"To live in hearts we leave behind, is not to die.
  • 32 years old
  • Born on October 15, 1953 in Oskaloosa, Iowa, United States.
  • Passed away on March 2, 1986 in Oskaloosa, Iowa, United States.
This memorial website was created in memory of our loved one, Greg McVay 32 years old , born on October 15, 1953 and passed away on March 2, 1986. We will remember him forever.
Posted by Julie McVay on 16th October 2018
A day late on this. Thinking of you on your Birthday Greg. 65. Wow. There are just too many things that I know we would have done over these years....it makes me sad to think about how much we missed out on sharing. I’d be giving you a hard time about turning “Medicare” age. For sure. But honestly I just wish. I wish things had turned out differently. And that you could have lived the life you had planned. Raising your boys, loving them and cheering them on. Doing all the hunting and boating and skiing and everything else you loved to do. Meeting your first grandchild. Saying goodbye to Mom and Dad. Death steals time away. You were born 65 years ago. You lived 32 of those. I enjoyed having you as my brother for 26 of those. But you’ve always been with me. I hope this memorial helps keep your memory alive for more than just me. Happy Birthday Greg.
Posted by Aaron McVay on 15th October 2018
I wish I had a chance to get to know you and you me. I find myself having a roller coaster of emotion, sadness, anger, frustration, all within a minute thinking about all the things I don't even know that I missed. I know you've positively impacted many lives, and that's a legacy to be proud of.
Posted by Julie McVay on 5th March 2018
I come here to 'see' you Greg. To see the photos and remember, the best that I can, times when things were simpler and my family was whole. It almost always makes me cry, but sometimes it's okay to cry and give permission to myself to grieve. Even though you have now been gone for as many years as you lived. That blows my mind and makes me feel a little guilty for being able to live and love in this life when you no longer can. My vigils here through, they make me appreciate life and remind me 'to' LIVE. Live each day like you did. If I can just try to do that, I can maybe make sense of the losses in my life. In everyone's life. Things here have gotten pretty crazy Greg. Seems harder to see the light sometimes in this busy world and I often think of the old days when life was less busy and memories were made and remembered only in our minds and not on Facebook. Even though it's busy and so very complicated in this world now, I know that it would be just a little easier with you here. I think all the time about all the things we might have done together. How you might have been a part of my world, helped me with things and let me help you with things. I feel bad I never got the chance to be the adult sister you could count on too. I was still young and ungrounded. Just know, I adored you Greg. I looked up to you like all little sisters do when they have a hero for a big brother. You were a superhero to more people than me. So, I just want to say that I'm thinking of you. And I know they are too.
Posted by Tom Walling on 4th March 2018
Best friend we miss you and all we could of done down here. Say hello to your folks and.my dad. Tom
Posted by Julie McVay on 15th October 2016
Happy 63rd Greg. I am thinking of you today and missing you as always, but knowing that your spirit lives on inside those who loved you and who you loved. I wish I could give you a card today that would make us both laugh. Big hug to my big brother on his Birthday. Somehow you still live in my world. And that makes it easier.
Posted by Elizabeth Fischinger on 3rd March 2016
So many warm memories are flooding back to me! I hope that your journey home was a good journey. We have missed you dear cousin, Greg.... Say hello to Sam & Marty AND my mom & dad..... see you when it is my turn to walk that journey too. I love you.... Beth
Posted by Julie McVay on 2nd March 2016
30 years. I cannot believe it's been that long that you've been gone. I treasure every memory of you still. I think of your helping hands when things need repair. I struggle for your steady nature when life is crazy. I ponder your day to day life if you were still here. I hang onto you when I feel life is too big. I rest my head on your chest when I need family. I remember your loving teasing when I feel alone. I channel the feeling a gift from you gave. I seek to reflect you when I catch myself failing. I sense your calm in the midst of frenzy. I center myself when your eyes see me. I strive for your sense of friendship. I keep in me your generosity. I fill up from the love you still give. I grieve for the moments missed. I gleam with your humor and laugh. I redeem myself reaching for your character. I breathe in the earth and sky and stars and think of you. I hold you in my heart forever.... still. You affect me, teach me and guide me....still. Thank you big brother. I miss you... but mostly I remember you...still.
Posted by Aaron McVay on 2nd March 2016
I just realized (or maybe realized again) that I'm the same age as my dad when he passed away. That's pretty crazy.
Posted by Julie McVay on 15th October 2015
Happy Birthday Greg. To celebrate, my first installment of old photos of you have been uploaded with more to come. I'm digging through Mom and Dad's to dig up what I can find to add this year....it's going to be 30 years that you've been gone soon and part of me can't believe it's been that long ago that I took my last photo of you out in the back yard at Mom and Dad's holding Aaron and watching the horses...just to give him some special time even though the rest of us were inside having family time. You.....you were out there spending a special moment with your son. One of the many times you put your kids first, giving them what they needed to have the best 'life start'. I watched you leave the house with him and followed you out...to capture that moment....that decision...that part of who you were. And part of me aches because it's been so long since I have heard your voice, laughed with you, had 'Greg' Pizza with you.... But today, I celebrate your birth. You were born and you lived and lived well. And I won't forget you big brother. You are in my heart and there you'll stay.
Posted by Linda Smith on 15th October 2015
Big brothers. They teach us so much. And while they might transform and leave us physically, they are always with us. We know they are here, not a big brother anymore, but still a protective guiding force in our lives. We will always be together. When my form changes, our two energies will continue to connect and recharge, side-by-side, leading and following in turn, the only permanence being love.
