forgotten memories have come back now that I am re-reading your letters you wrote so long ago - almost in another lifetime. It makes me sad as I miss you even more. But at the same time it makes me happy because I was the most loved child in the whole World! I am very lucky to have been born in your family... when I feel sad, I will try to remember that and smile because I know you would want me to. I am finally in a position when I can start planning for something that will keep your name alive forever and help to further the cause that was closest to your heart (other than me :) ). I know Homeopathy was your passion and I will make sure that the research will go on - as much as I can possibly make sure. I am so excited and am sure that somehow you have inspired me to do this. I feel happy... I know you are somewhere and are happy too... Love you and miss you very much Yours Guria
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 5th July 2018
Respected Babaji, Ammaji
I was reading your letters yesterday as I am trying to sort them so that I can make digital copies. I feel really strange since then because there is such a contrast in the simplicity and happiness of those days compared to here and now. We caused you so much pain and suffering by leaving you on your own. While we also missed you terribly here but it is always easier for ones who leave than to the ones who are left behind. You two were so alone and at that age you needed us with you. We made a mistake - a terrible one. I don't know how life would have turned out had we stayed but I do know that I would have your love for several more years. I can hear your voice as I read the letters as if it was just yesterday when I heard it. I know there is still a connection and all I can do is hope that I will see you again some day. Please help me to be a person worthy of so much love. Sometimes I don't do a very good job. But I will try and remember it every day that I am one of the luckiest people ever to have had a family that I did - to have you two who enveloped me in so much love and protected me for so long. Babaji, you wrote in one of your letters - "I do not like to be a liability on anyone but I don't know why but I would like to live to see you all back again." And Ammaji wrote in one after Babaji, you were gone, "I was in Meerut last month and while there I missed your babaji very much". It broke my heart. Ammaji I don't remember why you ended up not coming to US. Reading some of the letters that I did yesterday, it sounded like you were willing to... Now that Papa is gone and my time is all mine now and wish that he would come back... but it has also made it possible for me to think about you and think about the days gone by... Will you come in my dream again and tell me that you are okay and are waiting for me? That you still love me and that you are not too disappointed in how I turned out? Miss you much Yours Guria.
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 30th June 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji
For so long Papa and Mummy kept me very busy and I wasn't able to think about our lost time much. But now often I think and try to imagine how it must have been for you after we left! How you two suffered! I remember how you looked when I saw you for the first time after returning from Mawana - after the news that we would be going to States. That picture of you is ingrained in my mind. Wish we had 3 more years with you; wish we were there when you really needed us.
Will we see each other again some day?
I hope so...
Love you and Miss you
Your's Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 17th June 2018
Respected Babaji
Wishing you a Happy Father's Day... wherever you are. No matter where you are, you are always close... close to my heart. When we were together, we didn't celebrate all these days. But since I loved you every day of my life, I think that was all that mattered. Thank you for being my Baba... and thank you for making me the 'star' of your eye. I have had the best childhood ever and you made that happen. In my life I will never want for anything since you gave me all in abundance. You will never be lost to me since you are always in my heart... your blood flows through my veins and I love you the best for that. Love you and miss you (and Ammaji). Your's Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 12th June 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji I miss you more every day - now that I have all the time in the World! Papa kept me very busy - always something :-) Now it is all very quiet. I think of the days when you two were there and all was safe and happy. All those books - Chandamama, Parag, Nandan, Dharamyug, Hindustan, Cheeku... and more - you used to buy me. Summer used to be so long and you, books, transistor radio and me and my little space near the window... Seems like a whole another lifetime... a more simple life... Not much missing from my life back then. I had all the love a child could want for and I am thankful for that. I wouldn't trade that for anything in the World. Sometimes when I leave home early in the morning and hear the birds sing, I can almost smell the air from days gone by... and lots of memories - all happy - come dashing in. I do miss those days and you very much. Miss Papa Mummy very much. But I do know that you would not want me to be sad. I will try harder to be happy for what all I was blessed with, for not many have had what I had. Wish you would visit me in my dreams more. I know for many years I haven't talked to you more but you were always in my heart and on my mind. It is, as you know, been very long 25 years of so much illness and unhappiness related to Papa Mummy. I hope you are not too disappointed in me - for I have been selfish - and you would have wanted me to be a better person and would have wanted me to have taken better care of Papa Mummy. I cannot undo anything; cannot go back and do it all over again... how will I even know to do it differently? Wish I was less selfish and better person to be deserving of so much love that you gave me... I am so happy that you gave it so freely and without expecting anything in return. I love you very much; and miss you. Your's Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 28th May 2018
