After church, Sue, Paul and me went to the cemetery. It started to snow before church was over...The temps were nice and the snow was beautiful. We added a few things for you. It looks very pretty and I know you are happy.  Eric, there is just a great need in me to go to the cemetery,,,I know you are not there, however, it is the last place I saw you, my precious son. I love and miss you so very much...I love Will Nelsons new song that includes the song about death.  Death is something you get over, it is somethin g you just go thru......so very true. And i hope no one keeps asking me is I am ok...I AM NOT NOR WILL I EVER BE OK......thanks for the memories my dear son.....

oh Eric, how I miss you! I wake up thinking this can't be true ! My heart is broken

Eric, your life was cut way too short. You had so much to live for and to do. You had 2 boys your loved selflessly and those 2 little grandboys that you gave your heart too. Your MOM, I miss you more than I can even say. You were always so grateful to dad and I that we adopted you and gave us credit for the man you . You told me how much I meant to you as your mom. It was such precious words and I so wish I had recorded to just to hear you say it over and over. I know those words came from the very, very bottom of your sweet, precious heart. Most of telephone talks were so uplifting and heartfelt. And I so loved when I would see you, you would hug me so tight. Eric, you were so proud of me and I was as proud of you.

I am not good at remembering specific dates. I so remember when you and your family drove away from Oak Grove heading for New York and then on to Germany. It was hard to say bye. As I went up the steps, i saw your car go by and i just fell down in tears.. You saw me and told me layer you almost turned   around....I must say I am really happy you did not.....It would of been just so much harder.

On this day all those years ago, we brought home a 15 month, big brown eyed sweet little guy.

You were the only one of our kids adopted in ND that ever had a baby shower. My friend, Rita Johnson had it for you (and me).It was such a great time and you were the center of attention, which you really loved....You got lots of nice clothes, which was so nice. You only came home with the clothes you were wearing. I have pictures of the evening tucked away some where. I can see you sitting in a high chair just beaming. Your big brown eyes just sparkling.

As  side note: I just received word yesterday that Rita Johnson died of cancer. We moved and they moved and we lost track of each other. However, I will never forget her kind heart towards you.

Eric you and Marlayna had a special kind of brother-sister relationship.You were both so silly and beware!!!! if either of you got a video camera in hand. You would both run around the house in and out, videoing and making all kinds of stuff up as you went. Nay was so sad when she discovered some of the vidoes had been copied over. You would make her laugh and were part of the "tribe" that would work with her in those first years. She needed lots of work and attention and believe me you were right there with the rest of us. I remember one time, you were an "adult" you and Nay running around the house like crazy videoing..Such fun. I hope she never forgets all that fun.

Here we are....going into another year!     --8 degrees can't remember when it was this "chilly"!  Of course, thoughts go back to my son and wonder what this year would of held for him. His past would be over free of the burden of "the black widow" free to be the real Eric. The weather is breaking COLD records...People complain about the COLD...and in North Dakota places have been up or down to MINUS 54 Degrees...Here they freeze and complain about MINUS 5..It is winter...Oh Eric I miss you so much.

As we are preparing to move from one year to the next, I just know that the year 2017 is imprinted deeply in my mind. March 30, 2017 Thru memories lens I will forever have that date deeply sealed in my heart. I talked to your brother, Christopher. He said he has 2 regrets: That he did not call Dad and you on the phone! He said he tells his 2 sons some of the shenanigans he , your brother Curtis you used to do . He said his boys really respect ME.......

Well, 2018 and here I am.....Missing you so much, just way too much. I know you are not into sports much, however, your dad would be happy, the Vikings are playing in the playoffs. Of course we are cheering for the Vikings. Matthew is an AVID Viking fan.

