Years ago when our children where young, I shared with Jey, one Sunday, that I was at my wit's end to know how to deal with one son who refused to accept being part of a family; he had his own agenda which he strongly objected to having interupted for the sake of family scheduels. 
Jey listened to my anguish and then quietly urged me to leave the matter in God's hands, which I did out of desperation. 
Over time, that son became a family hero with a strong sense of purpose, an unconventional life-style, admirable ethics, self-discipline, a commitment to service, and fun to be with!   Thanks be to God, and my thanks to Jey for his wise advice!

So many good memories of Jey and Joan’s pastorate in Wethersfield come to mind from my involvement over those years on Jey’s church board and In Joan’s Caring Ministry. It’s comforting to remember that one of Jey’s favorite hymns was It is Well With My Soul. He would share so many stories of the family in his sermons that we all felt we knew the children. There was the story about helping a homeless man in Florida who had no shoes, and when Jey gave him his own and looked up at him, he saw the face of Christ. There was a time when Jey and Joan were traveling with his sister and he suffered an attack of appendicitis and had to be rushed to the hospital. Joan called the church as it was happening and WHILE we were in worship and asked for prayer for Jey from everyone, and God answered that prayer and our prayers over the succeeding days. Jey was the first pastor I’d ever known who could and would pray with you over the phone. If you called to ask for prayer, he’d say, “well, let’s pray now” and we did. He always stressed that Christ had/has a sense of humor, and he kept the picture of Christ laughing in a prominent place on his office wall. There are just so many ways that Jey enriched our lives and faith through his ministry. It left an indelible mark on our lives and community

 I have many memories of Pastor Deifell. But the best ones were very personal to me. They included the unprecedented pulpit/choir exchanges he and my Pastor from my home church (Bible Tabernacle) had after I joined First Presbyterian Church in York, PA when I got married.  Bible Tabernacle was a lively African American congregation and I don't remember what prompted that exchange but clearly I knew that Pastor Deifell could handle it...I remember him commenting on being startled at first when he heard people talk back to him while he was preaching (saying amen etc..) but he quickly got in step with the call and response preaching style (haha).  Also, the kindness and sensitivity to my wish for him to take part in both of my sons' dedications in lieu of a baptism (which he couldn't do within the Presbyterian Church) along with my home Pastor at my home church.
What a kind and gentle example of Christ your dad was as he lived out the scriptures in his everyday life. My love to the Deifell family at this time 

1) Jey became a limo driver:  It was Tony's Prom night; a nice limo was a loan from Kapok Tree owner (Bumgardner). Jey donned a fashionable cap and became quite famous for 1 night!
2) The scene was Black Mountain--Anderson Hall in Montreat to be exact.  Various summer pastors were invited to preach. We lived in Black Mountain at the time and we were excited to hear our Clearwater Pastor, Jey, declare God's Word!
3) 1983 was the year of our 25th wedding anniversary. Sue had arranged to have Jey celebrate our "big day" so many years ago. I was sick on that day; never mind--Sue and I renewed our vows anyway!!                                                        (written by Bob Hassall)

We will miss you, Jey!

Jey was my pastor and my boss at First Church of Christ in Wethersfield. He was a great encourager and a example of how to make people feel welcome and listened to. He was fun, too, even as he moved us forward with vision, which is always a blessing to have in a boss! I appreciated how he didn't hide his love for his family. It was so evident, as he talked about them often. He was proud of each of you! He especially was a great example of how to love your spouse, as he clearly loved you, Joan, so deeply!  He often spoke of his other churches and how each one was a special place for him, showing that lasting relationships were important to him. I was blessed to have Jey officiate at my wedding and share his wisdom with my husband and I as he prepared us for marriage, and for that I'm grateful.  I am so glad that Jey was a part of my life, and although I'm sad that his life on earth is done, I do look forward to seeing him in heaven someday!  Until then, I'll be praying for you, Joan, and all of you that are in his family. Hugs!

I’m finishing the last of the pecan pie that I bought for my dad the night he passed. It’s almost gone. He also loved the burn of jalapeño peppers, and I’m going to finish that too even though it hurts. Durham tried the jalapeño pepper and ran to the sink to get some water.

We filled the counter with objects to remember my dad: a cross, the bible his father gave me in 1969, stack of his sermons, red wine, radishes, jalapeño pepper, grapefruit, flounder, pecan pie with butter pecan ice cream, sharks teeth we found on Topsail Beach every summer, tennis and golf balls, paint brushes, one of the handwritten letters I would get weekly in college from my mom and dad, copy of a $25 check that he’d send me every year for Valentine’s Day, candles and pictures—lots of pictures.

I had to track down a newspaper, because he loved the news. Sometimes I think he used news to avoid the chaos of life—just like I did this week listening to election coverage. I picked up so many patterns from my dad and even more that came from rebelling against him.

Part of me still wants to hide. Then, this morning, Durham asked me to buy him another jalapeño pepper.

Loved our family times at Topsail!
Fishing, crabbing, roller skating, mini golf, flashlight tag.
Learned to Water Ski in the sound with Uncle Jey driving the boat.
Miss those times!

Trip Miller (oldest nephew on the Chapman side).