Jocelyn Carrie Stoller
  • 57 years old
  • Date of birth: Nov 2, 1958
  • Date of passing: Mar 3, 2016
Let the memory of Jocelyn be with us forever
This memorial website was created in memory of our loved one, Jocelyn Stoller, 57, born on November 2, 1958 and passed away on March 3, 2016. We will remember her forever.
Memorial Tributes
This tribute was added by Adam Ashworth on 3rd November 2017

"I miss you Jocey. Your raw goodness, your immense capacity for love, your dedication to my personal growth and that of so many others... thank you for adding so much to my life. I wish I could call you up and tell you about all the wonderful things going on in my life and how I'm donating my time to these awesome charities, and how in part your philanthropic heart is why I do so. Of the love I have in my life who I wish you could meet, and the amazing friends I've made since I last talked to you, and all the ways I've pushed out of my comfort zones. If you were here, you'd tell me how proud of me you were. Knowing that helps numb the pain of your loss. So much love I send to you, whether you exist somehow in this universe, or if you just live on in my heart."

This tribute was added by Rebecca Hamilton on 2nd November 2017

"I think about you all the time, and miss you so very much.  I have even caught myself getting ready to call you about something, and then remember that you are gone.  The world was a better place when you were here, and now it is very grey!!  I have continued to better myself, always asking, “What would Joce say to me”.  I wish you were here, but I know you have left a mark on this world and on me!!  Love you forever!!"

This tribute was added by Elaine Siegel on 2nd November 2017

"You pierce my heart Joce-y girl with your eternal beauty, brains, generosity, goodness, joie de vivre... I love you and miss you terribly.  I hope the "other side" is everything you hoped it could be.  xoxoxoxoxox EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"

This tribute was added by Elaine Siegel on 2nd November 2017

"March 13, 2016
I've known Jocelyn Stoller since she was 16 years old.  From that moment on she had my heart.  A beautiful, sensuous, passionate girl.. who loved to dance, to sing, to act, to create stories to tell little children.. a lover of life.. who knew that normal high school was not for her.  It would not teach her what she wanted to know.  And that was rationale enough for her to break free, like a bull in a china shop, leave her family and friends and everything she knew, to travel the world.

So at 17 she did just that.. and by herself.  Juxtapose this stunning, magical girl, enchanting everyone she met who, from every outward appearance could have been on the cover of Vogue without even a touch-up to speak of, with a mind that absorbed and remembered everything.. smart, articulate, curious, inquisitive, a scholar in the making, and a nexus, drawing in every every human being, every experience, every dog and cat, the original networker.  In fact she gave networking its definition.

For Jocelyn, high school would have been a waste of precious time, but traveling the world with purpose would be everything to her.  She was already well equipped with dreams and aspirations far beyond her years that would take her around the world for adventures we can't even imagine.  And so it was - a beginning to a life of involvement and commitment.  A big involvement envisioning how to make the world a better place, learning and reading everything she could about medicine, world cultures, religions, psychology, metaphysics, spirituality, and with her scholarly pursuits well integrated, going about creating projects in Russia, in Africa, for classrooms, for medical institutions...

I never met a more selfless, generous person.  For Jocelyn, asking how you are was not a perfunctory exercise.  She really wanted to know.  So you told her and wisdom poured forth.. always focusing on the other, never herself.  And for her valued friends, colleagues, clients she would launch them into new and evolved ways of going at their lives and creative pursuits.. always ever expanding her world and theirs, and reaching far into places that needed her.

Jocelyn's presence was always larger than life, even as a young girl.  Always way ahead of her time she thought big and encompassed and embraced the world.

Jocelyn helped us all to find our way.  She left us way too soon and is deeply, profoundly missed."

This tribute was added by Pamela Nissley on 2nd November 2017

"Happy Birthday dear sister. Love Pammy"

This tribute was added by Judith King-Calnek on 2nd November 2017

"I think of Jocelyn twice a day, at 11:11 a.m. and p.m. as she once told me those were her special hours (we were teenagers then).  I thought of Jocelyn last week when I visited San Francisco and passed Broderick Street.  I think of Jocelyn today.  Always with great love and affection and at times she sends me laughter as well.  Always."

