ForeverMissed
Large image
This memorial website was created in loving memory of our beloved matriarch, Elfreda Sackey, born on March 9, 1938 and dearly departed on January 13, 2022 at 83 years old. She was the light of our family and she deeply touched the lives of many across the diaspora. In celebration of her life, we invite you to share warm memories, photos, and videos of our special angel. She will be missed but never forgotten!

The matriarch, the torch carrier
The leader of the family
Who moves all barriers
The one appointed by God
To lead us through
The one who has paved
The way for me and you.
Has now been called home
To be with our Savior
Let not a heart be heavy
Or a soul be wavered
Her time has been well served
And her work is finally done
Blessed are those that sit
With the Father and Son.
She's touched our lives
In so many different ways
That her memory will live on
For the rest of our days.
Reflecting recollections bring
Smiles to everyone's face
I'm sure there are others like her
But no one can take her place.
From the twinkle in her eyes
To the smile on her face
We'll never forget the beautiful
Soul of our matriarch, Mrs. Elfreda C. Sackey (“Mama”)

~Author - Juanita J Smalls




March 9
March 9
Mama as we calibrate our birthday today, we pray that you are watching over us and interceding on our behalf, we missed you very much, but God loves you more, Happy Birthday Mama
March 9, 2023
March 9, 2023
Happy heavenly birthday my dear mother I am alway thinking about you thank for making me the person I am today love you alway your son Aloysius
March 9, 2022
March 9, 2022
Beautiful rise family! Today is as equally difficult as Jan 13 and Jan 29, but the difference is time. Since then, we've gained healing, peace, comfort and strength. I knew today would be difficult but I'm leaning on all of the things we've gained since our beloved angel transitioned. Mama the truth is, as selfish as I would like to be to wish you were here with us to celebrate your birthday, we really dont know how you would've felt today. Especially knowing you would have spent the better part of your day at dialysis. As much as I want to say I don't care, that I just want to hear your voice and touch you on your special day, the truth is you are where you want to be and most importantly you are with who you want to be with, you beloved husband. We really dont know whether you would be in the mood physically, mentally or emotionally to celebrate. It is no denying that despite how you may have felt, most likely you would have tough it out for us. You would have fought as you always did to make us happy by being happy. But today we will fight the pain of not having you here and say mama, it's ok, rest on your special day. Close your eyes, relax your body and have sweet thoughts without any worries. Through time we'll continue to search for healing and comfort so we can continue to carry your legacy by our decisions and actions. We love you with every breath as you are the reason for our existence. Happy Birthday my Queen !
March 9, 2022
March 9, 2022
As we celebrate your birthday today, we ask God to give us strength and courage to continue your Legacy, we missed you very much Mama and we know that you are in a better place. We pray that you wash over us as you always did, your absence have left a empty space in our hearts that can never be refilled, we missed your presents . You was always there when we needed you. As you look down on us today we pray that you intercede on our behalf as you always did. You are the best Mother ever, we want to take this time to appreciate the sacrifices that you made to make us better people in society, the care and the love that you show us will never be forgotten. Happy Birthday Mama we love and missed you very much.
January 29, 2022
January 29, 2022
“If I plant you, you will grow?”

Thank you, Ms. Freda, our collective Sweet Mother, for not only planting but nurturing our seeds.

Yes, we’ve grown. Our roots are firm, just like yours. Our branches are extended, just like yours. Our flowers are merry and full of color, just like yours.

With gratitude,
Marica
January 27, 2022
January 27, 2022
Eternal Energy

Never in a million years did I think you would transition to become my ancestor. Yet this undeniable fact became a reality for me on Jan 13, 2022. Despite your declining health, I wasn’t prepared for your exit from this world. I never once associated you and the word “ancestor”; never even considered your mortality for that matter. Death and you were never conceived.

I always knew you were my source and foundation. You were my core, my anchor, my roots…my beginning. Therefore, I never saw life without you or worse, you without life. But on Jan 13, my worst fear became a reality as I held your lifeless body in my arms. On that day, I was forced to experience something I wasn’t prepared for or ever imagined was possible – you without life, life without you. For the first time in my life I would come to understand the lyrics “nothing is permanent in life, all except for change.” (by Stephen Marley – Song “Now I know” – Album “Revelation The Root of Life part 1”) Can’t help but to smile at the irony.

