This memorial website was created in memory of our loved one, John Gracy, 50, born on October 12, 1966 and passed away on January 10, 2017. We are devastated by the loss of such a beautiful soul.
Jennifer Candotti, John's sister
Doris Gracy, John's mother
Tributes
Leave a tributeMy heart still aches for you, my son.
The tears still fall each day.
The kaleidoscope that was my life
Has turned to shades of gray.
My heart still aches for memories past
And my dreams for you I’ll never see,
But my heart will always hold secure
The boundless love you gave yo me.
At the end of the event, the following beautiful eulogy was delivered by John's friend, Dylan Osborne.
John "Suntiger" Gracy
Every now and then in this thing called life, we come across a person that we feel an instant connection to, someone you feel as though you have known forever. Call it a kindred spirit, a synchronized partner in crime, call it what you will, but the day that I had my first conversation with John Suntiger, I immediately tuned right into him. It was love at first laugh.
So many times, so many fun times spent with John throughout the years are gems in my mind that I will forever hold onto and hang onto and cherish. The places that he's taken me, the things that he showed me in those places. Sometimes words just fall short, but I'm gonna do my best to come up with a tribute that would make John smile.
My friend, my brother, my teacher--a cut above the rest. John left this mortal coil in much the same fashion that he lived his life--on his own terms. Life, little more than a spiritual schoolhouse maybe--a place to learn, a place to study, a place to grow, and yet, so very much more. John shined his light on our community, literally and figuratively, for some of the greatest years, finest moments of our lives, making each second richer, fuller, and just plain awesome simply with his presence. Kick back, smiling, hat pulled down. Even now in his physical absence, his light still shines brilliantly through the sadness and loss of each of us who had the privilege of knowing him. We are all forever changed by the solid, unwavering spirit that he embodied. He was a beacon of love within our loving community, a brother of mine, within a family of like-minded brothers and sisters. The walking, talking, laughing, dancing, shining personification of love itself. That's who he was. That's who he is now. Leaving this physical realm. Timeless. Infinite. Back up into the whole of everything, his spirit sailing through the cosmos.
John was a well of knowledge, a beacon of insight, and a master of good conversation. A dull word I never heard pass through his lips. When he spoke, it burned a hole straight through all the bullshit, through all ego and all fear, and got right down to the heart of things. Injustice trembled in the presence of his logic, and all things genuine and pure were immediately finer in his company.
John had a way of recognizing the pain, insecurity, and uncertainty in others, and whether knowingly or not, comforted them with exactly what needed to be heard at precisely the right moment and presented in the perfect context that each situation demanded. This wasn't just because John understood the trials and joys of others--he literally felt them and shared them.
As I sit here thinking of John a flood of memories come rolling in. I see him on stage. It's a bright, sunny Thursday morning in West Virginia. The festival is kicking off--that familiar frenzy of red, yellow, blue, and green tents and canopies popping up--cars pulling in. John hops off the ladder and rushes back stage in a flash. He is back in 3 seconds with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth, and back up the ladder he goes. He's hanging a huge, white owl above the center of the stage to light up with his visuals once the sun goes down. It looks amazing--and it's not even dark yet--no lights--not yet--just that owl. Wings stretched, eyes wide, that owl that he designed, that he cut, that he put together, that he brought right here for all of us to see.
To call John an old soul is like accusing the sky of being big. You could just tell this wasn't his first time around this place. I only recently learned that John was 50 years old--50 years. He didn't show it. That's half a century. A half century of ups and downs, lessons learned, battles fought, sparks struck, and fires lit. And the fires he lit were many. They dot the festival grounds of our memories and light up the foggy twilight of this new dawn that we all must face without him.
It's up to each of us now to carry on for him, to be the bearers of his torch, the keepers of his flame, the heirs to that magnificent love and light that he shared with all of us all so graciously.
John loved words. Some of the last words he sent my way are even more powerful now in his absence:
"I'm gonna continue to believe in the impracticality that love exists in everyone's locality. Seek that out, and embolden it. I'm with you in spirit..."
And he most certainly is and always will be. So long, Brother. We love you!
"John was the son of my long time high school friend, Doris. The last time I saw John was at Doris' birthday celebration in 2010. She has been such a comfort and support for me during my husband's long term illness and passing recently. She spoke of John frequently during this time. Doris and I have shared many losses during our journey but the loss of a child is unimaginable. My heart aches for Doris and Jenny. May family and friends give them comfort and our Heavenly father give them peace.
My love to you. Martha"
you everyday since you left may all the angels be with you on
your journey❤❤❤
-C.J.
May your angelic spirit be with us all as we continue our journeys.
