Everybody was burning up in their costumes, everybody except Jonathan, he was the only one of my sister's kids who kept their costume on during the whole time at St. Thomas. Those were the days, Jj was absolutely the cutest Tele Tubby. What a memory, what great little kid. Jj auntie nene, miss you more and more. So happy you have your wings and we will see you all again. Love and miss you still. 

HAPPY FATHERS DAY

If I were there…

I would personally tell you about my dad…an awesome man of God.  I would tell you that I know this Father’s Day will be difficult for him, but I know being the man that he is, he’ll get through this too.

 If I were there…

I would tell you about this hard working man that does everything he can for his family.  My family’s schedule centered around me, making sure everything was taken care of, such as picking me up from school, making all my appointments, after school programs, etc.  You see my Dad work nights, but he made sure he was home every morning in time to take me to school.  Those morning drives took about 20 minutes and those were the best 20 minutes of my day.  My dad had a unique way of explaining things and often repeating himself.  He would give his fatherly advice with wisdom on his no nonsense approach to everything in life (hint: Bengal tigers and the 3rd rail…lol).  His talks were positive, inspiring and very funny.  He was like Bill Cosby (only without the sweater)…those never ending stories of when he was my age (I’m sure you could imagine…lol).  I didn’t mind hearing those stories over and over again.  I would patiently listen, raise a quizzical eyebrow and nod in agreement.   He should have been a comedian, because he could turn any situation around with humor and his philosophical opinion on everything…there was never a dull moment in our home…thanks Dad!

I see the notes he writes on the calendar above my desk in my room, thanking God for me and expressing how much he loves and misses me.  I miss him, too.  I appreciate how often he thinks of me and the items that he purchases and place on my bed (it’s getting a little crowded), those things he knows I would like… and how loud and expressive he would say my nickname, J Jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay, my man!...thanks Dad!  

If I were there…

I would do on this Father’s Day what we do every Father’s Day, give him my card and gift, a big manly hug, take him to breakfast and go to church…the rest of the day was his.  He needs his rest.  Amen!  Father’s Day (just like Mother’s Day) should be celebrated every day.  I appreciated all you did and love you for it.  I thank God for you, Dad.  Of all the dad’s in this world, God gave me you.  Mom tells everyone of her Angel…know that I am always by your side, with my hand resting on your shoulder…and forever in your heart.

Until I see you in Glory…Love you,

 Jonathan

My nephew was an exceptional young man, never complained, always Mr. Goody Too Shoes.  I don't think Jonathan ever got a whipping, he just couldn't.  When I think of his life, I often wondered just how blessed we were to have him in our lives.  We could have lost him years ago when he was little, but we didn't, God had a plan for his life as he does with us all.  His plans are absolute and final in this world, but thank God for everlasting, eternal life with Jesus Christ is FOREVER!  I can't imagine what it would be like, but thank God we will see Jesus Christ, my Jj again, along with J and our family and friends again.  So for now, I will hold on to my precious memories Jj.  Love and miss you still.  Auntie Nene!  

They say women who wear hats that cover the faces are mysterious.  This hat I wore for Mother's Day this year had nothing to do with mystery, I just like wearing hats on special days like Easter and this day. Underneath that wide brim were sad eyes that helped shield my hurt that my baby wasn't here on this special day.  

When I look back on past Mother's Days, I can remember how awesome they were...the pictures and special cards from the kids.  I miss JJ's hug...sincere, typical of a young man his age.  I miss him so much.  He never forgot my birthday or Mother's Day. He would be the first to greet me...every time.  This year's dinner was different, still laughter, but there was an empty seat.  It will never be the same.  I can't thank God enough for JJ.

Also, Jonathan knew nothing about fashion, and probably would have thought the hat was funny.

Well we completed the walk and roll...

