WORDS SPOKEN AT THE FUNERAL

BY ANTHONY CAMPITELLI, FRED’S ELDEST SON

I welcome all of you here today, not just to morn the life of an amazing man, but to celebrate it with family and friends.  This will be one of the saddest days of my life, but I know that I will find comfort simply from the smile that my dad inspires in us all.  My dad had a very strong faith that guided every step of his life, a faith that influenced all that he did.  He upheld the utmost respect for his roots in Catholicism.  He honoured his parents and was proud of his upbringing.  At a very young age, Dad followed his own calling, to play a significant part in his faith, by becoming an altar boy. It was at this time, that he developed a true appreciation of the sharing of the blood of Christ.  After meeting my mother, dad was excited by the idea of raising a family according to Christian values.  We were blessed that my mom too, led a Christian life, so it was not difficult for her to honour my dad’s request to convert to Catholicism.  All of his children have fond memories of, and have been inspired by, dad’s commitment to attending Sunday mass.  Dad not only took the duty of taking his children to church on Sundays seriously, but he enjoyed it.  Both dad and mom have continued to support the Catholic faith by encouraging glorious family celebrations throughout the year.  A month almost never passed without a family dinner celebrating one sacrament or another.  These gatherings always involved good meals appreciated by all.  Dad inspired us to thank God for the food harvested and cooked by strong and loving hands.  Dad followed the teachings of Jesus by demonstrating kindness, love and compassion towards others.  He literally “loved thy neighbour.”  Dad took this kindness a step further by offering his assistance to others that had gone to him in need.  He would exhaust all of his resources, even himself, if he thought he could help make someone’s life easier.  Dad also recognized the high level of importance of charitable work in life.  This is most obvious by his participation, for over 30 years, in events hosted by the Scarborough Lions Club.  The ultimate Judge, God, knows that my dad made his share of mistakes along the way, but through his faith, he would ask for forgiveness, not dwell on the past and attempt to make things right going forward.  I only hope that those whom he may have offended can be as quick as dad in forgiving and forgetting.  Jesus has inspired us to welcome children into our lives with open arms.  A day would not pass without my dad sincerely inquiring about the children of his friends and family.  Dad may not have had the same nurturing gift recognizable in my mom, but he always recognized how important children are to society and our future.  Dad continues to challenge us to be faithful even in times of despair.  He did not tremble in his faith in God, but he even became stronger, when he had to witness the suffering of his own child.  I am thankful everyday for the man that my father was and I pray that what he has ingrained into us will be honoured by generations to come.

Thank you to Robert Ricciuti for providing us with this video.

DAD                                                                    Saturday, December 7, 2013

Hi, I’m Linda Campitelli, the youngest of Fred and Margaret’s 5 children.  I’d like to take a moment or two, or three or four, to share some fond memories and interesting connections with you here today.

I would like you to keep one particular thought in mind while you are listening and that would be, my dad’s amazing connection with numbers.  My dad was a numbers guy.  He could make calculations with ease, before any operations were entered into a machine.  Math was one of his favourite subjects and it was obvious by the way he lived his life.  He had a favourite number, and subsequently his lucky number, number 13.  He was born on the 13th and now I’m sure it is of no coincidence that he leaves us here in the year 2013.  Number 7 also resonates with meaning.  Come on number 7.  Dad was too polite to be saying it out loud, but you know he was thinking it, at the craps table while playing the “don’t pass line.”  Many of you would have made that connection with the number 7, but as I continue, I challenge you to make a different association with the number 7.

As you all already know, my dad was a family man.  What made him most proud in this world was his family members, his mother; Amalia, his father; Antonino, his siblings, his wife; Margaret, his children, the spouses of his children, his grandchildren and even his great grandchildren.  I would like to reflect on the life of my father by highlighting the characteristics that his children and his wife have adopted from him.

