Before dawn on November 15, under the biggest, brightest super moon in our lifetimes, Harry departed the temporal plane for ... whatever is next, whatever came before, whatever is eternal. Through a happy coincidence, or fate, his apprentice from 35 years ago and now a dear friend, was in town from Lopez Island, WA, and was with us when Harry drew his last breath. With aromatic cedar leaves from his home, Hawk performed Native American blessings before and after Harry died that were a great comfort to Harry, Janet, Ehren, Lydia, and everyone else present.
We sat with Harry’s body and played songs Harry wrote and recorded. Two friends from Durham Meeting came to join us. There was a great sense of relief in the room and a space for Harry's memory to be present without the pain of his suffering. We told our favorite stories of Harry’s life and there was more laughter than tears.
On the evening of November 17, Hawk and Janet were present for the beginning of the cremation, and felt a deep sense that Harry has been happy with every aspect of his transition. Everyone is doing well and will appreciate your thoughts and prayers.
We will celebrate Harry’s life in a Quaker meeting for worship at 2:00 pm on Saturday, December 3rd at Friendship Friends Meeting, 1103 New Garden Road in Greensboro. We welcome your presence in person or in spirit.
Memorial gifts can be given to Hospice and Palliative Care of Greensboro and to the Friendship Friends Meeting Building Fund. Please share remembrances below or on the Stories page.
Friendship is deeper than words can express
When friends are true it brings happiness
It cannot be measured by dollars or miles
Nor can it be found in outwardly smiles
It's something you hold ever close to your heart
It cannot be false, you can tell it apart
When looking for friends, we must realize
That we're not as perfect as we might surmise
We all have our faults, and I'm sorry to say
I have quite a few, but it's good in a way
For it shows me my friends, the ones that are true
I'm a darn lucky guy to have a good friend like you
I met Harry in 2011 at my 50th high school reunion. He was beginning to fail then, but I could easily sense the gentle lightness of his being. At that time Harry gave me a tiny book of poems, including the one I quote below. I have shared this poem with people of all ages and persuasions, and find it a sustaining guide for navigating the uncertainty of the times. It is displayed above my desk.
I only saw Harry one other time, last year in his home. He was bedridden, and It was hard for him to talk. But when I spoke of my love for Janet, his response came slowly with effort but clearly and full of heart: " I'm lucky! " ......
....and so am I, for this small glimpse of a wonderful person.
A Letter to My Life
Dear Life,
Be kind and comforting
when I mourn
Be happy and vibrant
when I celebrate
Be patient while
I choose my path
Be forgiving and
understanding
when I make mistakes
Be aware and supporting
when I choose wisely
Carry me softly on
your gentle breath so
I and upright and honest
True to myself and others
and to the memory of my
ancestors
by Harry Nagel
I’m just a leaf that’s changing colors
I’ve hung around for quite a while
I’ve felt the rain and seen the sunshine
and made a lot of people smile
and now it’s time for me to leave you
but I don’t want you to frown
cause in the spring when you look up
you’re sure to see me hanging round
I’ll be all the shades of green
all shapes and sizes too
and in the spring when you look up
I’ll have a smile that’s just for you