This tribute was added by Jeff Bell on 2nd November 2017

"Stardust in my eyes, I glimpse her thru these ages. Ageless in my mind. Forever Jocelyn..."

This tribute was added by Mardi Kendall on 2nd November 2017

"Her birthday again... I still miss her as much as ever. My dear friend."

This tribute was added by Ginger Ashworth on 2nd November 2017

"Today is the anniversary of Jocelyn's birth. November 2nd. A Scorpio through and through. Oh, how she would have loved to see my grandchildren's Halloween antics on Tuesday, how grownup the 17-year-old looks, how fun the 8-year-old twins (a Zombie Girl, and an Amazon Package [don't ask]) act in their Halloween personalities. Osha and I were just talking about you yesterday, and here it is, your birthday. I hope you are at peace, Jocy."

This tribute was added by Mardi Kendall on 4th March 2017

"I miss Jocelyn now as much as I did one year ago. I think of her with love everyday. I'm only now getting used to being without her - but it is a long process. Wherever you are Jocie, if you're somewhere, know that I'm with you."

This tribute was added by Pamela Nissley on 4th March 2017

"365 days. Thinking of you with love."

This tribute was added by Amy Hersh on 3rd March 2017

"After my junior year of high school I went to CA to visit you all. I spent a couple days staying with Jocelyn. We had pizza and (my first glass of) wine at a restaurant one night for dinner - that was so cool. I accompanied her to her martial arts lesson in a park with a world renowned teacher. We talked so much. This time with Jocelyn is really my only memory of her except for a few phone conversations later on. I'm grateful for it. It was such a special time with my cousin."

This tribute was added by Jeff Bell on 2nd November 2016

"God Bless You Jocelyn - """Singing with The Angels""..."

This tribute was added by Mardi Kendall on 2nd November 2016

"We had a ritual. She would always call me on my birthday (Oct 24) and talk and I would call her, no matter where we were in the world. A normal ritual among friends. But a longstanding one that I miss this year. Like a big hole in the universe. Thinking of you Joce. Always. I miss you more than words can say."

This tribute was added by Pamela Nissley on 2nd November 2016

"Happy Birthday sweetie, xo Pammy"

This tribute was added by Rebecca Hamilton on 15th April 2016

"Joce was there for me when I was in a very dark time in my life.  We became close, and I consider her one of my close friends!!  The world will not be the same without her, and I miss her very much!!  Love you always!!"

This tribute was added by Mimi Perrin on 26th March 2016

"Jocelyn was my very best friend from second grade through 7th grade, and then I moved away.  We were inseparable during that time in our lives.   She was such an incredibly brilliant and unique individual.   I still can't believe she's gone.  I will always love and miss you Joce.     Mimi"