Let’s begin with the first child, the eldest, Anthony.  A redeeming quality that comes to mind is patience.  Perhaps not recognizable by all, but both my dad and Anthony have a type of patience that only a few will understand.  That is the patience that comes with having two daughters.  That meant that these men not only raised two girls in this world but if you count their wives that would be three women to one man, a ratio that even I would not have done well with.  I can’t tell you how many times my dad waited patiently for my mom, Carla and myself to be ready to go out.  He also knew that if we were out shopping together, it wasn’t a good sign.  This patience also extends to the workplace.  Both my dad and Anthony learned that you don’t sweat the stuff you can’t control.  Something else my dad and Anthony also had in common was that they were a little bit of a ladies man, not in the double oh SEVEN type of way, but even if they were pissing someone off, by the end of it, the ladies were smiling.  Anthony has a great sense of humour, rather unique, but similar to my dad in the way that he always tried to keep things light.  For a grade 8 graduate, whose parents spoke Italian, Dad’s use of vocabulary always amazed me.  Dad, Anthony and even Uncle Bruno used language that I don’t even know where they learned it from.  Perhaps they even made some of it up themselves.  Some examples are, “snapping turtles,” and “freak of nature.”  Anthony has also followed in my dad’s footsteps by volunteering his time and support in good causes; dad in the Lions Club and Anthony in the building of a gymnastic club that continues to this day.  Both men also have done a very good job at staying abreast of current events, dad always up to date on the most recent business and sport news and Anthony always taking in and willing to share all the positive stories in the news, or not.  In addition, we all need to thank Anthony for maintaining the strong long lasting relationship my dad fostered with many of our Janellan neighbours.  Last but far from least, both men are so admirable for their dedication to the family business.  Anthony is the only sibling that stayed on board to support my dad in his role with the company.  And, like Dad and Bruno, Anthony still continues to work 6 days a week. 

Let’s move on to the second child, Lenny; the wine maker, the garden grower, the entrepreneur.  Lenny was inspired by dad to make his own drinkable wine, mostly because he couldn’t bring himself to drink dad’s vinegar.  Dad was so proud that his children, especially Lenny, were inspired by his own family’s business mentality.  Similar to bisnonno running his own farm and Vira running her own company, Lenny created his own conglomerate; J and F Waste.  Lenny also carried on the legacy of bisnonno and dad, by becoming a farmer.  In the short summer months that we have, these men have worked so hard to keep up with the growth of their crops, a strenuous task given that fruits, vegetables and weeds continue to grow all SEVEN days of the week.  Like dad, Lenny also shares his produce with family, friends and neighbours.  At the work place, there are often bushels of veggies for the staff members during the harvest months.  Lenny inherited the passion for family lineage by putting much time and effort into hosting all sorts of family functions and even organizing Campitelli family picnics.  He even joined dad and Uncle Nino’s team in importing Campitelli homemade olive oil straight off the boat fromItaly.  We have Uncle John inItalyto thank for this supply of oil.  My dad’s interest in good old Canadian hockey was revealed through Lenny’s coaching of his own son’s hockey, through Lenny’s interest in playing as an adult, and through the effort that Lenny puts into creating an actual arena sized hockey rink in his backyard, in spite of global warming.  Finally, at the end of a shitty day, when all else in life seems pointless, both my dad and Lenny have the admirable ability to sit down, with a cold beer, and laugh away their problems while viewing the most popular comedy sit-coms of the time, from Cheers, to Sienfeld, to Everyone loves Raymond, to Friends, to Two and a Half Men and finally the Big Bang Theory.

Let me move on to the third child, Michael.  Being born on St. Paddy’s day, the Luck of the Irish, Mike like dad enjoyed toying with the idea of fortune.  I know my dad had some interest in the stock market, and I know many dad’s teach these things to their sons, however, there were many times when I overheard my dad and Mike talk and I often wondered who taught whom about the stock market. However, I’m not quite as sure that Mike liked playing the Lotto as much as dad.  Maybe all of us siblings should have been playing Lotto Super SEVEN.  Dad’s excitement towards business investments and especially property investments completely rubbed off on Mike.  Dad was so proud that Mike had taught his own son how to be cheap, save money and develop his very own portfolio at a young age.  It is no coincidence that this grandchild is named after him; Alfredo John.  If anything demonstrates my dad’s character the most, it has to be how he offered to pay thousands of dollars to have a grandchild named after him, leave it to Mike to take advantage of this opportunity.  Let us consider Mike the athlete.  Unfortunately, my dad was not the most athletic by far.  But, he did put his heart and soul into playing baseball, and he took the position of back-catcher very seriously.  My dad watched the weekly games of the Toronto Maple Leafs and the Toronto Blue Jays religiously. My dad may not have supported the time that his children put into sports, but he inspired the love of it in many other ways.  Mike’s interest and success in wrestling never went unnoticed by my dad.  And, I’m sure that my dad used Mike’s interest in football as an excuse to engage in conversations with some of his favourite American relatives, you know, the Ardellinis of Milwakee.  My dad is also known to be the super stag organizer, whether you find this to be admirable or not, depends on which side of the fence you sit.  However, you can’t knock the high level of organizational skills involved.  More than anything, we all know that dad enjoyed sitting and playing poker with his pals the most.  The success of Mike’s Texas Holdem tournaments and Lobsterfests, that were held as fundraisers for the benefit of Team Impact, the wrestling team Mike mentored, surly do demonstrate all the positive characteristics that he shared with dad in this regard.  Mike also shared dad’s interest in fine liqueur, lemonchello.  Ultimately we have my dad’s brother John to thank for that.  Dad’s passion for traveling, wore off on Mike at a very young age, Mike traveled toGreeceandJapanbefore any of his immediate family independently traveled out ofNorth America.  And, finally, Mike can be recognized for making the bottling of tomatoes into a fine organized production of art. 

