Easter time 2024, The years roll by, since you past. Still I miss you. Will be at the cemetery to visit with family and relatives on this Good Friday. A candle and a moment here, to remember you Jimmy. Truly, Forever Missed indeed.

The end of January this 2024, a bit of a snow storm past through. Had a cold snap already this month. A dreary time of the year for sure.

Was thinking of you Jimmy, and so , I past by to remember. I have trouble moving on, when things like this come in life. 

I am a collector of old things. Watches and clocks, ceramic figurines, At this time, I am into old cast iron typewriters and old sewing machines. I do wish I had received your bread making machine. Not that I can be bothered to actually make bread, but I recall, how you use to love baking loaves. You even took some of my advice to make better bread.  Rare to have a man, who listened to me. Yes, that was you Jimmy. There are still a number things in my home, that you helped me with. I still have one of your photos, hanging, in one of the hall ways. Jimmy you are forever missed.

Here at Christmas 2023, I received an unexpected message from the site called "Forever missed" . Seems there are real people...people who care . 

Can't say since 2019 the time of Jimmy`s passing that I ever was contacted in such a way.  What did they write...well let me share a bit of this long message.

"you've created beautiful spaces of remembrance, shared stories of love and loss, and supported each other in profound ways.

We hope the end-of--year holidays bring you moments of peace and joy, and we are here for you, holding each memory and story so special.

Warm wishes for the holiday season."

I did respond with a thank you. But the truth is , I value this site as a place where jimmy is remembered well.  For what it's worth, I have posted a photo of myself, from the year 1921 at Christmas. We all try to carry on. We all have our own share of departed to carry with us till our own time comes.  Rarely does anyone come by anymore...such is the way cemeteries tend to work. Loved ones, left in the arms of Morpheus.

Jimmy, Its now turned to early September of 2023. The month started out being exceptionally warm, but now is a very comfortable early fall temperature. Jimmy, times have changed. I recall how you were forever, doing those nighttime drives to Woodstock to take food and talk with your mom. On occasion, you would take me...even change your schedule and go at a decent hour in the mornings. Ahah ha You were always so thoughtful to me...and I truly believe you were proud to be in my company. Your mom, accepted me fully and seem to look forward to a hug, even though, her arthritis and such did hurt and she shied away from physical contact of any sort. Jimmy, I recall with joy, rides here and there in the country..back in the day when gas wasn't $1.70 per litre. Jimmy, noone comes here anymore....it's just you and me. Jimmy...I miss you.

Today, is the fourth year of your passing. life goes on, however, Jimmy, you are forever missed.  Today is July 14th, 2023

Rare is the day I don't think of you Jimmy. 

So, today would have been your birthday. I suppose that is part of the reason, we got along so well, so quickly. Fellow Gemini.

Sometimes life seems so unreal...and unfair. Yet, here I am, with nothing but your memory.  I miss you Jimmy.

I am so heartbroken man I'm gonna kill myself he was my only friend I HAVE NOTHING

To you and Jimmy, Brenda. Through you setting this site up and all the pictures you have put here it has allowed me to know my brother better than I ever did during his life. Your deep love for him brings peace to my heart. I just looked at all the pics again they truly do give me joy. I hope where ever you are you are doing well and you'r happy. I send my love to you Jimmy.

I miss you Jimmy.

This is July 14th, 2022.  Can't say I come here anymore, but it seems some do. I see there has been 2222 visits to the memorial site.  I suppose I made up the biggest portion of those.

Jimmy, was a big part of my life, and it's not easy to carry on, but all is good enough.  Surviving, with the constant Covid virus variants still about. Now the massive inflation that is picking our pockets. $10. per gallon for regular gas....a lot more for others with cars that require premium octane levels to run right. I don't know what Jimmy put into his Lexus es350, but he babied that car. No idea where it ended up...probably stolen by the so called "Estate administrator" Oh well...not my concern.  This is the anniversary date of your passing Jimmy. July 14th, 2019. Time to let you be and move on. Yet this place on the internet will remain for all time. A marker that James Elwood Birch, passed this way, once upon a time.  I still miss you Jimmy. Rest in peace.

