Mi querido amor:
Today I celebrate my love for you. It's hard to believe it's been a year since you "got your wings to heaven." You and I shared our 43rd anniversary a few weeks ago at Mariana Butte...did you enjoy? I had my first birdie on the 10th hole...nice, huh?
This has been quite a year...gigantic struggles and challenges for all of us...much more emotionally draining than I ever imagined or anticipated it would be. Our last days together weren't quite what we had hoped for. So many times in our youth we talked about travel, golf with Ed and Judy. Unfortunately we were never able to realize those dreams...however, we did grow old together!!!
My heart is flooded by a multitude of beautiful memories with places, songs, things said, special people we knew. There's not a day that passes without my thinking of our lives together...what memories...the good and the ones we would probably choose to forget were you still here. We had a good, full life together and sometimes it is those memories that are the most difficult at times for me to overcome for they make me miss you all the more.
Life without you has been extremely difficult but life without you is the "new normal." Far too often the world is so empty without you. I've had to learn a lot of "new normals" and it has not been easy for any of us...we must choose to go forward as we gain the strength that only comes from Christ Himself.
There were far too many days when I would have to make a concerted effort to peel myself out of bed. Despair...it's a hopeless emotion and the devil will do anything he can to keep us there. BUT FOR GOD!!!
You were always my main advocate and support in life and now God has placed many loving, wonderful friends and familly in your stead and He gives me the strength to care for our children and grandchildren.
Our kids miss you terribly too. Your mouse talks about "her hero" at every turn...Chris wrote you a wonderful Father's Day love letter...hope you had a chance to read it. We shared so many beautiful memories with our kids and grandkids and families...we were blessed.
I miss your many magnificent qualities but most of all I think I miss your strength and support, your wisdom and courage. You were truly my "man of valor" in every sense of the word...so fearless, and I refuse to allow you to be defined by your last days of Parkinson's because the devil is the liar of all liars and only in God do we have the victory.
I know in my heart of hearts you are where you should be, mi amor...Face-to-Face with our Jesus, in all His Splendor and Glory, and I am anxious to join you. I know you will greet me with open arms and we will walk hand-in-hand, side-by-side together as we await our children and all our loved ones after us. Your cunado says "I only have one cunado forever" and you're it, baby, in more ways than one. I will forever miss you in my heart.
Te amo con todo mi corazon