Ian Carsten

This memorial website was created in memory of Ian Carsten, our beloved son, brother, and grandson and cherished friend and teammate.

Ian was born in San Diego and was a student at Torrey Pines High School, where he was an avid swimmer. He inspired us all with his warmth and kindness as much as with his devotion to his sport and his studies. We will love and remember him forever.

Please use this website to help celebrate Ian’s life. You can post a “Tribute” (message) at the bottom of this page. You can also post a “Story” with a picture, video, or music. His family is grateful that you are willing to share your memories with them.

A memorial service will be held on Sunday, August 30th at 10:30am. It will be both an in-person ceremony and a livestream of the ceremony. Details are below.

In lieu of flowers, please consider making a donation:
To the Ian Carsten Scholarship, which will be awarded every July to the fastest 200 butterfly male and female SI Swimming graduating seniors.
To help prevent teen suicide:
North County Lifeline

Memorial Service for Ian Carsten
Sunday, August 30th at 10:30am
Memorial service will be both an in-person ceremony and a livestream of the ceremony.
While we would love for everyone to join us in-person to honor Ian’s memory and pay respects to his family, we know that we must abide by the rules and regulations for COVID-19.

Please know that if you join the memorial in-person, the park is strict with allowing only 50 guests. Please wear a mask and maintain social distance. Although this is a time when we desperately need to hug and comfort each other, please remember that it is so important to keep health and safety as a primary concern.

In-person memorial: San Dieguito Park, Area 7 (parking is $3)

***Park only allows 50 guests, pls wear your mask, pls social distance***
Bring your own chair or blanket. There are shady spots, but you can bring an umbrella if you want. Attire is informal. Length of memorial will be approx. 45 mins.

Directions: Area 7 is located in the northeast corner of the park, past the duck pond. From I-5, exit Lomas Santa Fe Dr heading East. Turn Left on Highland Drive to head toward the lower park. After about 0.7 mile, turn Right onto El Camino Real. The park entrance is on the Right. Once in the park, follow the road to the Left all the way to the end.
Posted by Suzy Manucharyan on August 27, 2020
i didn’t personally know ian but my heart aches for him and his family. as far as i’ve heard he was a great person who impacted tons. i’m sure he was, i wish i could’ve gotten to know just how good of a person people say he was. sending so much love to his peers. take care of yourselves. ian, rest easy man.
Posted by Diego Hevener on August 27, 2020
I barely even knew the guy in middle school, he probably wouldn’t even know me if you told him my name, but I remember the slightest interactions we would have scarcely in middle school and I can not remember a single bad or negative one. From someone who barely knew him, he will be missed.
Posted by Ori Lerer on August 27, 2020
Ian and I were best friends throughout most of elementary and middle school. We used to spend days and days laughing and making jokes with each other all throughout most of elementary and middle school. We even used to race to the pizza lines on Friday so that we can be the first ones there. We were in the same class pretty much all of elementary school. He was truly a special person. I remember him always having smiles on his face and finding something to laugh about even when we had tests or quizzes. We played four square every single day in elementary school, and if it wasn’t four square it was basketball or tag. In 7th grade I remember him telling me that he was going to transfer into my English class and I was so happy because I had no one else there. I even took him skating once, and the one time we could go he broke his arm in like 3 different places. He would always help me with math or English or even science when I needed and he never expected anything in return. He was truly a special person, always smiling, always happy, always laughing. My friend you will be missed by so many. Fly high
Posted by David Sanchez on August 27, 2020
Ian was always a guy that had a smile on his face, and the first to strike a conversation with me. His outgoing, lovable, and friendly personality always made my day better. A great guy, an exceptional student, and one of the best damn swimmers I’ve ever met, Ian will be remembered in my heart forever, and in the hearts of those who had the privilege of getting to know him on a deep and personal level. He had a positive effect on everyone that met him, and one that will continue living inside of us for the rest of our lives. Prayers to the Carsten family❤️
Posted by Mark Selecky on August 27, 2020
You were one of the nicest and most genuine people I had ever met. I vividly remember joking around with you in elementary school and was actually talking about it about a week ago. I cherish the moments we had I. elementary and middle school and I’m so sad to see you go. I can’t believe you’re gone and I hope you’re in a better place now. Rest easy buddy❤️
Posted by Andrew Ko on August 27, 2020
Ian I will never forget you. I remember when I met you at Ian Carstair's birthday party and you would always make so many jokes. You were such a good friend at swim meets, while we played games, and when we were at school. I won't ever forget those memories we had and those conversations we had. You inspired me to be a better competitor in the pool and I am 100% sure others feel the same.

