hi mom, i just wanted to let you know how my day went. I went to the doctor as you would always get on me about.  My sugar and cholesterol has been really high but im working on getting it back to normal. I promised you i would try and take care of myself. It has been really difficult you not being here with me. Sometimes i think about bringing tory in the room to see you in the mornings like i use too. she misses you. We went grocery shopping today and i thought about all the snacks i use to get you. its hard to leave there all the things you use to love to eat. I finally went back to work, this has been really hard for me too.  I see outfits that i know you would like and now i cant bring them home to show you and see your face light up. Or you tell me to stop buying you all this stuff. I know your favorite thing is to shop. It doesnt feel the same anymore. I want to be able to move on with my life, but i really dont know how im going to do this. I pray everyday that the Lord gives me some sort of peace within myself. I cry to myself wishing i could have just that one more day with you. To hold you and tell you how much i love you. I still want to plan a BIG birthday party for you mom. In y our memory. I know how much you talked about having your party this year. that meant alot to you. i want to honor you mom. well i guess i better stop wrring now. I will be checking in on you to let you know how im doing. I love you forever mom. your baby girl Becky.

I truly miss you mom.  I miss tlkng to you every day or either every other day.  I remember that when we had our differences over little petty things, we wouldn't talk for at least 2 days, then you would cll me and ask me "Are you still mad at me?"  I would say that I forgot all about it.  I miss sharing my deepest thoughts with you and asking for your advice.  There are times that I forget that you are not here, and I want to pick up the phone to talk with you.  When you told me that you were planning your own funeral, I didn't want to hear it and tried to change the subject, but you wouldn't let up.  I just didn't want to accept it, and I'm still trying to cope with it to this day.  Just thought I'd let you know that I have asked Emma to be my mom in your place and she was overjoyed.  I know you are in a better place and happy seeing everybody.  Tell them all hi for me, especially Dad and Kita.  Will see you some day soon.  Don't worry about me, I will be okay.  Love you mom always. 

May you rest now. I remember the times you came to Kansas City to visit.

How you loved the dollar stores. You were always so happy. i enjoyed being with you and taking you around. The last time you came for my grandmothers funeral, (your sister Thula) you said you did not make it in time to see her.

I hope you two are having a wonderful reunion now, with all your sisters and brothers. This family continues to grow because of all of you.

One day I woke up and used the bathroom and went to my grandma's room and she "said sammy what are you doing?". And I "said nothing are you okay"? and she was looking at me. Later on she was gone with my mom and I was sitting there waiting for her to come back. When I had found out that she had past away I was going to cry but I was a big boy I holded it in and was pacing around the livingroom. Then started to cry it felt like my heart was broken to the point that I just bursted out crying. I miss my grandma so much I wish she could come back and spend a lot of time to gether so we could live with her the last day before she would die I wish she would had died in my arms not in the hospital.

i will always remember when i would come in from work and check on her the smile she gave me when i would come in her room. she would look up to me and tell me good morning. We would plan her breakfast.Whatever she wanted she pretty much got. She loved her coffee. She would not eat her breakfast without her coffee. She would always let me know when the breakfast was acceptionally good. We sometimes would plan our day to go shopping or go out to eat. She loved to eat at Granny's (all you can eat resturant). We would go to the dollar store where she loved to get her greeting cards, mom had so many of them she could have started her own store...smile...she loved to play chinese checkers...i could never beat her in that game. she had really good skills. She would be so humble when she won. I would bring her great granddaughter in the room and she would just light up and laugh and the baby would too and say hi. mom would say she thinks im the funnest thing. I think seeing her face and her granddaughters smile would make her day. My days with mom will never be the same. There is not one day that i stop thinking about her. I wish i could hold her one more time and tell her how much i love her. I Love you mommy and i will never forget you