Posted by Julie McVay on 23rd September 2015
Thanks for sharing Aaron. This is an excellent reminder to everyone who spent time with Greg that they can add photos anytime to this page. Take those old paper photos out, take a picture of it with your digital camera and put it up here where we can all see it. Greg's Birthday is coming up. Let's see if we can add some more memories.
Posted by Aaron McVay on 22nd September 2015
Just thinking of Dad and wanted to browse the page again and say thanks to everyone who has visited and posted. I don't remember my dad at all so all I really have are memories that others have of him. Thank you
Posted by Julie McVay on 2nd March 2015
Thank you Linda, my dear friend, for taking time to post this and remember my brother today and for the kind comment. It is always a time to reflect when the 2nd of March approaches. I should probably remember Greg's Birthday more, but in truth, the day of his death is truly a celebration of his life for me. I try not to dwell on the sadness of missing him, but on the great memories of him and the great gift of love that he gave to his wife, extended family, friends and most of all, his two sons. I know that he would be so proud of both of them. Unconditional love. I think in many ways I took that phrase for granted until so much of it left this earth for me. Now, I can only cherish it and try not to live in regret. ....and have the same unconditional love for those who are still here. Greg, you lived. I won't let the memory of you die. I promise.
Posted by Linda Smith on 2nd March 2015
My great friend Julie is in part the wonderful person she is because she had a big brother who loved her unconditionally. Julie, I wish you peace in your heart and the growing sense of Greg's presence there.
Posted by Julie McVay on 2nd March 2014
I am remembering you today Greg. I remember you every day, but March 2nd is always a tough one. It approaches with gathering malaise, each day in February draws this day more near. I don't dread it, I don't wish it away....I only hold it shrouded like an old keepsake that only a few other people would ever be interested in. Like a flurry of memory and sensation, the day comes and purges the bits of the day 28 years ago into my mind...what my will allows anyway. It's passing brings this wistful bit of pain, but in so doing, brings your 'dash' of life to the forefront of my inner thoughts. So, for this twinge, I trade the photographs in my mind...the glimpses of your smile, your laugh, your pride, your happiness and your love. While I long for another time, I am grateful to remember them. You live in my heart big brother.
Posted by Julie McVay on 15th October 2013
Happy Birthday Greg! The big 6-0! Can't believe it. I am getting older and I really wish you were here to see me age. I could poke fun of how you are still riding 4 wheelers and skiing at your age. Miss you Brother...Miss you. I hope somehow you can hear me talk to you when I do. It makes me feel better thinking that you can. If you can, tell Mom and Dad I love them and miss them too.
Posted by Julie McVay on 15th October 2012
Happy Birthday Big Brother. Remembering you today....and every day.
Posted by Tom Walling on 6th March 2012
Julie, your family was a large part of ours and I miss Greg and your folks alot, and I think of them often. we will all seem them sooner than we relize, Tom.
Posted by Julie McVay on 2nd March 2012
It never gets easier to bear this day each year. I know I should try to remember all of the good times we had and how much you meant to me and how we loved each other....but sometimes all I can think of is how much I wish you were here. Feeling sorry for myself I guess.....but I miss you Greg. Even more now that Mom and Dad are gone. Every day. I SO wish you were here big brother.
Posted by Shannon De Penning on 2nd March 2012
Julie, I just wanted to say that I am thinking of you and your family today--Greg will be in your hearts forever. Peace and love.
Posted by Adam Mcvay on 9th February 2012
Its hard to believe this year i will be the same age as dad was when he passed! The good do die young. Julie this is a nice way to remember him. Thank you. I only have a few memories of him now, but i love looking at old pics. I also wish Aaron could have had at least as much time with him as i did!
Posted by Julie McVay on 28th March 2011
I learned to love cabbage when Greg would eat it all the time to make weight. He also used me as his wrestling practice partner at home. I put up quite a fight, and I think he even let me win sometimes. ;-)
Posted by Randy Roozeboom on 27th March 2011
(Randy L.) Greg and I spent many hours bucking heads on the wrestling mat. Our "wrestling room" was the cafeteria where Crandall would max out the thermostat the night before a meet so we could try to make weight. Be in peace, bro.
Posted by Linda Smith on 2nd March 2011
I didn't know Greg very well. I met him one night when you and I were out and about during our Central days. He was out with some friends from work and had a big smile and hug for you when he saw you. (I think he also tucked a fifty dollar bill into your pocket :-) I wish I had known him better, knowing how much you love him and how much impact he had on your life.
Posted by Randy Roozeboom on 2nd March 2011
I know it has been 25 years but I don't think I can remember a day I haven't thought about Greg it might be fishing or hunting or just having fun and if you knew me and Greg... we did have some fun. God I miss my best friend!
Posted by Shannon De Penning on 2nd March 2011
I didn't know Greg, but hearing stories from Julie about him make me feel as though I did know him. This is a beautiful way to honor his memory. Shannon
Posted by Julie McVay on 2nd March 2011
Twenty Five Years ago today. It's hard to believe. I still miss you every day and wonder how all of our lives might have been different. I hope that some of your friends will leave a tribute to share more about you. I know that would mean a lot to Adam and Aaron and someday to Kylor.
Posted by Julie McVay on 28th February 2011
I am creating this memorial for my brother 25 years after his death. We didn't have the internet when he died, but we do now and I want to use it to allow people to remember him with their memories, thoughts and stories. Please feel free to share his Forever Missed address with anyone you think may want to share something about Greg.

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