I won't forget the times we were up all night playing squads.

I miss you so much, Andrew Ko

Posted by Mia Grust on August 27, 2020
I didn’t know him well enough to personally say we were friends, but everyone who has ever brought up his name has spoken about the light he brought. He seemed like such a intelligent and kind person. He will be missed and he won’t be forgotten.
Posted by Daniel Hoffman on August 27, 2020
He was a kind soul and I wish we could’ve had more time to talk and be around. But in the times I did spend with him he was uplifting and always brought positive energy to everyone around him. He will be missed. All love brother. Fly high.
Posted by Tomer Avgil on August 27, 2020
Me and Ian were friends in middle school and ever since then he was one of the most genuine people I’ve met. Rest easy, We all miss you. ❤️
Posted by Sophia Rauch on August 27, 2020
Ian was in my English class freshman year. He would always help me with my work even though I would never understand. He was so bright and funny and I wish he were here to know how much people loved him.
Rest easy, Ian
You will always be in our hearts
Posted by Mia Kooner on August 27, 2020
ian and i used to play csgo together. we went to the same school, and he always had a smile on his face and was cracking jokes. when we played video games together, he always made fun of me and was a happy guy all around. it hurts to see someone that seemed so happy at the time do this. rest easy buddy. i hope you’re doing okay up there.
Posted by Simone Bertucci on August 27, 2020
Dear Ian,

You were one of the nicest and smartest people I have ever met. You always made math one of the best classes, and we would always share music, and work together. We all miss you
Rest Easy
Posted by Lian Gilor on August 27, 2020
From 5th grade to high school, Ian was always one of the most sweet and genuine people I had ever met. He was always willing to help others and always cared for others. You will be so missed forever and always ❤️
Posted by Jadyn Kaplan on August 27, 2020
Dear Ian,
I am truly at a loss of words and cannot believe you are gone. I have known you since kindergarten and shared almost every class with you up until middle school. We re connected last year in our AP world class and sat next to each other pretty much the whole year so we became close again. You made me excited to go to class, knowing you would be there to make me laugh until I cried and you never failed to put a smile on my face. I will never forget your laugh and all the times you made fun of my dumb comments. I remember being upset when you weren’t in class because I knew it wouldn’t be as fun without you. Truly the purest and sweetest soul I have ever met. You were the best project partner and friend. I will forever cherish the moments I got to spend with you throughout our lives. You were the one who always gave me a pen when my ink ran out and I use it to this day, I wish I could tell you that now. You had the most contagious laugh, smile and the biggest heart ever. I am so lucky and grateful to have known you my whole life and I will miss you forever, rest easy❤️

Sending my prayers to the Carsten family❤️
Posted by Judd Berman on August 27, 2020
Dear Ian,

Had a class with you all the way back in the beginning of middle school and knew you ever since. Wish we had the chance to become closer. Always had a smile on your face and super outgoing, seemed like you always lifted others up. Rest easy
Posted by Nadia Phaneuf on August 27, 2020
I never had the pleasure of knowing Ian in elementary school, lord knows he would’ve made my life that much brighter then. I never thought in a million years this could happen and all of us have lost someone who was so special, kind, and funny. These words can’t even explain how great of a person was, and I’m really so sad as I’m sure many others are. Thank you for always bringing a smile to my face, and we’ll always remember you Ian ❤️❤️
Posted by Andrew Tracey on August 27, 2020
Ian was one of the kindest, intelligent, and funny people i know. He was the kid everyone got excited when they’d come into class or would make everyone smile by just being themselves. Ian you will be truly missed thank you for being such a good friend and inspiring others.
Posted by Mateo Pacelli on August 27, 2020

   From elementary school right the way through to high school, we always shared such good memories. Every nostalgic moment of past years brought back so many great times with you as a friend. You will forever be in my heart and in my prayers.

