10 Years...

I always wondered if it would feel better with time. I think you’d be happy to know that it does. Of course I still miss you, but with each passing year I am able to reflect more on your life and your wisdom, and that allows me to feel like you are still here with me. 

I know your spirit is with the boys every day and that you’re smiling with pride at the young men they’ve become. 

Thank you for all of the ✨signs✨ you keep sending me to remind me you’re right by my side. 

I love you forever ♥️

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! 70 YEARS!
I wish you were here today so we could have a huge celebration!!! We would try to cook for you but I know you would want to do it yourself.  At least the cake.  I'm picturing the one you made for Opa on his 70th with the martzipan rose that you spend hours creating.  You were so proud of it and he was beaming with joy that you did that for him.  I'll go pick up some Irises today and light a candle for you.  I still think about you several times a day.  Sometimes dozens.  I'm so sorry I took you for granted.  I wish I knew then what I know now.  It's strange, I feel like I'm getting to know you better now that you are gone.  I'm actually appreciating and understanding things that used to upset or confuse me.  Thank you for that gift.  It is teaching me how to better appreciate the people I love.
I'll give the boys a kiss for you.  I love you so much.  Forever and ever!!!

2 YEARS
Hi Mom.  It has been two years since you passed away.  Wow.  Two years.  It seems like yesterday and also forever ago.  Although this was the worst day of my life, I don't want to remember it that way.  I know you wouldn't want me to be sad today--or any day for that matter.  So instead, I am going to use the date of March 8th to remember all of the beautiful, amazing family and friends who surrounded me with love and comfort.  People brought me flowers, dinners and thoughtful cards.  I received phone calls from my friends and yours that I hadn't heard from in over 20 years!  People you worked with 30 years ago called to let me know they still thought of you and remembered your kind heart and warm hugs.  Everyone shared such wonderful memories of you.  Even the principal of the boys' school showed up on my doorstep with a meal he cooked for our whole family.  My world was ripped apart that day, but it was instantly filled with grace and love.  I have to hold on to and remember these moments.  If I think about what I lost, it's unbearable.  If I reflect on all of the amazing people in my life who showed up when I needed it most, I can get through days like today.  
I love you so much and I think about you every day.  

THE HOLIDAYS
It is now November and the holidays are upon us.  It was so difficult last year to sit at the Thanksgiving table without you.  It didn't even seem like it was Thanksgiving, but just some weird Thursday that no longer made any sense.  I had your last jar of Cranberry sauce that had been sitting in my fridge for this special night.  I couldn't even bring myself to try it.  I knew it was the last one and if I had some, I would solidify that.  I just stared at the bowl.  I wondered what you were doing when you were cooking it and what songs were playing in the background.  I wondered what other dishes lined the counters in your kitchen as you hummed along to your music and cooked for hours with love in every stir, whip, and addition.  So, what do I do now.  I try to make your sauces, and cookies but they simply don't compare.  They're good enough, after all, you DID teach me a few things, but they lack that spirit that went along with it.  Your giddy smile as you handed us your wonderful creations - eager to know what we thought.  Your attention to what each of us wanted in our persimmon cookies - some with nuts, some with raisins, and some with both (or for my boys...neither!).  You cared about everyone and everything.  It wasn't just food you handed us, but an offering of your soul.  Every bite told us who you were, what mattered to you and how much you loved.  
I will get through these next couple of months because of those memories.  We'll make some of your recipees and remember you.  And luckily, I saved one last bit of your cranberry sauce in my freezer.  And if I'm brave enough, I may have it with my meal one last time.
I love you always and forever.
Andrea


Happy Birthday Mama!
Today you would be 69.  I wish I could make you dinner tonight.  Instead, dad is coming over and we will all have a toast to you.
 I made Baklava.  Not EVEN as good as yours ;-)  
I've been thinking a lot about your life, and how it started.  You really had it rough from the very beginning.  I'm now finally starting to realize and understand your true strength and how you persevered - even triumphed!  I wish I could have told you how much I admired you.  I'm only now becoming aware as I'm able to reflect on who you really were as a person, and not just my mom.  The only comfort I get in your passing is knowing that you are finally at ease.  The rest and peace you so deserved.  Thank you for being my mom.  You were always there for me, no matter what.  Unconditional.  I've heard that word a million times but you taught me what it really means.
 I miss you so much!!!!
Forever your grateful daughter, Drea. 





One Year...
I cannot believe it has been one year.  I think about you many times, each and every day.  I feel like you are always with me though.  The other night I wore your earrings.  Yesterday I cooked from a pan of yours.  This morning I made a smoothie in your cherished Vitamix blender.  Also, every night outside my bedroom window, a frog croaks for a few minutes.  I like to think it's you wishing me sweet dreams or "schlaf gut" as you used to always say.  (By the way, Sonja and I can't figure out why you loved frogs so much!  Why did you???).  I bought some Irises today- your favorites- and put them all around the house.  I guess these little things help me feel like you are still here.  It helps a little. 
But still, l would do anything for a hug.
I love you forever.....
~Drea

 

 

Elke Landis passed away due to an embolism on March 8, 2011, in her

home in Santa Cruz. Born Elke Niklausen in Stuttgart, Germany, on

August 24, 1943, she came to San Francisco in her early twenties after

an ambitious journey around the world with two girlfriends. She married

Kit Landis in 1971 and moved first to Ben Lomond, where her two

daughters, Andrea and Sonja, were born, and later moved to Santa

Cruz.


A skilled homemaker and hard-working single mother, Elke held many jobs over the years to support her family. She was office manager for the Santa Cruz Veterinary Hospital and bookkeeper for many businesses, including most recently Fitz Fresh in Watsonville. Cooking was her greatest passion, and her mastery of classic French cuisine earned her a position as head chef at the Shadowbrook restaurant in the early 1980s. In 1989, she opened Elke’s Express Cuisine, offering gourmet lunches and dinners to go.




A true nurturer, Elke loved animals and surrounded herself with dogs, cats and, once, even a land otter. She grew her own vegetables, herbs and flowers and filled her home with a multitude of plants as well as a collection of anything to do with frogs. Above all, she nurtured her children and grandchildren with generosity and affection and loved nothing more than gathering friends and family to share her wonderful food and hospitality, elevating even the smallest occasion into a celebration.




A woman with a big heart, Elke loved unconditionally and never hesitated to help or listen to others, always putting their needs above her own. She is survived by daughters Andrea and Sonja, grandsons Tre and Jace Hultzen, and several nieces and nephews in Germany.




If the measure of a person’s life is indeed how he or she leaves others feeling, Elke lived a life on the highest plane. Her kindness and unselfish goodness will be missed by all whose lives she touched. A celebration of Elke’s life will be held on Sunday, March 20th, at the Elks Lodge from 2-4pm