The fourth child: Carla: The family girl.  If you thought my father was instrumental in promoting and maintaining the strong family connection among his relatives and siblings, Carla too played a similar role in our family.  With love, excitement and joy, she encouraged the countless family dinners in mom and dad’s kitchen.  And, as the family grew, and as the volume grew, for many of us, it meant eating while perched up, sitting balcony style, on the countertop.  Her commitment to family was most evident by the amount of interest she took in simply spending time with both the young and the elderly.  I was always very amazed at how well she new all the members of dad’s immediate and extended family here and inItaly.  Carla and my dad shared a passion for their deep Italian roots from the love of the food, to the love of the culture, and to the love of the country itself.  Carla had had such a great desire to learn Italian and after working very hard, she was able to communicate with the best of them.  My dad was so proud when she was crowned Ms. Fosaccesia, the symbolism was very powerful.  In addition, Dad couldn’t talk enough about the professional success of his mom’s relatives, the Procaccini family, and he spoke similarly about Carla when she took on the professional role of a teacher.  Carla too was inspired by dad’s interest in sports, she played baseball growing up and she coached many school teams.  Carla was a young girl when she started to work Saturdays and summer holidays at J & F and she strived very hard to keep abreast of the intricate workings of the family company.  She also developed special relationships with many of those associated with the business.  This was most obvious when reflecting on the guests at her wedding, many were company related friends.  And we can’t forget the significance of her wedding invitations being printed by Mr. Wright.  Carla raised her children to also reflect the admirable characteristics of dad.  Despite Joseph’s young age, many could not overlook the resemblance to his nonno.  Joseph is quite the entrepreneur himself, from running golf ball digs, to running candy stands, and to offering yard services.  And, with thanks to dad, even Joseph managed to get himself into his own share of trouble, especially when dad picked him up and took him off to J and F for the day.  Carla was also adamant in making sure that her family continued dad’s tradition of strawberry picking and apple picking at Dr. Passafume’s farm.  And, Carla, similar to Mike, was also bitten by the travel bug.  Compared to her siblings, she visited the most continents and if given the opportunity she may have visited all SEVEN.

The fifth: Me: Linda.  I’ve tried to honour my dad’s commitment to the Catholic faith in all that I do.  I will fondly remember attending Sunday masses and Midnight masses with dad, he always followed along in his missal and despite his lack of musical talent he sang every choral part of the mass with glorious enthusiasm.  When dad missed Sunday mass it was mostly because he was tending to his vegetable garden.  I was honoured to be able to be a part of dad’s involvement in the Lions Club, even if it was in a minimal way.  I thoroughly enjoyed selling Chocolate Easter Bunnies and Christmas Fruit cakes to all our neighbours and friends.  In addition, the Sunday visits that dad and I had with Zia Mary and Uncle Claudio at their home inScarboroughhad a large influence on me.  I’m sure that the serious discussion around the maintenance of the lottery pool has had some influence on my own gambling interests.  And, no doubt, the heated debate between my dad and my uncle concerning the Conservative and the NDP parties prepared me for my teaching days ahead.  On a separate note, Dad liked to have some responsibility in managing his vehicles, to the dismay of his brother Bruno.  I recall countless times of Bruno hollering in anger as dad had some family vehicle in the shop under some kind of maintenance or repair.  Many of the mechanics will remember the grey Volkswagon golf that dad bought for Carla and then was later driven by both Nadia and Erica.  As well, the first Mercedes that passed from dad to Carla to Anthony.  Both of these cars had expired past their best before dates long before dad was willing to put them to pasture.  Dad would never let you throw something out that was not completely broken and some would say that my own tendency of hoarding comes from him.  My siblings will be sure to tell you that I have managed to fill my parent’s basement with stuff that should have gone into the waste bins before we had to pay for garbage removal.  I also always wondered about the special relationship dad developed with the tire men, from Frank Anderson to present day employees, I think it had something to do with him always wanting to repair or fix tires rather than replace them.  There may have been some issues with Uncle Bruno over this one as well.  However, as a young lady growing up, I was usually unique in my ability to maintain the oil, windshield wiper fluid and the coolant of my vehicle.  One of my fondest memories is my dad’s lesson on flat tire changing on the street in front of our Janellan home.  My desire to study criminology and political science in university and my attempt at getting into law school was inspired by my dad’s interest in law and his keen responsibility as a Canadian citizen.  To much aggrivation to my cousin Emily, my dad had an integral role to play in the development of the legal department of J & F.  He took his interest in the legal aspect of the company even further when he became an agent for many family, friends and associates on many personal legal matters.  Like dad I will set my goals high, like finding the end of the SEVEN coloured rainbow, but I will also be happy with what I accomplish along the way. Finally, some say that I have inherited my dad’s “gift of the gab.”  After listening to me today, you probably all agree with that. 