Jan 13 marked the day my life permanently changed. I was left with so many questions but very few answers. How do I accept and embrace this change? How do I navigate forward through the effects of this change? What does this change look like? What will tomorrow be like without you? The list of questions seemed endless. As the questions continued to grow and my attempt to sort through and find answers rendered useless, one word stood out. Energy! Your Energy. This word alone was the answer to the laundry list of questions cumulated in my mind. Everything I knew you as was present in your energy. 

Your energy lives within me, therefore I still had you with me. More importantly, now that you are my ancestor, your energy is more powerful than ever. As your energy traverses, I can truly feel you in both realms. Your energy is Eternal. And you are my Eternal Energy.

Rest in Perfect Peace my Beautiful and Loving Grandmother (“Mama”)

~A Broken but Healing Heart – your Beloved Grandson Mel
January 22, 2022
January 22, 2022
We knew her as “Sister Freda” although she was our aunt. She was very much a part of our growing up – countless visits and too many memories to recount. We will always remember Sister Freda’s laugh , smile and warm embrace. On hindsight, they were her signature greeting. She was a blessing to her family - the children, Uncle Phillip and OMG Melford! This love was surely extended to her other grandkids that came later on. 

An amazing woman! A thoughtful woman! A strong woman! A loving aunt!

Heaven is Paradise and the Perfect place to be.  So, Sister Freda, enter Paradise on the wings of angels. May your soul and that of the other departed souls Rest in God’s Eternal Peace.

Nancy on behalf of the nieces & nephews
January 19, 2022
January 19, 2022
      Tribute to my Grandmother Mrs. Elfreda Cooper Sackey aka (Sweet Mother)

I like to dedicate this moment to my grandmother, Mrs. Elfreda Cooper Sackey. I feel truly honored and blessed to have had such a strong, loving, caring, incredible and selfless soul as a grandmother. I am grateful that as a result of your hard work and the love of your family, I have a life of my own in this world.

In remembering your life, I embrace the beautiful life you shared with the love of your life, my beloved grandfather Mr. Philip J. Sackey Sr. It is painful and devastating to the entire family knowing that you both are no longer with us. However, whenever we’re called by God there’s nothing that can prevent our appointed time. My grandmother may not be with us physically, but I know she’s in heaven watching over us in spirit. I’m weeping as I write this tribute, but I’m happy she is no longer in pain and suffering. I love you Grandma, may your soul Rest In Perfect Peace!
January 19, 2022
January 19, 2022
Memories of A Little Boy

What is life? In its raw form, life is represented by numbers. It is time measured in hours, minutes, and seconds. It is also characterized by other measurements, such as weight, height, inches, volume, and dimension. These numbers vary throughout life and can give us a basic sense of time, but the actions and events that occur during the time represented by these numbers are what define legacy and impact. My grandmother left an incredible legacy filled with tremendous impact during her 83 years, 10 months and 4 days. Her legacy and impact both cannot be assessed by possessions or wealth. I stand before you today as evidence of her legacy and impact. My grandmother was a rare soul – a Divine spirit. She was my Light, my Lineage, and my FOREVER!

As I reflect on her legacy and impact, I can’t help but remember that she was my FIRST for many things in life and my memory of these firsts set the cornerstone for my character and the values I hold today. My grandmother may not have been my first sight coming into this world, but she definitely was my FIRST memory. My FIRST memory of beauty, love, strength, and compassion came from my grandmother. My FIRST memory of emotional expression and the desire to be loved, feel loved, and give love was through her. My FIRST memory of fashion and presentation was that of my grandmother. She was an accomplished seamstress and created the most stunning African outfits. My FIRST memory of a Goddess was of my grandmother.