   I have never participated in any of the support group efforts such as this, (my first) and I can say I had a good time.  It was cold and I did freeze my tush off, but it was worth it.  My mind told me I could complete the 15k (9.3 miles, I think) bike route with no problem, but my body told me otherwise.  The pain I experienced afterward…I should have taken the Aleve before we rode.  I did eventually cross the finish line (last…because at 29th street Thomas and I got off the bikes and walked the rest of the way...thank you Tommy).  Darrell, aka Lance Armstrong (without steriods), left us in the dust with his super bike. I wanted to file a police report and charge the “hawk” with brutality for the beatdown of the wind off the lake that beat us up…it kicked my butt  and I took it personal (lol). But, I know I had to take my beating like a true Chicagoan…or postal worker (come rain, sleet, snow, wind…whatever!)  Ouch!!! 

On the brighter side, I could not have gotten through this day without the support of my husband, Darrell and my son, Thomas.  Who were the same two people along with Jonathan (Alexis in spirit and my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ) who helped me through this breast cancer journey in their own unique and special way…laughter.  I had my own Second City, Laugh In (for older folks who remember), In Living Color and Saturday Night Live in my own home through process…no charge.  

Another bike outing.  Miss you JJ...I know we would have had so much fun.

Love, Mom     

On Saturday, April 26, 2014 (Darrell's birthday), he, Thomas and myself will participate in the American Cancer Society Walk and Roll Fundraiser at Soldier Field.  Instead of walking or roller blading, we've decided to ride our bikes for the 15k route.

I remember when we decided as a family to go for a bike ride on a Saturdary afternoon.  We didn't have the van at the time, so we had to attach three bikes (Darrell, Alexis and mine) to the bike rack on my Volkswagon and one bike in the trunk (that car was amazing).   No bike for Jonathan.  He was a little guy who had to ride in the child seat attached to Darrell's bike.  

Our bike outing began at 35th street and ended at Navy Pier and back again.  What a ride!  We rode from 35th to Navy Pier, parked the bikes outside of McDonalds, went in to eat and headed back to the car.  We all slept good that night. 

The funny part of this story is Jonathan's competitive nature, even as a little guy.  You see, Thomas would not ride with the family.  He was a daredevil and would ride as fast as he could, get as far ahead as he could, and would then have to stop and wait for us to catch him (after Darrell yelled for him to stop).  Jonathan didn't like that.  He wanted to be a part of the action...he wanted to ride along side Thomas because I'm sure he felt he could have kept up with him or beat him.  Well, unfortunate for Jonathan he didn't have power of the peddle...he was at the mercy of his Dad.  His poking and nudging for Darrell to ride faster..."catch him, Dad," didn't work.   His frustration and the look on his face was priceless.  To Jonathan...Dad was no Lance Armstrong.

I know if he were here he would partcipate with us.  I am a breast cancer survivor and he was instrumental in my recovery.  I love and miss him so much.


Mom  

  

  

Just the other day I was watching TV and one of Jonathan's favorite movies came on, 'Real Steel.'  I use to tease Jonathan how he reminded me of the character robot, Atom.  How the similarity of their personalities were spot on.  They both were the strong, silent type who persevered and never gave up.  They even walked the same way.  Too funny!

He also enjoyed the claymation movie, 'Chicken Run.'  If you haven't seen it, it is hilarious.  It is about chickens who think they can fly and are trying desparately to escape a chicken coupe.  This movie, The Lion King, Toy Story (all of them) were what I would call "repeaters."  Jonathan would watch these movies over and over and over and over and over, again.

What I will miss most, was his sense of humor....and how much we both like watching "O Brother Where Art Thou, '(my favorite) and 'Wild Hogs,' (his favorite) just to name a few.  Just to see any of these movies in the TV listings for a particular month, a dvd or a vhs tape (yes, vhs...I still have them), brings back sweet memories of the times when Jonathan and I would hang out and watch one of them.  It's just not the same without my buddy!

As you can see from some of the pictures, Jonathan was not shy at all.  He allowed me to make some truly hilarious costumes for him.  Teletubby...Bob the Builder...Woody (Toy Story), a cowboy, samurai warrior.  Too funny!  It was as much fun from me as it was for him.