I don't remember much about your army time. Eric was in the army for 10 years. He was a dedicated soldier. He served one tour in Haiti and 2 tours in Bosnia-Herzegovina  for peacekeeping. When you went to Ft. Leonard Wood Mo. for basic training. Lena and the babies stayed in Santa Maria, Ca. Lena, the boys and me took a plane to Wichita, we went to Winfield and then a friend rented a car and we drove to the army base for your graduation. I was so very, very proud to see you, my son, Eric O. Olson in his army uniform.  Ft. Leon wood was a very beautiful place in the Mark Twain forest in south-eastern part of Missouri. The ceremony was beautiful and did not last too long. I was so proud of you. We spent the night and then I headed back to Wichita to fly home.  You were stationed in Germany and I had not heard from you for a long time. I researched and found your head man and emailed him.....You told me later, you were called into the office and told in no uncertain terms to CALL YOUR MOTHER...You reminded me of that many times over. We went one time to Watertown, NY to see you and the boys on base. I can remember crossing the BLACK River or some such name and you said it was really an ugly body of water. You were a single daddy by then. You had your apartment to nice, Kitchen decorated with that Ivy print curtains, dishes etc. Brandon was mad at me because you left him and Andrew in the car when he went into a store. Brandon asked me when i was going home and I said, "I think I will spend the winter", Brandon was not very happy  :(  such silly boys you have. We had only a few short days but loved every minute of it with you and the boys.  I visited you few times when you were in FT, Benning, Georgia. One time we stayed for a week when you were to go on a week camp thing. However, you hurt your leg so could not go, but we still stayed so you could have some freedom. You told me the boys get up early so they can play games before school..Well, this grama had different ideas and not early morning games.....Homework before any games at night. You really were a very easy dad....However, you loved those boys more than your own life.   As I came across the street to your place, 2 little boys came across the street with a box for me. Some cow stuff they had bought at garage sale for me....SO SWEET

. Christmas is over for this year. Even tho we were not together much on holidays these past years, I miss you so much. There was always that phone call, whether Christmas day or 3 days later, I always loved to hear your voice. The memories of past holidays just hurts now. Such excitement and fun. We opened presents on Christmas Eve would eat, go to church at 7PM come home and open presents and back to a beautiful candlelight service at 11PM. What memories I have right now. 1978 . You kids once again put on a sweet nativity for Dad and me. This year Matthew was the baby Jesus. And now you are looking down from heaven, everyone else is all grown and out on their own with families. I do not know why time has to go so fast? And there is never a chance to go back even for a minute. So in memories lens, I see a bunch of little kids being so serious being the angel, Mary, Joseph, Shepherds and singing. And I can barely see what I type thru the tears that just come even if it is out of my character. And now we have the New Year to go into. We did get snow this Christmas which made things nice and white and pretty. It is also cold now. I wish I could just talk to you about all of this stuff. Only  a few more days until this year is gone. How can it be 9 months since that terrible day in the hospital when I heard code blue and I did not know what that was. It only took a minute, and I realized.....You were in heaven...You lived such a good life. You were so happy about everything and so positive. Even in those dark days with the "black widow" you found something to be happy about. 

Eric worked at various jobs growing up. January 28, 1992, was one of the 2 happiest days in his life. Andrew Scott was born in January and Brandon Tyler was born February 18,1993. Eric joined the US Army and served 10 years,. Eric was a  single dad at this time and gave his boys a wonderful life. Until the day he died, he had a very special relationship with his boys. Another very exciting time in my sons life was when he became a "grandpa" for the first and second time. Elijah Scott and Micah Tyler were the joys of Eric's life. At this time Eric was manager of a Rent-a-Center in Jefferson City, MO. Eric was very well known by so many in Jeff City. The boys received a call when they were planning their dad's funeral from the owner of the home. He gave the boys  very great discount. He knew Eric and thought very highly of him, which was everyone's feeling for my son. Eric loved to draw and at one time he had tattoo stuff and did tattoos for other people. However, was way too good and would tell they could pay later and for the most part "later" never came. He never complained. He loved to do it and many benefitted. 

Eric was born November 19,1970. He was adopted by Sherman and Judi Olson, March 7th, 1972. Eric was quite character as a little guy. He found ways to get "into, on top of. underneath, and inside of" ANYTHING.  We had a lady with us when we went to Fargo to get our new little boy. Suzi was not wanting to share me. Rosemary offered to hold Eric in the back seat. It was fine and then she said "oh oh I feel some warmth in my lap". Oh Oh Eric had peed thru his clothes. She just laughed......His beautiful brown eyes just sparkled with love, mischievous and satisfaction. The first night home, Eric found his silliness would make all of us crumble in laughter and he loved it. Eating spaghetti, wasn't quite funny enough, so he put the whole bowl of spaghetti on his head, Eric got the attention he wanted...Eric was a very loving and giving child and as he grew, he would so often "pay-it-forward" in small ways and in much bigger ways. He loved to go shopping with me, and as I waited in a dressing room, he would bring me things to try on. He had good taste in clothes for me. Eric worked very hard at everything he did. So hard that he once put his arm thru  window (the scars are still there)and injured his arm very bad he had  a job washing windows..  He was the one who got his finger caught in  glass sliding door. He was the one who fell off a ladder and had stitches in his head, My son was often, "an accident waiting to happen"....Oh how I love my son. Eric was not much into sports. He did play soccer one year, however he was much more interested in kicking the dirt and watching the birds over head. When the game was over, "Hey coach, did we win'! MY BOY...

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