ForeverMissed
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To my guardian angel.

April 18, 2011

Not a second goes by when I don't think about you. I miss you more than words can even express. I'll never forget the birthday calls of you singing or anything about the last summer I saw you. I remember waking up to the smell of coffee and always finding you outside with a cigarette and either a cross word puzzle or your needle point work. I remember when hurricane Charlie came and we were huddled under the table. I felt so scared but knowing that I was with you made me feel a lot safer. Where ever we went everyone always knew you were my grandmother because we look so much alike. I kept all your cards and whenever I feel like I need to be closer to you, I read them. I remember playing basketball with you when you came to visit me. I remember going to Disney with you as well. Honestly, I remember everything about you & every memory we shared. I'd give anything in the world for you to be here with me now. I love you and I always and forever will.

Lady Gee <3

March 3, 2011
Meatballs and hospice
you just made sauce not even a week ago
 
"hello my baby"
 
those would be the second to last i ever hear
the ones i will forever hold dear,
for i do not wish to remember what was next
 
do you recall the coffee? best you ever had
last too
 
i held the cup to your lips, and saw the recognition in your eyes
"when did you get here?"
 
not soon enough
 
seven months prior, if i only known
 
repetitive squabble turned masacre
prey on the weak
 
to have you know if i had known the misery
in your heart,
i would have fought
for you
would always stand up
for you
 
it's hard for a Lion to lose her roar
 
i was there. why didn't you tell me?
why couldn't i see? why didn't i want to believe?  
 
ignorant 
 
and it's so hard to remain quiet now
for i know what you would want
history to repeat
sisters torn apart, 17 years of that wasn't enough?
 
i don't know if i can
 
my mind bleeds from distortion
my arms ache from the abiding tug
my heart pleads for strength
 
i reach out..
 
for your guidance
 
"goodbye my baby"

Think I wrote this 5/2008

I love and miss you every single moment of each and every day. <3

Jennie

February 27, 2011

Growing up as a young teenager I was under the impression that it was us against them(kids vs. parents). Jennie broke that barrier for me and for that I was able to communicate with my elders with trust and confidence and most of all, without apprehensions. Like leaves from a tree, we've blown in different directions but as I'm looking back at my life, I realize where my roots are. Jennie "watered my plants" without prejudice or judgement and I've never told that I love her.  I am so sorry.

I love you Jennie,

Danny Benitez

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