He never complained.  He enjoyed life...enjoyed being a kid.  I loved his spirit.  It was easy being his Mom!  We had some good times.  Unforgettable!

The pictures keep our memories of Jonathan close to our hearts.  There was never a dull moment in the McCoy household.

Jj, Auntie Nene do not have the heart to go to your games at school.  I look at your pictures of you at Hales and the tears just fall, I miss my nephew and I miss going to your games.  It was really important to me that I try and make your games.  I know how I was there for all of Alexis, basketball and tennis and whatever Thomas was doing, but I'm glad I was there, I was so proud of you, your were a good manager, so cool.  I guess it's the kid in me, going to games and eating, those horrible, but good hot dogs and junk food. They never really have anything healthy, ha, ha.  I love the teams, freshman were the best and boy the Spartans would hustle to the end.  

You fought a good fight, Jj and you ultimately won the best race ever!  I will see you again, my nephew, so miss having you here in the flesh.  Memories of your life with us plays over and over.  You are truly missed!

Until I see you again, I'll try and go to a game, but don't count on it.  Can't wait until your scholarship starts at Hales, what a time that would be, to see the first receiptant of the Jonathan McCoy Scholarship.

Love and miss you still...Auntie Nene

Uncle Don misses you too! 

I would be the first one to say, that Wrestling is a phony sport, even through my brother, Kenneth played it high school.  I guess in high school, it was serious, but the wrestling that was on tv was and still is phony, I don't know how people get drawn in. 

Well, to my dismay, I was one of those people who got drawn in.  It was only because of my two nephews, Thomas and Jonathan.  I was single at the time and I don't know how they talked me into Friday nights at Auntie Nene's house watching wrestling and ordering pizza.  Before the wrestling would start, I would say to both of them, how in the world are you two falling for this phony wrestling and Batista came out from behind the wall and Jonathan jumped off the couch and started doing Batista moves and I was floored, I mean he was really into it and Jj was serious, I said, WOW Jj, I didn't know you could do those moves, then they started telling me about everybody and I started getting hooked...me, I couldn't believe it, but I just so shock that Jj was so into it, I loved it.  


I no longer talked about wrestling, I wanted to know what happened, who won and who lost, if some wrestling news came on, I was calling the boys, who knew all about it...lol.


I really missed those days, just as I miss my Jj.  What a kid, now an angel, I'm so happy Jj has blessed by life.  Love and miss you Jj, always and forever.  Always in my heart, thank you Jesus!         

Oh how he loved the Holidays...Thanksgiving and Christmas!

I remember the last time we put the tree up.  The tree is a very old 7 1/2 foot green artificial pine tree.   It's so old it no could no longer stand upright in the metal stand without leaning.  We just let it lean, crooked in the corner by the window...so long as it didn't fall.  

Because I was annoyed with the old tree, I asked Thomas and Jonathan to put the tree up.  I was amazed at how beautiful the tree looked when I walked into the living room.  The lighting on the tree was beautifullly and evenly spaced.  They had done an awesome job.  The closer I got, I realized that these two funny men had taken the net lighting for the outdoor bushes and wrapped the three of them around the tree. The tree was bare...the poor thing only had the lights..no ornments or decorations of any kind.  As Thomas and Jonathan laughed and high fived each other on their Christmas creation,  I could only smile and shake my head.  Of course, Thomas reminded me that..."you said to put the tree up, Mom, you didn't say how!"  Really??  Seriously??

Needless to say, 2011 was the last time we put the tree up.   But, just for Jonathan, who loved the Christmas village..every since he was a little boy..it is up and still beautiful.  I will always put the village on display!






           

Believe it or not, Jonathan may have been the baby in the family, but he was so protective over his older brother Thomas.

When it was thundering and lightening, Thomas would be scared, Jonathan as a 2 year old would tell "Mas" that it would be okay.  He would call him "Mas" because he couldn't say "Thomas".  What brotherly love, praise the Lord!

Praise the Lord for the little things in life, precious memories that will be with us forever and ever.