My grandmother was my FIRST memory of family, a family that consists of both extended and immediate members without distinction along those lines. She was my FIRST memory of structure, discipline, hard work, and perseverance. She was also my FIRST memory of confidence and boldness, as well as my FIRST memory of duality because she was simple yet complicated. My grandmother was my FIRST memory of the difference between happiness and joy. I mean uncompromised joy. She remained joyful despite life’s perils and regardless of financial, environmental, and social circumstances. In fact, this was the secret of our bond and connection. My grandmother was also my FIRST memory of both pain and hurt. My FIRST memory of a woman’s sorrow was of hers. My FIRST memory of retaliation and revenge was on her behalf.

As I continue through my wave of memories, my grandmother was my FIRST memory of the concept of entrepreneurship and of a businesswoman. She did whatever it took to provide for her family whether she was cleaning corporate offices and buildings, caring for young children and adults, or owning small businesses or “shops” as it is called in Liberia. She was innovative at creating multiple income streams. On any given day you could be sure to visit her home and find yourself purchasing one or more items from her “shop”. Whether it was an assortment of candy, which included condensed milk candy and bubble gums or “chiklet” as it is referred to in Liberian colloquial or any variety of soda or “soft drink” (another colloquialism), you could rest assured it was available for sale. You could also find your favorite alcoholic beverage of a cold bottle of “club beer” or ginger beer, even Heineken and Guinness. I’d be remiss not to mention palm wine, which like “club beer” and ginger beer is an alcoholic beverage native to her homeland and several regions across the diaspora.

At her shop (also referred to as “coe bo shop”) you could also treat yourself to some of her favorite African cuisine, such as fufu and soup, cassava leaf, palm butter, torborgee, and fried fish and rice just to name a few. And yes, there were also her famous donuts and pastries such as rice bread, hot and delicious buttermilk cornbread, short bread, kala, and even plantain chips.

My grandmother never referred to her shop as a restaurant because it was more of a home. In addition to good food and drinks, she would also entertain you with music, games, and great conversation. Her idea was to create an atmosphere where all patrons felt like family; a space filled with positive energy, where you felt safe and knew you would have a good time, leaving life’s obstacles behind for a few hours.

As I close, my grandmother was my FIRST memory of Me and my FIRST memory of life was of Her! Although she is gone, I know she is with me today, tomorrow, and forever. To my beloved Mama, I love you to the highest heights and deepest depths. May your energy travel for Eternity!

~A Broken Heart – Your Grandson Melford.
January 16, 2022
January 16, 2022
When death has come and taken our love ones it leaves so lonely and depressed, as believers, we have the blessed assurance to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord. She has gone home to be with her Savior where there will be no more pains. He promised he was going to prepare a mansion for us, her space was ready and she had to go. To the family greave, but greave with hope there is promise a great getting up morning when all the dead in Christ shall rise and we shall be caught up to meet him, where there will be a great reunion at the banquet table. She has met the love of her life, Philip Sackey.
May the life she lived continues to shine and may the memories shared resonate in your hearts.
Rest In Peace.
January 16, 2022
January 16, 2022
Old mom, Although you can't be here with me
we're truly not apart. You will live in my heart forever.. Love you !

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Recent Tributes
March 9
March 9
Mama as we calibrate our birthday today, we pray that you are watching over us and interceding on our behalf, we missed you very much, but God loves you more, Happy Birthday Mama
March 9, 2023
March 9, 2023
Happy heavenly birthday my dear mother I am alway thinking about you thank for making me the person I am today love you alway your son Aloysius
March 9, 2022
March 9, 2022
Beautiful rise family! Today is as equally difficult as Jan 13 and Jan 29, but the difference is time. Since then, we've gained healing, peace, comfort and strength. I knew today would be difficult but I'm leaning on all of the things we've gained since our beloved angel transitioned. Mama the truth is, as selfish as I would like to be to wish you were here with us to celebrate your birthday, we really dont know how you would've felt today. Especially knowing you would have spent the better part of your day at dialysis. As much as I want to say I don't care, that I just want to hear your voice and touch you on your special day, the truth is you are where you want to be and most importantly you are with who you want to be with, you beloved husband. We really dont know whether you would be in the mood physically, mentally or emotionally to celebrate. It is no denying that despite how you may have felt, most likely you would have tough it out for us. You would have fought as you always did to make us happy by being happy. But today we will fight the pain of not having you here and say mama, it's ok, rest on your special day. Close your eyes, relax your body and have sweet thoughts without any worries. Through time we'll continue to search for healing and comfort so we can continue to carry your legacy by our decisions and actions. We love you with every breath as you are the reason for our existence. Happy Birthday my Queen !
Her Life