June 8th, 2022 , I am still here. It's been a few years now, but Jimmy , you are not forgotten. Today, would have been your birthday. As fate has laid out things. There is no longer any birthdays to celebrate. You have past on from this earth. Today, I can but drop by to let you know, I think of you each day. You are missed. It seems so unfair, but such is the way life is allocated out by the almighty.  Yes, we had a fair measure of pleasant times...though not nearly enough.  Jimmy, today, would have been your birthday. A sad time of remembrance now.

Easter Long Weekend , April of 2022. The border from the USA is more friendly, when returning to Canada now,
as the Covid Virus restrictions are not so severe.

This past week, I went across the border, for a few days on business.
Picked up some things that have been there is storage
for two or three years.  
No lineups going or coming back at the border. 
As a matter of fact every where, it was so quiet.

The kids are out of school of this Spring Break,
so the hotel did have a number of families.
The place would fill up at night, but other wise
the hotels were so quiet and empty.

I liked it...seeing as I am now pushing eighty.
Quiet times is good times.
Well, I suppose it would be better, if you were about.

Visited a few of the same spots, I had done with you.

*** 

As I recall, I did all the Driving, on that final tour with you.. 

Jimmy was amused in his own way. 
To have someone else , actually do the driving,
, as he was always the one behind the wheel. 
As he put it.....
He was "James" the Chauffeur..
the hired man (so to speak)
Naturally in Jest.

***

No particular, flowers yet, though stateside,
I did see one large patch of Daffodils ,
in a protection location, by the Rapids. 

Had a lovely time...blue skies, and warm enough
to not have to wear a winter coat.
Jimmy, you would have loved it.

Jimmy, you always were such a good listener.

No, No, I think it's allergies.
Let me dab my eyes a bit before the mascara runs.
I`ll go on, but Jimmy, I do miss you so much.

Happy Easter Jimmy.
You were always so good to me.

I notice, on another such online memorial service called "Findagrave" they are having issues, with other than direct relatives setting up such memorials for loved ones.  I believe I waited quite a long time ..way longer than the recommended 3 months.  No one has come forward in over the two year period since Jimmy's passing to challenge or take over management of this memorial site.  However, if there is a direct relative wishing to take it over, I have no objections. Failing to file within a month of this notice, The present status will be deemed as sufficient for all time. Let it be known, I am not a direct relative, or share in any way, his estate values or debts. In fact, I am unaware of who Jimmy's estate administrator is.  I do know his Lexus automobile, vanished within hours of his passing. 

As I talked to a very dear friend today who is ill, and trapped in her bed unable to do any of the things she once could. I told her about this site and the effect it had on me. She's been my friend for many years, and knows, ( at least my side of the story of my life) Because of this site that you, dear Brenda , put together I was speaking in a new way . I was able to see the many different ways people are thought of by others. No matter what those thoughts are be them good or not so good, there is so much more to the story.
Life is so short, I've learned just how true that is a few times over in my life. I know all about what I have given, but have no idea what I take for granted . I left way to young to know my brother, and who he truly was. All I had was our childhood, that was not easy for any of us. We didn't get a chance to support each other, let alone know each other. As for fault I thought I knew exactly who's fault it was, why I screamed in my sleep, why I ran away dozens of times, why I felt I had no family.
I know Jimmy lived that same life, the difference was he was 4 yrs older than me, and he was male. He wasn't always kind to me... but I've learned most siblings have that story to tell. Because I never lived at home sense I was 10 yrs old, any bond we could have hoped for was unavailable. It is also the story of my sister and I.
A part of me just wants to write how I seen it, another says, I don't understand it all. The most important thought (feeling) is no one is to blame, no one wanted it to go this way, least of all our Momma. She was a beautiful lady who had a very hard life. Her momma past when she was just three yrs old. Her daddy was a bootlegger, with 3 children, two boys and my momma who was the youngest. She did truly suffer with no guidance of how to be. I truly believe she was abused. When your standing on a stool at 3 trying to wash the dishes, something is wrong.
I hope I didn't get carried away because there is so much more, I just wanted to tell why my brother and I hardly knew each other. What I have said is such a small part of what happened, I trust that you can see it isn't me looking for sympathy it's me looking for truth.
,

I have spent the last two hours reading the wonderfully deep, meaningful words of Brenda. It's hard to write this as the tears just keep flowing, you have touched my heart in a way no one ever has. You knew my brother better than I ever did. I'm broken to have to say that. We would reach out to each other every now and again with long stretches in between.
I truly did not know about this site. I do feel honoured to be here at this moment though. My tears are for you as well Brenda, I am so glade you were in Jims life. Our family story isn't a pretty one, it reads like a mystery, I want to believe our next life will be different. Jim did have a very close relationship with our Mom, and he did watch over her while she was always there to listen to him. They gave each other comfort with a little crazy mixed in at times.
So thank you dear Brenda, I'm sorry you felt so alone on here, I wish I had known. I so hope we get to talk.
Rest in peace my special brother, may we walk another path.

