She was my Wonder Woman
From your niece
Keertana

Today is October 4. If she had been alive today, she would have….

….turned 45 years old
….been celebrating with little Ani, Samit and Kavita Aunty 
….ordered her favourite Chinese food 
….let Ani cut her cake for her and gorge on it 

….received beautiful, thoughtful gifts from her family as she did each year
….created many new memorable videos with Ani on Amma’s School

….been gearing up for the upcoming festival season – buying dry fruits, little silver baubles and silks

….individually replied to every single social media post thanking her numerous friends, colleagues and followers who would unfailingly wish her each year

….notched up several new milestones in her various business avatars

Although she will always be in our memories, in Ani’s little thoughts, in Samit’s quiet evenings, in Dad’s reminisces….who are we kidding? She isn’t here with us anymore, no matter how much we all miss her, no matter how much Ani needs her, no matter how strong Samit is trying to be….

Some say it was unavoidable, some say ‘honi ko kaun taal sakta hai’, some say ‘pichle janam ka asar hoga’….But reality is.. woh tho chali gayi na – aur peeche hum logon ko chod gayi…

How do we deal with it? There are no shortcuts, we have to go through the process of grieving, random actions triggering a memory from what seemed like just a few days ago like tears suddenly streaming down your face when you least expect them to, a saree that you wear that was given by her (all my best sarees came from her J) and when your hand goes to dial her number and the brain suddenly realises there is no ‘her’ to dial L

Will we ever get over it, or move on? I believe NO. However, over time the pain will get duller, as you will ‘get used’ to her not being around.

Does that mean we forget her? Of course not! You find ways to remember her, to commemorate her, to carry on her legacy and to do the bidding she set out to do. It is a tall order, and while I share a similarity in voice with her, I am not her.

We miss you Geethu, more than my words can say.

A short snapshot of her life - composed in the hours after her passing! As I trawled through the pictures that made their way to me, through WhatsApp, from email, from FB, from Messenger -  from friends, colleagues, wellwishers, old schoolmates, college mates ...... the floodgates of memories opened. 
In her short life, she accomplished so much, breaking so many barriers, and achieving so many dreams

Here are some pictures that try to capture our Geetha over the last 15 years from Google Photos and Picasa. 

Geetha made it a point to be around her family and for all key occasions, functions and ceremonies. She would travel without hesitation and at short notice across the cities, country and the world- with full preparation and fully dressed up ! 

Please look at the gallery for the relevant photos with captions.

Geetha was ever smiling

An imperfect incomplete sketch of Geetha I started scribbling, without her knowledge ... while she was sitting for the summer placements at XLRI in 1999.. She got up and left so could never complete it ... nor share it !! ....
Life is strange at times. 

“May God bless and keep you always

May your wishes all come true

May you build a ladder to the stars

And climb on every rung

May you stay forever young”

- Bob Dylan

Words, language, sentence. If only they are enough to express what I want to say about Geetha. This is going to be difficult and perhaps a random rambling through memories.

 

A friend, an inspiration, a confidant, a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister and much, much, much more. For me she is very special, a true friend of a different gender. How silly it now seems that we boys and girls of DTEA 94 batch (at least some) didn’t use to talk to each other till well into 11th & 12th. How unfortunate we were to miss those moments where we could have been friends for longer.

 

I must admit, I got to know her better in later years since after we had left school. Even though she became a lot of thing over the years, for me she never aged beyond the days of 12th and college years when I got to know her as a smart, humane, ambitious and friendly person, mostly through letters. One of my fondest memories with her was of those 7 days of 1997/8 when I lived in her house in Bangalore and got to know the wider family - Hari, Indu, Uncle and Aunty. Those were our formative years and the confidence along with the clarity of thought that she had then, only shows how obvious it was to see her excel in her career and life.

 

A charming person, who anyone takes a liking to after few minutes of interaction. Even now my Mom has fond memories of her when she stayed with us when she came back to Delhi after her MBA to join or train in HCL. It was a pleasure to see her advance in her career with a passion that I have seen only in a few. She’s an example of what one can do when something is done with passion. Am sure we all would have witnessed over the years the zeal with which she takes up things and does it with ardour and energy. Truly impressive.

 

She impressed not only in good and flourishing times but also in times of personal challenges. As a man, perhaps I can never fully gauge and empathise with the enormity of the challenges she must have faced as a girl in a society that’s patriarchal in design and structure. However, the way she managed to handle it, tackle it and come out of it is nothing but an example to get inspired and follow.

 

It gladdens my heart to see that since then she has made a beautiful and love-filled life with Samit and now Anirudh. A true gentleman and perfect partner that Samit is, my heart goes out to him for the enormous loss he must be feeling. He’s a perfect foil for her. Samit, thanks for being in her life. Can’t even bring about writing about the sweet little bundle - Anirudh. What all she wanted to be and do with Anirudh. The poems and the video of her for Anirudh make us realise what possibilities have been robbed from her and Anirudh. If this is not cruel then what is.

 

Sitting here, now in London, so far off from where our friendship began makes me realise how unfortunate and useless, I am for not being able to help her in her time of need. A pang of guilt perhaps I will carry forever, but such is the time that makes us realise how vulnerable and powerless we are. So, the only thing I can pray for, to the powers that be, is that hope she is in a better place and make the life of her loved ones better as compensation to the irreplaceable loss they have been made to suffer.

 

I still can’t believe that I wouldn’t be able to talk to her anymore. She was always just a few clicks away to reach out and talk to. A luxury and fortune that I now realise didn’t do justice to. Since her passing, the love and admiration for her in our friends’ group only shows how much loved she is how much we all will miss her.

 

But I think it would be a disservice to just miss her. I want to remember her. I personally will remember her for many things, but If I have to remember her for one thing, I guess it would be for how she’s an example of an empowered person who inspires and loves. I wish there are more people like her. It would make the world a better place. A place that could now have been much much better had she not been taken away from it. 


Remembering you always,

Sridhar