     

Praise the Lord,
Some of you have asked me I how can I be so strong at a time like this, when our loss is so fragile. It is easy when you know what we know.  We are standing on God’s promises. It’s by God Grace and Mercy that I can stand strong…of myself I can do nothing.  I promised you all that I had something that I wanted to share with you regarding Jonathan…here it is.

I was supposed to have written this yesterday after I came home from bible study, but I fell asleep.  I had put off sharing this with you because I wasn't led to until now.  A former boss who happened to have been a minister, told me that my writing will not come from me, but from the Holy Spirit, so let it guide you.  

Well, it is exactly one month to the day that this amazing event occurred.   September 17 would have been Jonathan’s golden birthday, he would have been 17.  We knew we wanted to do something special for his birthday, so we decided to go down to the lakefront by the Adler Planetarium and send off balloons.  Because there was a special event going on for the Chicago Police department at Soldier Field, there was no parking on the streets around the museum campus.  The day looked a lot like yesterday, windy, cloudy and cold.  My first thought was a gloomy day, now this?  No sunshine, no warmth and no west to east breeze??  We drove around and eventually decided to take our chances, and we parked on the street near the planetarium.   My mom and sister wanted to join us, but I thought it would be too difficult for my mother to maneuver around the planetarium. My daughter, Alexis, said Jonathan would want Granny and Auntie Nene to be present and she was right.  My mom and sister met us there via taxi cab...I thank God they were there and you will see why.

We stopped off at the party store on south Archer or Ashland for the balloons.  We got nine white balloons and eight red…white for the purity and heaven and red for the blood of Jesus.  In addition, we got one Happy Birthday balloon.  I thank God for tech savvy children and sharpie pens.  We wrote our expressions of love on the balloons and videotaped each other sending them off into the sky.  We were disappointed that the balloons did not blow over the lake as we had hoped, but instead blew west into the city.   I secretly prayed that maybe one of the balloons would blow toward Michigan, and somehow (through God’s Grace) find its way to the family of the young man that received Jonathan’s heart.  It didn’t happen…we were exactly where God wanted us to be…the balloons blew in the direction that God wanted them to go.

For our final Happy Birthday tribute, we climbed the stairs of the planetarium to send off the remaining balloons, which were about eight including the birthday balloon.  Darrell, Alexis, Thomas, Shellene and I gathered for a prayer…then we released the balloons together shouting our expressions of love and we’ll miss you.  My mom, who was in her wheelchair below us, didn’t release her final balloon until she was ready…Amen.  We watched the balloons as they danced their way, letting the wind carry them up into places unknown until they were tiny specs in the sky.  I stepped away from the group to see if I could see them through the telescope.  As I was trying to adjust the focus on the viewer, my sister yelled, “Oh my God.”  She had taken two pictures of the sky in the direction the balloons had blown.  The Holy Spirit was at work.  She was there for this purpose.  Hallelujah!  Do you see what we see?  If you do, let me know. 

      GOD IS GOOD!  THANK FOR YOUR LOVE AND KINDNESS! The Lord said, “those who mourn, shall be comforted…the pure in heart, will see God…weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning.  I will send you a comforter…there is a peace that passes all understanding.”   We are at peace. There is so much joy in our hearts and we can smile because of it. We still grieve for Jonathan…we miss him terribly.  But our tears turn to happiness because he is in the best place he could be…safe with the Lord.  God called Jonathan home.  It was the Lord's Will.  This picture is confirmation to us and all who’ve seen it, the power of God. 

We believe Jonathan was given to us to give us joy, as he has, and to give life to others.  When Elder Conley said at Jonathan's eulogy that his name means "giver" in the bible, we thought how appropriate for God to have used JJ in this way.  We trust Him, believe His promises and praise His Holy Name.  We are comforted, the Holy Spirit gave us a gift...we will always know exactly where Jonathan is.  We serve a faithful God.  One who does what he said he will do.  Amen!

Thank you all for your love, hugs and words of comfort.