Dear Babaji and Ammaji
I know you can see from wherever you are what a lonely place I am at now. All but Chris are now gone and I hope he will be around to take care of my final ritual. I think of the time when we were together and compare it with now - and I am amazed at where time has gone and how things came to be the way they have turned out. You brought me up with such care and love... Not many kids have the kind of childhood that I have. I am so thankful for having been born in your family and for being the one you loved the best. I would not trade that for anything in the World! Thank you for loving me. Thank you for still looking out for me. Miss you and love you very much Your's Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 13th May 2018
Pujaya Ammaji Aaj Ma ka din hai. Aaj aap hoti to... Kabhi kabhi mein jab subha ko nikalti hoon aur chidiyon ki chahchaahat sunti hoon, mujhai wo din yaad aa jaatai hain jab mein subha board kai imtihaan kai liyai jaati thi aur aap mujhai dahi aur cheeni khila ker bhejti thi... Aisa lagta hai jaise kal ki he baat ho! Aapki bahut yaad aati hai. Aapki beti Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 26th April 2018
In Loving Memory of my Babaji... who gave me all the love a child could ever need. Missing you for 38 years! May you rest in peace. Love - Your's Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 25th April 2018
Dear Babaji -- It is 38 years today since I could no longer find you. It all seems like a dream - a beautiful dream. Thank you for giving me the best childhood ever! You love sustains me still. I was the luckiest one since you loved me best. Those 'phool-ghari' at Diwali that kept coming; those 'samosas' you brought when practicals were running late at St. Thomas; that love that surrounded me even when you were in terrible pain - both physical and emotional. Some times I try to think how unbearable that night would have been for both you and Ammaji when we left for States! What pain you suffered. We missed you very much and cried reading your letters that we used to get - both Mummy and me! I was lucky to have you and to have been born in your family. You gave me everything. Now all four of you are gone and I feel very lost. I know you wouldn't want me to be so sad. Please give me a sign that I will see you again. You and Ammaji - and me... that was a wonderful life! The memories of those years are very special. Somehow I never pictured myself without all four of you; did you? I love you so very much. Missing you -- Your Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 13th April 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji I had a thought I haven't dared to have, I guess, in all this time this afternoon when I was in the bus coming home. I imagined what it may have been like if we returned to India after 4 years of Papa's assignment here. We would have probably been picked up by Mamaji and Mami and brought back to our house in Vijaynagar. I imagined you waiting at the lower level for us to come. I imagined how I would have run out of the car and run to you in your loving embrace. How you would have waited worried that your heart may stop from happiness! What a happy moment that would have been!! Oh, what a loss for not having it! I often think of how you must have spent that night when we came... how your heart must have broken! I can feel that pain - I believe... I don't know why things happen the way they do. Almost 18 years of my life was spent in your loving care. Who would have thought that we would separate like this? I miss those days, months, years lost... Miss you very much Your Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 21st February 2018
Dear Babaji Ammaji Anju and I talk about you some times. She still remembers Ammaji's smile, mathris and how she used to be so happy to see her when she came for a visit after we had left. It is so nice to be able to talk about you with someone - now that both Papa and Mummy are with you. It feels so strange to have been left alone. Somehow I never thought of this day. I miss you every day. There is never a day when I don't think about you. Love you Your's Gudiya.
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 28th January 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji Did you know last month that Papa was coming to be with you in less than 24 hours? I did not. If only I knew... Will I see you again some day? Please give me a sign... Love you and Miss you. Your's Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 10th January 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji Aaj Papa ki Tehravi hai. Where has time gone? We were together once, happy and healthy - as if in another lifetime! And yet, it is all so fresh in my mind like yesterday... Missing you. Missing all of you very much. Your's Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 8th January 2018
Dear Babaji, Ammaji Did Papa give you my letter? I miss you... miss all four of you. Please always be near me and stay with me. Love you Your's Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 29th December 2017
Dear Babaji Ammaji Take care of your son now that he is with you. Love you Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 27th November 2017
Dear Babaji and Ammaji I miss you more today... I miss you always. It is yours and my day. I hope you are looking down on me from above and know how I wish I could have one more day with you. Love you always. Yours Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 26th September 2017
Happy 119th Birthday, Babaji! I miss you and Ammaji so very much. Love, Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 14th May 2017
