another family reunion this time without you and your happy go lucky face.no matter what happened good or bad you always had a smile,sometimes sarcastic but at least it was you smileing.as i look at your daughter everything about her is you,she is so bright smart and a very happy baby always smileing .she is getting so big soon heaven will be 15 months shes growing fast.spongebob is her favorite cartoon i know if you were here you and her would be watching spongebob all day long b/c she does that now.i know u are looking down on us sometimes i can feel you here,heaven also.she knows you she sees ur pic everyday she knows you are her daddy...we all love and miss you...

this is heaven my nana/mama is typing for me.we never got to meet but i just wanted to tell you a little about myself just to let u know how im doing things that i have done.im 13 months now,started walking at 9 months and talking.i see your picture everyday i have learned to know who you are and i get to walk with you as i carry your picture with me.every morning i kiss your picture and say dada.someday my mama/nana will tell me all about you.i have lots of people that care and love me.when im older i will beable to write on here myself.my mama lets me get on the laptop we listen to Barney songs together,we watch lion king together and spongebob i know that cartoon was your favorite.we have you on the desk all over the walls sometimes i take your picture to bed with me,feel safe with you near me.well daddy i will write more my momma will write for me.i love you daddy.

I went to school with Jonathan. He was cool to talk to and thay all so was my naber well we was kids and we all hade good time to gether. He allway can make you :) know mater what was going on. I go to westfiel on the week ends and all i think of is see you and my brother Jimmy :( I miss them day

i remember when u were little hanging on the fence yelling for audrey,that fence always got you out a few times you snuck over to grandmas your aunt joan never seen u come in u would go upstairs to grandmas room eat her grapes then take a nap with her,i always knew where to find you and u were 3 then.use to tease you by saying you were born in the cabbage patch lol you would believe me for a day you would ask ur dad all day finally i would tell you that you wernt ,and you would put such a big smile on ur face..more memories ill write later.you just dont know how much you are missed.

What up Jon-Boy. You know i think about you everyday man. I wrote this song about you and the rest of the people i know who died. Shit was crazy man, always was, always will be. The day you died pierced a whole in my heart bro. The days leading up to your death, the way you fell, was fucking sad man. I watched it happen. This month was the year anniversary of Matt Kulpa too. I cant believe its been almost 18 months since you died. Anyways, I tell a story about you. You were my hero growing up. Me and you were family man, my mom almost got with your dad, you'd always tell that story to me too. Id see you on the street and you'd walk up and be like "yea this is my little brother Nick, my dad hooked up with his mom" and then you'd laugh. I remember being like 12 years old, and i went over you your place on pearl street. That last house on the left that is like condemed or some shit like that. lol. Figures its condemed after your ass lives in it. But anyways, we were drinking moonshine outta martini glasses. I dont know where the hell you got that shit but that shit rocked me. We all heated them up for like 3 minutes in the nuker, and then slammed them. I was puking like crazy on the back porch like all night. Then we lit them on fire and slammed some more. But that was just us being who we were man. Fuck what everyone else says ya know. We lived life to the fullest. I know you did. Im just really sad cause i know you woulda got it eventually, you woulda made something outta yourself. Just like Tylor, motherfucker died when he was 17 years old man. But thats the streets ya know. Some people die young, thats just the lifestyle. But i loved you man. Theres not a doubt about that. I know we fell off for alittle bit. I went one way and you went the other, but we met in the middle right before you died and i was happy with that. Just being able to see you again and get over the shit. And my sister always had hope in you man, she was your rock bro. I know you loved my sister, more the the whole wide world. And i loved you for that too man. You were a big teddy bear, and you didnt need to act tough cause you already were ya know. I miss you man. Your my brother. Ill always know that in my heart. Its just really sad, its all just really fucking unfortunate man. Here are the lyrics to my song, i havent recorded it yet but i will and put it on here:

Trials and Tribulations-

Im standing in the shadows where all my dead friends are, they greet me with their sadness of my mistakes and scars. They say "what the hell are you doing? trying to be something your not", and i say, man im just living must be you all forgot.