Love you Ian,
Mateo Pacelli
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Recent Tributes
Posted by Christina & Michael Katz on September 9, 2020
We are heartbroken to hear of Ian's passing. We care. Sending love, light and prayers to all. May love & memories bring you comfort. We are a community who loves and supports you. 
Posted by Daniela Gil on September 8, 2020
Ian, when I first met you years ago, I remember just how present and amazing your spirit and energy were. You managed to turn even the most boring sets into something we could all enjoy. Practice was nothing short of a party thanks to you, and you always knew how to make the team laugh. Just being in a lane near yours or in the hot tub after practices when you were with your friends, joking around, made me and everyone else to laugh so hard our sides hurt. When I rejoined the team some years later, yours was one of the few faces I recognized. Even though our interactions became limited to just seeing each other immediately after your practice and right before mine, and seeing each other at team events after I rejoined, seeing your excitement and energy immediately after finishing your practice would always motivate me right before I got into the pool, and the jokes I would overhear would always brighten up even my dullest days. Ian, you’ve been one of my teammates for as long as I can remember, going way back to the early days of PAC swim. Seeing you work hard every day inspired me more than anything else ever could. I still remember the first day I met you, way back then. Your smile and spirit have stuck with me since then, and I will always remember them.
Rest in peace, Ian.
Posted by Natalie Wang on September 2, 2020
Dear Ian,
I never got to know you personally after all these years of seeing you on the team, but I did know you as a big part of what I loved: PAC swim. Ever since the beginning of my life as a swimmer, I had the privilege of watching you be a supportive teammate who worked tirelessly to rise through the ranks in Butterfly. Although very few, my best memories of you were your enthusiasm, respect, and ability to bring people together pretty much anywhere like at practices. Not gonna lie when everyone was crammed into level 3/4 and still swam at the Bay Club, after practice I would always look forward to whatever smart-dumb jokes you and your friends would come up with. They were definitely something special because everybody within a 20ft radius of the hot tub would laugh. Aside from the jokes I believe the best quality about you was that you inspired a lot of people to really work hard and become a better person. A lot of the great things you accomplished reflected onto others and sparked new ambitions.
For that and many other things, I greatly appreciated having you as a teammate for several years. We’re all gonna miss you and we hope you’re at peace.
-Natalie Wang
Recent stories
Shared by Sharon Levy on August 30, 2020
It was an honor and privilege to attend Ian’s celebration of life and bear witness to some of the people whose lives he touched so deeply.  Although I never met Ian, I know how proud you are to call him your son, brother, grandson, nephew and friend. Doug, your eulogy was beautifully written and delivered, and a true testament to Ian’s awesomeness. My sincere condolences to your families and friends as you navigate through this difficult time. May your sweet soul be at peace Ian. 

A message from Jake Noble & TPASB

Shared by Jake Noble on August 28, 2020
Dear Carsten Family, 

I have no idea the pain, or thought of losing a loved one, under any condition. I do however feel the pain and sorrow that fellow Falcon has left us. As I write this, I am tearing up, my life the past few weeks has been hell. I have no home, doing school out of a hotel, and burning through money with my mom and sisters. I wake up every morning wondering how my life could be better, feeling sorry for myself, and though my situation is dreaded, I must also look behind me. I must also remember there are worse situations, there are brothers and sisters in need of help ten times more than me. Myself, and my entire ASB team is here, and willing to offer any hand in anyway we can. Do not hesitate to reach out. You are in my prayers, and forever will be. 

And Ian, I wish I had met you formally. I wish there was a chance we could have laughed together, joked together, and let me cheat off your work, because I have been told you are extremely smart! All I can say now, is rest well sir. You are in my prayers 

Shared by Abi Erle on August 27, 2020
I never really knew Ian personally, but he is one of the few faces I actually recognize from elementary school. He was in my elementary school class and I remember him because of how kind he always was to others. He always had a huge, tremendously contagious smile on his face that brightened every room he walked into. Rest In Peace Ian, we will miss you.