The sixth: My mom: Margaret Jane Clinkinboomer Campitelli: Bonnie, Marg or Maggie: the Rock of Gibraltar.  How fitting that my parents visited it.  With many thanks to mom they survived the SEVENth year itch, the 14th, 21st, 28th, 35th, 42nd, 49th,, and the 56th.  This year they celebrated their 57th wedding anniversary.  My mom is from a family of eleven, 13 if counting her parents, could the number 13 in this regard be a coincidence?  Every member of my mom’s family has provided her with valuable life long lessons that we continue to hear about today.  My dad was a great man and as they say behind every great man there is a great woman, and maybe even a greater woman.  If mom was greater, it only helped contribute to the awesome man that dad was to have had such a wonderful lady in his life.  The two of them were so united, that it is difficult to identify who has influenced whom.  But, how could my dad have survived in life without my mom’s plate of pasta and pasta sauce for him at least twice every week?  And what would he have done without his daily lunch, the one made at least ¾ of the time with loving hands?  Mom would always have a list of things for my dad to fix or work on around the house, unfortunately despite dad’s good intentions the wait resulted in mom learning to do a lot on her own or mom creating amazing relationships with all sorts of family handy helpers and non-family handy helpers that practically became family, from painters to plumbers.  We always appreciated the expert help because much of what dad worked on in the house ended up working in reverse when he was done.  In addition, we can’t over look the influence my dad had on my mom’s new found hobby of gambling.  If Rama only knew what it was getting into with the Campitelli’s, it may not have opened.  On a more serious note, my mom’s strength during pregnancy, child birth, raising children and grandchildren and getting through her own surgeries is a reflection of the strength that my dad had in life, the strength he needed when being in the hospital after being crushed by a forklift, the strength he needed while his daughter was sick and the strength he needed the last year of his life.  Finally, mom was always quick and eager to help family and friends in any way that she could, and both her and dad did a lot of this together.  But, mom could not provide assistance to dad when family and friends needed dad to witch a well for them.

That leaves my dad: Fred, Freddie, Alfredo: Our SEVENth family member. Dad gave all us children the greatest gift of all.  He demonstrated what children need most, reliability, consistency and commitment in a world so full of uncertainty and change.  You could almost set your watch to my dad’s daily routines.  When I was young, he was up at 6:00, listened to 1050 Chum morning news on his radio alarm clock, washed up and was in the kitchen for a cup of coffee and a daily read of the Toronto Star, once in his pickup truck on the way to work he would listen to 680 news, at work by 8:00, at 10:00 a visit to the coffee truck, he always made time for lunch, and he locked up the door with Bruno between 7:00 and 9:00, he was home in time to eat dinner while watching baseball or hockey and ready for bed right at the end of the game.  All of this with his wife, 5 children, siblings, parents, friends, employees and business associates weaving in and out of the hours of his day.  Dad was truly his own man and despite his mistakes along the way that are only his own, he is everything that we will strive to be and we will even strive for more because that is what he encouraged.  His grandchildren already reflect his nature and I pray that generations to come will continue to demonstrate his characteristics.  All his children, grandchildren and great grandchildren, continue his love for the sun and the beach; and if you would like to see our cloned competitive spirit you could challenge us, because we are always ready to play a game of beach volleyball…Campitellis vs. the World. 

Dad we could always bet on you.   You were our greatest probability.  But, with all luck and superstition aside, did it cross any of our minds that my dad was a “don’t pass” player in craps because he was from a family of 7 and he himself had his own family of 7.  I find it very interesting that my dad was so fascinated with numbers.  It makes me think about the amazing numerical patterns in nature and the concept of infinity itself.  I believe that life is forever lasting.  And that my dad is in heaven with my sister and the many others that he loved so dearly.  I wait for the day that someone else can continue the tradition of a family of 7.

Now, I’ll always remember two things about dad at the ball game, how he loved eating peanuts and how he always gave his best in the 7th inning stretch.  A stretch in which you are all in need of.  Dad would want us all to take a break, stretch and then get back to the old ballgame of life.