Tracy
Leave a Tribute
I met John back in 1985 and fell in love with him instantly. He was 19 years old and I was 21. We were so young and in those days, everyone hung out at the clubs and danced the night away. Everyone loved him ... of course he was the cutest guy we had every seen and was very nice and caring to boot. I even lived with him and his mom for a year. When we split in 1989 I was crushed but it was obvious to the both of us that it wasn't meant to be.
John shared some wonderful things with me later on in our relationship ... horseback riding, hang gliding, rock climbing and riding in a glider plane. He loved the outdoors.
I did not know about his health getting so bad and am so glad he had friends and family to help him both physically, mentally and spiritually. I did not know the John in the 2000's and wish I had.
I am very sad that we stopped staying in touch. There is nothing more heartbreaking to search for someone with the intent to find out how they are doing and find out they passed away. I will love him always. He will always be in my thoughts when I hear Nights in White Satin by the Moody Blues.
A Mother's Perspective
John and His Mother, Doris. 1990
(Shared first by Doris Gracy on 01/14/2017)
As John's mother, I would like the world to know of the profound love that John and I shared, that will live on in my heart forever. Even when he was a toddler, I still remember the day when I was sitting on the floor with him, and he walked over to me, hugged me, and said, " I uv ooh, Mutter. I 'ike oor bwoo eyes." Neither of us ever had to doubt that love.
Another special moment I remember was many years later when I had surgery for colon cancer. He was holding my hand when I went into the operating room. And hours later, when I awoke in the recovery room, he was still holding my hand, as if he never had let go.
And through all the struggles he had to endure in life, he never let go of the strong bond between us. He was always there if I needed him. There was a real depth to our relationship, and a real depth to the spiritual values we shared that we so easily could discuss and ponder.
John had so many good qualities that I could write about--his brilliant mind, his creativity, his empathy and generosity, his kindness, and his witty remarks--but most of all, there was the love we shared. And even though there is now a deep, dark, empty hole in my heart, the love is still there, where it will remain forever.
The last time I saw John was on Christmas Day, when he came to have Christmas dinner with me. The last words he spoke to me on that day, after he hugged and kissed me goodbye, were, "I love you, Mamma," a name he called me when he was feeling especially affectionate.
John's Speech at his Sister's Wedding. 1997
To find one’s place in this world?
To find one’s calling?
To find one’s life passion?
Do we not all seek to find these things?
I say YES!; if not for anyone else, I say it is true for me!
Then, if so….and we find “THE” person we love,
Do we not all seek to find someone with whom to share this inner calling?
In truth, after a long and weary search, we may find our Love.
I have in my life!
I indeed have found it in my life!
One of the most bold and courageous steps you can make in this life is this!
To intertwine two lives together in LOVE!
To make music you need to create a chord!
We all search for the perfect chord, a lost chord…..
This Chord is, a perfect combination of notes….
A chord, nothing on its own, but.
Combine with love, and it is the most majestic symphony of all!
In this life you can listen to this concert on your own, if you so choose!--
“The Concert Of Life”
Pleasing to the ear…
Pleasing to the eye…
Pleasing to the mind…
Pleasing to the heart…
Pleasing to the soul…
But, if you hear life’s rich song and find yourself alone,
You will pray for deliverance from this kind of solitude.
Because in Love you wish only to SHARE…
In love, you only wish to give the beauty you find in life to another.
For, if you can’t give of yourself and the beauty you find, you will feel incomplete
When you share your entire being with another,
To be able to share all of this in total love.
All beauty is for NOT unless you can give of yourself.
This total love is to be able to grasp the hand of God!
In this holy union, when two people hold God’s hand as one,
It creates more than the two notes of the chord.The chord becomes one and is harmonious with life’s symphony.
We learn more than just what is an individual--
We learn the greater lesson….
We learn how to become students….
We learn how to become teachers….
We learn how to become closer to the spirit….
We learn what our place in the world truly is…We learn our calling…
We find our passion….
We find the lost chord—LOVE.
These are my thoughts as far as a comparatively small part of life goes; I give them to my Sister and to her new Husband. I pondered how to express my feelings to my Sister over the last few months--it somehow echoed the many years in which I never expressed all of my love to her, because of youth and life’s little circumstances. SO NOW THAT I SHALL HAVE ALL HER ATTENTION ON THIS THE MOST IMPORTANT DAY OF HER LIFE!!!!, I would like to take this opportunity to DECLARE AND EXPRESS my great admiration of her; my heart could not contain anymore love for her; my heart would surely burst should I love her anymore. And it is my solemn wish that you take all the love that I have tried to place in these words I have and place it in both of your hearts. This advice I give to my new brother and to my little sister!
I am sad today for I have lost my little sister.
I am glad today for my sister has grown up.
I am glad today for I have a new brother.
I am glad today for now I may become an Uncle.
I am glad today for now I can always offer my help.
I am glad today for my sister and her new husband.
My heart has become light and roams the sky--
It soars like the eagle for your happiness.
I love you, Jenny. Fabio.