This tribute was added by Lee Kravitz on 24th March 2016

"When I met Jocelyn, I was working as a bartender at a Greek restaurant in Cleveland. I was 25; she was maybe 20. She came into the bar one night with her mother Phyllis. When Phyllis excused herself to make a phone call, Jocelyn told me that she had done astrological charts for healers and holy men and that she’d love to do mine.  
     If Jocelyn had been drinking anything more than water, I might have dismissed her as being a New Age poseur. But she gave off a different vibe. Everything about her -- her red dress, black hair, alabaster skin, red lipstick; the way her womanly self-confidence contrasted with her girlish giggle; her joyful exuberance -- suggested that she might have something intriguing to say — and she did.
More than 30 years later I still find myself listening to the four hours of tapes Jocelyn made to explain my natal chart, and I use them to map out and understand my life. Back then she told me, ”If you get over your pride and delusions you have potential to be intuitive and spiritual some day.” During my career as an editor and media executive, we fell out of touch. But when we reconnected in 2012, I was writing a book about the midlife spiritual search she had put forth three decades earlier as a possibility for me.
When I told her what I was doing, Jocelyn offered to provide an “intellectual context” for whatever I was experiencing and warned me about the “mental assumptions and cognitive biases” I might be bringing to my spiritual search: how they could cloud my perceptions and hold me back. By then, Jocelyn had become a scholar versed in belief formation and the human search for meaning — and put at my disposal the huge interdisciplinary database she had compiled of books, articles, and research studies in the fields of psychology, anthropology, and systems theory.
Over the next two years, we tried to talk at least every other week. Sometimes she told me about people she helped who had grown up in rigidly fundamentalist households. Jocelyn was astutely aware of the damage that could be caused by charismatic leaders and by authoritarian religious groups that required unquestioning obedience from their members. She was also expert in a variety of mindfulness and self-awareness techniques that helped me process my emotions and move me ahead in my journey.
The next-to-last chapter of my book PILGRIM tells the story of my friendship and working relationship with Jocelyn. It’s called “Empathy’s Children” and reflects Jocelyn’s deepest hope: that we reorient society and the education system to help children become more empathetic, curious, and self-aware. When one of my own children was experiencing the injustices and absurdities of high school, Jocelyn reached out to him in a correspondence that lasted several months. She encouraged him to follow his passions and to not be constrained by the study of any one subject or discipline. Ben is almost the same age Jocelyn was when I met her. As part of Jocelyn’s legacy, my 19-year-old son will hear her wise and encouraging voice in his head, and feel it in his heart, as he navigates his own journey into the future. What a gift — to me and my son, but also to the world! I am consoled by my certainty that Jocelyn’s spirit and example will live on in the heads and hearts of those who knew and loved her, and that we will carry the values she championed forward."

This tribute was added by hank frisch on 22nd March 2016

"I went to high school with Jocelyn.  We were in in the play Alice in Wonderland.  Jocelyn was alice, she was all but 15,  she was beautiful,  confident and was a a shining star. That she will always be. Jocelyn the world will be dimmer without you."

This tribute was added by Dana Ullman on 21st March 2016

"I remember when Jocelyn first moved to the San Francisco Bay Area.  She was so full of that youthful enthusiasm that brimmed over.  And she was so honored to make so many of her personal heroes, not always knowing that these heroes were honoring her and basting in her intelligence and beauty.  

Jocelyn's passing is another reminder to me to NEVER delay reconnecting with old friends.  It has been a long time since I had personal time with Jocelyn...and I regret not making that call and making that reconnection."

This tribute was added by Judith King-Calnek on 21st March 2016

"To my dearest Jocelyn.  You are ever present.  You are eternal.  Love.  Light.  Radiance.  Truth."

This tribute was added by Tiziana DellaRovere on 21st March 2016

"To a beautiful woman, with a brilliant mind and a loving heart who made this world a better place with her presence. May you be enfolded in Divine Love."

This tribute was added by Stanley Krippner on 18th March 2016

"Jocelyn was a truly original thinker. She delighted in sharing her historical and theoretical graphs and articles with me.  In fact, they should be placed on this memorial website!"

This tribute was added by John Wilkins on 15th March 2016

"Joce was a great friend and a never ending source of encouragement and information. Vale my friend"

This tribute was added by Pamela Nissley on 12th March 2016

"Hi Joc. Yes, you know it's me because I never spelled Joc with an "e".  It's my birthday today and I'm thinking about you at my birthday party in 4th grade. We were inseparable during those years and for many afterward. We are in your basement theater, putting on a play with sets and costumes and a real curtain.  We are driving in your fabulous red Mustang to Chautaqua, just the two of us feeling so grown up at 18. We are going to see "Star Wars" in 1977 at the insistence of our little brothers. We are going to modern dance together in our black leotards. We are sitting at the piano in Shaker singing Janice Ian and Carol King and Joni Mitchell songs. We are waiting for the school bus in 2nd grade. We are 26 years old in San Francisco, reconnecting at your house in the Sunset. We are going to see Hall and Oats at Blossom. We are working late into the night on Information Moscow. We are watching the Monkees on TV. We are in each other's hearts and souls. My dear sister, my love for you is eternal. Thank you for everything."

This tribute was added by Ginger Ashworth on 10th March 2016

"rest in peace, Jocy"

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This memorial is administered by:

Adam Ashworth
G. Stoller
Mardi Kendall
Scott Murray


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