Dear Ammaji Happy Mother's Day! I see your face still just as clearly as ever. I can still feel the softness of your arms. I do miss you - miss you a whole lot. Thank you for being my Ammaji. Aapki Bahut Yaad Aati hai... Woh Chhitthiyan... Love you and Miss you. Yours Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 26th April 2017
Respected Babaji You were the most important person in my life and I am afraid I have not always remembered this day. I cannot explain it to myself how and why. I didn't think I could live a day without you and now it has been 37 long years! I can only hope that you, Ammaji and Mummy are together now and are happy wherever you are. I hope some day to see you again if such a thing is possible. For now, I am just very glad that you were my Babaji and that I had your love. Love you and Miss you very much. Your's Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 27th November 2016
Respected Babaji and Ammaji Missing my 'dehi with cheeni' today. Missing you even more. May be I will see you in my dream tonight. Lots of love Your Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 26th September 2016
Happy 118th Birthday, Babaji! Love you and miss you Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 25th September 2016
Dear Babaji, Ammaji Wish you were here... Love and Miss you. Yours, Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 29th July 2016
You were once my one companion You were all that mattered You were once a friend and grand parents Then my world was shattered Wishing you were somehow here again Wishing you were somehow near Sometimes it seemed if I just dreamed Somehow you would be here Wishing I could hear your voice again Knowing that I never would Dreaming of you won't help me to do All that you dreamed I could Passing bells and sculpted angels Cold and monumental Seem for you the wrong companions You were warm and gentle Too many years fighting back tears Why can't the past just die? Wishing you were somehow here again Knowing we must say goodbye Try to forgive, teach me to live Give me the strength to try
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 13th July 2016
My Dear Ammaji I have been thinking a lot about you; and missing you. Wonder if you can know this... I can still feel the soft touch of your arms and I miss the days when you used to hold my hand and walk real fast when we went visiting with Birbal Babaji. I hope you and Babaji are together with Mummy now. I miss you. Love you, Yours' Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 15th May 2016
Bhawgan tumhare Mandir mein, main pooja kernai ko aayee. Pooja ki Widhi nehi janti, apna dil lai ker aayee. -- Ammaji, aap mujhai yeh kavita sikhati thi. Abhi mujhai yaad hai ki hum dono khaat per baithai thai varandai mein - 6 number wali guli kai makaan mein. I miss you so much. Love, Yours, Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 8th May 2016
Happy Mother's Day Ammaji. Today I closed my eyes and pictured your face and I could see you as if it was only yesterday we were together. They say that if you really love someone, you can picture their face exactly as it was. I saw the picture of you and babaji the other day and suddenly I could smell the air as it was in those days sitting in front of the window in Thapurnagar house. So I know you and babaji - and Mummy will always be somewhere close even though I cannot see you. Aapki bahut yaad aati hai! Aapki Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 26th April 2016
Dear Babaji I can still see your face and hear you voice as if it was yesterday. I miss you every day; but today 36 years ago... I hesitate to say that we lost you or that you went away or that you passed away because you are still in my heart and always will be. You will never be gone until I breathe. I miss not seeing you; not being able to call you. The other day I looked at a picture of you and ammaji sitting in the front part of the house in ThaparNagur and I thought I could smell the air for a moment. To me that's a sign that you (and ammaji and mummy - all who loved me) are somewhere in essence. I love you and miss you - especially on this day. Yours Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 1st January 2016
Dear Babaji, Ammaji Wish I could wish you a very Happy New Year. If you are somewhere, may be you can see me and know how much I am missing you. You will always live on in my heart. Love you - Yours, Gudiya
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 27th November 2015
Dear Babaji & Ammaji Aaj aap dono nai mujhe dahi-cheeni khilai hoti. Can you give me a sign that you are somewhere waiting for me? Love you and miss you Yours - Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 11th November 2015
Happy Diwali, Babaji, Ammaji. Ammaji, I miss making wall paintings with you on Diwali using the red brick ink. All that food that you and Mummy cooked on holidays. So long ago and yet so close to my heart that I can see it fresh like yesterday. Bahut yaad aati hai. Where are my 'patakhai', babaji? You used to have never-ending supply. Love and miss you. Yours, Gudia
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 31st October 2015
March 19, 2019
Dear Babaji
It has been 14,206 days (38 years, 10 months and 21 days) since I could reach out to you. So long and yet it feels like yesterday. I miss both you and ammaji so much. I hope you are somewhere and that mummy is with you now. So much has changed; you loved me so much and worried about me so but now all that seems to be gone. You are in my heart and I can always feel you near me; especially when I am sad or when something happy comes along. I wish we had more time together; I wish you didn't suffer so much. Ammaji's suffering was unimaginable. I wasn't there for either of you. I know this is the way life is but... Love you and miss you. Yours Gudia
Posted by Chhavi & Maitrie Bansal on 28th September 2015
Respected bade baba ji, Happy 117th Birthday, Babaji. We miss you very much. Chhavi and Maitrie
Posted by Sandhia McLeod on 26th September 2015
Happy 117th Birthday, Babaji. We miss you very much. Love, Your's Gudia

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