My wall is filled with pictures of the memories we all shared. Our times were just beginning it shows we never cared, about those tunes that they kept playing be careful of those blues. Drugs we all kept taking cause life was outta tune. And now your all just pictures, shining on my wall. Creatures in my sadness. Waiting for my fall.

Chorus:

And were all just sitting here trying to do our best. All these trials and tribulations that put us to the test. Were all living, loving, learning, trying to do our best. But these trials and tribulations put some to their rests.

This song is for the people who didnt make it out alive. Lives became unmanagable and they didnt survive. Now their in the ground, dont speak no sounds, their just souls floating through the clouds. Said, their in the ground dont speak no sounds, just souls floating through the clouds.

Before i got a chance to recover, there goes another, now im wondering... who's next, yeah, Who's Next? ........and it aint gonna be me!

Thats the song bro, but im sure you've already heard it. I play it all the time. I love you brotha. I know your watching over me. I know you got my back still. Your just with me in spirit, and its free man. Your free. Ill miss you. Rest In Peace, Forever and Ever. See you in the afterlife brotha.               

Much love and respect to my boy,

                                          Nick

My funniest memory of you is the day you got that piece of crap motorcycle. You thought it was the best thing that happened to you. My mom kept telling you not to drive it cause you'll hurt your "big ss" is her exact words. lol but you did and she followed you all the way to Ripley. I think it's safe to say that was your first time on a bike cause watching you try to drive that thing was beyond hilarious. The best part about it all was your ass crack hanging out the entire time haha all me and mom could think of was " God please don't let a cop come up behind him hahaha" You failed to mention that it had absolutly no brakes on it and you ended up driving right through someones back yard. I don't think it would've mattered to you if you wrecked it or if anything else happened, you had the biggest smile on your face that I've ever seen... I look at it as a symbol. That bike was a horrible idea to take riding around, but you did it cause you wanted to feel free and it didn't matter what stupid thing you did, you could always look behind you and see your family standing (or in this case, driving) not far behind you. Cause we believed in you, we always have, always will whether your here or in Heaven. Which ironically is another symbol. Not only did you go to Heaven but you left us with a beautiful piece of Heaven. <3 I know you see her, cause she sees you. and i see you, i see you in her everyday and we couldn't have asked for a more perfect, beautiful, smart and hilarious baby girl. Thank you for being there unconditionally, and i promise i'll be there for Heaven, think and thin, days & nights, no matter what. Thank you for filling our lives with laughter. Thank you for Heaven. & most of all thank you, for looking down on us and being there when we need you the most. When we need sunshine, or we need a breeze or when we need a smile from you that shines through when your daughter smiles.

I love you.<3 Always & Forever, and believe me when i say there is no way you will ever ever be forgotten.

You faced the world with a beautiful grin that nobody will ever possibly be able to forget.  Keep smiling angel.

Love Lives on:

i reached for you this morning
woke up with empty arms
once again it's sinking in
how far away you are
i still pour two cups of coffee
and tell you all about my dreams
this kitchen's way to quiet
you should still be here with me

and even though i cry like crazy
even though it hurts so bad
i'm thankful for the time god gave me
even though we couldn't make it last
i'm learning how to live without you
even though i don't want to
and even with you gone love lives on

i still call your mom on sunday
it's good to hear her voice
she always tells me that same story
about her stubborn little boy
and i kept your favorite tshirt
you know the one i used to hate
ain't it funny how it's the one thing now
i just can't throw away

and even though i cry like crazy
even though it hurts so bad
i'm thankful for the time god gave me
even though we couldn't make it last
i'm learning how to live without you
even though i don't want to
and even with you gone love lives on

she comes with me on your birthday
little flowers in her hands
she's always known there's something missing
but to young to understand
and someday she's going to ask me
what kind of man you were
i'll tell her all the ways i loved you
and all of you i see in her

and even though i cry like crazy
even though it hurts so bad
i'm thankful for the love god gave me
and she's the perfect way to make it last
learning how to live without you
baby i don't want you to
but even with you gone
love lives on yeah