Today it happened again. Surprising that these past couple of years, hasn't removed the memory.  I was making a pot of Herbal Tea, and from somewhere, thoughts of Jimmy came. I could swear he was right here....and yet he wasn't....isn't....hard to put my finger on it, but for sure his memory lingers.  Reason enough to come by and leave this note, for no other reason, but the missing and wishing we could have had more time.

It's the end of January 2021. The weather has turned colder and there is some snow falling . The Covid 19 virus rages on.  Jimmy, you missed all of this. Seems with your passing, things have changed, the world is mired down in this virus.  Hardship for many, as the economies have shutdown. Will we survive these time...who knows.  I do know, most days, I think of you. It`s Saturday morning early here, and I`m thinking of you. Missing you dearly.

This morning as I look out in the quietness of the morning sky to the east, I can see that bright morning star called Venus.  I know it's one of the planets in our own solar system but to me and this time it's a star.  Tomorrow will mark the one year anniversary of your passing on. I still have so many images in my mind. That final visit the day before you died. I arrived for the second visit of the day. You were upset, because the staff seem to be ignoring you and you actually wanted to go home. 

I explained that they had a "Code red" meaning that they were rushing around closing all doors in the hospital to try and control the possible fire risk. There was no fire.  You ask why there was no one around. I explained that a staffing change was in progress and a nurse would be coming by soon. Just little things...handing you your cup of water with a straw. Well I tried to be there for you. I did a small dance for you as I was leaving that day...you had a nice big smile for me.  I`m glad I had the opportunity to settle you down and make your day better. I had used your cell phone to email your sister in Woodstock.  Glad I had brought along my charger for you to use. I never dreamed you would be taking it away with you to your celestial home. Oh well.

Oh well indeed.  As I left, I mentioned to your kindly nurse, that you were in pain. She said the medicine was on order and coming soon. "Every thing will be okay" she went on to add....."We are suppose to say that, though, we know different".  In my ignorance, I just walked away.  If I had only known, that was our final time. 

Oh well.

Jimmy, it's a day early from your passing
but lets just call this my one year anniversary, since we last talked.

I know your spirit is around.
In my mind I see you, 
Got a tissue for these tears.
Oh, what might have been. 
Guess, I`m not much good at this. 
Miss you Jimmy.

Rest in peace.

Every day I wonder about it all. Having someone like you in my world. Then for you to be taken. Even you never thought of such an ending. 

So this is your birthday...or rather would have been,
but such was not to be the case. 

You are missed Jimmy, One lone candle burns on here...
the one you left behind.

No birthday celebration, but our shared memories of better times lives on.

A priest at St. Paul's Cathedral of London, did not intend it as a poem, it was actually delivered as part of a sermon in 1910. The sermon, titled, "Death the King of Terrors" was preached while the body of King Edward VII was lying in state at Westminster.

***
***

Death Is Nothing At All
By Henry Scott-Holland more Henry Scott-Holland
Death is nothing at all.
It does not count.
I have only slipped away into the next room.
Nothing has happened.

Everything remains exactly as it was.
I am I, and you are you,
and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged.
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.

Call me by the old familiar name.
Speak of me in the easy way which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.

Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it.

Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolute and unbroken continuity.
What is this death but a negligible accident?

Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am but waiting for you, for an interval,
somewhere very near,
just round the corner.

All is well.
Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost.
One brief moment and all will be as it was before.
How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!


Thank you Eden, for suggesting these kind & thoughtful words, be added here.

Forever in our Hearts

I will forever remember the big bouquet you brought me jimmy.

The big Valentines bear, made of red roses still sits in my home, and will for ever.

We had plans, we had dreams. 
To quote you Jimmy,
you said in an email 
"Since I met you, my life, has had more meaning. Love Jimmie"