Her interests & favorites

January 15, 2022
  1. Great seamstress.  Sewing was a pastime hobby.
  2. Devoted to Church of Christ
  3. Loved dancing and playing music; all types of music but African and Gospel were her favorite.
  4. One of her favorite sayings: "If I plant you, you will grow?!"
  5. Favorite alcoholic beverage: Guinness 
  6. Favorite soft drink: Coke (Coco-Cola)
  7. Food: home cook African food, but definitely Fufu and soup all day! 
Recent stories
March 9, 2023
Mama,Happy Birthday old girl, forever love. Missed you on this day. Always remembering some of the fun things we did like having a glass of wine together. I remembered the other day when you had asked me, "Win while don't you come in the morning to get me up again ". I told you my hours had changed on my job. Missed you so much mama. Love you forever and my your soul rest in perfect peace. Keep watching over us.

Not Just Another Sunday

January 23, 2022
Woke up this morning with the spirit of gratitude. Meditated and thanked the Divine for strength and peace as I navigated through my emotions. It has been one week and three days since my beloved grandmother received her wings and took her flight to the heavens.

Mama, the last time you and I went to church together was Dec 12, 2021. You felt happy; we had lots of fun, even took you to get a manicure which you loved. You chose your own color, burgundy. It was a beautiful day.

My last day with you on this earth was Thursday, Jan 6, one week before your appointed trip to the heavens. You were extremely happy to see me that morning. I remember you said, “Mel is that you? You da one gonna be here wit me today?” I replied, yes mama. And you said, “oh good, I’m so happy to see you.” You gave me you signature hug and kiss but only this time, it was a little longer and a little harder. I was delighted to see how happy you were. You directed me on how to prepare your coffee and eggs. You told me how much sugar and cream to add, as well as where to find the salt and black pepper. You were very alert and energetic the entire day, the most I’ve seen you in a while. I felt good and I was reassured my grandma was still strong.

Since I didn’t get a chance to take you to church on Jan 9th as you requested during my last visit with you, I decided to visit your church today and worship with the congregation as we often do. For the next two hours I felt like I could recreate and relive our Sunday routines. Attempting to relive Dec 12th, while driving I played our usual gospel music as if you were sitting next to me in the passenger seat on our way to service. As I listened to “Something About the Name Jesus” performed by The Rance Allen Group featuring Kirk Franklin, I imagined touching your hands and seeing you smile as we both enjoyed the beautiful words to the song together. I imagined seeing the light in your face as you drifted off into deep thoughts. Looking back, I always wondered what you were thinking about. I would often think, if I only knew her thoughts…

Arriving to church this morning was surreal. It was difficult to say the least. I played every course of events between you and I. First, I parked in the same space we park every Sunday. Exiting the car, I imagined putting you in your wheelchair and strolling you across the parking lot into the sanctuary. I sat in the exact seat you and I would sit, and I immediately felt your presence. As the congregants began to sing the hymns, I could see you singing and humming along while making up your own words but still keeping the melody. Through my tears, this moment brought a smile to my face. Lol I felt you… you were with me. As I tried to relive our moments, everything was pronounced and amplified to the next level. Every sound, every image seemed louder and brighter. My senses were heightened because although I couldn’t see or hear you physically, you were with me spiritually. Not in a celestial sense but more tangible. It’s hard to explain…today was definitely not just another Sunday.



Weekend in mama's apartment, after dinner she and I would have a glass of wine but before I could L

January 16, 2022
Mama and I would always have our glasses of wine because I love having it with her. Mama used to tell me some funny stories about Philip J. Sackey. I would some music on my phone for her and she would in chair. I believe it was her time because she always said that she was tired. The book of Isaiah 6:8 says Whom shall I send, and who will gofor us?Then said I,  Here am I;send me" Mama is gone to prepare a place for us. We love ❤️ Mama, sweet dreams till we meet .

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